


Surviving Somehow

by xbetterthanrevengex



Category: The Walking Dead (Comics), The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Drama, F/M, Family Feels, Father-Daughter Relationship, Gen, Humor, Negan Being an Asshole, Rick Grimes is a Major Dad, Romance if you squint, Sister-Sister Relationship, Sisters fight but love each other, Spencer is a Fuckboy, With a Little Divergance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2018-11-28 17:57:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 38
Words: 159,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11423163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xbetterthanrevengex/pseuds/xbetterthanrevengex
Summary: All Ava wants is for her little sister Enid to be safe, and Alexandria seems to be the answer. However, when Ava realizes just how inept its' citizens are, she sees that the Safe-Zone is doomed to fail. That is, until another group strolls through the gates.





	1. Just the Two of Us

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I've had this idea rolling around in my head for awhile and I finally had to put it on paper. This is my first Walking Dead fic, and I promise the oncoming chapters will only get better! Enjoy!

Ava couldn’t believe what she was seeing. She wanted to scream, but the horror was stopping any noise from leaving her vocal cords. The gurgling of the dead cut through the tense air as Ava fell to her knees, her eyes never leaving the sight before her. The two forms of her parents laid on the dirt road as three walkers made a feast of their flesh, the roamers too busy with their kill to acknowledge her presence. She couldn’t have been gone for more than ten minutes—ten minutes to hunt while the couple worked to fix their broken-down SUV. Yet, that was all it took for her world to end. Again.

When humanity crumbled, they stuck together. They only had each other. Why did she leave them? They could’ve gone without food for another night. If Ava stayed, she would have been there to stop this, to save them.  An involuntary sob escaped her throat, the emotion making the walkers turn to her before slowly getting up and making their way over to indulge in dessert.

Ava slowly stood up, but she didn’t run. Instead, she pulled her hunting knife out from its’ sheath stalked over to the beasts. Ava let her rage win as she took out each Walker, angry grunts erupting from her throat as she allowed the tears to roll freely down her cheeks. Once she took care of the last one, Ava seethed her knife, her eyes landing on the mutilated bodies of her loved ones. It was then Ava put her hands on her knees and retched. The vomit came out like a river, landing in front of her feet as she continued to gag long after the contents left her stomach.

“A…Ava?”

Ava whipped around to look at the source of the small voice. Her frame was coated in blood, the tears that she had been crying making the liquid drip down her round cheeks—cheeks Ava would always pinch to get a rise out of her. 

“Enid.”

Without saying another word, Ava sloppily ran to Enid as she wrapped her little sister into an embrace. When Ava didn’t see her sister among her parents, she had assumed that Enid had took off running in a vain attempt to find Ava. She thought she would never see her again and, judging from the tight way Enid clutched onto Ava’s worn t-shirt, the elder sister assumed that Enid had thought the same of her.

“It was so bad,” Enid sobbed. “They…they came to the car…Mom and Dad tried to fight them off--.”

Ava gently shushed her, not wanting Enid to describe the trauma; doing so would only make her lose her little sister even more. Ava was content just standing there in silence, holding the one person who meant more to her than anything in the world. The sky had different plans as the clouds parted and rain began to coat the dirt road. Closing her eyes, Ava took a deep breath.

It was time to be rational, to be more than a big sister. Ava needed to be a leader.

“Let’s get out of here.”

Enid nodded, and Ava reluctantly released her from their hug. Silently, Enid took Ava’s hand, a gesture she had once saw as being ‘too babyish’.  The small act broke Ava’s heart, and she squeezed onto her sibling’s hand before tugging her into the woods in search of cover.

It was just them now, and Ava wasn’t going to let them fail.

* * *

 “You’re not holding it right.”

Enid tensed at the tired voice as she lowered the handgun. She thought that she was the only one awake but, turning around, Enid watched as Ava sat up in her sleeping bag. Enid put a hand to her heart in feign shock.

“You shouldn’t sneak up on someone when they have a gun in their hands.”

“I think I’m safe,” Ava scoffed. “Do you even know where the trigger is?”

“Ha. Ha.”

Ava smiled as she watched Enid turn the gun in her hand, examining the firearm. They guessed that they have been on their own for two months, and it was the first-time Ava had seen Enid pick up any sort of weapon. Their parents were deeply against Enid getting her hands dirty, stating that she wouldn’t need to defend herself because she would always have them.

What a lie.

Although Enid would never admit it, Ava was sure that her younger sibling was timid when it came to weapons. From the corner of her eye, she would catch Enid quietly flinching whenever Ava would use one; whether it be digging an arrow into a walker’s brain or firing a bullet to lure a herd away, she would have the same reaction. Of course, Ava never called her out on it. She knew her sister, and Ava didn’t have the energy to get into fights with Enid—not when each moment could be their last.

There was a small sense of relief within Ava when she woke up to see Enid aiming the weapon at a tree. This meant that she was willing to learn, or at least try. She stretched her arms, a tired yawn escaping her throat as she spoke.

“I can teach you to shoot, you know.”

Enid looked up from the weapon before giving a flippant response. “I know.”

Ava raised a brow. “Do you want to learn?”

“Mom and Dad wouldn’t like it.”

The response came quick, almost too fast for Ava to even prepare for it. Even after their death, Enid was still ‘the good child’. The one who listened to their parents without a fight while Ava went through her ‘angst’ phase until she was twenty. Ava shook her head. The past didn’t matter anymore, and Enid needed to realize that.

“Mom and Dad wanted you to be safe,” Ava pointed out as she turned to face Enid more directly. “They would want you to be able to defend yourself when I’m not around.”

Enid narrowed her eyes. “Planning on leaving me?”

“Never,” Ava sharply answered, “But Mom and Dad weren’t either.”

The judgmental glare faded and Enid looked down at her shoes, trying to hide the tears Ava didn’t mean to cause. Ava didn’t regret what she said; Enid needed to learn that the world didn’t follow the same rules anymore. Ava gestured for Enid to come into her arms, and the younger girl welcomed the comfort.  

“I’ll do everything I can to stay by your side,” Ava whispered into her hair, “But you need to fight to stay by mine, too.”

Ava felt Enid’s head nod, but the girl didn’t let go of her until a few more moments passed. Enid’s expression of sadness was now replaced with one of determination as she held the gun out to Ava, her small voice now dripping with strength.

“Teach me.”

* * *

The arrow pierced through the squirrel’s neck, making the unsuspecting animal topple to its’ side in a lifeless heap. Enid let out a small curse as she lowered the bow, the owner of the weapon walking past her to pick up their dinner. Looking down at the creature, Ava offered a small nod of approval.

“You almost got the eye!”

Enid groaned. “’Almost’ isn’t good enough.”

“Maybe,” Ava grinned as she picked up the animal and ripped the arrow out of it. “But it is closer than when you kept hitting nothing.”

She shrugged. “Whatever.”

Enid had been getting better with weapons; so far, her best skill came with knife wielding. Ava noticed that she still had trouble pulling the trigger of her gun, but if she could take a walker out with one stab to the skull, that was good enough for now.

However, it wasn’t Enid’s survival skills that were worrying Ava, it was her mental state. The pair had decided to leave the comfort of North Carolina to see what the North had to offer.  They have been traveling for a few months and their time on the road had showed Ava just how hollow Enid was becoming. The girl who was once unable to conceal her giggles in the most serious circumstances was now becoming hardened with melancholy behavior.

Ava couldn’t blame her. Enid had been dealt a rough hand, but it was hard watching her sister disappear into a cloud of negativity and despair. It was as if the little sister was just waiting for death.

_“The world wants to die,” She had said to Ava one evening, “It’s time to let it.”_

_Ava just shook her head. “Then why are we still here?”_

Ava tried to keep things light by cracking jokes, congratulating her on a kill or making dinner, but all Enid would do was roll her eyes in response. Or worse, she would downplay her achievements by stating what she did wasn’t ‘good enough’. Ava wanted to see her little sister smile again, she just didn’t know how.

“I’ll get this thing roasting,” Ava began her trek back to their camp for the evening. “You can practice a bit more, if you want.”

Enid brightened up at this—it was the first-time Ava saw her do so in a long time.

“Just don’t go too far.” Ava reminded her.

Enid nodded, already walking away. “I won’t!”

Ava simply shook her head before making her way to the camp. They had a bit more than they did only a few weeks ago; Ava had found a tent in a junkyard, and Enid found another sleeping bag, so they no longer had to share. She would never say it aloud, but Ava missed cuddling with her sister at night, but Enid needed the space. Ava had hoped the privacy would help her attitude, but so far, it hadn’t.

After skinning the squirrel, and making a fire, Ava began the slow process of cooking the animal; however, even after doing all of this, Enid still hadn’t returned.

And it was when Ava heard a scream pierce the air when her worst feelings were confirmed.

Grabbing her gun, Ava took off running into the woods, jumping over anything that would slow her down. Instinct made her want to scream Enid’s name, but she knew better. Whoever had her sister, Ava couldn’t alert them. Not if she wanted to have a chance to beat them.

When she saw figures in the distance becoming closer, Ava slid to her knees, ducking behind a bush to get her bearings. Her heart raced when her eyes landed on Enid, her baby sister corned by two older men; one stood behind her, covering her mouth while the other sneered in front. 

“You better not scream again, little girl.” The man in the front grinned as he whipped out his knife. “Or I’ll give you something to _wail_ about.”

Screw being cautious. Ava stood up, aiming her gun at the man.

“That’s enough.”

Her voice made the man in front look over to her as the one holding Enid turned to face Ava. At the sight of her elder sister, Enid’s eyes went wide, but Ava could see the small light of relief they had within them. The man holding the knife only looked afraid for a moment before slipping back into a smile.

“It looks like we’re just getting started,” He chuckled. “You got a name?”

Ava didn’t have time for bullshit. “Let her go.”

“That’s impolite, didn’t your mother teach you manners?”

She hummed. “She taught me not to talk to strangers.”

“Touché.” He looked between Enid and Ava. “Is it just you two, or ya’ll got a camp?”

Ava remained silent. She didn’t want these guys to know just how much they got on their own, although now it seemed that they would be leaving their goodies the moment Ava got Enid back.

“Fine, don’t tell me.” He shrugged, “But you’re going to have to pass me that gun.”

She didn’t flinch, her hands never shaking as she kept the weapon up. However, Ava’s rational thinking came to a halt when the man held a knife up to Enid’s cheek, getting ready to slice.

“I’m waiting…”

He pressed the blade down on her cheek, and Enid let out a small sound of pain through the man’s hand as the sight of blood began to drip. Ava quickly put the gun on the ground before putting her hands up.

“Take it!” Blood continued to be drawn, and Ava felt herself shake. “Just take it!”

He stopped and grinned. “Good girl.”

Ava watched with careful eyes as he made his way over to her. Giving his best smile, the man bent over to pick up the weapon. While his back was arched, his sights on the ground, Ava quickly got her knife out of her holster and drew it through his shoulder.

The man let out a wail and Ava kneed him in the face, the impact making him fall backwards. Enid took this as a sign to act, the girl biting the man’s hand. He yelped and let her go, giving Enid time to run back over to Ava and hide behind her as the elder picked up her gun. With one arm wrapped around Enid, and the other holding the weapon, Ava didn’t blink as she fired a shot into the head of the man who had once held Enid.

Ava then let Enid go as she got to her knees, straddling the ringleader as she began to plant punch after punch to his face.

“You like picking on little girls, huh?” She yelled, unable to stop herself from taunting the pervert. “Makes you feel tough?!” 

The man didn’t answer, he couldn’t with Ava pounding into him. Enid watched as Ava then took her knife and stabbed the man between the eyes, watching the life disappear from the orbs. Silence erupted through the forest, the only sound being Ava’s deep breaths as she looked between the man below her and the other fallen in the distance.

Ava had never killed a living person before, but now, she could add two to her count.

It was an odd feeling. Unlike the walkers, there was no sense of accomplishment. There was only a feeling of completing a mundane task; as if it was a daily chore that needed to be done. Ava did it for Enid, to protect her, but she didn’t know how her little sister would react. Would she see Ava as a monster? Would she be afraid of her?

Ava turned to face Enid, wanting to see the answer for herself.

Her heart dropped when she saw cold eyes, and a hardened expression, staring back. Unmoved.

* * *

Life was bleak.

Well, bleaker than usual.

The girls had run out of food two days ago and, with winter settling in Virginia, animals were beginning to disappear. Ava did shoot down a bird that was big enough for one of them to eat, and she gave it to Enid—much to the girl’s disapproval.

_“You need to eat too.” Enid shook her head as Ava practically shoved the cooked bird in her face._

_Ava didn’t hesitate. “You come first, Enid.”_

_“No.” Enid practically yelled, “It’s both of us, or none of us.”_

Seeing that Enid wasn’t going to eat, Ava tossed the bird. She hated that Enid would rather die than be alone. Ava realized she would have to sit down and talk to her about how, if she died, Enid would have to move on. It wasn’t a conversation she wasn’t looking forward to, but it had to be done.

They walked down a frigid path, the only sound being their feet against the dirt road…until the sound of rustling bushes made both girls freeze. Ava put her hand out to Enid, stopping the youngest from going any closer before aiming her bow towards the lush brush. After a short moment, a German Shepard stepped out of the green, his tongue hanging out as he paused in front of Ava, letting out a growl.

For a moment, Ava considered firing the arrow and dining on dog meat for the night. Between the two of them, the meat could last about a week. However, her plans were diminished when Enid put a hand out to the dog.

“Easy, boy. Easy.” She coaxed.

Enid knelt on the ground, the sudden movement making the animal move excitedly towards her. Ava was about to tell Enid to get away from the dog, to be ready to run, but the look of pure joy on Enid’s face made the eldest pause. It was the first time in a week Ava had seen Enid smile, the expression even reaching her brown eyes as she let the dog sniff her hand.

Ava felt her mouth turn up in a smile. “I think you made a new friend.”

“He’s so cute!” Enid whispered, giggling as she gave the dog a scratch behind the ears. “His collar says his name is Max!”

Ava looked for any sign of people, “I wonder if his owners are nearby…”

“Maybe food’s nearby.”

If dog owners were nearby, maybe they could offer them a small reward for bringing him back—perhaps in the form of food. However, Ava knew not to get her hopes up; these days, it was people who were the real threat, but she couldn’t bear to state the negatively aloud. Not when Enid was so happy.

Max let out a soft bark before taking off down the path, making Enid instantly stand up as Ava tensed.

“Where’s he going?” Enid frowned.

Ava turned to her before looking where the dog ran off to. They had nowhere else to be, nowhere to go, maybe the dog was a sign. Ava shrugged.

“Let’s find out.”

**XXX**

“Holy shit.”

Ava’s eyes widened at the sight of an abandoned camp in front of her. Two tents sat on either side of the clearing. One tent was completely ripped to shreds while a fire pit that has long been out of use sat between the two makeshift houses. Ava watched with interest as Max sniffed around a trash can, tail wagging with glee without a care in the world. Without a second thought, Ava made her way to the can, ignoring Enid’s scoff.

“I’m not _that_ hungry, Ava.”  

Ava looked down in the can, taking in the flies and smell before rolling up her right sleeve. “We need to check everywhere. Remember that.”

“Yeah, sure.” Enid waved her off as she made her way over to one of the tents.

Ava’s unbothered facade faded as she turned back to the can. She could practically see the stench of the trash radiating from the can. This was a new low for her. Yet, her growling stomach reminded her that the new world was filled with lows. Ava looked down at Max, who had taken a seat and looked at Ava expectedly. She rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, you enjoy the show, boy.”

With that, she dived her hand into the bin. After a few times of picking out pure trash, Ava finally felt a sense of accomplishment when she pulled out a sealed can. Her eyes grew wide as she read the label; Fresh Beans. A grin overtook her features before looking down at the dog, his tail wagging at the sudden attention.

“Oh, thank god,” She then turned to Enid. “I found dinner!”

Enid’s head popped out of the tent. “No freaking way!”

The young girl ran over to her sister, taking the can in her hands before giggling. Ava joined, and the two were delirious with laughter. After weeks of pitiful dinners that were comprised of pine nuts, they would finally have some real nutrients.

The sisters walked over to a log by the long burned out firepit as Ava took out her knife and began opening the can. The sight of brown and red beans made Ava almost start weeping with joy as she poured some into Enid’s hand before doing the same for herself. Moans that were once reserved for five-star meals were now the soundtrack of their small dinner.

“Did you find anything good?” Ava asked, wanting some lighthearted conversation.

Enid grinned. “A few comic books.”

Ava smiled back. When Ava and Enid were younger, and the phase of hating a sibling hadn’t hit yet, the older sister had introduced Enid to the world of comics. Although Ava once enjoyed them herself, and wanted to share the hobby, it was all to get Enid more excited about reading. Their parents were pleased when they saw just how much it worked.  Before Ava could add more, the sound of a whining dog made the two look down. Max laid at their feet, begging for a bite of food. Ava and Enid shared a look.

“He did lead you to the trash can.” Enid trailed off, a wishful tone in her voice.

Ava pursed her lips. The selfish side of her wanted to save a lot of the beans for themselves, but looking at Enid’s big eyes, and Max’s whines providing an ambient noise, Ava realized she didn’t have much of a choice. The older girl sighed before giving a smile.

“You’re right,” Her grin widened at the sight of Enid’s excitement. “Sharing is caring.”

Enid beamed as she poured a few more beans into a hand before reaching out towards the dog. However, instead of going for the food in her hand, Max knocked the can out of Enid’s hand and began lapping up the food.

It was then everything seemed to happen in slow motion.

As Enid reached to pick up the can, the dog latched onto her arm, pulling her down to the dirt ground. The younger girl screamed as she tried to rip her arm away from the dog’s jaw. Ava could only see red as she sprang into action; after all this time, she wasn’t about to lose Enid to a mutt.

Using the strength that could only come from pure adrenaline and anger, Ava grabbed the dog by his collar and pulled him off Enid. Ava could hear Enid’s heavy breathing, but her focus was on the devil dog. He growled, getting low before lunging towards Ava. However, the older girl was quicker as she delivered a kick to the dog’s chest, sending the animal over the log across from the pair.

When the dog didn’t return, Ava quickly ran over to Enid, dropping to her knees beside her little sister. Enid clutched her injured arm to her chest, her eyes threatening to release tears. Ava reached for her arm, but gesture making Enid huff in pain as she curled more into herself.  

“You have to let me see it, baby.” Ava coaxed, gazing at her with sad eyes.

Enid bit the side of her cheek to stop herself from screaming out as she slowly moved her arm away from her chest. Ava sucked in a breath at the wound. Enid’s arm was a mangled mess of flesh, canine indentions decorating the skinny limb as blood colored her skin red.

“I’m sorry…” Enid whispered, tone full of guilt.

Ava felt her heart drop at the apology. “None of this is your fault,” She spoke seriously before deadpanning, “If you try to apology to me again, I’m going to cut off your other arm.”

A small smile took over Enid’s lips before fading into a grimace of pain once more. For once, Ava didn’t have an inkling of what they could do. They ran out of medical supplies a few weeks ago and every place they scavenged came up empty. Ava would have to put her trust in people, that’s if any were even nearby. Taking her knife from her pocket, Ava cut a long piece of fabric from the oversized plaid shirt she wore before using the strip to wrap the wound.

“We’re going to find help.”

Ava could tell Enid wanted to protest. Enid was always wearier of people than Ava, even before the end of the world. However, judging from the weak nod the younger sister gave in response, Ava realized that she didn’t have the strength to voice her opinion.

Wrapping an arm around Enid’s body, Ava helped the girl to her feet. The pair slowly left the camp, and the dreadful memories it made, behind.

**XXX**

 

 The afternoon sun rose high in the sky, the leaves of the trees doing little to protect Enid and Ava from the harsh heat. Despite feeling Enid growing heavier in her arms, Ava continued to push on for the both.

The sun was cruel, but the night would be worse.

“How much further?” Enid weakly asked, her eyes half lidded.

Ava pursed her lips, trying to think of the answer that did not exist. She was still dealing with the shock that they hadn’t run into another campsite for miles. Even more terrifying, they hadn’t seen a Walker in hours; however, Ava didn’t want to jinx that. Ava pulled Enid closer to her.

“A few more miles,” Ava lied. “I think I saw smoke in the distance.”

Enid sighed, exasperated. “Can we just rest for a second?”

They needed to keep going, but one look at Enid’s face was enough to make Ava agree. The girl was drained of all color, her eyes drooping as Ava gently sat her against a rock. Ava took the spot next to her, pulling her knife out as she always did when she had to keep watch. Enid leaned into Ava, the older sister wrapping an arm around her as Enid dropped her head to Ava’s shoulder. Ava grinned, it would almost be like old times if Enid’s arm wasn’t mangled.

“Thank you.”

Ava kissed her head. “No problem, kiddo.”

It only took a moment for Enid’s steady breathing to fill the air, her face nuzzled in Ava’s neck comfortably. Ava looked around the forest before looking down at Enid’s arm. The blood was soaking through the makeshift bandage, the sight instantly making Ava look away. She wasn’t a Doctor, despite her parents’ wishes, but even Ava knew that they didn’t have long until the injury was infected. Even if they found people, did they know to treat a serious infection? The thought of losing Enid made Ava pull her closer into her body, as if the proximity of their bodies would be the best medicine.

Ava snapped to her senses as she looked around the forest. She looked down at Enid, the girl still sleeping soundly as Ava ran her free hand through her hair. Ava didn’t know if she was out for five minutes or hours; either length was too long. She looked around the area, thinking it was clear until the unmistakable sound of the dead reached her ears; a Walker was coming up right beside her. Ava silently cursed to herself before gently shaking Enid awake.

The girl was only angry for a moment, but soon grew alert when she saw what was coming. Weaker than before, it took Ava a moment to help Enid to her feet. As they walked, Ava could see more of the dead coming out of hiding. Ava wondered if they could smell the blood that was practically pouring out of Enid’s arm.

The younger girl hobbled, doing her best to keep up with the pace needed to escape death, but Ava could feel her growing heavier in her arms. Enid’s body wanted her to stop, and she was ready to let it. She took in Ava’s determined expression, and wondered if it was time for the older sister to let her go.

“Ava, I…”

Ava’s jaw clenched, as if knowing what Enid was about to say, “Shut up.”

Without another word, Ava scooped Enid up into her arms with a grunt. Ava darted through the woods, wanting more than anything to make it to the clearing at the end of it. She readjusted Enid in her arms more than a few times, but she never stopped moving; if she stopped, they were both as good as dead.

The clearing was close when Ava’s foot got caught on a root, sending both girls tumbling down onto the ground. Ava landed on top of Enid, the younger girl unable to stop herself from yelling out at the fall. Ava lifted herself slightly, looking behind her to see the Walkers advancing. She put a comforting hand on Enid’s back.

“Don’t move!”

She didn’t wait for Enid to answer as she pulled her pistol out, firing at the Walkers that were getting too close for comfort. She had only taken down five walkers when her chamber clicked empty; Ava had clearly overestimated her bullets. Her eyes grew wide when she saw a Walker coming closer to them. She took a few breaths as she pulled her knife out. The fight would be close, but Ava wasn’t going to die. Not like this. She was about to kick the Walker’s feet out from under him when a bullet planted itself into his head, sending him down on the ground next to Ava and Enid.

Ava gasped, confused. However, it was when she saw two bodies running towards her when she realized they weren’t alone. The closer they got, Ava began to see that they were two men; the realization made Ava grip her knife tighter.

The men they ran into seemed to think that they were owed something, and Ava was ready to defend Enid if this pair shared the same outlook. After taking out most of the Walkers, the men made their way over to Ava and Enid; the former instantly raising her knife in defensive.

“Whoa, okay,” The blonde put his hands up in a ‘surrender’ gesture, his words rushed as he struggled to catch his breath. “Relax.”

Ava was internally shocked at his appearance. He had to be the cleanest person she had seen on the road. His blonde hair perfectly combed, and looked to be washed, as his clothes only had a few droplets of dead blood on it. However, that didn’t make her lower the knife as the second man made his way over, his eyes wide as he took in Ava’s insane expression.

“Give me a reason to.” Her eyes narrowed.

“We get it,” A redhead stepped up. “Stranger danger and all that.”

Her knife shook slightly. ‘Stranger Danger’? Was this a joke? The two men shared a look before looking back down at Ava.

“We wouldn’t kill all these dead ones just to hurt you,” The redhead went on, “We want to help you.”

Ava blinked. That reasoning was logical, most crooks gave up when there was a horde near, but the men in front of her killed nearly all of them. Ava lowered her knife, but didn’t let her guard down.

“Well, you did what you wanted,” She gestured to the slayed Walkers. “Thanks, bye.”

The man opened his mouth, ready to try another tactic, when Enid’s coughing cut them all short. Ava ignored her senses and put her knife away before turning to her sister. Enid laid in a ball on the forest floor, cradling her arm as her body shook with coughs. Ava ran a hand through Enid’s long locks, trying to get it out of her face.

“Shit, Enid, look at me.”

“Av…” She began, but was unable to finish as coughs racked her form.

Ava put her hands-on Enid’s shaking body, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. She didn’t know what to do, how to help her crumbling sister, until the blonde man spoke up.

“We have a Doctor, with an office and everything!” He practically yelled. “If you go back to our Community, she can get the treatment she needs.”

Ava reluctantly tore her gaze away from Enid, taking in the pair of men before her. Surprisingly, they looked just as panicked as Ava felt, as if they knew Enid their whole lives as well. It gave Ava the smallest spark of hope.

“You better not be bullshitting.” Her voice came out more broken than Ava expected.

The redhead couched down in front of Ava, putting a comforting hand out to her as he spoke.

“You don’t have to like us, but you need to trust us,” He coaxed, his voice much gentler than his partner’s. “We can save her.”

That was all Ava needed as she scooped Enid up into her arms and ran after the pair out of the forest.

 

 


	2. Healing Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava and Enid arrive at Alexandria. While Enid spends time in the infirmary, Ava remains weary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! Sorry for taking so long to update, been busy with life. Hope you enjoy, and thanks for the kudos!

“We’re heading back to Alexandria now. We’re going to need medical assistance,” The redhead spoke into a walkie-talkie before turning to the driver. “Turn here, it’s faster.”

“Not since lighting struck that tree into the road.”

“Then cut through that thicket!”

“In this station wagon?” Blondie scoffed.  “Come on, Aaron.”

Ava did her best to ignore the bickering that was happening in the front seat as she focused on Enid. Her body was laid across the backseat, her head resting on Ava’s lap as the older girl ran her fingers through her hair, humming softly. Enid’s coughing fit subsided once Ava hesitantly accepted the bottle of water from the strangers, and since then, it seemed that Enid had tired herself out. Despite her quiet demeanor, Ava was panicking. 

Underneath her hand, Ava could feel Enid burning up, her forehead glistening as her body worked to sweat out the pending infection. Her breathing was steady, and her half-open eyes slowly blinked as she looked up at Ava.

“Mom?” Enid’s hoarse voice whispered.

Ava’s heart clenched, and she found herself unable to respond. Enid didn’t wait for one as she closed her eyes, falling back into a delirious slumber. Ava tore her gaze away from her pale face as she looked up towards the front, where the bickering had suddenly halted. She wondered if they heard Enid’s tiny voice as well.

“How much further?” Ava’s tone was sharp.

The redheaded passenger, who she deduced was named ‘Aaron’, turned to her. He offered a sympathetic expression.

“We’re almost there, I promise.” Aaron glanced down at Enid before looking back at Ava. “She’ll be fine, I know it.”

Ava resisted the urge to snap as she looked back down at Enid. Aaron didn’t know a thing about Enid, or Ava, and yet they were acting as if they have been friends for years. She wasn’t an idiot, Ava knew that they could be lying about having a Doctor and were driving them into their doom.

Ava could kill them both right now, take the car and drive until she found something to save Enid. However, the thought of losing an opportunity to get Enid to a Doctor because of Ava’s trust issues was enough to keep her from taking the pair down.

* * *

 

Entering the safe-zone, or ‘Alexandria’ as she heard Aaron call it, was a blur for Ava. She didn’t register the beautiful neighborhood filled with upper-middle class homes, or the guards that were stationed at the gate—or even the fact that they _had_ a gate with high walls surrounding the area.

No. All Ava could focus on was keeping up with the woman who was pushing the stretcher Enid laid upon.

She was waiting for them when the car drove in; a stout girl with blonde hair pulled back in a ponytail and dark-rimmed glasses. She couldn’t have been much older than Ava. Although she wasn’t what Ava expected, the older sister was relieved when she didn’t pry over personal things—all she did was ask Ava to put Enid down before taking off with her, asking questions as they ran. Ava felt the stares on her as she sped through the streets; nosy people poking their heads out of their curtains to catch a glimpse of the action while those outside yelled in confusion.

Ava didn’t realize Aaron was running beside her until she heard him yell for privacy to those who wouldn’t stop staring. Maybe having him around wasn’t so bad.

The woman and the stretcher came to a sudden stop in front of the porch steps leading up to a house. Understanding that this was where they needed to be, Ava quickly scooped Enid into her arms as she followed the woman into the country home.

Well, it was once a home. An examination table, desk, and cabinets full of medical supplies took the place of traditional furniture. Despite the impressive setup, Ava didn’t pay it much mind; her own thoughts focused on following the woman’s directions as she carefully laid Enid down on the metal table. Once she was laying down, Ava couldn’t resist planting a small kiss to her forehead, hoping that she felt it in her delirious state.

“Denise,” A gruff voice slowed down the action of the room, and Ava turned to see an older man walking down the stairs, pulling on gloves. “Diagnosis.” 

“Dog bite,” Denise repeated what Ava told her as she rummaged through one of the cabinets. “Possible infection.”

Ava reluctantly stepped back, giving the Doctor room as he peeled away the makeshift bandage. The sight of the injury made Aaron gasp while Ava had to fight the urge to vomit. It looked much worse than just a few hours ago; the blood now dried and crusty around the wound. The Doctor glanced up at Ava, an accusing look in his eyes.

“Are we _sure_ it’s a dog bite?”

Ava’s worry was momentarily replaced with anger. Did this guy really think she would lie about this? She knew that a Walker bite was the end for everyone, Ava wasn’t dumb to think that Enid could be cured if such a thing were to happen. She may not have trusted this community, but she wouldn’t put others in danger. The implication that she would made Ava’s blood boil.

“We wouldn’t have brought a bit person within the walls, Pete.” Aaron spoke Ava’s mind, looking just as angry as Ava felt.

Ava glanced at Aaron, wondering why he was still here. She appreciated his support, but Ava wanted him to know that she didn’t need his help.

“It was a dog, I was there.” She bit out. “If my sister got bit, I would’ve ended her suffering the moment it happened.”

Pete looked ready to interject when Denise walked over to him, examining Enid’s bite. She then gestured with her finger the markings.

“Those are canine indents, Pete.” Denise explained before handing him a bottle. “She would have been rotting by now, anyway.”

Pete scowled, but accepted the knowledge. Ava crossed her arms over her chest, resisting the urge to give the man the middle finger. He was saving Enid’s life, after all. Her moment of bliss was interrupted when she heard Enid wail out, her face twisting in pain as her eyes snapped open. Denise held her down as Ava looked over to see Pete dabbing liquid into the wound.

“What are you doing?!”

Out of spite, Pete ignored her. Ava’s jaw clenched, and she began to weigh the consequences of punching the Doctor. However, her mental pros and cons list was interrupted when Denise answered over Enid’s screams.  

“It’s hydrogen peroxide,” She explained what Pete refused to, “It’s going to stop the infection.”

 Ava stopped listening the moment she heard Enid scream her name. Without a second thought, Ava ran over to the table, holding onto the hand of her uninjured arm. End looked right at her as she squeezed Ava’s hand, silently begging her big sister to make the pain go away. For the first time in their lives, Ava couldn’t help her sister. All she could do was watch and pray for a swift and calm ending to the pain. Tears began to burn Ava’s eyes and she found herself holding onto Enid just as tightly.

“I’m right here,” Ava comforted, “I’m right here, Enid.”  

_And I’ll burn this place to the ground if they kill you._

* * *

 

Aaron was waiting for Ava when she slowly stepped out onto the porch, the man instantly standing up from the swing he was resting on. He had left during the proceedings, suddenly feeling more like a nuisance than a helper. He also knew how Pete could get when too many people were in his space, and he didn’t want Ava to deal with his prissy attitude.

Ava was more than a little surprised to see Aaron lingering. The sky was now pink with sunset, signifying the end of what had to be a long day for him. Taking in his wide eyes, Ava realized that he was waiting for news—news she was actually eager to share.

“She’s stable,” Ava announced. “The pain meds Denise gave her knocked her out and Pete’s stitching her up.”

Aaron closed his eyes in relief before letting his mouth turn up in a genuine smile. The reaction made Ava grin herself. Sharing the news with someone made it feel truly real. She had forgotten what good news tasted like and it was sweeter than she remembered.

“That’s great news,” Aaron let out a breathy chuckle, “Thank God.”

As Aaron ran his hand through his curly locks, a relieved smile on his face, Ava couldn't help but watch him with a curious eye. He was genuine in his worry for Enid, and was thrilled that she would be okay. In that moment, no matter how weary she felt of the community and the man in front of her, Ava knew she had him to thank for her sister's life.

“Thank you,” The words left Ava’s lips before she could think about them. “If you didn’t show up when you did…that could’ve been it for Enid. And me.”

"Thank Eric," He waved her off with a grin. “He’s the one that saw you two.”

It was then Ava realized that she hadn’t seen the blonde since the car ride, and the pair didn’t share a real interaction besides the one where Ava was waving a knife in his face. She did need to thank him, and his watchful eyes.

“Where is he?” Ava couldn’t hide her grin. “You two seemed to be attached at the hip.”

“He was sitting with me a bit,” Aaron admitted. “But he had to go and tell Deanna that you wouldn't be meeting her until tomorrow." 

Ava’s once pleasant expression plummeted into confusion. This was the first time Aaron, or Eric, have even uttered the name Deanna, and yet she was so important that Ava had to speak with her? Something didn’t feel right to Ava, and Aaron seemed to sense that.

“I’ll explain.”

Ava narrowed her eyes, “You better.” 

* * *

 

Despite the good news, Ava didn’t let her guard down as she walked with Aaron through Alexandria. On the surface, it resembled a perfect slice of life that was once forgotten. She took in the beautiful homes, and the kids playing the twilight away on front lawns. Porch lights began to click on, most likely from the sustainable energy the neighborhood thrived on.

There had to be a catch.

“Most of the residents have been here since the beginning,” Aaron explained as they walked. “But Eric and I were assigned by Deanna to go out and recruit more people to get the community established.”

Deanna. Aaron told her that she was the leader of Alexandria—though, the word sounded foreign on his tongue. The congresswoman saw promise in Alexandria and, along with her two sons and husband, she was determined to make it the rebirth of civilization. Ava couldn’t deny that Deanna held a nice sentiment, but it wasn’t realistic. She couldn’t let her apprehension be shown though, not yet.

Ava needed to play the game.

“It’s impressive.” Ava forced a smile.

Aaron shrugged, a ghost of a smile on his face. “It’ll get there.”

They walked a couple of more paces when Aaron suddenly stopped, his pause making Ava almost run into him. He gestured to the space in front of him, eyes shining with mischief.

“Well,” He grinned, “Take your pick.”

Ava looked up at the three massive houses in front of her. Houses she would never even dream of owning in her previous life due to the pitiful pay an online journalist received. Now, she could simply point to one and live in it without a single bill. Taking in her dumbstruck expression, Aaron couldn’t help but smile.

“There’s a lot of empty houses, but I figured you’d want to be close to Enid.”

Ava blinked, her throat dry with anxiety. “This is…too much.”

“After what you’ve been through, Ava,” Aaron sighed, “It’s not enough.”

Ava merely pursed her lips. He had no idea the hell they have gone through, but Aaron was right. They had faced the horrors of the outside world and have beat them all. Ava mentally shook her head, stopping herself from agreeing with Aaron, and falling into the trap of a 'clean living'.

The catch. Ava had to remember that there was a catch.

* * *

 

When Ava walked through the front door, she felt as if she was entering a time warp. It was even bigger on the inside, with actual furniture and knick-knacks decorating the space. Fresh blankets and sheets sat on the leather couch, but Ava made a beeline to the kitchen. For someone who had a cramped apartment before the end, and a kitchen that was barely big enough to function in, the kitchen in this house felt like a kingdom.

Turning on the sink and seeing clear water coming out of it made Ava sob with relief. Stopping herself from falling into the trap of clean living would be harder than she thought. 

Ava ignored the strong part of her brain and wasted no time running up the stairs to one of the two bathrooms, peeling her clothes off as she went. As she waited for the shower water to heat up, Ava took the time to study herself in the mirror. She couldn’t remember the last time she looked at herself, but when she caught her own gaze staring back at her, Ava realized just how filthy she was.

Her face was covered in dirt and grime—most likely fresh from falling on the forest floor with Enid. Her brown hair was frizzed and wild; matching the look in her eyes. Her arms and legs were bruised up from months of braving the elements. No wonder why no one questioned her when she entered the gates. They all must have been scared out of their minds.

When she stepped under the hot water, Ava couldn’t help but laugh. The water dripped down her back, filling her with a sense of relief she hadn’t felt in months. She washed her hair five times and scrubbed herself clean six, a soft smile on her face as she watched the dirt disappear from her skin. 

_Enid’s going to love this._

The thought made Ava pause.  She didn’t even know if they were going to stay here, and Ava was already making plans to show Enid around. If she knew her little sister, Ava had a feeling Enid wouldn’t be too excited to stay behind the walls. Enid liked it being just the two of them, but maybe she liked the outside world too much.

Ava shook her head, not wanting to get ahead of herself. She would see how her talk with Deanna went tomorrow. If she didn’t like what the leader had to say, Ava would wait until Enid was healed up, had a shower and proper meal, and then they would head out without another word.

They could use this place, but they needed to do it before it used them.

* * *

 

The next morning, Ava woke up on the floor of the living room.

After hours of tossing and turning, Ava deemed the bed too soft and decided on taking her pillow and comforter downstairs. The wood floor was familiar to her, and the memories of sleeping with Enid on forest floors and concrete sidewalks drifted her into a dreamless slumber. Sunlight painted the room in glorious light, and Ava took it as a sign to get up and face the day. Although Denise told her that the painkillers would knock Enid out for a good day and a half, Ava wanted to visit her little sister before going to Deanna. 

She wrapped her bra and underwear-clad body in the comforter, ready to go up the stairs and change back into her dirty clothes when a knock on the door made her freeze. Through the glass window, a blond woman smiled warmly at her, the woman’s arms full with a laundry basket of items. Ava considered ignoring her, but realized she had a part to play. Moving the comforter tighter around her form, Ava walked to the door and answered it.

“Good morning,” She smiled even wider. “Ava, right?”

 Ava didn’t like that this woman knew her name. Not one bit.

“That’s right.”

“I work in the pantry,” She explained after taking in Ava’s weary expression. “Aaron told me you might need some clean clothes and toiletries.”

She held the basket out for Ava to take, but the woman simply looked at the object. Even if her alarm bells in her head weren’t going off, Ava didn’t exactly want to flash a stranger. As if realizing that Ava was less than clothed beneath her comforter, the blonde simply placed the basket inside the house and on the floor. Ava used her foot to drag it closer to her, getting a glimpse of a few outfits as well as a toothbrush and toothpaste. She offered a polite smile that felt foreign on her lips.

“Thank you.”  She blinked, awkwardness creeping over her form. “I, uh, just woke up.”

“I can see that,” She grinned, eyeing the pillow on the floor. “Rough night?”

Ava positioned herself so that the pillow was hidden, but it was too late. The last thing she wanted was for a resident to see her vulnerability. However, if any of them did try to come in during the night to finish her off, Ava knew they wouldn’t stand a chance against her.

“Maybe.” Ava decided to keep it vague.

The woman nodded, seeing that she wouldn't get much else from her. “I’m Jessie, by the way.”

Jessie. Ava couldn’t promise that she would remember the name, but she most likely wouldn’t have to.

“Ava,” Ava introduced herself, but then shook her head. “But, apparently, you knew that.”

“Yeah, news travels fast here,” Jessie gave a sheepish smile. “You know, my older son is about your sister’s age. Maybe once she’s healed up, you guys can come over for dinner one night.”

For a moment, Ava thought Jessie was joking. The invitation that would once seem normal and part of a life of domestic bliss felt foreign to the girl now.  However, taking in her genuine expression, Ava realized Jessie was sincere. Sincerity was also hard to come by beyond these walls, as were kids that Enid could interact with. A social outing wouldn’t hurt her distance sister, perhaps it would even open Enid up to the way she was before. Ava stopped herself.

Remember the catch.

“I’ll have to talk to Enid about it.”

“Of course, no pressure.” Jessie put her hands up momentarily before gesturing to the comforter. “I’ll let you get ready.”

"Thanks," Ava nodded. “And thank you for the...stuff, too." 

Jessie smiled, and Ava took that as a sign that it was okay to close the door. However, as she started to shut the front door, Ava noticed Jessie biting her lip, as if fighting to say something. Ava didn't want to hear it, and went to shut the door faster, but was too slow when Jessie spoke up.

"It's okay to not be okay." Jessie practically blurted, her voice low. "I just...hope you know that."

Ava opened her mouth, but couldn't find any words to say. It seemed that Jessie didn't expect an answer as she walked down the porch steps, only looking behind her once to send Ava a smile of sympathy before continuing on her path. Ava quickly shut the front door and locked it, placing her back on it as she struggled to control her breathing. These people knew nothing about her, and yet, they knew what buttons to push. Did they have a game plan themselves? Or were they truly genuine in their concerns for both herself and Enid?

Ava had a feeling she would find out when she came face to face with Deanna. 

 


	3. Transparency

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava meets Deanna.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments! The motivation it gives me is super real, lmao. Hope you enjoy!

Enid was still asleep when Ava walked into the Doctor’s quarters, her body looking smaller than ever as she dozed in the white bed. Taking a seat next to the cot, Ava couldn’t stop herself from gulping. Enid was making fantastic progress; color was returning to her once white face, and she wasn’t sweating as profusely as she was the day before. Yet, seeing her sister connected to an IV and a heart monitor only reminded Ava that she failed in protecting her.

Ava let her guard down. She let her own need to see Enid’s smile again get in the way of her safety. They shouldn’t have trusted the dog; they had no idea how long he had been out there. For that moment, Ava let her emotions get in the way of her logic. She made a mental note to never let that happen again.

However, looking at Enid’s peaceful expression, Ava knew it would be easier said than done.

“I think this place could be the best of both worlds,” Ava found herself voicing her thoughts, as if a sleeping Enid would contribute. “I’m meeting their leader today. Aaron calls it an interview, but it sounds like a test.”

“Well, you’re not wrong.”

Ava nearly gave herself whiplash to find the source of the voice. From the bottom of the stairs, Denise flinched, holding onto a mug tightly to stop it from hitting the ground. Ava raised a brow. The nurse was acting as if Ava was the one who snuck up on her. Was everyone in this community as nervous as she was?

“Sorry!” Denise spoke loudly before putting her voice at a normal volume. “Sorry. I, uh, didn’t mean to interrupt.”

Ava shrugged. “It wasn’t much of a conversation.”

“Right.” Denise nodded before walking forward, holding out the mug. “I heard you come in. Thought you would want some caffeine.”

Ava simply stared at the mug, not making any move to take it. Even before the world went to shit, Ava was never keen on accepting drinks from strangers, or anything left by them. Before making her way over to the Doctor’s office, Ava looked through the kitchen to find a single box of oatmeal in the cabinet. Her growling stomach tempted her to take it, but in the end, she decided against it. It could’ve been a trap.  The silence grew awkward, and it wasn’t until a few minutes later when Denise understood what was making Ava hesitate.

“Oh, shit. I’m not a murderer or anything,” Ava raised a brow, and Denise let out a nervous laugh. “And I just realized how suspicious that sounded.”

Ava had to purse her lips to stop herself from smiling. If Denise was a murderer, or was picked by Deanna to drug Ava, she wasn’t exactly as cunning as she should be. Ava’s eyes widened when Denise took a long gulp of the drink, wanting to prove herself to the woman who came from outside the walls. After drinking it down, Denise slightly panted before grinning at Ava.

“Okay, it’s super-hot, but safe.”   

 Denise outstretched the mug to her once more. After a moment of hesitation, Ava decided to take the risk and accepted the gift. The nurse visibly relaxed as Ava took a sip of the concoction, and she couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Ava closing her eyes in relief. It had been a while since Ava drank anything that wasn’t water, and she didn’t realize how much she missed coffee until the liquid was going down her throat, warming her stomach.

“Thank you,” Ava voiced. “I can’t believe you guys have coffee here.”

“There’s a lot more where that came from,” Denise smiled. “The pantry is always loaded.”

Jessie mentioned that she worked at the pantry. Maybe making nice with her would give Ava and Enid first dibs—and, if they decided to leave, maybe they could find a way in to take a few items for the road. Ava never liked to steal, but if the pantry was as stocked as Denise claimed, they wouldn’t miss a few cans of beans. Ava paused her thoughts. She would wait to see how her talk with Deanna went before making any permanent plans. Her eyes followed Denise as she went to the other side of the bed, checking on Enid. Maybe she could get some Intel, Ava didn’t want to go in blind.

“So, I guess you passed Deanna’s test.”

“Believe it or not, she deemed me sane.” Denise adjusted her glasses. “I wasn’t out there long, and even if I was, I’m not much of a threat.”

Ava nodded. “And I’m sure being a nurse helped.”

Ava noticed how Denise seemed to tense at the title, and she felt her own stomach clench with the fear of what she was about to confess.

“I, uh, actually never got to any practical training,” Denise sheepishly admitted. “I was training to be a surgeon, but I got too anxious and decided to go into psychiatry.”

Denise studied Ava, hoping to get a glimpse at how she felt about the confession. Ava simply sat back in her chair. It made sense; besides cleaning out Enid’s wound, it was Pete who did all the heavy Doctor work. She shrugged.

“Still useful,” She gestured down to Enid. “You helped saved her, and that’s all that matters to me.”

 Ava didn’t know why she felt the needed to reassure Denise. Hell, she still didn’t know why she liked the blonde. Besides the confession, she knew next to nothing about her. Maybe it just felt good to talk to someone who wasn’t related to her by blood, and wasn’t digging for information. Denise smiled.

“Pete points me in the direction I need to go,” She admitted. “And Deanna likes useful people.”

Ava nodded, and began to wonder how Deanna gauged someone’s ability. She would soon find out. As if reading Ava’s thoughts, Denise waved a hand to her.

“She’ll like you, I just know she won’t want to let you go.”

A ghost of a smile appeared on Ava’s lips. That’s what she’s afraid of.

* * *

 After thirty minutes of chatting, Aaron arrived to the office—which Ava learned was Denise’s home—to take Ava to Deanna. With a promise from Denise that she would let her know if Enid woke up, Ava reluctantly followed Aaron out of the house and down the streets of Alexandria. More people were awake now; an elderly couple sat on their porch while children played in the front lawns. Residents waved as they passed one another. The domestic bliss of it all made Ava slightly queasy.

Ava felt even more sick when Aaron told her to hand over her weapons.

“Your knives and gun will be in the armory, but you’ll be more than welcome to take them beyond the wall,” Aaron explained after taking in Ava’s angry expression. “You still have your bow, though!”

Uneasiness swam in Ava’s eyes as she stared at the man. She found it odd how all these rules were becoming known to her the day after her arrival. However, even she had to admit that she and Enid arrived in an uncongenial way; Aaron explained that he simply forgot to ask her to turn them over.

“I thought you’d feel more comfortable having them with you your first night,” Aaron admitted in a low voice, as if worried he’d get caught. “I know what it’s like. I’ve been there.”

Ava blinked, ignoring his comment. “And if Enid and I decide to leave?”

She noticed Aaron’s face fall at that possibility, but his sadness didn’t affect her.

“You won’t have a problem getting them back, I assure you.”

Assurances meant nothing to Ava, but she decided to play the part as she handed over her holsters and backpack. She’d go along with their insane rule. For now.

* * *

 “Ava, it’s nice to finally meet you,” A short, middle-aged woman smiled as she stood in the open doorway. “I’m Deanna Monroe. Won’t you come in?”

Ava looked over at Aaron, who sent her one last supportive smile before nodding at Deanna and making his way down the porch steps. Stepping aside, Deanna allowed Ava to walk into her home. The older woman watched with a small smile as Ava openly gaped at her surroundings. Although Ava slept in a home last night, there was something about seeing a lived-in space that made her pause; dirty dishes in the sink, blankets unfurled on the couch. A family lives here, and Ava never felt more out of place.

“You’ve been living like this the whole time?” Ava asked, her eyes scanning a bookshelf.

“My family and I got stopped on a back road and the Army directed us here,” Deanna explained as Ava turned to face her. “They were supposed to come later. As you can see, that never happened.”

Ava remembered those days all too well. She was lucky that she was visiting home while taking a break between assignments. She didn’t have to look for her family the way she knew a lot of the population did. Once the safe-zone in Enid’s high school gym went to shit, they evacuated the small town and never looked back. After days of driving, they didn’t see much of the living anymore.

 “You never left?”

Ava realized that she was meant to be the interviewee, but she just had so many questions. Luckily, Deanna seemed to welcome it.

“My sons and husband, Reg, took a small group out to the nearby shopping mall to get supplies for the wall,” She noted. “Now, my sons Spencer and Aiden lead groups out to scavenge.”

Ava merely nodded as she walked more around the living room, looking out the window to look at the wall in question. From her standpoint, she could see a clock tower attached to it. She wondered if they had any scouts up there. She saw that there were always people watching the gate, but that tower could be a way to cover blind spots.

“Would you like to take a seat?”

Seeing how her pacing was unnerving the leader, Ava took refuge on an armchair across from the couch. A small hum escaped Ava’s throat, appreciating the comfort it brought; the seat was so comfortable, Ava was sure she could get a good eight hours of sleep on it. Luxurious.

“It’s a nice place.” Ava had to admit.

“And it will only get better,” Deanna maneuvered behind the couch, bringing Ava’s attention to a camcorder. “Do you mind if I record our talk?”

She blinked, “Why?”

“Transparency,” Deanna explained, hitting record. “It’s good to keep a record.”

Ava wanted to tell her how transparency meant shit in this world. This world turned everyone into master manipulators, able to turn on the charm and kindness only to take what they needed. It almost happened to her.

“How long were you and Enid out there?”

Ava pursed her lips, “Since the beginning.”

“Was it always just you two?”

 “No,” Ava cleared her throat. “Our parents were with us for a bit.”

“What happened to them?”

Ava could already feel her eyes burning. She tried not to think about her parents, the daily grind of trying to survive made it easy not to focus on the past. Yet, when night fell and she kept watch, thoughts of the pair always crept into her head. Thoughts of how they would be alive if Ava was there. How she could have saved them, and Enid wouldn’t be growing up without a mother and father.  She looked up at Deanna. Although she had been honest to the leader, Ava wasn’t ready to reveal the painful information running through her mind.

“The same thing that happens to everyone.”

 Deanna frowned, and Ava didn’t miss the flash of sympathy in her eyes. She resisted the urge to scoff. This woman didn’t know the loss Ava and Enid experienced; she was able to live in a bubble when the world ended. They didn’t have that luxury.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Deanna sincerely spoke before switching gears. “I’m glad to hear Enid is making a speedy recovery.”

Ava couldn’t stop the smile on her face. “She’s tough.”

“I can’t wait to meet her,” Deanna smiled. “We have a school here that kids her age go to in the afternoons. Do you think that would be something she’d like?”

A school. Aaron wasn’t kidding when he said that this was more than a neighborhood. It was a way of life. Although it took Enid a while to get into reading, Ava could tell she always enjoyed going to school. She liked the social aspect of it—however, with the woman Enid was becoming, it was hard to picture her as the social butterfly she once was.

“It’ll be something she’d have to adjust back into,” Ava decided to be honest. “But, I don’t know if we’re going to stay.”

“What’s making you second guess?”

“Enid hasn’t even seen it yet,” Ava began to pick at a seam on the chair, “We’ll need to discuss it.”

“Of course,” Deanna nodded. “But why do I feel like there's something else?"

Ava took in Deanna's questioning expression. The woman clearly didn't like bullshit. If she wanted transparency, Ava was ready to give it to her.

"It doesn't seem as safe as you claim it to be," The words came out of Ava's mouth like vomit. "You have people on watch, but no way for anyone behind the walls to defend themselves."

"Carrying behind the walls evokes fear," Deanna explained. "Fear isn't how we rebuild society."

Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes. The world ran on fear now, it was how most people survived. They were afraid of turning, afraid of being killed by their fellow man. However, what Deanna was speaking about wasn't fear. 

“Protecting your community is how it can thrive," Ava leaned forward. "What if you need to protect the community from Enid and I?"

She raised a brow. “Are you planning to attack us?”

“Only if you attack us first.”

It may not have been the best first impression, but Ava couldn’t stop the hard gaze she projected on Deanna. She was never a violent person; even out there, Ava didn’t attack unless Enid was threatened. If she had any indication that Deanna, and the Alexandrians themselves, were planning to harm her little sister, Ava would kill them all. 

Deanna didn’t seem phased by the outburst. Instead, she merely leaned back on the couch, narrowing her eyes.

“You’ve had bad experiences,” She deduced, and Ava held her stare. “We did too. I let a group in that shouldn’t have been allowed in.”

Ava raised a brow.  “What did you do?”

“Exiled them,” Deanna deadpanned. “When I see my family threatened, I don’t waste time either, Ava.”

Ava’s eyes went to the coffee table in front of her. Deanna was making a point, but Ava could hear the connotations behind her words. She wouldn't hesitate to kick Ava and Enid out. However, to Deanna, exile was considered a death sentence. Ava and Enid saw it as returning to form. 

“What did you do before this?”

Ava would need to teach Deanna how to do smoother transitions. She sat up.

“Does it matter?”

Deanna grinned. “I was a congresswoman. It matters to me.”

That would explain her natural leadership skills. Ava could tell Deanna had the ability to command a room. She couldn’t help but let out a laugh as she admitted her own profession.

“I was a journalist for an online magazine.”

Deanna laughed as well. “We’re natural enemies then.”

“My outlet focused more on celebrity gossip,” Ava sheepishly admitted. "You were spared."

The casual conversation made Ava’s head her, especially after a tense exchange. Ava wasn’t used to it, and it was clear Deanna could tell. She sent Ava a light smile.

“Well, we just might be able to get along, then.”

The corner of Ava’s mouth quirked upwards before falling once again. Maybe she could get along with Deanna, but if the rest of the community was as clueless as she was about the outside world, Ava didn’t know if Alexandria would be a good fit. Deanna opened her mouth, ready to ask another question when the front door opened. Ava quickly turned to look at the noise, her senses on high alert as Deanna simply looked at the intruder with wide eyes.

“Spencer,” Deanna's voice was lighter at the sight of her son. “What’s wrong?”

Ava put the clues together that Spencer was the son Deanna spoke about. He couldn’t be much older than Ava, and even she had to admit that he wasn’t bad to look at.

“I’m sorry to interrupt but Pete told me to get her.” Spencer gestured to Ava.

Ava stood up, all thoughts of his attractiveness getting erased from her mind. 'Enid' was the only thought whirling through her head.

“Is something wrong with Enid?”

Spencer exhaled, a grin overtaking his face. Ava tensed, hoping this wasn't a dream...or a joke. 

“She’s awake.”

 


	4. Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enid gets a small taste of life in Alexandria while Ava comes up with a game-plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! This chapter is a little longer, but I hope you like it!

When Ava saw Enid sitting up in bed, a glass of water in her hands, she had to swallow back a sob. It was one thing to be told that she would have a speedy recovery, but it was a whole other experience seeing Enid with her eyes open. Awake and alive. Ignoring Pete and Denise’s presence, Ava quickly made her way over to the bed and wrapped Enid in an embrace, almost making the younger girl spill her water.

“Did you really think I was going to die that easily?” Enid teased quietly into her ear, but Ava could hear her voice laced with emotion. “Please.”

A broken laugh escaped Ava’s throat. “Brat.”

Once the moment passed, Ava listened intently to Pete’s directions on how to care for the stitches. Her hand never left Enid’s as she nodded along to the Doctor’s orders; make sure the stitches stay dry when Enid showered, come back here in ten days to get them removed.

“Thank you,” Ava spoke to Pete before turning to Denise, whom was busy unhooking Enid from the machines. “Both of you.”

“All in a day’s work.” Pete waved her off, already looking down at his notes.

On the other hand, Denise looked touched by the thanks. She would have gone with Spencer to fetch Ava, but she didn’t want to miss the look on the girl’s face when she saw her sister. It made the job, and working with Pete, worth it. The nurse smiled.

“Glad to help.”

Ava watched intently as Enid got out of the bed with ease, the younger sister rolling her eyes when she noticed Ava’s worried expression. She was only out for a night; her legs weren’t exactly numb. However, the pain meds did leave her with a bit of a high that made her hold onto Ava’s arm for balance as they walked out of the house and into the Alexandria air.

Ava grinned as she looked down at Enid, trying to gauge her sister’s reaction to the community around them. She wasn’t disappointed when she saw Enid’s eyes widen, looking around at the children and families walking down the streets as if the apocalypse never happened. For a fleeting moment, Enid wondered if the end of the world was all just a dream. However, Enid knew dreams could form into nightmares.

“Well?” Ava asked, hoping to get a peek into her mind.

Enid had to admit, it was something to behold, but she only had one thought on her mind since she heard Pete’s directions.

“They have showers here?”

* * *

 

The moment Ava covered Enid’s sutured arm with a plastic bag, Enid disappeared up the stairs, ready to take advantage of Alexandria’s running water. Ava stood at the bottom of the stairs, her gaze locked on Enid’s back.

“Call me if you need help!”

She didn’t bother to turn around. “Uh-huh!”

Ava shook her head with a giggle. Enid’s enthusiasm was a delight to witness, but Ava knew not to get too used to it. Enid hadn’t had a chance to fully witness the life behind the walls, and Ava had a feeling she would have the same reaction that she had only hours before.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. Once again, Jessie stood in the doorway; this time, she carried only a few items in her hands.

“Me again,” She smiled widely. “Pete told me that Enid got discharged, so I thought I’d add to your pile.”

“That’s awesome,” Ava slightly grinned as she took a few plaid shirts. “Do you, uh, want to come in?”

Jessie’s smile grew as she stepped inside, closing the door behind her before following Ava into the living room. After coming to the house twice to deliver items, it only seemed right for Ava to invite her in. Besides, it would give Ava good practice on being a ‘people person’.

“How’s your sister doing?” Jessie asked, taking a seat on the couch. “Does she like the place?”

“She’s good and _really_ loves the shower,” Ava joked before shrugging. “We…haven’t really talked about it much.”

Jessie nodded. Ava knew she couldn’t exactly relate to her experience; much like the rest of the residents, she had been in Alexandria since the beginning. Ava looked through the basket Jessie brought earlier, hoping to find a few items Enid could use. Jessie watched with interest as Ava rummaged through the belongings. Her gaze then fell on the blanket and pillow on the ground, and Jessie began to wonder if it was truly Enid’s opinion that was keeping Ava on the fence.

“How about you?” She asked, her tone light.

 Ava paused as she took a pot out, thinking over the question. Alexandria was amazing on the surface, but the more she found out from Deanna’s meeting, the more Ava was beginning to realize that she and Enid may be safer outside. She looked back over at Jessie. A part of her was worried that the answer wouldn’t stay between them; what if Deanna wanted to gauge her reaction? 

“It’s beautiful, really.” Ava answered honestly, but keeping it vague.

Seeing that Ava’s words were all she was going to get, Jessie decided to switch gears. She gestured to Ava’s hair, her brown locks practically resting on her lower back.

“You know, I used to cut hair,” Ava raised her brows as Jessie continued. “I could give you a trim, if you want.”

Ava ran a hand through her hair. While on the road, getting it trimmed wasn’t exactly a priority for her or Enid. However, if they were going to leave the community, it would be nice not to worry about a Walker, or person, getting a hold of it. 

 The answer was the easiest Ava gave.

* * *

 

Ava sat in a chair in front of the sink, giving Jessie easy access to wet her locks before snipping away with scissors she had tucked in her belt. Ava was surprised at how much she spoke; Jessie had a way of making conversation flow easily. They chatted about what they did before the dead started walking—Jessie was a hairdresser, and Ava could tell she got a kick out of her job as an online journalist. The only time the conversation hit a lull was when Ava mentioned Pete. Jessie explained how he was a man with a “short temper”. The phrase made a shiver go down Ava’s spine. 

Jessie brightened up when Ava asked her about her kids—Ron and Sam—as well as their life in Alexandria. She spoke how their life was as carefree as it could get in this world. She made it sound appealing, but Ava had to remember that she didn’t know anything else. 

“There you are,” Jessie smiled, running her fingers through Ava’s hair. “I hope I didn’t make it too short.”

Ava slightly bent down to catch her reflection in the toaster. Her hair now stopped just a bit above her shoulders. She felt lighter, as if her hair was carrying the weight of the world. Running her fingers through it, Ava couldn’t help but laugh.

“It’s perfect, thanks.” She complimented as Jessie dusted the hair off her shoulders. “Funny how a haircut can just make you feel better.”

“Please tell Ron that when you meet him,” Jessie playfully scoffed. “The boy acts like I’m chopping his arm off every few weeks.”

Ava was about to add how Enid was the same way back in the day, but never got the chance when the sound of feet padding down the stairs entered the room. Wrapped in an over-sized robe, Enid turned the corner to enter the kitchen.

“Is there a washer and dryer in here? My clothes are—.”

Enid immediately stopped talking when she saw that Ava wasn’t alone. Ava noticed how Enid’s small smile instantly dropped at the sight of a new person—a stranger. Ava stood up from her chair, hoping to defuse the suddenly awkward situation. 

“Enid, this is Jessie,” Ava introduced as Jessie smiled and waved. “She brought us some clean clothes and other stuff.”

The room was silent as Ava watched Enid, waiting for any kind of response. The younger girl kept her eyes trained on the ground, as if worried that looking directly at Jessie would turn her to stone. Jessie cleared her throat before stepping forward.

 “It’s nice to meet you, Enid.”

Ava crossed her arms, keeping her gaze on Enid as she waited for her little sister to return the greeting. Enid simply nodded, her eyes now looking at Ava, the older sister resisting the urge to roll her own orbs. She expected Enid to be weary, but Ava didn’t expect to be obvious of her feelings. Keeping her expression light, Jessie pointed to the door.

 “I better check on Sam, make sure Ron isn’t killing him.” She half-joked before turning to Ava. “Let me know if you need anything, it was nice meeting you two.”

“You too,” Ava smiled. “And thank you for everything.”

Ava sent Jessie a look of apology, a silent plea for her not to take Enid’s behavior personally. Jessie smiled, silently waving it off before showing herself out. The woman had two boys, making Ava comfortable in believing that she was used to teenage attitude. When the door closed, Ava’s smile disappeared from her face.

“Well, that was fucking rude.”

Enid scoffed as she made her way to the living room. Ava clenched her jaw as she watched her sister dig through the contents, pulling out a pair of jeans and a red plaid.

“You want to tell me why you decided to lay all your cards out like that?” Ava asked, feeling herself grow angry.

“Do you want to tell me why you just let a stranger in?" Enid turned to her sister. “How can you trust her?”

 “Trust me, none of these people are threats,” It was Ava’s turn to scoff. “Most of them have been behind these walls since the beginning.”

Even if any of these people had the audacity to come for Ava and Enid, the eldest would make sure that they were the only two standing. However, leave it to Enid to not see the advantage they had due to Alexandria’s misfortune.

“Their incompetence makes them a big threat,” Enid pointed out. “I know that because _you_ taught me that.”

Now Ava knew how her mom felt when Ava would throw her words back in her face. Ava had told Deanna the same when they had their interview. Looking at Enid, Ava could tell that the girl was already planning their departure, and her next words only confirmed her suspicions.

“We’d be safer out there.”

Ava pursed her lips. She understood where Enid was coming from, mainly because she was there herself, but the girl hadn’t even had a chance to experience Alexandria yet. Ava was still at a loss if she wanted them to stay—she needed more time to digest what life in Alexandria was like. Maybe Enid would be more open to staying once she was out in their world, or even after she met Deanna.

“Ten days; that’s how long your stitches have to be in,” Ava pointed at Enid’s injured arm. “During that time, we’ll check out the place and go from there.”

Enid narrowed her eyes. “And if we don’t like what we see?”

“We leave.”

The room descended into silence, but the tension was gone as Enid gave a quiet nod. Ava gave a small smile of relief. She was glad that Enid was willing to give the community a shot—even if it was forced upon her.

“Good,” Ava grinned, gesturing to the clothes in Enid’s arm. “Get dressed and we’ll search for food. I’m starving.”

Enid gave her own small smile. “Me too.”

The younger girl made her way towards the stairs, but instead of ascending them, Enid turned to Ava.

“Nice haircut,” Her voice was quiet. “You look like you did…before.”

Ava ran her hand through her locks. She noticed how Enid kept glancing at her when Jessie was in the house. She thought it was out of nerves, but perhaps she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Ava took in Enid’s own long hair; the locks just stopped at her bottom. She gave Enid a good-nature smile.

“You know, Jessie can give you a cut too,” Ava volunteered. “It’ll come in handy if we go back out.”

Enid laughed before running upwards. “Hell no.”

“And to think, I missed you when you were asleep.” Ava called upstairs, her voice laced with teasing.

“We both know you can’t live without me!”

Although Enid’s response was meant to be humorous, Ava knew that it was the truth. And it was this truth that made a small part of Ava’s mind beg for Alexandria to be safer than on the surface. 

* * *

 

Despite the curious stares from the neighbors, Ava was relieved that the people of Alexandria were keeping their distance from herself and Enid as they walked towards the Pantry. After Enid’s interaction, or lack thereof, with Jessie, Ava wasn’t looking forward to the next meet and greet. However, while Enid seemed to keep a permanent scowl on her face, Ava made sure to shoot some of the prying neighbors a small smile. Luckily, a few of the residents mirrored the gesture, making a weight on Ava’s chest slightly lift.

The last thing Ava needed was to get kicked out for being considered a psychopath before Enid had the chance to heal up.

“Try-hard.” Enid spoke low, her tone mocking.

Ava gave her a slight nudge. “Better than not trying at all.”

Enid didn’t respond, and Ava considered it a win.

The Pantry was in another house, the garage door opened to reveal shelves of jars, cans, and bags of food and supplies. From her spot at the entryway, Ava could peak through the door that led into the home, catching a glimpse of even more supplies. She could've sworn that she saw a rifle. Ava then turned to Enid, the girl slightly slack-jawed at the amount of stuff before them. Ava was having trouble believing the sight as well. The last time they saw this much stuff in one place was at the beginning of the end.

 “Ava, holy shit.”

Enid’s quiet excitement snapped Ava out of her thoughts, and she watched as Enid made a beeline to a shelf. A large smile graced Enid’s face as she held out a box, the contents making Ava let out a laugh.

“We can have anything, and you chose Cheez-Its?”

Enid feigned a hurt expression. “It’s one of the major food groups.”

“I second that.”

Ava was expecting to see Jessie, but instead was greeted by a stout woman in glasses. Her black hair was swept up in a ponytail, her smile bright as she took in the pair in front of her. Sweetness practically radiated off of her. She glanced down at the clipboard in her hands.

“You must be Ava and Enid,” She then looked up. “I’m Olivia. I keep track of the rations and the armory.”

Ava raised her brows. Were they already on a list? Deanna truly did work fast, and thought highly of her community enough to think that Ava and Enid were staying. However, the fact that the armory was close made all of Ava’s senses go up—and from the look Enid was giving her, Ava knew she wasn’t the only one.

“Ava, Enid.” Ava smiled, pointing from herself to Enid. “It’s nice to meet you, Olivia.”

Olivia nodded, her smile never wavering. Unlike Deanna’s, Ava could tell it was more genuine than calculating. The woman walked further into the garage before coming back with a box; as she got closer, Ava could see multiple food products and packaging poking out of the top.

“Jessie told me you guys would be visiting soon, so we prepared a little welcome basket.” She handed it to Ava, before looking at Enid. “There aren’t any Cheez-Its in there, but feel free to add them.”

Enid hesitated, but after receiving a nod from Ava, she took out a packet of the snack and placed it in the basket. Olivia watched as Enid returned to Ava’s side, her arms crossed in a protective fashion. Ava stared down at the contents, the hefty supply filling her with joy as well as a twinge of anxiety.

“You just…give these away?” Ava asked slowly, as if trying to digest the luxury.

“We have more than enough for everyone,” Olivia explained. “Aiden takes a group out to scavenge about every two weeks.”

Every two weeks? While they were on their own, Ava and Enid were constantly looking for supplies and food to keep them alive. The schedule Alexandria had felt infrequent, and Ava wondered how with so many people they were able to keep it. However, another question burned in her mind.

“And the scavengers get their weapons, right?”

Olivia nodded, “Anyone who’s job has them growing outside the walls checks out a weapon.”

 Ava quirked her lips in recognition. If they decided to stay, Ava hoped that she made a good enough impression to get that kind of job. She felt like she would go nuts if she was on Pantry duty.

“Well, thanks for the food.”

They began to walk away when Olivia called. “You have the fixings in there for a good casserole!”

Out of view, Enid rolled her eyes, Ava turned around, sending Olivia another smile.

“I’ll, uh, keep that in mind!”

Olivia gave a mock salute, and Ava merely nodded in response. Ava and Enid began walking a little faster down the street. Ava hated to admit it, but even that little bit of socializing was exhausting. Enid looked up at her sister.

“A casserole?” She shook her head. “Where the hell are we?”

“Just keep walking.”

* * *

 

The basket did have the fixings for a casserole, but Ava also noticed that it had pancake mix and even sausage links.

“Breakfast for dinner?” Enid asked, a twinge of hope in her voice as she leaned over the counter. 

Ava playfully scoffed. “Do you even have to ask?”

It was a tradition their Dad started. After he retired from the EMT life, he became a Stay-At-Home Dad while their Mother worked double shifts. Since she wouldn’t come home until after dark, he was put in charge of making dinner for Enid. Considering he only knew how to grill, and how to make a mean breakfast, the options were limited. Seeing that Enid couldn’t eat pancakes and waffles every night, he designated Fridays to be the ultimate ‘Breakfast for Dinner’ night. Although Ava was already away at college, she often came home on Friday nights to share in the tradition.

As the two girls made the dinner in their new kitchen—laughing over old memories and singing the songs they used to belt in their rooms—Ava could feel a slight weight lift from her shoulders. While they talked over dinner, Ava realized this was the most peaceful night either of them have had in a long time. It was also the first time Ava heard Enid speak about their parents in such a light way.

Ava hoped it would last.

After cleaning up, Ava began to set the living room up for bedtime. Although she told Enid she could sleep in a bed upstairs while Ava kept watch, Enid wouldn’t have any of it.

“If you sleep on the ground, I do too.”

It would’ve been sweet if it wasn’t so infuriating.

Enid brought down her own comforter and pillows, adding them to the mix. They were almost done when a knock on the door sounded, Enid stiffening at the noise. Ava put a hand out to her.

“I got it, be cool.”

Padding over to the door, Ava was surprised to see Deanna standing in the threshold. The porch light illuminated her worried expression at seeing Ava clad in basketball shorts and a tank top.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you?”

Ava shook her head. “We were just getting ready to settle in.”

Deanna trained her head, a smile overtaking her face when she saw Enid prepping the pillows on the floor. The girl met Deanna’s gaze, the smallest of smiles gracing her own face. Ava resisted the urge to sigh in relief; she would let Enid be rude and quiet to anyone else, but Deanna was someone they needed to keep in their good graces. No matter what happened.

“Is this Enid?”

“Yes, it is.” Ava smiled brightly. “Enid, this is Deanna. She runs Alexandria.”

Enid stepped forward, but didn’t make her way to the door. She was still weary of strangers, especially ones that held power. Ava felt a swell of pride in her belly. She taught her well.

“Thank you, for letting us in.”

 “It’s good to see you doing so well, you gave all of us quite a fright.” Deanna smiled before glancing between Ava and Enid. “If you’re up for it, I’d love to sit down and talk to you tomorrow.”

Enid glanced at Ava. The older sister had told Enid about the interview; how Deanna wanted to gauge their sanity while also seeing if they were a good fit for Alexandria. It was inevitable that Enid would be asked, but Ava still didn’t like the idea of leaving her alone. Not when she just woke up. Enid, however, displayed fearlessness.

“That’ll be fine.”  

“Good, I’ll see you at noon.”

Deanna then took in the bed items on the ground, and Ava could see a glimmer of amusement in her eyes.

“Staying close,” Deanna looked around the room before back up at Ava, “Smart.”

Ava looked down. She wanted to feel safe in a bed, for Enid to be able to enjoy a mattress the way she did before everything, but it was too risky. After everything they’ve been through, they needed to stay alert and together.

“We’ll get there.” Ava didn’t know if she was talking to Deanna or herself.

Deanna nodded, “Take your time.”

 The leader wished the two girls a good night’s sleep before descending the porch steps, off to spend the rest of the night with her own family. Ava closed the door and instantly locked it, drawing the shades. Enid got under the covers, but stayed sitting up as she watched Ava take precautions.

“She seemed…” Enid trailed off, unable to find the words.

“Nice?” Ava tried to complete as she shut the light off.

Enid shook her head. “Normal.”

Ava let out a small huff of laughter as she climbed into the makeshift bed next to Enid. “Both are very uncommon these days.”

Enid made room for Ava, the two laying down with a sigh. Despite sleeping ever since they went through the gates, Enid knocked out like a light, and Ava softly giggled as the youngest nuzzled into her chest. Wrapping her arms around Enid, Ava kept her eyes trained on the door, daring anyone to come in and try to hurt them.

It was a sleepless night for her.


	5. Adjusting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls attend a party and find out more about life inside the walls.

The first couple of days in Alexandria were slow.

Ava and Enid weren’t used to having time to kill, not when their lives just recently consisted of constant running. Ava found herself working out, using a metal bar in the garage as a pull-up bar while Enid mirrored her sister's fitness by stretching. They made jokes and wagers, competing to see who could do the most push-ups and laughing when Ava pretended to pass out. It was fun, but also a reminder that they had to stay fit. Ava wanted them to stay sharp, no matter what they chose to do.

Aaron and Eric caught the two jogging around the neighborhood one day, inviting them inside for lemonade. Enid sent Ava a look, quietly begging her to make up an excuse, but the older girl smiled and accepted the invitation.

“They’re normal, you’ll like them.” Ava whispered as they walked towards the house.

Much like Denise, they were easy to talk to—mainly because they knew what it was like outside. At the end of the gathering, Ava could tell Enid felt at ease with them. The quartet met up for lunch the next day as well as the following two days after.

 Enid had her meeting with Deanna; when asked how it went, the youngest just shrugged and muttered a “she’s nice” before napping on the couch. Knowing he was close to the leader, Ava asked Aaron for any insight to the meeting. According to him, Deanna didn’t have much to say about the interview either, except for calling Enid a “bright girl”.

“She’s under eighteen, so she won’t be given a job.” Aaron explained from his spot next to Ava on his porch. “That might be why Deanna isn’t giving her much though.”

Ava kept her gaze on Enid. She sat in the gazebo across the street, her nose in a book that Eric loaned to her. It was the most at peace Ava had seen her, the sun highlighting her soft features and making her brown hair appear lighter. The idea that someone could meet Enid and never think about her again seemed impossible to Ava.

She pursed her lips. Ava had her own interview with Deanna almost four days ago, and she still hadn’t heard anything about her own assignment.

“What about me?” Ava asked. “Should I be worried that I haven’t heard anything?”

Aaron turned to face Ava, a sly grin on his face. “ _Are_ you worried?”

Ava didn’t keep it a secret from him that she wasn’t afraid of the residents, or Deanna. Aaron didn’t blame her; Ava had been through enough that Aaron knew not to get on her bad side. However, after spending a few days with her, Aaron hoped that Ava knew that she wasn’t a monster. She was kinder than she wanted to admit.

Yet, that didn’t stop Ava from giving him a slight smirk of her own.

“Hell no.”

* * *

 

“Please don’t make me go.”

“I’m making you go.”

Like the teenager she is, Enid let out a loud groan. Ava ignored her disapproval as she continued to brush out her hair, pulling Enid’s locks up into a ponytail. She may have pulled harder than needed due to her own frustrations. Ava didn’t care; Enid had been annoying her ever since Jessie invited them to the dinner party at her house tonight.

It happened while they were in the Doctor’s quarters, Denise doing a quick check up on Enid’s stitches. Although she would be getting them off in three days, the nurse wanted to be sure that they were clean and doing what was needed. As always, Enid remained silent as Ava chatted lightly with Denise; she forgot how much fun Denise was to talk to. She offered a sense of lightness that Ava missed. While Denise was recounting her favorite ‘F.R.I.E.N.D.S.’ episode, Jessie made an appearance.

“Oh hey, Jessie.” Denise greeted with a smile. “If you’re looking for Pete, you just missed him.”

“The man is already home, helping me with tonight,” Jessie smiled before turning to Ava and Enid. “Which is why I’m here. I’m hosting a dinner party tonight, and I thought you two would like to come.”

Ava’s brows raised slightly. Jessie had invited them to dinner before, but Ava assumed that it would only be them and her family. She wasn’t expecting a full party. As if sensing Ava’s anxiety, and noticing Enid’s own look of panic, Jessie decided to do a bit more coaxing.

“It’ll give you a chance to meet everyone in one place,” She put on a joking air, “And, not to brag, but my chicken pot-pie is legendary.”

Denise paused in cleaning Enid’s stitches with a gasp. “She’s right. It’s awesome.”

Ava couldn’t help but smile at Denise’s comment before thinking once more. It would be a good opportunity to meet the people that were so afraid to approach them. If things got too overwhelming, they could always slip out without anyone noticing. Ava did her best not to glance at Enid, avoiding her pleading gaze. She shrugged.

“Well, how can I say no to chicken pot-pie?”

Needless to say, Enid grumbled all the way home and then some. The only time Ava got peace was while she was in the shower and changing into the blue sundress she found in the closet. After finishing Enid’s hair, Ava picked up a white blouse and another dress—this one white.

“Choose.”

Enid crossed her arms. “Neither.”

“Enid.”

“Look, you may be comfortable playing dress up, but I’m not.” Enid’s voice rose in volume. “We’re just supposed to pretend like everything is normal?”

Ava sighed before putting the clothing back in the closet. It was strange; just a few days ago, they were fighting for survival. Now, they were invited to a _dinner party_. It felt like a problem in another life. The shock of it all hit Ava in the shower, and she fought to urge to cry as she thought of the past. She wished the world made sense again, but this is what they had to do. She sat next to Enid on the bed, pulling at the hem of her dress.

“It’s weird, I know.” Ava agreed, and Enid breathed out in relief. “But we’ll get a better feel of the community if we’re in the thick of it. Think of it as pure research, like with the Walkers.”  

The tension in Enid’s shoulders disappeared at her words. When they wanted to loot a store that seemed to be crawling with Walkers, Ava and Enid would spend a day watching the dead from a distance. Ava said that it was a good way to understand their walk patterns, to know where a good entrance and exit would be. Sadly, unlike Walkers, Enid had to talk to people to get a read on them.  

“I’m not wearing a dress.” Enid broke the silence, her tone firm.

Ava’s face instantly lit up, wrapping her sister in a hug. “It’ll be good, I promise.”

Planting a kiss on Enid’s forehead, Ava let the girl go to get ready. She watched as she took the blouse and the pair of black dress pants she had found. Ava smirked, her tone laced with joking as she spoke.

“You sure you don’t want the dress? Jessie has a son your age…”

“Don’t push it.”

* * *

 

With her focus on coaxing Enid, Ava forgot one important detail; parties were always uncomfortable. The door was propped open, allowing the girls to walk in on their own. Enid hovered close to Ava, following her lead. If only Ava had a lead to go on.

“Ava, Enid!”

Oh, thank god.

Jessie made a beeline to the girls, Pete in tow with a beer in his hand. It was the first time Ava saw him at ease, a smile on his face as he nodded at the pair. It was a bit unsettling, but Ava pinned his change of mood on the alcohol in his hands. Jessie smiled.

“I’m so glad you guys came,” Jessie smiled. “You two look gorgeous!”

Ava smiled, “Thanks for having us.”

“It’s good to see you, Enid.” Pete greeted the youngest. “Especially out of the hospital bed.”

Enid rocked back and forth on her heels, and Ava wished she could do something to help her sister feel more at ease. However, she knew the only way to do that would be to leave. For now, Ava put a comforting hand on her back, the touch making Enid stop her rocking.

“It’s nice to be out of it.” Enid responded, voice low.

“I don’t know if Ava told you, but I have a son your age,” Ava resisted the urge to giggle as Jesse nodded towards the living room. “He and a few other kids are hanging out. If you want, I can introduce you?”

An air of hope seemed to surround the parents, and Ava wondered if they thought Enid would calm the two boys. Ava scoffed to herself, if only they knew. Ava looked down at Enid, offering her an encouraging smile. It was up to her if she wanted to go over there, but the kids of the community would be a good measure to see how the parents were. Enid pursed her lips, remembering why they were there; research.

“Uh, sure.” Enid nodded. “I would like that a lot, actually.”

Jessie grinned, putting an arm around Enid as she led her away. “They won't bite, I promise.”

Suddenly, Ava felt nervous. If the boys even thought about pushing her sister around, there would be hell to pay.

 “I’ll be right here, Enid.”

Enid turned to look at Ava, relaxing when the older girl sent her a wink. She nodded back before focusing on the path in front of her. Ava watched as Jessie played host, and let out a relieved breath when she saw Enid smile at the group. She would be okay, and if she wasn’t, Ava was right here.

“She’s a cute kid,” Pete’s voice made Ava reluctantly turn away from Enid. “You two look a lot alike.”

Ava didn’t respond, but she did cross her arms over her chest when she saw how Pete was examining her, as if wanting to memorize her form. It was off-putting, and too real for her to blame it on her paranoia. Her eyes scanned the room, hoping to find a familiar face to save her

“Where’s Denise?” Ava asked, doing her best to switch gears. “Pulling the late shift?”

“When one of us is away, the other has to be there.” Pete sighed. “It’s a shame too, she loves a good party…and a good dress.”

Alright, that was enough. Ava’s gaze settled on the kitchen, the island filled with different drinks. She pointed.

“I’m going to grab a drink.”

Pete lowered his beer. “I’ll help you.”

“No, I’m fine.”

“What kind of host would I be…”

“Ava!”

For the second time that night, a wave of relief rushed through Ava. Aaron came through the crowd, looking more like an angel than a man as he took the spot next to her.

“I thought I heard you,” Aaron spoke brightly. “You need to try the devil eggs.”

Without so much as a goodbye, Ava allowed herself to be whisked away by Aaron. She felt Pete’s eyes burn in her until they were out of view, the pair taking refuge in the crowded kitchen. Ava sent Aaron an appreciative grin.

“We just met, and you already saved my life twice.”

He chuckled. “You’ll find a way to repay me someday.”

Although it was a joke, Ava agreed. Aaron and Eric did Enid a great service, and Ava would be forever in their debt. She cleared her throat, as if making the heavy thoughts in her mind disappear for a night. When Aaron held up a bottle of wine, Ava nodded. She needed something to loosen her up.

“Does Jessie know that her husband is a bad flirt?” Ava asked, her tone light.

 “Pete gets a little too loose at these things.” Aaron shook his head in disgust. “Hasn’t done anything too bad though, except be a pig.”

Ava merely nodded as Aaron gently pushed a glass her way. She took a sip of the red wine, her belly instantly warming at the taste. Much like coffee, she didn’t realize how much she missed wine until it was in her body. Aaron grinned.

“Good?”

“Great, thanks.” She smiled before scanning the room, seeing no sign of Eric. “Going stag tonight?”

“Eric and I are going on another recruiting mission tomorrow, so he used the excuse of needing to rest.” Aaron explained, looking a bit disappointed. “Where’s Enid?”

Ava gestured to the living room. “Getting to know the locals.”

She smiled when she saw Aaron’s eyes light up. If they ended up leaving, Ava would miss seeing someone love Enid almost as much as she does.

“Ava, that’s great.” He sighed, his smile genuine. “Being around kids her age will be good for her.”

Ava finally found Enid. She was on the couch now, listening as one of the boys showed her a card trick. She was quiet, but smiling; a bit open, but still shut away. Ava took a sip of her wine.

“I hope so.”

* * *

 

Aaron was the perfect wing-man, ushering Ava from clique to clique. Everyone was nice enough, all welcoming her to the Community with smiles and promises to make plans. Ava was good with small talk for a bit, but then it came to a point when it was overwhelming; as if she had stamina meter and it was running low. At some points, Ava had to stop herself from yelling at the people for complaining about mundane things. Aaron seemed to sense her discomfort, and would politely excuse the pair of them. Ava was more than appreciative.

A bit too soon for Ava's taste, Aaron had to leave. He and Eric was setting out at dawn, hoping to find more people to bring in. Ava wished him a safe journey, then found herself a nice corner to stand in; a corner that gave her a perfect view of Enid without being obvious. Her little sister still was the quietest of the bunch, but did contribute to the conversation more often than not. The smile on her face filled Ava with warmth.

“Having fun?”

Ava glanced at Deanna, the shorter woman holding a plate of pot-pie. She gave her a smile of greeting before gesturing to Enid.

“Just enjoying the view.”

Deanna followed her gaze and smiled. “It’s lovely.”

It wasn’t long until a man joined their small duo. He was tall with glasses, and carried himself with kindness rather than ignorance. Deanna lit up at his presence.

“Ava, I want you to meet Reg, my husband.”

Ava turned to him as Reg offered a handshake. Hesitantly, Ava took it and participated in the gesture. Reg didn’t seem to mind.

“It’s an honor to meet you, Ava.” Reg greeted. “I saw the tape. We’re lucky to have someone like you on board.”

A ghost of a smile appeared on Ava’s face. On the tape, she was contradicting everything Deanna spoke. The idea that he wanted someone like that in the community gave her a bit of comfort; they weren’t against different thinkers.

“Alexandria is lucky to have you,” Ava mirrored. “That wall you built is…awesome.”

Reg chuckled at her choice of words, and Ava wished she didn’t have so much wine in her system. After a few more moments of light chat, Reg was called over by Jessie for help. Once again, it was just Ava and Deanna.

“Your community is filled with nice people,” Ava complimented, breaking the silence. “You should be proud.”

And she meant it. The Alexandrians were kind, and more open than Ava thought. They were harmless. However, the bad news was that they’re _harmless._ If the community were to come under attack, by walkers or people alike, Ava was quick to realize that they would be doomed. She refrained from telling Deanna her feelings—the last thing she needed was to blowup at a party.

“How would you like to provide for them?”

Ava looked down at Deanna, her brow raised before a look of realization crossed her features. Was she offering what Ava hoped?

“I know what your job is going to be,” Deanna announced. “Scavenger.”

She contained her smile, but Deanna could see the joy in her eyes. Much like Aaron, Deanna knew Ava wouldn’t be happy cooped up behind the walls. She needed to be outside. Deanna may not understand, but if it kept Ava and Enid with Alexandria, she was willing to try.

“You’ve been out there, you’ll know what to look for,” Deanna continued before grinning. “Does that seem like a good fit to you?”

“Yes,” Ava nodded a bit too quickly. “Thank you, really.”

Deanna put her glass out, waiting for Ava to clink. The younger woman obliged before taking a sip, smiling into the liquid. She would get her weapons back, she could go outside. The very fact that Deanna didn’t want to lock her away put a tick in the ‘Pro Alexandria’ box.

* * *

 

After another hour of chatting, and stuffing her face, Ava decided it was time to call it a night. She made her way over to Enid, the only kids left with her being the children of Jessie and Pete. The trio shared a Gameboy, taking turns racing creatures in go-carts. At the appearance of Ava, Enid instantly sat up on the couch, looking just as tired as Ava felt.

“Time to go, kid.” Ava smiled.

Enid nodded, turning to Ron. “Nice meeting you, guys.”

“You’re coming over tomorrow, right?”

Ava hid her smile at Ron’s tone of urgency. Someone was smitten for her sister.

“Uh, sure.”

The answer satisfied Ron, and the boy offered the pair a farewell. After thanking Jessie and Pete for hosting, the two girls walked into the crisp night air. Ava finally felt like she could breathe. Even though the party went well, socializing took more energy than it did before. Seeing that Enid was practically leaning on her as they made their way up the porch steps, Ava knew she wasn’t alone.

“Did you have fun?” Ava asked once they were inside.

“The kids seem normal. Clueless, but normal.” Enid yawned before nodding. “Yeah, uh, I think I did.”

“Good,” She smiled. “Thank you for tonight.”

Enid gave a tired smile back. She then looked over at the pile of blankets on the ground. Despite being here for a week, the pair still slept on the ground. However, Ava could sense a change.

“I’m going to sleep upstairs,” Enid pointed. “If that’s okay.”

Ava resisted the urge to kiss her. All she wanted was Enid to feel, and be, comfortable. Maybe she was warming up to Alexandria after all.

“Of course,” Ava responded as Enid made her way up the stairs. “Sleep tight.”

Enid stopped in the middle. “You’re sleeping in a bed too, right?”

Even from a distance, Ava could see the hope in Enid’s eyes. The younger girl never wanted Ava to settle for less, especially when she gave up everything for Enid. Ava pursed her lips.

“Yeah, I’ll be up there soon.”

Enid smiled before running up the stairs, ready for a night of rest. After making sure they were locked in, Ava went upstairs herself to change into sleepwear. She peeked into Enid’s room, surprised to see the girl already snoring away. Ava grinned before placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

She then passed the master bedroom, catching a glimpse of the queen-sized bed within it.

Ava slept on the couch that night.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Updates may be a bit slower now since I had all these chapters pre-written, but stay tuned!


	6. A Decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava and Enid continue getting to know the people of Alexandria. Ava makes a decision on their next move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! Hope you all enjoy(:

At noon, Enid reluctantly went back over to Jessie’s house to hang out with Ron and Sam. She tried to coax Ava into telling the family that she was ‘sick’, but since Pete was the Doctor, Ava informed her that she would be trading a day of leisure for a doctor’s visit.

“Get me in an hour.” Enid directed.

Ava didn’t look up from cleaning the dishes. “An hour and a half.”

“Deal.”

It was when Ava was done cleaning up when she realized that she was going to be alone for most of the day. Aaron and Eric were out on a recruiting mission, given no specific time to when they would return; or if they would be alone when they did so. She thought about visiting Denise, but after the uncomfortable interaction she had with Pete, Ava wasn’t in the mood to deal with him. After a few moments of pacing, Ava decided to take the afternoon to explore more of the community. She got a feel for the people last night, and it was now time to look over the land.

The day was hotter than usual, the streets bare as residents soaked up the generated air conditioning. Ava did wave at a young couple in the gazebo before rounding to the lake. Alexandria was peaceful, a piece of suburban paradise, but the nagging feeling in her stomach told Ava not to get too comfortable. It would never last. Ava walked up to the front gate. She put her hands on the chain-link fence, slightly pulling at it. Her fingers traced the scrim. Although they did have two people on watch, anyone could drive a truck right through the gates. Nothing would stop them from burning the community down.

“Heading out?”

Ava looked up to see a young man on the platform, his hands holding a rifle while his eyes remained downcast on her. For some reason, he looked familiar to Ava, but she didn’t think much of it. She was too busy drooling over the weapon in his grip. Was it bad that she missed shooting a gun?

“Well?” He asked again when she didn’t answer.

Ava shook her head. “Just…admiring it.”

“Do you want to come up?” He asked, gesturing to the platform under his feet. “You’ll really admire the view.”

The question surprised her. Ava assumed that Deanna would have strict rules on who could be at the wall, especially when it came to newbies. However, Ava couldn’t let the opportunity pass. She wanted to see just how far the people on watch could see; how much time they had to clock and take out a threat. Nodding, she scaled the ladder. Ava ignored the man’s hand; she was tired of being pitied and got up on the platform with ease.  It wasn’t until she was standing in front of the man when she figured out why she recognized him.

“You’re Deanna’s son.”

He gave a sheepish smile before nodding. “Spencer.”

Spencer Monroe. He was the one who told Ava that Enid woke up. No wonder why she forgot his name; it was an emotional moment. Luckily, he seemed to understand.

“I didn’t see you at Jessie’s last night.” Ava pointed out, remembering how both of his parents were present.

“I was here, keeping watch.” Spencer chuckled. “Though, if I knew you were going, I would have asked Aiden to cover for me.”

Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes. With all the extra time Alexandria gave people, this boy couldn’t come up with a better line? It had been awhile since she was given a bad pick-up line, especially one where the giver is confident with it. She couldn’t fight the scoff that escaped her throat.

“Smooth.”

“I tired,” Spencer shrugged. “Do I at least get points for effort?”

The worst part of it all was that Ava still found herself slightly flustered by his antics. She pinned it on the fact that she hadn’t been with a man since before the Apocalypse. Ava gestured to the rifle in his hands, more interested with the scope than the actual gun.

“If you let me see that, I’ll give you a fresh start.”

Spencer’s brows raised slightly at the offer as he looked down at his weapon. He then glanced up at Ava, holding the gun out to her only to bring it back to his body. Seeing him handle a gun so careless made Ava slightly nervous, but she swallowed her worry.

“You’re not going to shoot me, are you?” He asked with a teasing tone of voice.

Ava couldn’t help herself as she smirked. “Guess you’re going have to take a risk.”

When Spencer handed the rifle over to her, Ava made a mental note to use her ‘feminine wiles’ more often; especially with boys her age. Ava raised the gun and looked through the scope, nodding to herself. She could see a good way down the road; if they had the right people on watch, Alexandria would be able to clock a threat about fifteen minutes before they hit. However, that wouldn’t do much for their defenseless community.

The gurgling of a Walker made Ava position the gun to her left. Through the scope, she watched as a member of the dead limped out of the grass. The corner of her mouth raised in a slight smile.

“Here, I’ll take care--”

Spencer’s last words were swallowed by the sound of a bullet entering the Walker’s head; right between the eyes, the dead girl fell to the ground. Once she looked up from the scope, Spencer’s wide eyes greeted her. He gestured towards her form.

“Or, you got it.”

Ava smiled, handing the weapon back to him. “Thanks for the refresher.”

With one last nod from Spencer, Ava bent down to descend the ladder. Before she climbed down, he stopped her.

“Are you a good teacher?”

Ava narrowed her eyes in confusion. Spencer chuckled before shaking his head.

“I mean, would you be good at helping me with my aim?” He explained, “It still takes me about three shots to get a dead one down.”

Ava’s eyes widened at that. He was one of the first defenses Alexandria has, and it took him three bullets to kill a Walker? She didn’t even want to know how he would handle a living person. Apparently, that wasn’t a concern here. Ava pursed her lips. Even if Spencer had ulterior motives, at least Ava would be doing the community a service.

“I’ll do my best.”

Spencer grinned. “That’s all I ask.”

Ava smiled back, giving him a nod of goodbye before descending the ladder back to the concrete. She ignored the gaze on her back, and instead focused on how it felt to have a weapon in her hands again. It felt good, but Ava wished it didn't. 

* * *

 

Over the next few days, Ava found herself developing a routine.

Each morning started with Ava rolling off the couch and dragging herself up the stairs before Enid woke up. The younger sister believed that Ava was sleeping in the master bedroom, but Ava couldn’t bring herself to do it. Sometimes she would start in the bed that felt like a marshmallow, but sleep only came when she was on the sticky leather of the couch.  It also helped that she had a kitchen knife under the cushions. Ava was thrilled that Enid was comfortable enough to sleep in a bed, and she didn’t want her own concern to ruin Enid’s progress.

However, the more Ava thought about it, she didn’t know _how_ much progress Enid was making. She wasn’t exactly having the best time at Ron and Sam’s; Jessie later told her that Enid didn’t talk much while she was there. Ava found it odd considering that Enid was all smiles at the party; when Ava brought it up to Enid, the sister blamed it on exhaustion. Ava accepted the explanation, for now.

Aaron and Eric were still gone, but Denise was quick to keep the girls company. She brought oatmeal to them in the morning, and Ava joined her into the Doctor’s office at night. Enid came as well, but only to be close to Ava. She did speak to Denise, Ava could tell Enid liked her, but even then she was more of a spectator. Denise even tried to have her join the conversation by asking Enid questions, but was quickly shut down by Enid’s silent hums and nods. Ava's anxiety rose, and she needed advice from one of the only people she trusted.

“I’m worried that she’s freezing everyone out.” Ava admitted to Denise when Enid went home early.

“She’ll get there,” Denise reassured. “Especially when she has a sister like you.”

Ava hoped that would be enough.

The early afternoons were spent with Spencer outside the walls. Ava taught him to aim with glass bottles; he wasn’t half bad, but still not good enough to be Alexandria’s first line of defense. Either way, he was good company to keep; Ava found herself loving his sense of humor and easy-going style. In a world like this, it was nice to get lost with someone who didn’t carry much trauma. Being with Spencer reminded her of what life was like before, and she decided to use that to her advantage.

“So, are you two…” Enid trailed off one night.

“God, Enid,” Ava rolled her eyes. “I’m just helping him learn how to shoot.”

“That’s what it’s called now?”

Ava threw a piece of carrot at her.

She didn’t need to explain herself to Enid. Helping Spencer out meant she had a chance to go beyond the wall. Aiden and Deanna haven't called for a supply run yet and killing any Walkers that got too close to the gunfire prepared her for when she had to go out. The easy kills also gave her a sense of invigoration.

It was sick, but Ava didn’t care. This was who she was.

* * *

 

“Well, Enid, you’re as good as new.”

Ava smiled as she watched Pete remove the last of Enid’s stitches. The younger girl smiled slightly as she moved her arm freely, the only remnants of the incident being a scar down her forearm. When she saw Enid staring at the injury, her eyes holding disgust and an expression of annoyance, Ava spoke up.

“No one is going to mess with you when they see that.”

Enid scoffed. “As long as I don’t tell them I got it from a dog.”

“I don’t know,” Ava pretended to ‘tsk’. “Fighting off a wild animal is still pretty badass.”

Especially to the people here, Ava finished the statement in her mind as to not offend Pete or Denise. Besides, she would need to be kinder to Alexandria now that they were staying. Ava came to the decision last night where most of her brilliant ideas used to come from: in the shower. They were out there for a long time, almost too long, and Ava could already see the affect it had on Enid. Ava didn’t want the new world to destroy her sister, she wanted Enid to have some form of a life in it. The sisters deserved a break, and Alexandria felt like a win.

Coming to the decision was easy, it was telling Enid that was hard.

Ava decided to wait until after dinner, Enid washing the dishes while Ava locked down the house for the night; just because she decided to stay in Alexandria doesn’t mean she trusts them. They were still incompetent.

“When are we leaving?”

The question made Ava trip over herself. Enid’s gaze was hard as she watched Ava fold a blanket on the couch. It was clear Enid knew what was coming, but that didn’t make Ava’s statement hurt any less.

“We aren’t.”

 Enid dropped the plate in the sink with a crash. Ava closed her eyes, preparing for the battle ahead.

“You said that we’d leave after I healed up,” She put her arm over the counter. “Guess what? I’m healed!”

Enid’s annoyance was evident in her tone. Ava would not be made the bad guy; she wasn’t going back on her word. She weighed their options, and Alexandria was better than going back to nothing.

“I said that we’d leave if we didn’t like what we saw,” Ava walked forward, stopping in front of the counter. “Food, shelter, running water; this place has everything, Enid.”

“Except safety.”

A few days ago, Ava thought the same. However, just because they were inept in defending themselves, didn’t mean Ava was going to let herself, and Enid, become just as useless. If anything did happen to Alexandria, Ava would make sure it was everyone for themselves.

“They aren’t safe, but we are.” Ava pointed out. “If something happens, we’ll fight for each other.”

Silence filled the room, and Ava could practically see the wheels turning in Enid’s head as she tried to come up with another excuse. The older sister simply narrowed her eyes, daring Enid to come up with something; Ava would squash it.

“We need to be out there,” Enid finally spoke up. “We belong out there!”

It was what Ava feared. They truly have been out there for too long, Enid seemed to thrive on watching the world die. She couldn’t bear to see the living, to see what made the world great; light and hope. Ava wished she could communicate this to Enid, but her frustrations got the best of her.

“Alright, I’m invoking adult power now,” Ava put her hands on the counter and leaned forward, the sudden lack of space making Enid lean back. “We’re staying here, and you’ll either learn to love it or at least get _really_  good at pretending to. Conversation over.”

The air in the house was tense. Ava prepared for Enid to fight back, for them to have a fight that blew the ones they had as kids out of the water. However, the only sound that came out of Enid’s body was a loud huff of air from the nose. With that, the youngest bounded up the stairs, the slam of her bedroom door rocking the entire house.

Ava ran her hands down her tired face. She hated when winning felt like losing.


	7. Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava takes a leap and meets a new face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some...stuff happens :). Hope you guys enjoy!

Enid didn’t talk to Ava. Hell, she didn’t speak to anyone the days following their confrontation in the kitchen.

Ava tried to reach out, but Enid was having none of it. The girl would brush past her sister and leave the house without a word, not even giving Ava an inkling on where she was going. Jessie later told Ava that Enid spent most of the day in Ron’s room, reading comic books and playing video games—silently.  The knowledge filled Ava with relief, but only made her wonder where Enid spent the rest of her time. She didn’t come home until sunset, usually holding a book as she stomped up the stairs.

The nagging feeling in the back of Ava’s mind told her that Enid was going outside the walls. Deanna made it clear that leaving Alexandria without permission was impossible; but Ava knew her sister. It was all the youngest wanted, and if she found a way to sneak out without being seen, she would take it. Ava understood what Enid was feeling, because she felt it too. It was the reason she agreed to help Spencer, and why she was thrilled to be part of the scavenging crew. The sisters needed to be out there, but only Ava realized that a taste of it was all she desired. It was nice to have somewhere to go every night; a house that Ava hoped would turn into a home.

If only Enid was willing to try.

“Growing pains are rough,” Spencer tried to relate. “Aiden was unbearable between the ages of sixteen and eighteen.”

Ava shook her head at Spencer’s words, a soft smile playing on her lips. They were finishing another lesson and making their way back to the gate when she asked him for any advice; he was an older brother himself, and maybe he would know how to break down the walls of a younger sibling.

“Enid’s been upset with me before, but she’s never cut me off like this.” Ava explained, “Especially after we were on our own.”

“You just have to give her space,” Spencer shrugged. “Let her go through this by herself.”

Ava crossed her arms over her chest. After spending more than a year together in the dying world, the concept of ‘space’ was foreign to her. She often forget that she could afford to give Enid time alone, time away from her prying eyes and assurances. Seeing how Enid has grown up so quickly, it was easy to forget that she’s just a teenager; in the world before, this was normal. This _is_ normal, and yet all Ava wanted to do was hold her.

Her thoughts were interrupted when Spencer suddenly paused in walking, taking in the sights of the forest green around him. The morning sun shone through the leaves, and seemed to illuminate him in light.

“You good?” Ava asked.

“Being outside the walls when the world is like this,” Spencer gestured around him. “I get where Enid is coming from, you know?’

Ava wanted to tell him that Enid didn’t miss the scenery, it was the adrenaline rush. The feeling of running every moment, and letting the world do what she thought it was meant to do: die. However, Ava knew Spencer wouldn’t understand. She kept it light as she shrugged.

“It’s not bad.”

Spencer raised his eyebrows, as if challenging Ava’s statement. The woman then looked around, and even she couldn’t deny that he was right. Unlike Spencer, it wasn’t the sights that made Ava look in awe, but the sounds. For once, it was quiet; no growls of the dead, allowing the rustling of leaves to be the soundtrack. Ava was sure she had never heard anything so beautiful. Her gaze landed on Spencer, the _‘well?’_ look on his face making Ava giggle.

“Alright, it’s awesome.”

“I know you want to help Enid, but you can’t kill yourself over it,” He walked closer to her, “You need to take a breath and just know that whatever will be will be.”

Ava didn’t move when he stopped right in front of her. Three weeks ago, she would have backed up, not wanting to be close to anyone who wasn’t Enid. Yet, there was something about Spencer that made Ava not want to move. That made her want to believe that his words were true.

They kissed for the first time in that forest.

* * *

Ava didn’t know what came over her. What started as a simple kiss ended with Ava against a tree, receiving a source of pleasure she had no idea she missed. It was dangerous, foolish, stupid—and she didn’t care. For once, Ava could turn her mind off and do something she enjoyed. Something she didn’t need to think about. For once, Ava could be selfish.

She reveled in her choices as the pair walked up to the gate. She swallowed the urge to laugh as Spencer called up to the guards, his voice holding a tone of bounce that Ava had never heard before. Boys were easy to please, the thought confirmed as they walked inside Alexandria. Spencer turned to her, leaning down slightly to whisper in her ear. She didn’t miss the grin on his face.

“If you ever need to get your mind off something, you know where to find me.”

As she watched him switch guard shifts, Ava had a feeling she would be taking that offer. It was a relief to her that Spencer didn’t dig deep into the interaction; they both wanted an escape, and now they had an outlet to receive it. It was a solution where everyone benefits, and Ava was due for one of those.

Ava adjusted her lopsided shirt as she ascended the steps of her porch. Opening the door, Ava nearly tripped on her feet at the sight. She expected to be alone; for Enid to have already made her speedy escape to Jessie’s house. Instead, Enid was on the couch, but not alone. Seated next to her was Aaron, the man offering a small wave while Deanna nodded from her position on the recliner across from the pair. From her time outside the walls, Ava has seen some weird things, but this scene seemed to beat everything.

“Good morning?” She greeted awkwardly.

“And morning to you,” Deanna grinned. “Sorry to barge in.”

Ava sent Enid a questioning look, the younger girl raising her brows slightly in response. Enid looked just as confused as Ava felt, and that was never good. Despite every alarm in her brain going off, Ava did her best to play it cool. 

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Ava shook her head as she closed the door. “What’s going on?”

Deanna turned to Aaron, nodding at him. It was all the permission he needed to start speaking.

“Eric and I found a group, a _big_ group, fifteen people.”

The information poured out of Aaron so quickly that it took Ava moment to process it. They allowed fifteen people into Alexandria? It was one thing to take Enid and Ava, but the idea of taking in fifteen strangers was almost too blissfully ignorant—even by Alexandria’s standards. Enid’s gaze locked onto Ava, the older sister knowing that her younger counterpart was having the same exact thought. Ava turned back to Aaron, one question on her mind.

“How long have they been out there?” 

The man sighed. “A long time.”

It was only getting worse with each new nugget of information Aaron revealed. Ava began to wonder why they thought sharing this information with her—and Enid—was important. Deanna seemed to sense the sudden tension in the room.

“They can be big assets to the community, help it thrive.”

Ava resisted the urge to scoff at Deanna’s statement. She respected the leader, but Ava could tell she had no idea how lucky she was that Ava decided to stay. She and Enid could have taken their food, ammo, anything they needed before leaving for good. If the group of fifteen were out there for a ‘long time’, Ava had a feeling they were thinking of the same plan. Ava crossed her arms.

“Or they could destroy it, rob you blind.”

“Which is why I’m here,” Deanna pointed. “Out of everyone in Alexandria, you are the one who will be able to read their intentions.”

It only took Ava a moment to understand what Deanna wanted from her. She wanted Ava, and Enid, to keep an eye on the group, to read them the way Ava read the residents of Alexandria. More specifically, Deanna wanted Ava to help her make the tough choice of either letting them stay, or putting them in exile.  It was a weight Ava didn’t know if she could bare, but looking at Enid, Ava was willing to take the load. She wanted this place to work, and if anyone threatened that, Ava was ready to take them out.

“I’ll keep an eye out.”   

Deanna stood up, placing a hand on Ava’s shoulder. “Thank you.”

Ava gave a soft smile before watching Deanna leave. She still had a few more interviews to finish with the new people, and couldn’t leave them waiting. Once she was gone, Ava turned to Aaron with a raised brow. He clenched his jaw.

“How much do you hate me?”

 “On a scale from one to fifteen?” Ava teased as Aaron shook his head. “Fifteen _possibly insane_ people is my ranking.”

 “You should’ve seen them out there, Ava.” Aaron sighed as he stood up. “They need this, whether they know it or not.”

Upon hearing Aaron’s statement, Ava noticed how Enid looked down at her hands. That was one thing the new group had in common with Enid; they didn’t realize how much they needed peace, at least a taste of normalcy. Ava looked back up at Aaron, nodding.

“Let’s hope they don’t fuck it up, then.”

After catching up a bit more, Aaron left to head to the Doctor’s quarters. During the recruiting mission, Eric messed his ankle up to the point of being unable to walk, and Ava could tell Aaron wanted nothing more than to be at his bedside. Once he was gone, Enid’s once cordial attitude faded into the distant look Ava was now familiar with. The girl grabbed her backpack, ready to head out when Ava stepped in front of the door.

“Can you take a break from hating my guts for one second?” Enid didn’t answer, but she also didn’t make a move. Ava took that as a sign to continue. “What do you think about this?”

Despite the bad blood between them, Enid was still Ava’s partner, her confidant. She wanted to know what she made of all this. If they should even give these people a chance to prove themselves when they were so obviously dangerous to the defenseless community. Enid adjusted her bag.

“I think we should’ve left when we had the chance because now these people are going to kill us in our sleep.”

Enid’s tone dripped of sass as Ava rolled her eyes. The younger girl gestured to the door.

“Can I go?” 

Ava glared, unmoving. “This ‘moody teen’ act is getting old really quick, kid.”

“Move!”

Enid pushed Ava out of the way. Although she wasn’t the strongest, the surprise of the touch did make Ava step to the side. If Ava was petty, she would have pushed Enid back. Sadly, she had to be the adult. She stepped forward as Enid opened the door.

“You can’t hate me forever.”

Enid didn’t spare her a glance as she walked outside. “We’ll see.”

The door slammed and Ava found a pillow to scream in.

* * *

Ava spent the rest of the day with Denise, the pair keeping Eric company while Aaron dealt with the new arrivals. Ava decided not to approach them today; if they were anything like herself or Enid, they would want space on their first day in a new place. She couldn’t deny that she was also a little intimidated by the new people. Ava was just getting used to the current Alexandrians, and the idea of having to introduce new people in her life was daunting.

“The leader has a kid about Enid’s age.” Eric informed the pair before looking at Ava. “Having him around could help her.”

Learning that the group of fifteen included a sixteen-year-old, and a baby, should have calmed Ava down. She should be mirroring Jessie’s own excitement about having a new kid for her loved ones to play with. Instead, Ava’s anxieties grew. Sixteen-year-olds weren’t harmless, especially ones that spent more than half their lives in this world. And a baby in this world produced a good front for dangerous groups; a way to fool others into thinking they were gentle when they were psychopaths.

Ava kept these thoughts to herself, projecting her stress and anxieties through workouts. The next morning, while Enid made her quick escape to Jessie’s, Ava opened the garage and spent her morning sweating. After doing a few chin-ups, Ava then moved to the driveway to do some push-ups. She was going on fifteen when the corner of her eye caught a flash of grey. Before she could register the fact that a man was running at her full speed, his legs collided into her side. Ava let out a small yell as she was pushed onto her back. The man seemed just as upset as he fell to the concrete, a string of curses leaving his mouth.

Ava groaned as she balanced herself on her forearms.

“Watch where you’re going next time—.” Ava trailed off the moment she looked at him.

She didn’t recognize him; hasn’t seen him outside his home giving her an uncomfortable wave, or working the gate. Ava also noticed how fresh he appeared. With a tuft of brown curly hair, and a freshly shaved face, she realized that he was new. Taking in his expression of panic, and complete confusion, Ava deduced that he was one of the fifteen people; a member of the group that was truly out there for too long. She registered his agitated breathing as he quickly got to his feet, turning around in every direction as if looking for something he lost.

Ava knew the feeling.  

“Hey,” Ava raised her voice, the volume earning his attention. “You need to breathe.”

He stopped turning and instead focused on the woman lying on the ground. As Ava got to her feet, she could see his expression twist into one of sympathy and slight embarrassment.

“I’m sorry,” He apologized, the words stuttering as he struggled to calm himself down. “Did you see a boy with a baby walk by?”

If Ava had her doubts about the man being part of the group, he just confirmed it. The tactics she learned beyond the wall crept up on her; Enid and Ava would often get asked to help someone back to their camp. They never fell for the obvious trap, and Ava kept marching forward. However, taking in the desperate look the man projected, Ava could tell he wasn’t a monster.

Or, as the cynical side of her tried to breakthrough, he could be a great actor. Nevertheless, Ava decided to help him.

“I didn’t,” She shook her head. “But…I think I know where we can find them.”

Ava gestured at him to follow, the man only hesitating a moment before taking off in a light jog to catch up with her. The two were silent as they scanned porch after porch; a soft smile took over Ava’s face when she saw that she was correct in her assumptions. On the porch of Natalie and Bob Miller were a young boy and a baby. She glanced at the man, practically seeing the weight lift off his shoulders.

“That’s Natalie and Bob. They love the young people,” Ava half-halfheartedly joked. “They held my little sister by her cheeks for a good few minutes." 

It was true. On one of their walks around Alexandria, when Enid first woke up, the old couple called the girls over to introduce themselves. Although they were fond of Ava, it didn’t go unnoticed how smitten they were with Enid; the younger girl's expression reading 'murder' as they played with her hair. After Jessie told Ava that they once had a grandchild Enid’s age, she understood the fascination. Everyone wanted a piece of their old lives.

“Thank you,” The man’s low voice brought Ava back to reality. “I’m just...”

“I get it,” Ava put a hand up, not wanting him to deal with baggage he wasn’t ready to just yet. “I’ve lost my mind, too.”  

The man blinked as he turned to Ava, facing her directly. “You’re Ava.”

Ava’s heart started beating quicker than before. She didn’t like it when strangers knew her name, especially ones that were just running manically through Alexandria. Sensing the tension, the man cleared his throat.

“Deanna told me about you,” He explained. “Said how you would be able to…relate.”

She sighed. Of course, Deanna mentioned her. The leader saw it as a win that Ava and Enid decided to stay here, and she wanted to flaunt it as much as possible, especially to a group that were possibly questioning their own residency.  Deanna most likely saw Ava’s decision as a way to coax them into staying. Maybe it would work, but Ava knew better. These people were going to do whatever they wanted, ‘real accounts’ be damned.

“That sounds like her,” Ava kept it simple. “I’ll do my best to answer questions, but I’m not exactly ready for pep talks.”

The man grinned slightly, and Ava wondered how long it has been since he was able to do so.

“I’m Rick,” He awkwardly introduced before gesturing back towards her house. “Sorry for interrupting…whatever you were doing." 

Ava stifled a grin at his introduction. Rick must have realized just how uncomfortable his knowledge of her name made Ava. Much like her first interactions in Alexandria, he made a delayed response to correct it.

“Working out?”

He nodded, attempting to make conversation. “Do you…do that often?”

“I try to,” Ava admitted. “I don’t want to forget all I learned.”

Rick’s brows raised slightly at that comment, but he didn’t question it any further. If he was as smart as Ava was giving him credit for, he didn’t need the reason behind her words to be spelled out. Seeing that he has already spoken to Deanna, he most likely knew just how inept the community was.

“Thank you,” Rick repeated.

Ava nodded, “You’re welcome.”

The pair held eye contact until Rick turned around and made his way towards Carl and Judith. Ava’s eyes landed on the boy, how he was studying her from afar with the same glare that Enid gave strangers. Ava could tell he would be hard to crack. At least, he wouldn't be open to her. 

“Hey, Rick.”

Rick stopped before reluctantly turning to face Ava. She stepped forward.

“I know Jessie already told you about his son Ron and how he wants to meet Carl?” She waited as Rick nodded. “I don’t know what your plans for the day are, but now would be a good time. My little sister Enid is over there now, and she can...”

“Relate?” Rick completed, repeating Deanna’s words.

Ava sighed as a small smile formed. “Yeah.”

Rick nodded once, a ghost of a smile on his face before resuming his walk towards his children. Ava turned around and made her way back towards the house. Enid would be able to read Carl like a book, more so than Ava could. If he turned out to be a psycho, Enid would know. However, a small part of Ava hoped for the better scenario.

A scenario in which Enid would have someone she actually _enjoyed_ talking to.  

 


	8. Tough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava goes on a dry run and doesn't like what she sees. Enid meets a young member of the new group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this one was fun to write! I love having Team Family in the mix, and I hope my writing for them isn't awful lol. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Cars crashing, plastic hitting plastic, and the mumbles of cursing weren’t enough to make Enid look up from her book. She had gotten use to the sounds of video games and boys rough housing—it was annoying, but better than being in the same space with Ava. Enid couldn’t deny that it was an immature move on her end, but she didn’t care. Her older sister once prided on the fact that they made the big decisions together, but when it came to the most important decision of their lives, she pulled the ‘adult card’. Ava needed to realize that Enid felt betrayed, and it would take a while for her to get over it.

It took Ron and his friend, Mikey, three visits to realize that Enid wasn’t here for their company, she was here for the privacy. She didn’t want friends, she wanted to get out of Alexandria, to feel the freedom Ava had taken from her. Enid got a small taste of it after leaving Ron's, but it was never enough. On her walk back to Alexandria, Enid would always pause and think about running away. She had gotten close to leaving a few times, but there was always that pull she felt back at the community.

Ava. Enid may be upset with her now, but she didn’t hate her. Enid couldn’t imagine life without her sister. Ava called it their ‘bond’, but all Enid saw it as was a weakness. A weakness the sisters shared, and that would inevitably be their downfall.

Enid shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts as she put her focus back on the words written on the page. She didn’t look up when she heard Ron’s voice carrying down the hallway; however, her interest did peak slightly when she heard an unfamiliar voice answer him. 

“Carl,” Ron stopped in the doorway. “This is Mikey and Enid.”

Mikey paused his game, standing up to greet the new arrival. “Hey!”

Enid made no such move, but responded nonetheless. “Hi.”

She wasn’t surprised when the room descended into a somewhat awkward silence. Enid was never the best at introductions; she lucked out at the party since Jessie did all the work. Back then, she thought they were only here temporarily, which also improved her mood slightly. Now, she saw no reason to interact with newbies. Ava may be content turning into a suburban puppet, but Enid was not.

She tensed slightly when Ron touched her shoulder, the gesture making her look up from the page. Enid didn’t know what made Ron think that they were close; maybe he thought he was the only one who could ‘fix her’. Enid suppressed a gag at the thought.

“Enid’s from outside too,” Ron explained, “She and her older sister Ava were brought in a few weeks ago.”

Enid looked down at her book, but kept her ears open. If this kid was part of the group of fifteen, this was her chance to get an impression on him. Carl pulled a comic book from his pocket.

“Is this yours?”

He awkwardly showed it off to Ron and Mikey, the former letting out a small laugh.

“Sorry, we didn’t know you guys got that house.”

Mikey nodded. “We mostly just hang out there and listen to music. That’s Enid’s.”

Before Carl could offer it to her, Enid ripped it out of his hands and threw it on the bed. The last thing Enid needed was a full production in getting her comic back; a comic she read in another room while Mikey and Ron wrestled each other with old records playing in the background. She could still feel his gaze on her as she went back to reading. It lingered until Ron spoke up.

“Do you want to play some video games?” He walked over to the T.V. “Or, Mikey’s house has a pool table, but his dad is pretty strict about it.”

Mikey chuckled. “It’s okay, he’s at work.”

Carl mumbled, but didn’t answer the Anderson boy. Enid didn’t look up, but she did grip her book a little tighter.

“Sorry, we come on kind of strong,” Ron apologized. “We can just hang out, you don’t even have to talk.”

Mikey nodded. “Yeah. Enid sometimes never speaks.”

Enid ignored the comment and instead looked over at Carl. She knew what he was feeling; the overwhelming sensation of suddenly being back in a ‘normal’ world. When she first went to Ron’s house, Enid excused herself to the bathroom where she had a full panic attack. Enid used to love hanging out with friends, meeting strangers, but now it filled her with dread and fear. It was a confirmation that this wasn’t normal. Enid didn’t belong here, and as much as Ava wanted to pretend, she knew her older sister didn’t either.  

She gave Carl a once-over before offering the only advice she could think of. Advice she once heard Ava mutter to herself a few days after their parents died when she thought Enid was sleeping.

“Pull it together, sport.”

* * *

Although it was too early to tell, Ava felt a bit more at ease after meeting Rick. He seemed normal, at least more normal than Ava thought he would be. The absolute fear he felt when he couldn’t find his kids spoke volumes to her; she knew the dread he experienced, and his look of relief when he saw them was one only a father could have. At least she knew he was telling the truth about that.

She hadn’t had a chance to truly meet the rest of the group. She didn’t want to crowd them the way the rest of the residents were; some of them seemed ready to pounce on any unfamiliar face they saw. She knew what it was like to be under a microscope, and Ava didn’t want to make anyone else feel that way.

However, Deanna did introduce Ava to a young woman named Maggie Greene when the leader saw her going to the food pantry. Maggie was kind and dignified, and Ava could tell she was genuinely curious when she asked about herself—and Enid. Despite her kindness, Ava sensed a fire within her; she was strong, a leader itching to break free, and that was what Alexandria needed.

On her way to meet with Aiden and Nicholas the next morning, Ava spotted another member of the group on a porch. Unlike Rick and Maggie, it was clear he hadn’t taken advantage of the community’s running water. He focused on gutting the animal in front of him, only pausing when he heard Ava’s steps upon the sidewalk. His gaze burned through her, as if daring her to challenge him. Or, more accurately, hoping to see a reaction from her. Ava didn’t stop walking, but she did offer him a nod, which he responded with a grunt before getting back to work.

Everyone had their coping mechanisms.  Who was Ava to judge?

 “Ah, all the newbies are here.” Aiden smiled as she drew closer. “Ava, this is Glenn, Tara, and Noah. Guys, this is Ava. She was the new girl before your group came in.”

Ava smiled at the trio as Aiden pointed them out. Glenn offered his own nod and smile in response while Noah waved. Tara seemed to be the most enthusiastic, giving a mock salute. She took them in, realizing that this group of fifteen may just be the most diverse she had ever seen on the road. The apocalypse sucked, but the fact that it brought people of totally different backgrounds, and age groups, together was strangely beautiful in Ava’s eyes.

“Now that introductions are out of the way, it’s time to show you the ropes.” Aiden grinned as he walked past them.

Tara blinked. “Are we doing a run today?”

“Just a dry run to show you the terrain outside the walls,” Aiden explained. “I wanted to take Ava out for some time, but a group of six has better chances than three.”

Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She could already tell that Aiden loved to play leader, more specifically, liked to hold the appearance that he was in charge. Little did he know that the group of four would probably do better without him and Nicholas. But, Ava kept her mouth shut. It was her first time going out with the group, and she wouldn’t berate them—unless it was necessary.

“What about weapons?” 

The question left Ava’s mouth a little too quickly, but she was eager. It felt strange to her to not have a gun strapped to her hip, or her bow constantly on her back. She did have her knife holstered, though Deanna made it clear she could only wear it when she was going outside the gates. Glenn glanced over at her, and Ava could tell he was thinking the exact same.

“Oh yeah, we pulled out some sweet biscuits for today.” Aiden smirked before gesturing to Nicholas.

The shy man passed out pistols to each of the members, Ava stifling a laugh. If Aiden considered these ‘sweet biscuits’, he truly didn’t go out often. Ava and Enid would often see groups with machine guns; they made sure to stay away. She checked the ammo, glad to see it was filled before putting the gun in the waistband of her jeans. Aiden nodded and signaled for them to move out, the two Alexandrians up front while the four lingered behind. As they walked, Ava expected a silent trip, but was surprised when it was Tara who jogged up next to her.

“Ava, right?” She asked, earning a nod from Ava. “How long have you been here?”

Ava shrugged. “A few weeks.”

“You alone?”

Ava turned to Tara and rose a brow. Noah’s laughter cut through the air.

“That’s not super creepy, Tara.”

Tara raised her hands in defense. “Just a simple question!”

“It’s fine,” Ava laughed herself, almost ashamed about her paranoia. “No, I’m not. My little sister Enid and I got picked up by Aaron and Eric.”

“And what do you think?”

Glenn spoke up for the first time, a look of genuine interest on his face. Before the group went to sleep last night, Rick told him about his interview Deanna and how she brought up a ‘young girl and her sister’. He also said how he met the older girl; Rick made it clear that, unlike the rest of the residents, she seemed to have her "head screwed on straight". If she had any worries about Alexandria, Glenn didn’t doubt she would voice them.

“It’s better than being out there,” Ava answered, her voice low. “Enid and I have nothing to worry about.”

Ava stared into Glenn’s eyes, hoping the message was getting across. If anything were to happen to the community, or within it, Ava would be sure she and Enid would live. Luckily, he seemed to understand as a knowing grin overtook his features.

“Us too.”

Ava grinned. Maybe these people weren't so bad.

* * *

 

The rest of the walk to the vantage point was full of light conversation. Ava learned that Noah and Tara were somewhat new to the group while Glenn had been with them since the beginning; specifically Rick, his son Carl, a woman named Carol, and Daryl.

“You might have seen him,” Glenn explained when Ava said she hadn't met him. “He’s been hunting.”

Realization hit Ava. “Oh, the dude gutting animals on the pristine white porch?”

“That's him!" Tara beamed.

“I like him already.”

Ava laughed when Tara teased Glenn about the love for his wife Maggie, Glenn only blushing and giving a joking “shut up!’ in response. Noah spoke, but not often. Ava didn’t need to be told, it was obvious he had recently lost someone, maybe many. Tara’s deadpan humor reminded Ava’s of Enid’s own sense—before she hated her guts. Once again, Ava was reminded just how much she missed being with people close to her age. The conversation died down as Aiden began to give directions, telling the four how the runs in Alexandria worked.

“We break into two groups when we step outside our vehicle,” Aiden instructed as they walked through the forest. “Shit hits, we fire a flare.”

Noah nodded, impressed. “Good system.”

Ava had to agree. She never had a big group to scavenge with; it was always just her and Enid, constantly together and never separating. It would be nice to have more people, it made it easier to cover ground and to find supplies that one person could easily miss.

“So, you’re standing here because we lost four people last month.”

A knot instantly formed in Ava’s stomach. Four people in a month? That was either some bad luck or awful direction. Ava hoped her guess of the cause was wrong.

“What happened?” Glenn asked, his eyes narrowing.

“Roamers came, and they didn’t follow the system.”

Nicholas was quick to add, “They were good people.”

“They were, just scared.” Aiden sighed. “Look, I know I can be a hard ass, but someone’s gotta call the ball around here and that someone is me. If you’re on this crew, you do exactly what I say.”

Aiden turned to face the newbies, unaware of the suspicion rising in Ava. If it was between life and death, Ava was going to do what she thought was right, not what some ROTC wannabe decided. Considering the looks she saw get exchanged between Tara and Glenn, Ava had a feeling she wasn’t alone in her sentiments.

“Sorry about your people.” Tara sympathized.

Aiden grinned. “We got ours.”

Ava assumed that they killed the dead ones who got their friends; an act of grief that wouldn’t bring them back, but did soothe the pain a bit.

“We caught one of the deadheads that took them down,” Nicholas jumped in. “Strung it right up here.”

“What the hell?” Ava couldn’t hide her disgust. “Why?”

Aiden shot her a look over his shoulder, obviously not appreciating the judgement behind her comment. Ava didn’t care; it was weird. She had never heard of someone wanting to get revenge on a 'dead one'.

“We have a little pregame ritual,” Nicholas went on. “To get our heads on straight.”

Aiden added, “It reminds us what we’re up against.”

“You need a reminder?” Ava drawled out.

The boys ignored her, making Ava roll her eyes. Even though she just met her, Ava found herself looking at Tara, the girl simply shaking her head at their reasoning as well. When the people who haven’t been in a civilized society in months were more humane than those inside a community, there was a big problem. That thought grew louder in Ava’s mind as they reached the chain, the restraints bloody but missing a walker. She took her gun out of her pants, instantly surveying the area.  She could give two shits about a ‘ritual’, Ava would shoot the monster on sight. When Nicholas let out a whistle, Ava, along with the trio, instantly hushed him.

“Hey!” Glenn whispered, “It’s gone, let’s go.”

Aiden jingled the chains. “It took down one of our friends. I’m not letting it go.”

Nicholas whistled again. Before Ava could threaten to chop his fingers off, the walker appeared right behind Aiden. However, instead of killing it, Aiden attempted to attach its’ rotting body back onto the chain. Ava’s jaw went slack, wondering how stupid one person could be. She and Noah trained their guns on the Walker, only to have Nicholas yell at them to put them down.

Noah listened, but Ava pulled her knife out of its’ holster.

Aiden was clearly losing the battle. Half of Ava wanted to just watch him get bit, to show him how truly insane this all was. The reasonable side won as Ava got behind the Walker, ready to take it out when Aiden pushed the deadhead towards her. Ava let out a small gasp of surprise, but didn’t show fear as she ripped away at its’ skin.

“Hold onto it!” Aiden commanded.

Ava ignored him as the walker turned around, growling right in her face. Ava gripped it's neck, trying to steady him before putting the knife through his cheek. She clenched her teeth, almost ashamed of her miss when Glenn jumped in. Putting his own blade through the skull, Ava pushed the Walker out of the knife and to the ground. Silence overtook the clearing, but Ava looked at Glenn with surprise. He had just met her, and considered her worth saving. That was new.

“What the hell!” Aiden interrupted the realization.

Tara stopped aiming her weapon. “Yeah, what the hell?”

“You almost got her killed!” Glenn growled.

Ava didn’t notice that Glenn had a hand on her shoulder until it was gone. His eyes flashed with fire as he got into Aiden’s face. Aiden didn’t back down, his own eyes going between Glenn and Ava.

“I told you all to stay back, I told you to listen to me,” Aiden screamed before glaring at Ava. “I told you that.”

Ava’s eyes went wide, realizing he was trying to peg her as the bad guy. She should’ve let him get bit, it would’ve happened if they weren’t there, after all. Ava simply shook her head, walking up to him with a glare of her own.

“Good thing I didn't listen.”

She didn’t wait for them as she began walking back in the direction they came. Glenn, Tara, and Noah caught up to her in an instant, the four of them walking together while Aiden and Nicholas struggled to keep up. The silence between them all spoke volumes; none of them wanted to deal with this every time they went out on a run. It was sick, and did nothing to help the community. The guard opened the gate when he saw them making their way back, Ava going in first as the rest followed behind.

“You four need new gigs.” Aiden called after them once they were inside Alexandria.

Glenn didn’t turn around. “I’m pretty sure you got that backwards.”

“Hey,” Aiden grabbed Glenn by the shoulder, and the rest stopped as well. “We got a way of doing things here--.”

"You tied up _walkers_ ," Ava interrupted. "Don't act like that's for anything besides your damn pride."

Aiden turned to Ava. “It killed our friends!”

Ava didn’t look away, but she could see out of the corner of her vision that people were starting to gather. She didn’t care, they needed to know how truly dangerous one of their 'scavengers' were. Aiden looked Ava up and down before chuckling. 

“I’m not having this conversation,” He stepped back. “You’re supposed to listen to me out there.”

Ava scoffed, “I’m not dying like your last group.”

Silence overtook the area, tension weighing down on the group. She ignored the glare from Nicholas, and how Glenn was looking at Aiden, daring him to contradict the truth. Ava even ignored Enid, the girl coming out of the greenery to watch what was happening, her doe-eyes filled with worry when she saw how close Aiden got to Ava.

“Want to repeat that, Princess?”

Ava grinned without any humor behind it. She was used to men trying to appear tougher than they are, especially in this world. The gender thrived from showing how strong they were. However, unlike those men, Ava didn’t need to prove how cowardly Aiden was. He was doing that all by himself. Tara rolled her eyes, clearly just as unimpressed as Ava.

“Back off, Aiden.”

Glenn agreed, though he did enjoy how Ava was winning. “Just walk away.”

“I bet you feel real tough now, don’t you?” Ava scoffed.

Aiden’s mouth went into a line, and Ava didn’t know if he planned to respond when Deanna made herself known. It took his Mother to ask what was going on to finally make him rip his hard gaze away from Ava.

“Why’d you let _any_ of these people in?”

Ava couldn’t help herself. “Because we know what we’re doing, and we’re not holding dick measuring contests out there."

Ava wasn’t surprised when Aiden turned around, swinging a punch in her direction. Enid gasped as she ran closer to the action, ready to help her sister kick his ass. However, Ava clearly had it handled as she jumped backwards, avoiding the hit with precision. Ava didn’t have plans to let him off easily, and she planted her foot on his stomach, kicking him to the concrete ground.Enid stopped running, a small smirk overcoming her face at the scene. There was the Ava she knew, the one that she once worried was gone.

Nicholas ran towards her, and Ava was ready for another take-down when Daryl tackled him. He held him down just as Rick came running through the gates, trying to calm his rattled friend. When Aiden stood up, Ava began walking towards him, ready to knock him down once more when someone grabbed her arm. Ava turned, ready to attack the person, but stopped herself when she saw the warning glare of a stranger.

The black woman sent her a knowing look, “I think you proved your point.”

Seeing that Aiden was still struggling to catch the air Ava knocked out of his lungs, she agreed. The woman let her go when she saw she wasn’t going for round two. Ava adjusted her shirt, keeping her hands busy so that the temptation wasn’t there. She also tried not to look at Rick, although she could feel his gaze on her. He stared at her as if doing so would give him the answers he now desired.

“I want everyone to hear me,” Deanna yelled over the crowd. “Rick and his people are part of the Community now, just like Ava and Enid. As equals. Understood?" 

She turned to Aiden, the boy still glaring between Ava and Glenn. Ava clenched her fist to her sides, as if daring him to come at her again. Instead, Aiden simply pursed his lips before answering.

“Understood.”

 “Turn in your weapons, then come talk to me,” Deanna gestured to Nick and Aiden before turning to Ava. “I want to talk to you too, Ava.”

“Good,” Ava shrugged, unbothered. “I’ll tell you exactly what happened.”

Ava made sure to look at Aiden and Nicholas during her last statement. She didn’t care if this labelled her a ‘snitch’, Deanna needed to know what her son was doing out there. The two boys made their way to the Armory, leaving Ava with Deanna and a group she wasn’t a part of.

While she spoke to Rick and the woman that held Ava back, whom she learned was named Michonne, about becoming the constables of Alexandria, Ava’s gaze landed on Enid. Even from this distance, she could see her chest heaving, still reeling from watching Ava being threatened. Ava sent her a small smile, hoping to reassure her.

“Thank you.”

Deanna’s voice brought Ava back to reality, and she realized everyone in the small circle was staring at her. Ava reluctantly looked away from Enid in favor of sending the leader a confused look.

 “For what?”

“For knocking him on his ass.”

Ava offered a ghost of a smile, relieved that Deanna saw that he deserved it. However, as the rest of the lingering Alexandrians looked at her in fear, she hoped they would come to the same conclusion sooner rather than later.

* * *

 

That night, Ava sat on the front steps of the house, taking advantage of the crisp air without dealing with the stares of bored residents. After the confrontation with Aiden, Ava spent the day cooling down in the privacy of her own home. Of course, ‘cooling down’ turned into her doing pull-ups in the garage. Spencer did come to visit later in the afternoon, asking how she was doing and telling her that Deanna would speak to her in the morning.

“He had it coming for a long time.” Spencer answered Ava’s question as to why he was here with her instead of helping his brother. “I’m kind of bummed I missed it.”

Ava thought about asking Spencer about the Walkers, but decided against it. If he didn’t know, Ava didn’t want to cause a rift between the brothers. The real fear was that he _did_ know and didn’t mind the action. Instead, they made out on the couch in the garage; Ava enjoyed that course of action much more than a heavy conversation.

She didn’t see Glenn, Tara, or Noah after the punch, most likely laying low while they explained what went down to Rick. She hoped that whatever they told him, it would put her on his good side. With the memory of how heavy his gaze was on her, Ava didn’t want to know what Rick’s bad side was like. On the walk back to Ava’s house, she did find herself walking next to Daryl. 

_“Thanks for the backup.” Ava spoke first._

_Daryl grunted. “Didn’t look like you needed it.”_

_“Then why jump in?”_

_“Don’t care for guys who hit woman.”_

He disappeared up the steps of a house, and Ava didn’t stop him. She decided that she liked Daryl.

As she listened to the crickets of the night, Ava took a sip of her water, trying to unwind. She closed her eyes with a sigh, hoping that tomorrow would be better. Her wishes were interrupted when she felt a slight nudge on her shoulder. Opening her eyes, the sight of a wrapped chocolate greeted her.

“I smuggled this from the Pantry,” Enid’s voice filled the air. “I think you deserve it.”

If Ava was responsible, this would’ve been the perfect time for the ‘don’t steal’ lecture. Luckily, she was anything but a role model and accepted the candy with a small laugh. Enid took a seat next to her, and Ava couldn’t help but look at her.

“You said more than two words to me and now you’re sitting next to me?” Ava feigned shock. “I’m truly honored.”

“I’ve been a jerk lately, I know.” Enid sighed. “But I’m not apologizing. You hurt me.”

“I didn’t mean to.” Ava frowned. “But I knew you’d say no, and I wanted to give this place a chance. I still do.”

It was true. Somewhere deep in Ava’s mind, she knew it wasn’t an accident that she kept Enid out of the conversation. Alexandria was inept, but it was good for them—and Ava knew Enid didn’t see that. She wouldn’t until she gave it a chance herself. Enid bit her lip.

“I…don’t know if I can.”

Her voice sounded so small, and it broke Ava’s heart. Enid wished she could be like Ava, that she could just dive into a new place—still having reservations, but not letting it get in the way. But Enid knew she wasn’t built like that.

“You can, and once you do, I know you’ll feel better.” Ava kept her eyes on her sister. “But you won’t get there if you keep shutting people out, shutting _me_ out.”

Enid wanted to agree with Ava, but she knew she couldn’t. She may learn to tolerate Alexandria, to play the role, but she would never feel like herself again. Enid would never be as happy as she was out there. However, she was done shutting Ava out. Enid missed her, and seeing Ava almost get punched out reminded her just how much Enid needed her.

It was a weakness, but Enid didn’t care. Enid just wanted her sister back.

“I’m done with that,” Enid reassured Ava. “I want us to be…us, again.”

Ava smiled widely. That’s all she wanted too. She missed her little sister, and the conversations they shared. It was time to be a team—a broken one, but a team nonetheless. Ava opened the wrapper and tore the chocolate in half, passing one of Enid. Ava then held her piece up, hoping to initiate a toast between the two treats. The younger sister rolled her eyes, but Ava could see that it was playful as they touched the chocolates.  

“So,” Ava spoke with a full mouth. “Tell me about your day.”  

 

 


	9. Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava and Aaron meet a familiar face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter is super long, but I wanted to get it out there. I'm about to go back to school and updates may be a bit more sporadic--consider this an early apology :P! Hope you enjoy!

When Ava got to Deanna’s house the next morning, she was surprised to find that Maggie was present as well. The pair offered Ava a smile before Deanna gestured for her to take a seat. Ava obliged and took the spot across from Deanna.

“Before we get started, I want to apologize for Aiden’s behavior yesterday.” Deanna spoke, her voice instantly commanding the group. “I never expected him to lash out in that way, especially to you.”

That was funny to Ava, because she totally expected it. If she hadn’t, Ava would’ve been the one knocked on her ass. It wasn’t the first time a man tried to hurt her, and it wouldn’t be the last. Gender lines didn’t exist anymore; if you were considered a threat, don’t expect to be treated lightly just because of what you identified as. Although the apology would have meant more coming from Aiden himself, Ava knew not to hold her breath. Ava buried the idea of having a friendship with him the moment he pulled the stunt with the Walker.

“It’s fine, I handled it.”

“Yes, you did.” Deanna leaned back in her chair. “Which is why I’m keeping you, along with Glenn, Tara, and Noah, on the run group.” Ava’s eyes widened slightly. “Remember that this isn’t a three-strike system. The next time this happens, we’ll have to relocate you.”

In all her anxieties about being removed from the scavenging team, Ava forgot one important detail; Deanna loved giving out second chances. She was lucky Ava wasn’t a psycho, or this ‘system’ would be out of Alexandria’s favor. Ava nodded, hoping her small smile showed her understanding and appreciation.

“Thank you, and it won’t happen again.” Ava pursed her lips.

Deanna raised a brow. “Is there something else, Ava?”

There was something else, but Ava didn’t want Deanna to assume something negative from the question swirling in her mind. However, she couldn’t resist.

“Why give me a second chance?” Ava blurted the inquiry out. “You have a whole community that can learn how to scavenge, why take a risk with four people you just met?”

Maggie looked over at Deanna, wondering the same. Even though the three other people in the run group were her own people, the woman was curious as to why Deanna was giving them so much power. Including Ava, Deanna seemed to be putting all her hopes for the community’s future in the newbies. It didn’t seem like a hard question to the leader, Deanna merely giving a knowing look.

“It’s like you said, you know what you’re doing out there. You all do.” Deanna explained. “I’m not going to be around forever, and I want to be sure I leave capable people to keep the community growing. That’s why Maggie’s here, too.” Ava glanced at Maggie, only to see her eyes glued to Deanna. “I see leadership qualities in her, and it’s nice to know someone can take up the mantle.”

Ava’s features softened. Deanna gave out second chances because she wanted Alexandria to survive. It was still risky, but even Ava couldn’t deny that it was a good move. The community can welcome anyone, if capable people were in charge. Maggie looked over at Ava, and the two women shared a knowing look.

“What?”  Deanna asked, “Is that so ridiculous?”

“No.” Maggie spoke up, her face holding a genuine expression.

Ava shook her head. “Not at all.”

Deanna made the future of Alexandria seem achievable. Ava just hoped she wouldn’t be the one to screw it up.

* * *

 

The meeting dissolved a little bit after the conversation, and Ava found herself walking through the streets of Alexandria once more. It was still early, leaving only the gatekeepers and a few early-risers wandering. With each stranger Ava passed, she could feel the heat of their judgmental gaze. She could’ve sworn that a pair of middle-aged woman picked up their speed when they saw Ava coming down the street. Ava sighed, realizing that Aiden may have thrown the first punch, but she was still the girl who was able to knock him down with a single kick. The one who had a wild look in her eyes that none of them had seen, at least since the day she showed up.

Ava prided herself on not caring what others thought, but even she couldn’t take a whole day of pointed stares and glares. It was this reason that made her agree to going outside the walls with Aaron when he saw her walking back towards her house.

“It’s just a simple hunting trip,” Aaron explained as they walked towards Ava’s house. “I figured you’d like to use your bow…and get some fresh air.”

Aaron was with Eric when the fight happened but, just like everyone in the community, he heard about it. He didn’t need to be there to know that Aiden had it coming, but it was already harming the good reputation Ava was able to build for herself. She needed a day out in the wild. After telling Enid that she would be gone for most of the day, Ava went to the Armory for a pistol, slid her quiver and bow on her back, and met Aaron at the gate.

The deeper they walked into the wilderness, the more serene Ava felt. It was as if all her worries disappeared the moment she breathed in the early morning air. It was heaven, or at least the closer she would get to it.  Ava kept an arrow cocked in her bow as she and Aaron made conversation, the man coming up with the idea to play ‘Twenty Questions’. It was a silly game in Ava’s eyes, but it did give her a chance to find out more about Aaron, and who he was before.

“What was your first kiss like?” Ava asked, a sly smirk on her face.

“Well, I was six when I kissed a girl on the Playground. I think even then I knew I didn’t like it.” Aaron chuckled at the memory. “But my first kiss with a guy was at Prom during a game of ‘Truth or Dare?’. I got dared to kiss my best friend--.”

“And you liked it?” Ava couldn’t help herself.

Aaron nodded. “Oh yeah. Same question to you.”

“Eighth grade at the bus stop, our braces got caught.” Ava cringed as Aaron laughed. “It’s not funny! We had to go to the Orthodontics Office to get detached. Worst car ride of my life.”

Aaron didn’t speak, the only noise coming out of his mouth being his laughter. Ava smiled, unable to maintain her own giggles until the sound of a twig snapping cut through the air. The pair instantly silenced, Ava’s humorous expression now replaced with a focus glare as she raised her bow. She took up the lead as she walked towards the sound, Aaron behind her with his own rifle raised as backup. They both tensed when another snap echoed, except this time, a human voice accompanied it.

“Come out!”

Ava’s brows furrowed. She recognized that voice, but why? While Aaron lowered his rifle, Ava kept her guard up, along with her weapon. Just because a voice sounded familiar didn’t make it a good memory. When the pair came out of the underbrush, they were instantly greeted by a crossbow pointed at them. It was only when the weapon was lowered when Ava realized it was the man who tackled Nicholas yesterday, the man who had her back; Daryl.

Ava lowered her own weapon, but kept the arrow notched in her bow. She blinked at Daryl, wondering how someone so burly could be so silent. The air was tense, and Ava couldn’t stand it. Luckily, Aaron was there to break it.

“You can tell the difference between walkers and humans by sound?” Aaron’s expression held curiosity.

To no one’s surprise, Daryl didn’t answer. Aaron didn’t seem to mind as he kept going.

“Can you tell the difference between good people and bad ones?” He lowered his hands. “Rick doesn’t seem to be such an expert at that.”

Daryl shuffled his feet. “Ain’t much of a difference no more.”

Ava gave a mental shrug. He wasn’t wrong, but Ava saw it differently. It’s hard to trust anyone now, but it’s the ones who embraced the darkness within them when the world went to shit that you had to watch out for.

“Is that how you feel about your people?” Aaron asked, and Ava wondered why he was suddenly playing ‘Dr. Phil’ in the woods.

Daryl stepped forward, snarling. “Why are you following me?!”

The moment he got into their space, Ava’s instincts took over. Without a second thought, she pushed his shoulder, the surprise of the push making Daryl stumble backwards. He grunted and started stomping back towards them, only stopping when Ava put her hand up.

“That’s far enough.”

“What are you going to do?” Daryl’s voice grew louder. “I’m not like the momma’s boy back there. It’ll take more than a kick.”

Ava’s eyes narrowed as she scoffed. “I’ll figure something out.”

However, looking at him, Ava wondered if any of her moves would work. Daryl was more built than any of the Alexandrian residents. Hell, even Glenn and Rick were more lean than muscular. Instead, she mirrored Daryl’s glare. She couldn’t believe this was the quiet man she met yesterday, then again, she understood his sudden surge of anger. Out here, he was in his element. He could be himself. Ava didn’t know if she liked what she saw.

“Alright, let’s cool off.” Aaron voice was light, as if scolding two children. “Daryl, we weren’t following you. Ava, drop the defenses.”

She tore her gaze away from Daryl to look at Aaron, his gaze hard but holding a pleading look. The last thing they needed was another fight. Ava sighed and took a step back, as if proving that she would ‘behave’. Daryl stayed planted in his spot, his eyes still on Ava until Aaron spoke.

“We’re out here to hunt. Got a few rabbits.” He smiled, holding up his bag that carried the two rabbits Ava put an arrow through. “I know why you’re out here. Mind if we join you?”

Ava’s head snapped towards Aaron, unable to hide her disdain over his question. She came out here to get away from snarls and burning glares, not to be with the King of giving such looks. If Aaron noticed her annoyance, he didn’t acknowledge it, his eyes on Daryl. The man looked between Ava and Aaron, weighing his options. Ava prayed for him to say no.

“Keep up,” He growled before walking away. He looked over his shoulder with one last command. “And keep quiet.”

Once he was out of earshot, Ava sent a glare to Aaron. The recruiter adjusted the rifle on his back, a good-nature smile on his face.

“Well, you heard the man.”

With that, he followed Daryl further into the greenery. Ava angled her head up to the sky and groaned, hating that her day of peace now turned into a morning of tension.

* * *

 

Since Ava was outside the walls, Enid figured it would be a good call to stay within Alexandria today. She wasn’t afraid of Ava finding her, Enid suspected her older sister knew about her escapades, but of the residents realizing that they were both gone. If Enid left, she was sure Deanna would put it together, and Enid didn’t want to risk losing her outside time permanently. Instead, the younger sister sat by the lake, a comic book in her lap as she read.

It was harder trying to focus while kids laughed and parents chatted. Enid rather have the background noise of gurgling walkers and rustling leaves.

“Hey.”

Enid turned around to see Carl standing behind her, a sizable distance between them. She blinked, confused as to why he wanted to speak to her.

“Hi.”

Carl walked forward. “Enid, right?”

It was then Enid remembered he somehow ended up next to her when Ava and Aiden were going at it. He didn’t speak to her then, and Enid didn’t have plans to talk to him now. Without saying a word, Enid stood up from her spot and began walking away. Carl didn’t follow, but he did look towards her.

“You don’t like me, do you?”

Enid stopped in her tracks. If that’s all he wanted to know, he should’ve opened with that instead of pretending to not remember her name. She turned to look at him, and Carl waited for an answer. One never came as Enid walked away, leaving him in the dust.  

It was easier than saying that she hadn’t decided yet.

* * *

 

What once was a morning filled with laughter was now twisted into what was reminiscent of a dull homework assignment. Aaron tried to defuse the attention, but it was hard to talk to a man that only responded in grunts and didn’t want to be with them in the first place. Ava didn’t want to talk to Daryl either. If he wasn’t going to try, why should she?

The unmistakable sound of a horse’s snort made them all stop, and it was Ava who caught the first glimpse of the black animal in a clearing up ahead. Ava couldn’t hide her grin as she walked to the edge of the grass, watching as the horse ate.

“I’ve been trying to catch him for months,” Aaron grinned as he stopped next to Ava. “His name’s Buttons.”

“Aw,” Ava turned to him, a teasing smile on her face. “Nice name choice.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Ava could’ve sworn she saw Daryl give the smallest of smirks. It was gone just as soon as it appeared, and Ava blamed her delusion on the heat of the sun. Aaron looked between the pair.

“One of the kid’s saw him,” Aaron explained, his amusement evident. “I haven’t seen him in a while. I was afraid I missed my shot.”

Aaron kept his eyes on the creature as he rummaged through his backpack, pulling a long piece of rope out. However, much to Ava’s surprise, Daryl reached for the rope, tying it up in the knot needed. Despite her weariness of the man, she couldn’t hide her curiosity.

“Have you done this before?”

“My group did. They weren’t out there long,” Daryl explained, his gaze focused on the horse. “The long their out there, the more they become what they really are.”

Ava raised a brow as Daryl quietly stalked into the clearing. For a while, Ava and Aaron just watched as he approached the horse. Ava couldn’t believe this was the same man who almost shot them in the woods. His anger was now replaced with a sense of calmness, his palm out as he attempted to coax the horse.  However, she couldn’t help herself.

“Have horses ever been stared into submission before?”

“Ava.” Aaron warned.

Ava put her hands out. “It’s a real question.”

Before Aaron could respond, the horse let out a loud neigh. Considering the clearing. Ava could see a small group of Walkers approaching, Daryl already getting his knife out. The pair took off into the field just as the horse ran off, Ava quickly aiming an arrow and firing it into a Walker’s head. She then pulled out her own knife, turning around to get a dead one that was getting too close. Once the noises died down, and the dead were put to rest, Daryl didn’t waste a moment.

“This way.”

Tracking Buttons became the new mission of the trip, and Ava didn’t mind. Not only would Alexandria get a horse out of the deal, but the animal seemed to somewhat break the tension between the three strangers.

“Do you ride horses?” Aaron asked.

Daryl didn’t look up from the tracks. “I ride bikes.”

Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Of course, he’s a motorcycle rider. She should’ve guessed that by the vest alone. Aaron chuckled before turning to Ava, silently asking the same question. Ava shook her head.

“That was Enid’s hobby.”

Ava smiled as the memories came back to her. Enid wasn’t a professional rider, but she and their mom would go out every other weekend for a peaceful ride down a trail. Ava knew Enid always looked forward to those times, even when she pretended like she was ‘too cool’ to hang out with her Mom. Aaron smiled.

“She’ll get the first ride, then.”

Ava sighed. “If we’re not chased out of town by then.”

It was nice to get away from Alexandria, but they still had to go back. Ava didn’t know what kind of welcome she would get. Aaron looked between Ava and Daryl.

“I know you feel like outsiders, but it’s not your fault.” Ava and Daryl kept their eyes ahead as Aaron spoke. “Eric and I are still looked at as outsiders. We’ve heard our share of well-meaning, but offense things come out of the mouths of nice people. Fear shrinks the brain.”

The honesty in Aaron’s lecture spoke volumes to Ava. Aiden had that Walker tied up out of fear that he would lose more people without it. In his mind, it made sense. It was still the dumbest thing Ava had seen. Judging from Daryl’s silence, Ava wondered if he was contemplating Aaron’s words as well.

“Let them get to know you, the real you.” He glanced at Ava. “You should go to Deanna’s party tonight.”

Ava heard about the party the leader was throwing for the group of fifteen. She wasn’t planning on going, especially after seeing the way she was judged this morning. With Aaron’s words now rolling in her mind, she realized that was probably why she _should_ go.

“I got nothing to prove.” Daryl finally broke his silence. “I’ve met a lot of bad people out here. They weren’t afraid of nothing.”

Ava and Enid had been through their own hell. They have seen just how much darkness was inside humanity after society fell. Daryl’s statement was ignorant.

“You don’t think bad shit happened to those people?” Ava asked, her voice making Daryl tense. “You become what you fear to survive.”

Daryl peeked over his shoulder, but didn’t say anything as he kept walking. It wasn’t an excuse, but a reason. And it was that thought that made Ava wonder who she and Enid might have become if Aaron hadn't found them. 

* * *

“I’ll take the far ones.”

It was the first words Daryl spoke after the heated conversation. Ava nodded as she watched Buttons run through the clearing, avoiding the Walkers that were peeling out of the forest. Aaron followed the horse, wanting to keep his eyes on her.

While Ava went to take out her own set of Walkers, she made the mistake of not looking where she walked. It was then a rotter grabbed her ankle, pulling her to the ground. Ava let out a gasp as she quickly turned her body, angling her free leg to kick the skull. With each hit, the roamer grew slower, but he wouldn’t completely stop. Ava needed her knife, but she couldn’t reach it.

It was then a boot came down on the Walker’s head, squishing it into a bloody mess. Looking up, Ava watched as Daryl then grabbed another Walker and shoved it into what was left of the skull, ending it for good. Out of the entire interaction, the strangest thing to happen was Daryl offering his hand to the girl. Ava took it, and he instantly pulled her to her feet and out of the dead one’s grasp. It was then she thanked him for the second day in a row.

“Thanks.”

Daryl nodded his acknowledgment before bending down to collect an arrow. With his body bent, Ava got the perfect view of a Walker sauntering towards him. With the speed one only got from using the weapon repeatedly, Ava took the bow off her back and set an arrow in it. She let the tip fly, landing right between the Walker’s eyes as it fell to the ground. At the sound of the dead flesh contacting the greenery, Daryl spared it a glance before looking at Ava.

“Thanks,” He repeated as he bent down to get Ava’s arrow. He passed it to her. “Nice shot.”

Ava grinned, unable to stop herself from teasing. "Was that a _compliment_?"

"Don't get used to it." He growled. 

Ava only smiled, noticing the glint of amusement in Daryl's own eyes. The moment didn't last as the two rushed to follow Aaron’s path, hoping that the man got to the horse in time. However, the pair was greeted by the recruiter staring at the animal. Sadness crept into Ava’s heart as she watched the living dead claw at the horse, Buttons letting out neigh after neigh as the dead tore at its’ flesh. Ava took a shaky breath, willing herself not to cry. Instead, she focused on giving the animal at least a few moments of peace. Ava took out her knife before looking over at Aaron and Daryl.

“I got the left.”

Since the roamers were distracted, it was easy to take them out. Once the moans of the dead subsided, Ava found herself looking over the innocent animal. Buttons’ breathing was labored as she laid her head down. She knew this was it, and it broke Ava’s heart. Putting down people was easy, they knew why it had to be done. An animal didn't understand. Daryl turned to Aaron, gesturing down to the animal.

“Go ahead.”

Aaron looked just as reluctant. Ava looked away, pretending to distract herself with the knife in her hand. It took a few moments, but Buttons was put out of her misery with a single bullet. Ava looked over at him, taking in his expression of sadness. It was the first time Ava had ever seen him wear it.

“Hey,” Ava whispered, gaining his attention. “It…wasn’t meant to be.”

Aaron pursed his lips, trying to control himself. “She always ran.”

“You tried to help him.” Daryl spoke before turning and making his way through the clearing.

Ava sent Aaron a comforting smile before following the Hunter back to Alexandria. She had enough for today.

* * *

 

“You sure you're up for this?"

Ava stopped pulling at the hem of her skirt to look at Enid, her concerned expression illuminated by the moonlight. She hated to admit it, but Aaron was right; Ava needed to show these people who she really was, especially after taking Aiden out. She wasn’t doing this for Alexandria. Like Daryl, she had nothing to prove. This was for herself. To not let the judgments of strangers stop her from living. 

“Positive.” Ava answered as they continued to walk down the street. “I’m still a little shocked that you wanted to come.”

Enid shrugged. “We’re in this together.”

The answer came out of her mouth as if it was the easiest thing in the world. Ava sprung the idea to go after she returned from the hunting trip, telling Enid that she didn’t have to go if she didn’t want to. Enid jumped out the chance, and now Ava knew why. Enid wanted to show that she still had Ava’s back despite her displeasure at Ava’s choice. Ava may be doing this for herself, but Enid was doing it for her sister.

As the sounds of the party became louder, Ava could make out the silhouette of a man staring up at the crowded house. Daryl’s gaze was on the window, the shadows of people laughing and drinking having his full attention while he debated on joining them. Ava blinked, unable to believe that Aaron’s words got through to him.

“Traded vests tonight, I see.” Ava spoke, making Daryl look over to her as Enid looked up at her sister. “I like it, more formal.”

She expected him not to answer, and wasn’t disappointed. His gaze flipped to Enid, the young girl’s stare harsher than his own. So harsh that Daryl looked back at Ava just to get away from it. The older girl patted Enid’s shoulder.

“Enid, this is Daryl. Aaron and I met him on the hunt today.” Ava introduced. “Daryl, my little sister Enid.”

Enid seemed to relax. “Hey.”

“Hi.”

Silence overcame the trio, and Ava could see Daryl mentally wishing for Ava to go away. Enid obliged, obviously desperate to get away from the situation when she heeded Ron’s call to come inside. Ava rose a brow, wondering if Enid was keeping any ‘boy secrets’ from her. She then turned to Daryl, crossing her arms. Daryl looked her up and down, thinking of Ava’s first comment to him.

“You look different.”

Ava grinned. “Thanks for noticing.” She nodded up to the house. “Are you going in?”

Daryl glanced back at the party, the happiness deafening.

“Nah,” He looked down, shaking his head. “I dunno.”

Ava nodded. She knew that feeling all too well. It was odd for him, to see his friends adjusting quickly—or at least being able to put on the appearance of adjusting. It reminded Ava of Enid. Maybe one day the two would say more than one word to each other.

“That’s okay.” Ava reassured him. “I know dealing with people getting to know you is hard. If you feel like you can’t tonight…that’s just fine.”

Daryl didn’t look away from Ava, his brow furrowed at her words. Ava sighed, realizing that she still had a long way to go before she could give advice as well as Aaron. Hell, she may never be that good.

“That was awful," Ava shook her head, embarrassed. "You know what I mean, right?" 

“Yeah, I do.” Daryl nodded.

“Good.” Ava nodded as she walked up the stairs, stopping on the porch. “See you in there, or not.”

Ava gave a small wave before walking through the unlocked door. Daryl waited a few moments, even walked up and down the stairs a few times. It was ten minutes later when his decision became clear, and he walked in the direction of his home.

* * *

 

Walking into the house, Ava decided that coming late to a party was better than being on time. Everyone was already toasty, the alcohol flowing through their bloodstreams. Guests approached her, greeting Ava with smiles—smiles she wondered if she would’ve gotten if the room was sober. Nevertheless, she accepted them and did her best to grin back.

“Hey, there you are.”

Spencer maneuvered his way through the swarm, his smile radiant as he pulled her into a hug. Ava tensed slightly; it was odd that the sex and kissing didn’t bother her, but an average hug made her feel trapped. Constricted. She tried not to let it show as they separated, Ava smiling up at him.

“I didn’t think you were coming.” He admitted.

Ava playfully scoffed. “And miss the booze? Please.”

“Well, I better not keep the lady waiting any longer.” Spencer chuckled. “I’ll grab you something.”

Ava thanked him as Spencer made his way to the kitchen. She scanned the party, eyes landing on Enid pretending to listen as Ron told her story. She smiled, knowing that the boy’s heart was going to get broken. Ava rocked on her heels, suddenly wishing she was young enough to hang out with Enid’s ‘friends’ without being out of place.

“Ava!”

The unfamiliar yell made Ava quickly turn around, ready to attack. Her guard dropped when she realized it was Tara, the girl sitting with Glenn, Noah, Maggie, and a few others from their group that Ava hadn’t met yet. Glenn looked over at Ava, doing his best to send a look of apology as Tara messily gestured for her to come over. Curious, and a little amused, Ava made her way over to the group.

“Having a little too much fun, I see.” Ava grinned, noticing how drunk Tara was.

“She is, unfortunately.” Maggie agreed, clearly entertained.

“Shush,” Tara slapped Noah, making the man look at her in confusion. “Ava, this is Abraham and Rosita. Be friends!”

Ava looked up at the pair; a pretty Hispanic girl and a man that had to be three times her size with an impressive mustache. He rested his hand on her lower back, making Ava grin. It was an odd couple, but Ava saw how it could work. Strong people always seemed to gravitate towards each other.

“That’s an order, I guess.” Rosita teased before smiling politely. “Nice to finally meet you. They told us a bit about you.”

Ava hid her awkward demeanor with a small nod. Deanna using Ava as an example to others made her stomach turn, but Ava knew that wasn’t what they were talking about. If she had to guess, Glenn most likely told them about her interactions with Aiden and Nicholas as well as her own hesitations with Alexandria. Ava decided not to ask, only playfully cringing.

“Only good things, I hope.”

“We’ve seen it first hand,” Abraham chuckled, a bit red from his own alcohol intake. “You have fine form, my dear. Your first drink is on me.”

Ava couldn’t stop her small giggle, knowing he was speaking about the kick. She also knew he was drunk, considering that all the drinks were free. She shook her head.

“Thank you, but I already have one coming.” She gestured towards the kitchen, seeing Spencer's bobbing head.

“Good,” Abraham joked. “You deserve two.”

Ava joined in the small group, all of them laughing as Abraham and Tara slowly made their way to the kitchen. Maggie patted the seat next to her, and Ava obliged. As the night descended into more laughter, story-telling, and drinks from Abraham and Spencer, Ava realized that if this was what life was going to be like, she didn't mind. Not one bit. 


	10. Promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The scavenging group goes on their first run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thursday! Enjoy the chapter, ya'll!

“This sucks.”

“Enid.”

“One of the only good things about the Earth dying is that school went along with it.”

Ava’s laughter couldn’t be contained as she strapped her knife holster to her leg. While she was getting ready for a run—their first official run as a group—Enid was holding a tattered notebook, preparing for school. School. It still sounded like a joke to Ava, even more like a cruel one to Enid. To the younger sister, the whole idea was ridiculous. The world wasn’t going to go back to normal, and they didn’t need to pretend like it was. If they had to teach the kids something, it should be how to defend themselves, not algebra.

“It’s only until noon.” Ava put a hand on her shoulder. “I think you’ll survive.”

Enid pursed her lips. “Will you?”

Ava made the mistake of telling Enid the full story about what happened with Aiden, completely turning Enid against the idea of Ava being part of the run group. She wasn’t worried that Ava couldn’t handle herself, Enid saw what Ava was capable of, but she was concerned that Aiden’s ignorance would get her killed. Or worse. Ava sighed.

“Yes.” Her tone was firm. “Somehow, I will.”

The reference to their father’s old mantra only gave Enid slight relief. Ava would do anything to get home to Enid. Nothing could hold the older girl back from returning to her sister. Somehow, she would make it home to her. Enid nodded, but still had something she wanted to say.

“Don’t let them hold you back.”

Ava’s eyes softened. She knew what that meant. Enid didn’t want her to risk her life for people she just met. If things went south, she wanted Ava to get out of there as quickly as she could.

“I won’t.”

“You promise?”   

It was an act that Ava didn’t know if she could promise, but Enid would block her exit from Alexandria unless she did. Ava hated lying to Enid, which made her words even more painful.

“I promise.”

* * *

 

The school was held in the home of Tina Levison, a middle-aged woman that was a middle school teacher before the world fell. Ava noticed how the home was close to the back of Alexandria, giving Enid ability to go outside the wall. Judging from the way Enid was looking at the metal, Ava didn’t need to guess what her after-school activity was going to be for today. Her thoughts were interrupted when Tina opened her garage, inviting the tweens and teens in for a day of learning. Enid didn’t walk forward, instead, she turned around to face Ava.

“What if we played hooky?” She teased, though Ava could see the hope in her eyes. “We’ll go outside the wall and walk around.”

Ava smiled. It was tempting, but something neither of them could afford to do. Deanna may have let Ava stay on the run group, but she knew Aiden was watching her like a hawk. The moment she stepped out of line, he would run to his mom and Ava would be relocated for sure.

“We both have jobs to do, kid. This is yours, and I know you’ll be great.” Ava sighed as Enid frowned. “Give me a hug, loser.”

Ava didn’t wait for Enid to agree as she pulled her into her arms. Enid groaned, but Ava could tell it was for show as she felt Enid hug her tightly. They were both worried for the other; Enid feared of Ava’s well-being, and Ava worried that Enid would shut everything out before giving it a chance. After the hug, Enid looked towards the rapidly filling garage.

“You better go, they’re going to start.” Ava touched her shoulder. “If you need anything, go to Denise or one of the constables.”

Enid didn’t respond, her eyes big. “Please be safe.”

“You too.” Ava gave a smile. With one last squeeze of her shoulder, Ava began to walk backwards. “I’ll see you later tonight.”

“You better.”

Ava nodded, giving Enid a wave. She waited until she saw Enid sitting in a desk. When she deemed that Enid looked comfortable, and wouldn’t take off running, Ava made her way towards the Armory. 

* * *

 

Despite their last outing turning into an argument, the group looked to be in good spirits as Ava approached the Armory. She greeted Deanna and Reg, the parents watching as their son prepared to leave with worried eyes. Disappearing into the Armory to retrieve two guns and silencers, Ava noticed that a new person was added to their team. He was hard to miss with a mullet and wide eyes that darted nervously around the area.

“That’s him?” Ava asked as she passed Glenn a box of ammo.

“Yep.” Glenn nodded, putting the box in his pack. “Eugene will know exactly what we need to fix the grid.”

They had a checklist, courtesy of Glenn, but the run was also for something very specific—an electrical unit to power the generators. Since the day after Deanna’s party, Alexandria had been experiencing sporadic power failures; failures they needed to fix before the community was in permanent darkness. Maggie explained to Ava that he was the only one who knew how to fix it, and what they needed to get the job done. It only made sense for him to come along but, looking at his quivering lip, Ava wondered if he would be more of a problem than the dead. She turned to Glenn.

“You trust him.” The statement held the tone of a question.

“He’s family.” Glenn said before glancing over at Eugene. “…But I never met a dude who can be so smart and clueless at the same time.”

Ava sighed. “Thanks for making me feel better, buddy.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Glenn gave a cheeky grin, leaving Ava to playfully roll her eyes in response. Eugene may be clueless, but if Glenn’s nonchalance about him made Ava feel a little at ease. With Aiden and Nicholas on the trip, a cowardly genius was the least of her worries. After putting a gun in her hip holster, and making sure her knife was secure on her thigh, Ava grabbed an extra gun and made her way over to Eugene. Without saying a word, she offered it to him.

“No thank you, ma’am.” He shook his head.

“I’m not letting you near the van until you take it.” Ava warned.

“That’s fine by me. I’m not going.”

It was then Aiden walked out of the Armory, sizing Eugene up as he did so. She was lucky that she missed him at the party, Deanna sneakily putting him on guard duty to avoid an awkward situation. Ava needed the break, but a few days didn’t seem to be enough. Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes as their self-proclaimed leader puffed out his chest.  

 “I’m not driving all the way there just to drive back with the wrong shit.” He then looked over at Ava, a grin overtaking his features. “Don’t you agree, Princess?”

Ava’s grip tightened on the gun. His voice was low enough that no one else heard the ‘nickname’ Ava hated; the same title he gave her right before he tried to punch her out. Ava bit her tongue, feeling the eyes of Deanna on her, warning. The mother didn’t hear the demeaning name, she only saw Ava’s grim expression.

“On second thought, I believe this will be safer in my hands for now.” Eugene spoke up, taking the gun out of Ava’s grip.

“Thatta boy, Eugene!” Aiden mockingly cheered before turning to Ava, his grin widening.

Ava wanted nothing more than to punch it off. However, she didn’t show aggression, only putting on a smile that was the definition of passiveness. She knew what he was doing; he was trying to bait her, to get her kicked off the run group right now. Once he realized Ava wasn't falling for it, Aiden disappeared into the Pantry. She let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, and Eugene merely shook his head.

“That man’s a ‘class A’ asshole.”

“You said it.” Ava then gestured to the gun in his hands. “You’ll be fine. There’s too many of us here to let anything happen to you.”

Eugene didn’t seem so sure, but he did give Ava a nod. She patted his shoulder; he may not be scavenger material, but at least he had a good judge of character. Ava made her way to the van, loading her backpack as well as a few more guns in the back. She laughed as Tara teased Noah, and smiled when she saw Maggie and Glenn whispering to one another. The calmness of it all gave the illusion that going on life-threatening runs like this was normal.

When Ava loaded up one of the last packs, she was surprised when Spencer came and helped her put it away. She grinned; with both of their schedules, Ava hadn’t had a chance to see him since the party. And, much to her surprise, Ava missed him.

“Aren’t you supposed to be on guard duty?” She teased. “Boss lady is right over there, you know.”

“I’ll be quick.” Spencer smiled. “I just really need to tell you something before you go.”

Spencer grabbed her wrist, taking her to the other side of the van and away from the prying eyes of their peers. Before she could ask what he needed, Spencer leaned down and kissed her lips. Ava smiled into the affection, opening her mouth to grant his tongue access. Yep, she definitely missed him; so much so that she was a bit disappointed when Spencer pulled away. She smirked, a bit breathless as she spoke.

“Thank god you caught me before I left.” 

Spencer chuckled. “Good luck out there. Don’t let Aiden push you around too much.”

“You don’t have to worry about that.”

With one last peck, Spencer slipped back towards the gate, hoping to avoid a lecture from his mom. Ava couldn’t help but feel like a giddy schoolgirl as she loaded one last bag. She forgot what it was like to have a man in her life, someone to mess around and laugh with. Having a guy wasn’t everything to her, she was fine before Spencer and Ava knew she would be fine after, but it was pure fun. Ava hoped Enid got to experience the same feeling—but only after she turns thirty, of course.

“Daylight’s burning!” Aiden called from the driver’s seat.

Ava walked out of the Armory just as Maggie and Glenn finished their goodbye kiss. She took a deep breath, ready to leave her dignity behind when Deanna gently took her by the hand. Ava turned, looking down at the woman who looked up at her with grateful eyes.

“I know I said it before but…thank you.”

She didn’t need to ask what for. Aiden needed to be kicked down a notch, and Ava was happy to be the one to do it. Ava smiled, nodding at the two parents.

“You too.”

Deanna gave her hand a squeeze. “And, when you see him, tell Spencer he isn’t fooling anyone.”

Ava couldn’t fight the blush that overcame her features. Deanna merely laughed, clearly amused by the reaction she received. Ava gave an embarrassed smile as she walked past Maggie, the Greene girl hiding her own laughter as she nodded to Ava.

 “You guys be careful out there.”

“Always am.” Ava nodded before offering a playful expression. “And stop laughing.”

Maggie shrugged, still smiling as Ava hopped into the van and closed the doors behind her. While Aiden and Nicholas rode up front, the newbies were confined to the back and sitting on the floor. Ava took the spot next to Noah, her back against the wall as she double-checked the silencer on her gun.

“Seriously though,” Tara spoke up, her eyes on Noah. “What’s her name?”

When Ava saw the way Noah looked down, she caught on to what the teasing was about. As she continued to check on her weapon, Ava began to hum the classic wedding march, the tune making Tara laugh while Noah looked mortified.

“What?” Ava teased, making Glenn smile. “It’s a good song.”

 “It is.” Noah turned to Ava. “Should we start singing it for you and Spencer?”

Ava looked down at her weapon while Glenn and Tara performed a chorus of ‘oohs’. Ava couldn’t contain her smile, or blush, as Noah began humming the melody as well. She then looked up, giving him a teasing warning.

“Respect your elders, kid.”

Tara leaned back, her mischievous gaze now on Ava. “No, I want to talk more about this.”

Before Ava could form a response, music began to blare through the van, signaling their departure. Though, the term ‘music’ to describe the noise was too generous. The scream-o soundtrack was used to lure the dead away from Alexandria and, for today, to help Ava get out of talking about Spencer. She feigned an expression of sadness.

“Ah man,” Her voice was raised over the music. “Just when I was about to give you the juicy details.”

Tara waved Ava off, but gave a look that told her the conversation was far from over. Ava merely smiled as she rested her head against the wall, closing her eyes to drown out the music.

* * *

 

The van slowed to a stop in front of a collection of warehouses, Ava catching a sign on top of one of them that stated it used to be a factory, and storage, for items sold in home improvement stores. When she and Enid were alone, they always passed these kinds of buildings with no intention to stop; Ava figured she would have to get used to coming to big warehouses like these for Alexandria’s needs.

“Looks like that door is our fastest way in and out.” Aiden nodded to the side entrance.

Ava shook her head as she surveyed the area. For someone who has apparently been doing runs since Alexandria was created, Aiden still wanted to jump the gun like a newbie. She just hoped his pride wouldn’t stop him from listen to her—or anyone else. She turned to him, a frown on her face.

“We should know all the exits first.”

“Ava’s right.” Glenn nodded, his thoughts towards Aiden mirroring Ava’s. “We need a backup plan in case things go south.”

“Alright, I got one.” Nicholas scoffed, “It’s called going out the front.”

Nicholas chuckled as he turned back to Aiden, his smile instantly following when he saw his unamused friend staring back at him. Ava looked over at Glenn, wondering if he saw Aiden’s expression as well. He merely shrugged in response, as if telling Ava not to get her hopes up. He had a point; even if she came up with the good ideas, Aiden would no doubt take credit for them. Her thoughts were silenced when Noah shot an approaching walker, a perfect shot to the forehead making it tumble to the ground. Ava smiled, more than impressed with the shot. She wasn’t the only one as Aiden handed him a rifle.

“Look at you with the aim.” Aiden smirked before glancing at Ava and Glenn. “They’re right. We should do a perimeter check.”

Aiden’s gaze fell on Ava, as if waiting for a pat on the back for going with her plan. If he wanted her to sing his praises, Aiden would be waiting for a long time. She ignored the glare from Nicholas as she began her trek around the building. Noah joined her while Glenn teamed up with Tara and Eugene, giving the girl the backup she would need with an inept partner.

Ava and Noah were quiet as they walked the perimeter, taking out a few Walkers as they went. When they had a moment of peace, Ava’s gaze fell to the gun in his hand. She then focused up ahead.

“That was good aim back there.”

“Target practice helped.” Noah nodded, a grin on his face. “Actually, I was pretty close to practicing on Aiden last week.”

A low laugh escaped Ava’s throat, “Get in line.”

Noah joined in with his own chuckles as Ava shook her head. Noah then grew quiet, a small smile still evident as he turned to Ava.

“I know you’re probably the last person that needs it but…we have your back out here.”

Ava blinked at the realization that seemed to come out of nowhere. She looked over at him, searching his face to see if it was a joke. However, he was looking at her with an expression of genuinely Ava thought was long gone in this world.  It didn’t go unnoticed by Ava how much quicker she adapted to the new group, and how they seemed drawn to her, and vice versa. They knew what was out there, and why Alexandria had to be more secure. With them around, Ava finally felt like the community would have a chance.

“Yours too.” Ava grinned. “Not like you need it either.”

Noah chuckled, but Ava knew that he was aware of the seriousness of the statement. She bit her lip, thinking just how pissed Enid would be if she knew what Ava just promised. Her worries about Enid were quickly replaced when a chorus of growls reached Ava’s ears. The pair walked up to the chain-link fence, Ava’s jaw slightly unhinged when she saw the herd mingling by the front door. Ava kept her eyes on the herd before sighing.

“Well, there goes Nicholas’ only plan.”

* * *

 

Glenn took up the front of the group as they maneuvered their way inside the warehouse, guns up and flashlights trained on the darkness before them. Ava and Tara took up the back of the group, Ava’s eyes narrowed as she looked for any sign of a threat. She listened for any disturbance—even if it was just a mop clattering to the ground. Although her defenses were up, Ava hadn’t felt this calm in weeks. She was in her element out here, and it just felt good to be doing something she knew she excelled at.

Glenn suddenly stopped walking, hushing the group behind him. It only took Ava a moment to hear what made him pause; the groaning of Walkers. It sounded like a small group, but any size was too much. However, Ava could pick up a struggle.

“They’re stuck behind something.” She whispered, just loud enough for the group to hear.

Aiden turned to Ava, “How do you know?”

“Just a guess.” Ava shrugged, “But they’re not here.”

Even in the darkness, Ava could feel Aiden’s eyeroll. She didn’t feed into his childlike behavior; it was time to be the bigger person, as much as Ava hated it. The group continued down their path, going in and out of aisles, stepping over discarded boxes. Before any of them could get too comfortable, a Walker jumped towards them, only to be stopped by a chain-link fence.

Ava watched as more began to join the dead one, the Walkers pushing at the fence as they tried to get to the living. Ava kept her gun trained as they walked past the fence, Aiden next to her. When Glenn quietly announced that the area was clear, Aiden spoke.

“You know your stuff, Princess.”

“I have to.” Ava explained. “It was just Enid and I out there.”

Traveling as a pair was dangerous in this world, but it made Ava’s senses sharpen. It was either that or get eaten in the middle of the night. The group dispersed, Tara taking Eugene to find the unit while Glenn and Ava walked on the other side of their aisle. Noah kept watch at the end of each aisle while Nicholas and Aiden stayed stationed at the front.

“We found ‘em!” Tara’s voice was hushed, but excited.

Ava and Glenn stopped at the box in between Tara and Eugene. After reading the label to make sure the boxes matched, Ava got her knife out and began cutting open the cardboard, taking out the unit. Glenn grinned, looking just as impressed—and relieved—as Ava. Not only did Eugene come through, but they might just be able to get home before noon. Ava had just finished filling up Glenn’s backpack when the unmistakable sound of a silent bullets made her pause. She quickly zipped up Glenn’s bag, the man following her as they peeked through the shelves.

Aiden continued to fire at an approaching Walker, the dead one dressed in army garb. However, from Ava’s vantage point, she could tell he was well-protected beneath the fabric.

“He’s got armor.” Glenn warned. “Let him come closer.”

The shooter shook his head. “I got him.”

Ava scoffed, unable to hide her disapproval. Not even the sharpest shooter could kill a Walker with armor on, and yet Aiden wanted to waste ammo. The next bullet caught the roamer in the knees, causing him to fall to the ground. Ava crouched, noticing something glimmer on its’ shirt. Her eyes went wide when she realized what it was.

“Aiden, cut it out!”

He either didn’t hear or chose not to listen as he fired multiple bullets to the chest. Ava began to shake, not caring that her voice was at an unreasonable volume when she screamed the only warning she could.

“Grenade!”

The explosion drowned out her words as the room illuminated in white light. The blast sent Ava backwards, her body colliding with something before falling to the concrete ground, the harsh light replaced by darkness. 


	11. The Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The run goes wrong. Enid senses she's being watched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had this done and wanted to put it out there! I move back into uni tomorrow, and school starts the 21st, so updates may be a bit slower. Hope you don't mind! <3

Ava woke up coughing, her lungs desperate to get the smoke out of them. When she opened her eyes, she was greeted by a scene that could only be described as a nightmare. The air was thick with smoke and dust, the ground covered in packaging debris. However, the most terrifying element of it all was the silence. She had to find the others, to make sure they were alive. If they weren’t, Ava would have to take their bodies out of here. There was no way she was leaving anyone behind in this hellhole.

“Sorry Enid.” Ava whispered to herself.

Slowly, Ava got to her feet. Her legs were sore—hell, her entire body was screaming. She swallowed the pain; there would be time for it after she got out of here. Ava shook her flashlight, the bulb flickering back to life as she scanned the area.

“Anyone?” Her voice was hushed, but loud enough to be heard. "Make a noise."

“Over here.”

Ava whipped around, the beam of light landing on Glenn’s form down the aisle from her. He was on his hands and knees, moaning in pain. Ava ignored the sound, a small smile taking over her face. He was alive, and that’s all that mattered. She made her way over, using her free hand to pull the man to his feet. Ava scanned his body, only seeing a few scraps and cuts.

“Please tell me you’re not bleeding.”

“I’m fine.” Glenn coughed, his eyes filled with concern. “Are you?”

She nodded. Ava felt like she got run over a truck, but she was breathing. That was all Glenn needed to know. Ava looked around, hoping to find more of their people.

“Oh, god.”

Nicholas’ shaking voice made the pair walk out of the aisle. Ava angled her flashlight towards his voice, the light illuminating Nicholas’ body. He was standing, his back turned to them. Ava moved the light to follow his eye line, her eyes widening at the sight of Aiden impaled by two metal beams; one through the shoulder, and the other poking out of his stomach. His eyes were closed, mouthing hanging open in a position that could only be described as ‘dead’.

Ava sighed as Glenn mumbled a swear. Aiden was a prick, and it was his foolishness that put them in this situation, but no one deserved to die like that. They would mourn back in Alexandria but for now, they needed to find the others. Glenn took out his own flashlight, calling out the names of his friends while Ava looked around as well. She could see the silhouettes of the dead walking, but they couldn’t see her. At least, not yet.

“Here!”

Ava followed the voice down an aisle, and she peeked through the boxes to find a terrified Eugene looking back at her. Ava felt bad for him; they were so close to getting out of here, and now they were stuck. He looked down, and Ava moved over to see what caught his eye. The beam of her light landed on Tara, the woman laying on the ground unconscious. Ava cringed when she saw the wound on her head, the amount of blood staggering.

“Is she alive?” Ava asked, looking over at the shaking Eugene. She was growing impatient. “Eugene!”

He jolted. “I, uh, can’t tell from here.”

She resisted the urge to kick the shelf. Ava wanted nothing more than for Tara to pop up, awake and ready to make a joke. Instead, the sounds of approaching growling and gurgling filled the air; they didn’t have much time. Rapid footsteps made Ava turn around, relief flooding her chest when she saw Glenn with Noah. The younger boy nodded towards her, a silent way of saying he was glad to see her. 

“Tara’s out cold.” Ava informed them, shining her light on her. “I can’t see if she’s breathing.”

“Walker!”

The trio pressed themselves to the shelf, Ava watching as a member of the dead maneuvered right towards Eugene. Glenn’s jaw clenched.

“It’s yours, Eugene.” He encouraged. “Take it out.”

Shakily, Eugene aimed his pistol, the barrel moving with each of his nerves. Ava sent a silent prayer up to whoever was listening. That if Eugene were to take one walker out, let it be this one. The genius never got a chance to prove himself when another one jumped at him from behind, causing him to fall to the ground.

Ava didn’t waste a moment as she squeezed between two boxes, going into Eugene’s aisle. She pulled out her knife before grabbing his attacker by the neck, pulling the snarling roamer off his body. Once the walker was angled towards her, Ava shoved her knife through its temple, ending its’ suffering. As she threw the corpse to the side, Glenn climbed through the shelf and fired a bullet at the other approaching walker. Noah came through after, helping Ava get Eugene to his feet. Once the moment settled, Glenn turned to Ava.

“Take them to the office,” He gestured to the corner room. “I’ll grab Tara.”

Ava nodded, allowing Eugene and Noah to go first as she covered their backs. Once they were inside, she went to go collect Nicholas. They were in this together now, and Ava would be damned if she let anyone else die on her watch.

* * *

 

Enid was the first one out of her seat when class was dismissed. It was the only point in the lesson she took in, though she wouldn’t tell Ava that. She wouldn’t tell Ava that she hopped the wall either, or that she had her own spot in the woods that she liked to hang out in. To be alone and listen to the world run its course.

However, as she doodled in her blank notebook, Enid knew she wasn’t alone. Carl thought he was good at keeping a low profile. Enid had to give him credit; he kept his distance. He would’ve fooled her if he hadn't been stepping on twigs, snapping them in half. One thing Enid couldn’t figure out was what he wanted. This was the third time he came out here to watch her, but Carl never approached.

Enid wasn’t complaining, she preferred the distance. Yet, she couldn’t deny that her interest was piqued. She looked forward to the day that he grew past his fear of her.

* * *

 

“How’s she doing?”

Ava ignored the walkers banging on the glass as she waited for Eugene to answer Glenn’s question. When they found out she was breathing, Ava cleared the items on the metal desk to give the boys room to lay Tara down. Ava tried not to get too excited when Glenn said she was alive. Alive didn’t mean healthy, or that her heart would be beating in ten minutes time.

“She has serious head trauma,” Eugene reported. “She’s losing blood fast.”

Ava gave herself a second to feel sad before jumping into finding a solution. “What do we do to stop it?”

“There’s a med kit in the van.” Nicholas spoke for the first time.

Noah nodded, the gesture frantic. Ava recalled the teasing between Noah and Tara, the strong friendship between them. Losing her wasn’t an option for him, and Ava could tell by the reassurance in his next statement. 

“Let’s get her there.”

The group huddled around her, ready to pick her up when painful moans filled the air—human moans. Nicholas moved to the window, the man letting out a gasp. Ava joined him, her eyes widening at the sight of Aiden moving, his face twisted in agony as he struggled.

“I checked him.” Nicholas blinked, “I thought he was dead.”

Ava looked at his situation. Aiden was impaled in two different points of his body, and there was a small herd right outside the office. The moment they moved, the dead would catch on and follow them. She sighed. They needed as many people as possible if they wanted to bring Aiden home.

“It’s going to take four of us,” Ava looked to Glenn. “Two to cover, two to get him out.”

Glenn nodded before turning to Eugene. “How much time do we have?”

“We pull Aiden off there, we could kill him.” Nicholas interjected before Eugene could speak.

Noah narrowed his eyes. “You’re saying we should leave him?”

Ava couldn’t believe it herself. Nicholas was supposed to be Aiden’s friend, his backup, and he seemed unaffected by the idea of leaving him to the dead. Ava was far from Aiden’s biggest fan, and she was more than ready to risk her life.

“Go, save him!” Eugene interrupted her thoughts, the man looking down at Tara. “She’d do it. I know she would. I’ll stay with her and keep her safe. I assure you.”

Ava looked at Noah and Glenn, the two people who knew Eugene better than anyone in this room. If they trusted him to watch Tara, there was no reason that Ava shouldn’t.

“All right, we’ll knock them back. You still have that flare?” Glenn pointed at Nicholas, the man nodding. “Fire it over the shelves, it’ll lead them away. Noah, Ava—we’ll get the rest hand to hand.”

Ava pulled her knife out as they walked over to the door, bracing herself behind Glenn and Nicholas. Adrenaline pumped through her veins, preparing herself for whatever waited for them beyond the door. Glenn put his hand on the knob before looking between the three.

“Ready?”

* * *

 

Enid waited a few minutes after Carl left before making her trek back into Alexandria’s walls. She wanted to spend forever out there, but Ava should be home any moment. Enid didn’t want to miss her arrival. As she walked back to the house, a voice caught her attention.

“Enid, hold up a second.”

She froze as Rick Grimes came walking up behind her, dawning the windbreaker that signaled he was the constable. Enid feared that Carl went to his dad, telling him her secret. Or worse, he saw her come back over the walls herself.

“Hi, Mr. Grimes.”

“You can call me Rick, you know.”

“Right, sorry.” Enid smiled.

Rick took the girl in. It was staggering how much Enid looked like Ava, the big brown eyes being the most distinguishing feature between them. He could tell she was much more reserved than the older girl; Glenn had told him how Ava was cautious about Alexandria, but Enid seemed to hold the community entirely in a negative light.

“You wouldn’t happen to know anything about Jesse’s owl statue, would you?” He asked, feeling a little silly. “It got destroyed this morning.”

Enid stopped herself from sighing in relief. She wasn’t caught. “No, I don’t. Sorry.”

“It’s fine, thank you.” Rick pursed his lips. “I know Ava will be gone for most of the day so…if you want to have dinner with Carl, Judith, and I, you’re welcome to.”

Enid blinked, stunned by the sudden invitation. She could tell Rick felt just as uncomfortable offering it. He was trying to fit in, to get used to the status quo, but it felt foreign. Sadly, Enid was just fine being herself.

“Thanks, but I’m already eating with Denise.” She lied.

Rick nodded, and Enid was sure she saw a glint of relief. “No problem. Next time.”

He waved before walking down the street, off to interrogate more people about an ugly statue. Once he was out of earshot, Enid scoffed.

Yeah, next time.

* * *

 

Ava didn’t know it was possible, but Aiden looked even worse up close. His skin was paling, sweat glistening on his forehead. He looked awful, but they could get him free—if time was on their side. Glenn and Nicholas instantly went over to Aiden while Ava and Noah kept their backs to them. Ava replaced her knife for her gun, her eyes on the walkers across the warehouse as they mingled around the flare.

Aiden’s scream of pain echoed through the building as they attempted to pull him off. The noise was deafening, making a few rotting heads turn to them. Ava cringed, feeling her heart rate accelerate when she noticed the light dying out.

“The flare is starting to burn out.” She called back to Glenn before looking at Noah. “Get ready.”

Noah nodded, raising his gun. The boy seemed to be ready for anything, while Nicholas was the exact opposite.

“We’re not going to make it.” The man's voice shook, the fear growing in each word.

Glenn’s solid tone was next. “Yes, we are. But only if you keep it together, alright?”

Nicholas’ agreement was drowned out by the growling walkers. Ava began shooting, taking out the closer ones while Noah handled the distance. It was a good system, but Ava knew it couldn’t last as she reloaded her gun. They didn’t have enough ammo for the massive number heading their way. Her anxiety escalated when Nicholas ran past her, apologizing as he made his way to the exit. Ava shook her head, unable to believe what she just witnessed.

He left them. He just walked out.

“They’re coming!” Noah informed.

Glenn pulled. “Ava, help!”

Ava shot a few more walkers before looking to Noah, the boy nodding. “Go, I got this.”

That was all she needed as she slipped her gun back in the holster and making her way to Aiden. On Glenn’s cue, Ava pulled him towards her body, the man letting out an agonizing scream. Ava was ready for round two when Aiden placed a hand on Ava’s arm, pulling her close to him.

“It was us. The others before.” Aiden’s gaze pierced Ava’s own. “They didn’t panic. We did. You were right about us, Princess.”

Ava’s eyes went wide. Aiden and Nicholas weren’t just foolish, they were deserters. They let their own die, and came back to Alexandria acting like heroes. It made her sick, but that didn’t matter right now. Ava wasn’t them—she would get him home. Despite hearing the confession, Glenn seemed to agree as the pair went to pull on his body again. This time, Aiden put a hand on both of them.

“No.”

She realized what this was. Aiden confessed his sin, and he was ready to accept the consequence. Ava looked over at Glenn, the man looking just as shook. However, neither had time to say anything when Noah came up behind them, grabbing each by their packs.

“They’re here!”

He pulled them away, Ava looking at Aiden for as long as she could. His gaze remained on her as the dead descended on him, ripping his body apart. Once Aiden was out of sight, Ava slipped out of Noah’s grip and began to run with them, her eyes finding Nicholas as the trio ran to catch up with him. When Ava realized he was going to the front, she yelled.

“You’ll never make it!”

Nicholas ignored her as he went through the revolving door and right into a herd. Ava let out a yell of frustration as she turned around, joining Glenn in at firing at the Walkers who were coming down the hall.  When her gun clicked empty, she sighed.

“I’m out!”

“Me too,” Glenn gestured to the door. “Come on!”

They went to go out just as Nicholas tried to get back in. The herd on the outside clamored the get in, only to be stopped by the glass as the ones inside mirrored their fate. Ava fell to the floor while Glenn’s back went to one side and Noah to the other. They were trapped, both exits leading to death.

“Maybe we can shoot past them!” Nicholas yelled, his voice echoing against the glass. “You guys still have guns.”

Ava’s jaw clenched. They wouldn’t even be in this mess if Nicholas hadn’t left them to the dead. She got to her knees, glaring at him.

“And you have the ammo!”

“We have to do something!” Nicholas yelled. “We’ll die in here!”

 He wasn’t wrong. Ava stood up, feeling down the middle of the revolving door for a weak point while Glenn pushed his door towards the walkers. It was then Aiden’s familiar mix filled the air, and Ava went to Glenn’s door to see Eugene driving the van, honking the horn as he worked to distract the walkers. The dead ones outside began to follow the van, Eugene driving it towards the back of the warehouse. Ava raised a brow; she didn’t know he had it in him. Judging from the bubbling laughter erupting from Noah and Glenn, she knew she wasn’t the only one having the thought.

“Hey! Nicholas!” Glenn banged on the glass, earning his attention. “You and Noah need to keep the door steady. Ava and I are going to break the glass. We get out, you push out. All right?”

They agreed. Using the butt of her gun, Ava began hitting the bulletproof glass, Glenn copying the movements as Noah and Nicholas kept the door steady. When the glass began to crack, the door slightly pushed open.

“Stop!” Nicholas shouted. “It’s not safe!”

“It’s the only way!” Ava shouted back, “You can hold it. You can!”

Glenn kept his gaze locked. “Trust me. Count of three—one, two…”

“No!”

Nicholas pushed his door towards the exit, the trio breaking out into indistinct yelling. Ava slammed on the glass—both in anger and trying to get a way out before Nicholas made it impossible.

“Nicholas, stop!” Noah yelled, struggling. “Dammit!”

Ava turned to Noah, the boy now on the ground with his feet planted on the glass, struggling to keep the door closed. Through the opening, the walkers began to reach for him, and Ava abandoned her own plan to drop to the ground to help.

“Don’t do it!” Glenn yelled.

But it was too late. Nicholas got free and the dead didn’t waste their chance grabbing onto Noah’s ankle. Ava let out a yell as she held onto Noah’s hand, stopping him from sliding through the door. Even with both of her hands grabbing his, Ava could feel the intense hold of the dead; their need for flesh outweighing her physical strength. Glenn’s arm went past her body, holding onto Noah’s wrist as his other hand kept a hold on the door’s bar. Noah looked between the two, his eyes wide with desperation.

“Don’t let go!” He begged.

The pair let out a scream as the herd began to overpower them. Before long, Noah was pulled through the door, his hand sliding out of both of their grips. Ava yelled as she fell backwards into Glenn, the pair now a tangled set of limbs. Ava sprang up, trying to get to Noah, but it was too late. The door was pinned closed by the walkers as they gathered around his body. Glenn got on his hands and knees, crawling towards the door before slamming his hand on the glass.

“Noah!” He let out a guttural scream, the sound making Ava’s stomach turn.

It was then Noah’s form was pressed against the glass, Ava jumping back in horror as the herd began ripping him apart right before their eyes. Glenn slowly backed up, shaking. Ava knew he was crying. She was on the verge, the tears falling when his screams finally stopped. Snarls and growls filled the air as the pair sat in silence, Glenn leaning on the door behind him as Ava kept her eyes on the herd. She couldn’t look away. The sight made her sick, and angry. Furious. However, as she turned to Glenn, Ava knew these emotions didn’t have a place here—not now.

Now, Ava had to be sure Glenn made it home.

“Glenn, hey.” Her voice was quiet.

Glenn looked towards Ava, the girl now crouched in front of him, effectively blocking Noah’s demise. He noticed the tears in her eyes, the blood mixing with the liquid as it ran down her cheeks. He couldn’t speak, and her eyes filled with sadness at the realization. Ava hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder.

“It’s time to go.”    

With a sniffle, Glenn nodded. Ava stood up first before offering him her hand, both of their palms stained with crimson as she pulled him to his feet. They didn’t look back as they went through the revolving door, Ava keeping her eye on Glenn as they walked next to one another, following the muffled sound of the van’s music. She wanted to say something to him, but her words would come up short. She hadn’t known Noah for long, but he was a good kid. Ava could tell he had a big heart, but he didn’t let his emotions get in the way of doing what was best for him—and his group. Noah was one of the beautiful ones, and his death was caused by pure cowardice.

The van came into view just in time for Ava to see Nicholas throw Eugene to the ground. Before she could think to react, Glenn took off running towards the scene, Ava following him. She reached them just as Glenn pulled Nicholas out of the driver’s seat and to the concrete. Ava’s stare was cold as she watched him punch the coward repeatedly until he was unconscious. She could resist spitting on his face; he deserved worse, but knowing Alexandria, this was the only punishment he was going to get.  

“Help me get him in the back.” Glenn’s voice broke as he addressed Eugene.

Eugene looked back towards the building before settling on Glenn. “Where’s Noah?”

Glenn didn’t answer, his lip quivering as he walked to the back of the van. Eugene then looked over at Ava, waiting for her to confirm the worst.

“Noah?” He asked again, hoping.

Ava’s jaw set, her frustration shining through as she glared down at Nicholas.

“He killed him.”  

* * *

 

The drive home was silent, Ava’s knuckles white as she gripped onto the steering wheel. Glenn sat in the passenger seat, his eyes glazed as he looked out the window. Eugene sat in the back, monitoring Tara’s condition—the girl still unconscious. Ava was sure she heard Nicholas wake up, but the man read the room and remained quiet. He was shocked to see Ava and Glenn sitting in the front; anyone else would’ve died in their situation. Ava hoped he was nervous, she hoped he laid awake tonight, thinking about what he had done.

However, according to Aiden’s last confession, this wasn’t his first time. She was sure he would continue sleeping like a baby tonight while Ava clenched at her blanket, thinking about what she could’ve done differently.

They pulled into Alexandria after dark, Denise and Pete already waiting to take Tara back to the office thanks to Eugene using Nicholas' radio. Ava noticed Enid’s presence as well, her form running towards the van but stopping next to Deanna and Reg. Her heart clenched—Aiden’s parents, the ones who spoke love to him before he left. From the looks on their faces, Ava knew they sensed something wrong.

“What happened?” Deanna asked as she watched Tara get rolled away. “Where’s Aiden? Nicholas?”

Ava looked behind her as Nicholas slowly approached, his cheeks slightly bruised from Glenn’s punches. Glenn’s fist clenched at his side, and Ava gave him a sympathetic look; a look that displayed her understanding, but warned him of aggression.

“I’m sorry.” Nicholas frowned, his voice quivering. “I’m so sorry.”

Deanna’s eyes slightly widened, and she looked over at Ava and Glenn, waiting for them to tell her that this was a hoax. A cruel joke. Glenn looked down, his own tears falling as Ava only shook her head, her emotions clearly evident on her expression. Ava waited for her to say something, anything, but nothing came. Instead, the woman turned around and walked away, Reg trailing behind her.

When she was gone, Nicholas turned to Ava and Glenn. He opened his mouth to speak, but Ava shut it down. The last thing she needed was to hear his excuses. There was no excuse for this.

“Don’t you dare.” She warned.

Nicholas ignored her. “You two need to understand--.”

“Do you want to get knocked on your ass again?” Ava spat. “Walk away.”

Slightly terrified, Nicholas backed away and walked further into Alexandria. Ava didn’t notice Maggie’s presence until she went up to Glenn, and Ava took the opportunity to give them space and head to Enid. The teen met Ava halfway, her eyes full of worry.

“What the hell happened?”

Ava looked around and grabbed Enid by the shoulder, gently pushing her towards the house. Enid understood and, as they walked, Ava could tell she was keeping an ear out as well. Ava recounted the whole story, watching Enid’s range of emotions—and slightly horrified when there was none.

“But you’re okay?” She asked when the story finished, the pair now sitting on the porch.

Ava blinked. “Yeah. Considering.”

“We have to get used to this, Ava.” Enid explained. “People die all the time now...and these people? They’ve been closed off for too long to survive out there.”

Ava frowned. The survivalist in her knew Enid was right—the inept would die quick. But Noah wasn’t an Alexandrian. He was a survivor, his death the direct cause of someone else’s fear. Tara’s injury was from their desperate need to prove themselves. She always told Enid that they would handle themselves if Alexandria were to fall, but what could they do if they were out there with them? If the cowardly had the power to control their fate?

“I know.” Ava agreed. “I just didn’t expect it to be so easy for them to take us down."

* * *

 

Ava and Enid said their good nights after the conversation, the younger exhausted from her day of schooling. Ava should’ve been ready to collapse herself, but her adrenaline that was powered by anger kept her awake. She needed to do something, and she knew just what. After cleaning herself up a bit, Ava went to the house where she knew she would get the help she needed.

It took two knocks for Rick to answer. Despite the late hour, he still wore his officer windbreaker, as if a reminder that he was always on duty.  He didn’t need to ask why she was here as he stepped onto the porch, closing the door behind him. Carl and Judith were sleeping upstairs, and he didn’t need either of them waking up. Not when he had to figure out his next step.

“I’m sorry.” Ava spoke first, her voice slightly hoarse.

She was sorry for a lot lately. Sorry for losing Noah, for losing Aiden. She was most sorry for letting Nicholas live. The bone in Rick’s jaw clenched momentarily, and Ava could see how he was attempting to remain hardened.

“Tell me what happened.”

Ava didn't need to be told twice.

“Aiden started shooting at the walker. I saw the grenades, tried to stop him, but he wouldn’t. He just kept shooting until they exploded.” Rick rested his hand on the banister as Ava went on. “Nicholas told us he was dead, but then we heard him screaming. The four of us could’ve gotten him out of there. We were close, then Nicholas panicked. Ran right past me.”

Rick kept his gaze on her, noting how her story matched Glenn’s perfectly. Ava swallowed a lump in her throat, remembering the terror behind Aiden’s eyes that soon transformed into acceptance.

“I started helping Glenn when Aiden stopped us. He whispered to me that he and Nicholas left their old run group to die. He refused to be saved after that.” Ava shivered. “We went to the lobby and got trapped in the revolving door. All Nicholas had to do was hold the door, but he panicked. I had Noah. I had him. I _tried_.”

Ava met Rick’s gaze, taken back to see the softness in it. The look was reminiscent of the one Noah gave her when he said they had her back. Ava told him the same, and she didn’t. Ava failed him, and that would haunt her forever. She was back in that revolving door, trapped. Ava felt her chest constrict, tears threatening to fall.  

“All we could do was watch.” Ava’s voice broke.

She looked down, ashamed to show emotion to a man she barely knew. A man who knew the deceased better than she ever would. Ava despised herself. What gave her the right to cry for Noah? The feeling only got worse when she felt Rick’s hand on her shoulder, the touch gentle and comforting. Ava didn’t deserve it.

“This isn’t on you.” He reassured, his voice quiet. “They don’t know what they’re doing. Any of them.”

Ava knew that the moment she stepped behind the gates, but it had never been so clear to her until today. She wiped a few tears before looking up at Rick.

“I came here to save Enid. Stayed here so she could have some semblance of a life.” Ava explained. “But they don’t understand that this isn’t what life is like. Not out there, not anywhere. I’m afraid they won’t catch up until it’s too late.”

The words toppled out of Ava like a waterfall. She had been holding them back for too long, and Rick was the first person who looked ready to listen.

“They may never be ready.” Rick shook his head. “But we are, and we don’t answer to them.”

His hand gently dropped from Ava’s shoulder, the girl only nodding in response. Today was the first and last time she would let someone from Alexandria have power over her. Ava only answered to herself now. However, as she looked at the determined expression on Rick’s face, she realized she wouldn’t mind answering to him either.


	12. Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava and Enid deal with the aftermath of the run. Ava finds herself in the middle of a grand plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! School started, and I've been busy with that and work. Oh the joys of being a senior :).

Deanna summoned for Ava the next morning, the leader ready to hear her take on what happened. Ava tried not to show how nervous she was as she sat across from Deanna. The woman who once looked at her with shining eyes and a kind smile now only held an expression of contempt. Ava took in the dark circles under her eyes, the thin line that was her lips as she questioned Ava. The death of her son has clearly broken her, but also put a fire in her stomach. Deanna needed to understand what happened—and who was to blame. Ava’s voice was low as she repeated what she told Rick the night before; this time she didn’t breakdown. Ava had the entire night to cry.

Deanna didn’t say a word, barely even moving as she listened to Ava’s tale. When the story concluded, Ava waited for Deanna to say something. The longer the silence stretched, the more Ava prepared to be screamed at, or to get exiled on the spot. Yet, nothing came. Instead, Deanna spoke calmly as she told Ava that she wasn’t allowed outside the walls or to check out a gun until the situation was handled.

“They’re trying to phase us out.” Enid paced in the living room after Ava gave her a rundown of what happened. “Make you the defenseless one.”

Ava shook her head. “They’re not that cunning. Trust me.”

“We should’ve left when we had the chance.”

Ava didn’t answer, and the silence unnerved Enid. The young girl left the house, and Ava just knew she would be running through the woods alone to work out the stress. Ava didn’t care, and Enid had a point. Maybe they should’ve left on their own terms, because now Ava felt like she was just waiting to be dragged into the night.

* * *

 

The woods welcomed Enid with open arms, the girl already feeling better the more distance she put between herself and Alexandria. She took in the air, letting it fill her lungs. Everything felt clear out here; safer. Safer than being trapped behind walls with fools who had no idea what they were doing. Enid was right, she knew she always was. She should’ve dragged Ava out of the Community when they could’ve left with their dignity. Enid scoffed. They could’ve robbed them blind before they hopped the fence. Hell, doing that might help the Alexandrians eventually. It would have taught them to step up.

Enid’s delusions of grandeur were interrupted when the sound of a twig snapping filled the air. She took off, hiding behind a tree. When she peeked out, Enid was glad not to be disappointed. Carl maneuvered through the forest, his eyes searching the area; she grinned, knowing he was looking for her. On any other day, Enid would ignore him. Today, she needed a distraction from her sister’s impending doom.

“Carl.” She called, retreating into hiding. Enid heard him stop. “I know you’re following me. Again.” Enid peeked, hiding a snicker when she only saw his back. “You’re going the wrong way.”

He turned, missing Enid sink back into hiding. Carl walked forward, following where her voice once was.

“You knew?”

She smiled. “You’re very loud.” Enid frowned. “Can you go back? You scare me.”

Although the boy had awful stealth maneuvers, Enid still held a slither of fear towards him. Enid didn’t like that he knew what was out here. She didn’t like that he was like her.

“You shouldn’t sneak out here by yourself.” Carl noted. “Two people just died.”

Enid scoffed. If only Carl knew Aiden brought his death upon himself, or that Noah’s fate was sealed the moment Nicholas pulled his move of cowardice. Either way, death was nothing new, and the fact that Carl wanted her to go back because of it made her sick. Rolling her eyes, Enid stepped out from behind the tree, her sudden presence making Carl slightly jump.

“People die all the time. You know that.”

Carl pursed his lips, her words obviously hitting a nerve. “We should go back?”

“Why? So, I can sit around the house with Ava, waiting for us to get kicked out?”

Ever since arriving in Alexandria, Carl had to admit that he was falling hard for the Community. He liked being able to hang out with kids his age all day only to sleep in a bed at night. However, he knew it wasn’t the utopia Deanna sold it as—that fact becoming clear when he peeked out his window, catching a glimpse of Ava talking to his father on the porch. Rick assured Carl that Glenn and Ava wouldn’t be kicked out, but he was worried. He didn’t want to lose Glenn, and he wasn’t ready to lose the two girls he had barely gotten to know.

“What do you do out there anyway?” Carl glanced around the woods, looking for a pull.

Enid shrugged. “Same thing as you.”

Enid smiled before taking off through the woods, Carl grinning as he took off running behind her. The two ran at a leisurely pace, maneuvering through nature with wide smiles. Enid closed her eyes. She always ended up running when she came out here, imagining that Ava was next to her—like old times, the good times. In this moment, Enid didn’t need to imagine having a partner. Carl was here, and Enid felt much less alone.

* * *

 

Although Ava would’ve been content lying on the couch all day, she knew that was impossible. She had to find Spencer, to see how he was handling the news about Aiden. Ava guessed he wouldn’t be well, however, she was clueless when it came to how he would see her. Would Spencer blame Ava for Aiden’s death? Ava wouldn’t be surprised. Spencer wasn’t there, he didn’t see how determined Aiden was to take out the armored walker. For all he knew, Nicholas was telling the truth about Glenn and Ava leaving them to die.

Ava was ready to find out as she approached Spencer in Alexandria’s cemetery. Four pieces of wood stuck out of the ground; three graves for the bodies of the old, and one left empty to represent Aiden. The brother stared down at the ply wood, his eyes glistening with tears that he desperately began blinking away. Ava crossed her arms, suddenly feeling out of place. She kept her distance as she spoke.

“How are you holding up?”

Spencer kept his gaze downward. “How do you think?”

She cringed. It was a stupid question, but Ava was never good at approaching someone after they lost someone they loved. It was one of the reasons she kept her distance from Glenn today; the man needed a chance to process what he lost in Noah, and Ava knew her words wouldn’t help him through it. She looked down.

“I’m so sorry, Spencer.” Ava shook her head. “We tried. We wanted to bring him home--.”

“This is the last thing I want to hear, Ava.” Spencer finally turned to her. “I don’t want to listen about how you failed my brother. About how you failed me, my family.”

Ava frowned, stepping forward. “I thought you’d want to understand what happened.”

“Oh, I understand clearly.”

Ava blinked, her worst fears confirmed. Spencer didn’t blame the dead, or Nicholas, he blamed Ava. In his mind, she should’ve kept Aiden safe—she knew how to navigate the outside. Spencer may not totally believe Nicholas’ story, but he wouldn’t be shocked if Ava and Glenn left them. The pair had been out there for too long, and that bred selfishness. He had hoped Ava was different, but it was time to face reality. Ava was just as cold as Rick. She pursed her lips. She wanted to yell at him, to scream that it was Alexandria that ended Aiden, not her. She swallowed the anger, knowing it would only make it worse.

“You don’t.” Ava whispered. “But let me know when you’re ready to.”

With that, Ava left the cemetery, hoping her tears weren’t visible as she walked.

* * *

 

Enid brought Carl to her space in the woods, the girl taking her backpack off before taking a seat on a log. She smiled, a soft laugh escaping her lips as he took the spot next to her. Enid had never felt more free than today. She didn’t think she would like it, but she enjoyed Carl’s company. He understood that the dying world wasn’t a tragedy, but part of a cycle. A cycle they needed to witness.

“We’re supposed to be out here.” Enid completed her thought aloud. “We’re supposed to feel like this. I don’t want to forget it.”

Ava seemed content on forgetting what they went through, but Enid couldn’t. It was a part of her, and always would be. As much as Ava hated it, the outside was a part of her as well. It was why she wanted to be on the run group. Enid knew she missed it.

“I can’t forget.” Carl sighed. “I dream about it. Being in the forest with them.”

Enid’s smile faded, thinking of her own family. “I do, too.”

Every morning that she woke up in bed, Enid was disappointed. Her dreams of running with Ava, surviving with her, were all too vivid. The memories of Ava, and her parents, driving through the wilderness were fading. She wanted them to be stronger because it was the only chance they had to be together again. She often imagined the four of them off in the woods together; thriving. A dream that would never come true.

“Ron’s a good guy.”

The interruption made Enid escape the confines of her mind. She supposed her and Ron were a thing now; he did kiss her cheek the last time they saw each other. He tried to go for the lips, but she turned her head at the last moment. Instead of being upset, he laughed. Enid didn’t know what to make of it.

She nodded. “He is.”

“Does he know you come out here?”

“No.” Enid shook her head. “He wouldn’t understand.”

 Carl nodded. “Does Ava?’

Enid quietly laughed as she pulled out her knife—her Mom’s old one that Enid swiped while she hid in the car. Ava knew, but she didn’t care. Like Enid said, she knew Ava felt the same way as Enid, only she denied it.

“Yeah.” Enid began twisted in the knife in the log. “We were in this world together. She understands.”

“What happened to you two?”

She stared into nothing, remembering everything. Enid watched her parents die, watched Ava lose her mind as she killed their murderers. They slept outside; in the cold and rain seasons. They starved together, even when Ava begged Enid to eat the small rations she found. People tried to hurt them, use them. Enid closed her eyes. So much has happened, and she couldn’t find the words for the experience. Seeing that he was losing her, Carl looked down. Besides Deanna, he was probably the first person to ask her about the past; wanting nothing more than to learn more about her.

“It’s okay.” Carl’s voice kept her grounded. “Something bad happened to me, too.” 

Enid looked over at him, wondering what this boy had went through. Before he could say anything else, the sounds of snarling cut through the air. Enid stood up, Carl following as she led him to a hollowed-out tree, the space just big enough for the two of them. Carl watched as a small herd began to pass by, but all Enid could look at was him. This beautiful boy who understood her, who didn’t write off her pain the way Ron did. He cared, and Enid needed a genuine friend.

“It’s their world,” Enid whispered in his ear. “We’re just living in it.”

* * *

 

“How is she?”

Ava sat at Tara’s bedside, her gaze never leaving the bandage on the girl’s forehead. If it weren’t for the injury, or the beeping machines around her, Ava would assume that Tara was sleeping. She looked peaceful, as if she was getting her best slumber in years. She just hoped it wouldn’t become permanent. She only looked away when Denise held a mug out to her, Ava accepting the coffee but not drinking it. She didn’t exactly have an appetite after her conversation with Spender.

“Stable.” Denise answered, walking over to check Tara’s vitals. “We won’t know the true damage until she wakes up.”

Ava sighed. It wasn’t good news, but Ava knew it could’ve been worse if they kept her in the office. Eugene really came through when it came to taking care of Tara; Ava was shocked when he showed up in the van, the music blaring as he honked the horn. He had more courage than Nicholas and Aiden combined—she hoped his group knew that.

“How long are you banned from going outside the walls?” Denise asked as she pulled up a chair next to Ava.

“Whenever Deanna trusts me again, I guess.” Ava shook her head. “I’m going to miss it.”

Denise pursed her lips. “I wouldn’t know.”

The nurse had already told Ava that she barely spent any time out in the wild. Her only experience outside was driving to Alexandria when the Military directed her towards the neighborhood. Ava knew she couldn’t relate; not in the way Aaron or Daryl could, and they were both out on a recruitment mission. However, Ava noticed the whimsical tone in Denise’s voice, as if she wanted to see what the world became. Did she want to go out there?

“After my banishment lifts, do you want to go on a supply run with me?” Ava asked, testing the waters. “I mean, if I don’t get exiled.”

She let out a small laugh, making Ava smile for the first time today.

“You’re not getting exiled.” Denise reassured. “And…maybe. I dunno. I feel like I should, at least once, you know?”

Ava nodded. It was the reason she was going to miss going out there so much. Ava didn’t want to forget. 

“I know exactly what you mean.” She gave a small grin. “You don’t have to decide now. Just let me know later.”

Denise smiled at Ava before letting her eyes fall back on Tara. Her brows went up, the gesture making Ava slightly nervous; as if Denise could pick up a medical problem just from sight. She sat on the edge of her seat, waiting for the nurse to say anything.

“She’s pretty cute.”

The laugh that came out of Ava’s mouth was a much needed one.

* * *

 

After discussing with Denise the importance of making the patient healthy before asking them out on a date, Ava decided to head home for the day. She hoped Enid was waiting for her, especially after the way the two left it. Ava wanted her sister to know that they still made the right decision in staying. Even if they did get exiled, they could make it. They always made it.

When her porch came into view, Ava noticed that someone was waiting for her. Glenn sat on the steps, looking up when Ava approached. She could see the bags under his eyes, signaling that he had just as much sleep as she had the night before. She offered a small smile. Glenn mirroring it as he scooted to make room for her.

“I’m guessing you talked to Deanna.”

The man nodded. “I hear you’re banned, too.”

“It’s bullshit.” Ava felt her walls dissolve, her anger over the situation finally shining through. “We’re the ones who know what we’re doing.”

“They need to get their acts together.” Glenn agreed, his voice low as to not attract attention. “Noah believed in this place, and that’s good enough for me.”

Ava frowned, thinking of the open journal she saw in the back of the van. In Noah’s scrawny handwriting was a single sentence: _This is the beginning_.  While the rest of his group seemed hesitant, it sounded as if Noah believed he hit the jackpot when they rolled up to Alexandria. He wanted to make a difference, a life, and he got cheated out of it. It only seemed right for Glenn to want to honor his memory by becoming a part of the community.

“Thank you.” Glenn suddenly spoke, snapping Ava out of her thoughts. “For staying with us. For…trying to save him.”

Ava gave a small smile. “That’s what neighbors are for.”

“And friends.” He added with a shrug.

She looked at him, her eyes slightly wide. “Is that what we are?”

“That’s up to you.”

Glenn offered a small smile, and Ava could tell he was being genuine. After what they just been through, he trusted Ava to make the right calls, to be selfless. He told Rick about her determination to get Noah out alive, as well as Aiden, when she had only known both for a few weeks. The thought of leaving never crossed her mind, and he could tell. Ava smiled back, ready to speak when the sounds of screams filled the air. The pair glanced at one another before taking off towards the sounds; the combined noise of connecting punches and grunts. Ava’s stomach clenched when she realized they were heading straight towards Jessie’s house.

The scene in front of the home was brutal. The residents of Alexandria surrounded Rick as he straddled Pete, choking him in the middle of the street. Ava noticed the shards of glass littering the ground, her eyes going to the broken window. Jessie laid on the ground, Rosita doing her best to help her up and calm her down. It was then Carl ran into the action, Ava taking notice that he and Enid arrived together.

“Dad, come on!”

After attempting to pull his Dad off of him, he was met with an elbow to the stomach, sending him backward. Ava ran over to him, pulling him away from the fight. She helped him to his feet, silencing asking if he was okay. When the boy nodded, Ava noticed how Enid seemed to deflate with relief. Maybe the girl didn’t spend the day alone.

“Damn it, Rick!” Deanna glared. “Stop it right now!

Although it seemed that Deanna took control of the situation, Rick took it right back. With a flourish, he got on his knees and whipped a gun out, aiming it at Deanna’s family and Tobin. They all froze, Spencer shifting his eyes to Ava, as if waiting for her to do something. Even if Ava had power over Rick, she found herself glued to the pavement, entranced by his sudden outburst.

“You gonna kick me out?” He scanned the group before putting his gun down. “You still don’t get it. None of you do! We know what needs to be done, and we do it. We’re the ones who live. You just sit and plan and hesitate. You pretend like you know when you don’t! You want this place to stay standing? Your way of doing things is done.”

Despite Rick’s ramblings making him sound like a madman, and the blood trailing down his face wasn’t doing him any favors either, Ava had to stop herself from smiling. He was right, and saying everything she and Enid had been thinking for weeks. Ava may have allowed herself to get comfortable in Alexandria, but she never forgot who she was. These people needed to become who they would’ve been if they were out there.

“Starting right now, we have to live in the real world.” Rick growled. “We have to control who lives here.”

Deanna’s jaw clenched. “That’s never been clearer to me than it is right now.”

“Me? Me? You…” Rick trailed off into laughter before collecting himself. “You mean _me?_ Your way is going to destroy this place. It’s gonna get people killed, it’s already gotten people killed. If you don’t fight, you die. I’m not gonna stand by--.”

Ava was so drawn to Rick that she didn’t even notice Michonne’s presence until she knocked the man out. Silence erupted among the group, and Ava looked over at Enid, the younger sister already looking over at her. It wasn’t until she noticed Enid’s own small smirk when Ava realized she was wearing one herself.

* * *

 

After the altercation, Deanna ordered everyone to return to their houses for the night—everyone except for Rick, who was being held in an empty house and Pete who got separated from Jessie. Even after he got knocked out, Rick’s words still hung heavily in the air. Ava was glad he did it; the residents needed to know that this way of living would get them killed. They needed to adapt. She hoped his punishment wouldn’t be severe—Deanna couldn’t exile him for telling the truth. Ava saw Maggie follow the leader to her home after the fight, which she took as good news. Maybe the girl could convince her to let Rick off the hook.

 “At least someone finally said it.” Enid mumbled as they entered their home.

Ava caught the accusing tone in her voice. She wanted Ava to be the one to breakthrough to the residents—especially with all the talks they had behind the scenes. Maybe she was right; maybe Ava shouldn’t have spent all this time building up a front. If she had spoken her mind since the beginning, maybe Rick wouldn’t be locked up.

“Nothing like blood running down your face to get the message across.” Ava tried to joke, making Enid scoff. “Were you hanging out with Carl?”

It was the question that was bothering Ava since they dispersed. She noticed how Enid nodded at Carl, a silent goodbye before following Ava. Enid crossed her arms, a nonchalant expression on her face. It was this change of posture that confirmed to Ava something was going on.

“He’s been following me for two weeks now.” She shrugged. “I thought it was about time to let him know he wasn't as good as he thought." 

Ava couldn’t stop the small grin on her face. “Oh, that’s the only reason?”

In teenager fashion, Enid gave an over expressive eye roll, making Ava giggle. It felt nice to laugh with her sister over mundane things—things that once seemed like the end of the world before it was the end.

“I’m going to go to bed now.” Enid pointed to the stairs.

She raised a brow. “How convenient.”

“Shut up.”

Ava wished her sister a good night, the older girl smiling when she saw Enid’s own cheeks light up with a blush.

* * *

 

Ava didn’t remember falling asleep on the couch, but that was where she was when  a loud knock rattled the room. She jolted up, noticing how she was still in her clothes from the night before as the morning light crept into the room. Ava did her best to fix her hair, and to wipe the drool from her mouth, as she walked to the door. When she opened it, she expected to see Deanna’s harsh expression or Spencer. Maybe even Glenn. Instead, Carol greeted her.

Olivia had introduced the pair when they were in the Pantry one day. She was kind, maybe a little too kind for Ava’s liking. There was more to her beneath the surface, and Ava wondered if Carol would ever let it show. For now, she just wanted to know why she was standing on her porch at such an early hour.

“Good morning?” Ava greeted, though it turned more into a question.

Carol nodded, a small smile on her features. “We need to talk.”

Ava blinked. She had barely said anything to Carol, not enough to warrant a conversation.

“You and me?”

“All of us.” She gestured to the porch stairs, looking back to see Ava’s gaze on the upstairs. “It’ll be quick. You’ll be back before she gets up.”

Deciding to take her word for it, Ava stepped out onto the porch and closed the door—making sure she had the key before locking it. She hoped Enid planned to sleep late. The last thing she needed was thinking that Ava got exiled while she was asleep. Ava swallowed the worry and followed Carol down the street. She had a feeling that ‘all of us’ included Rick. If he had a game plan, Ava wanted to be on his side.

“I’m guessing you drew the short straw to pick me up.” Ava kept her eyes up ahead.

The corner of Carol’s lip quirked up. “We thought it would look suspicious if Glenn got you. After the Aiden fiasco, they’re watching you two.”

Ava nodded. It made sense. Since it seemed that Carol was putting on a front for the Alexandrians, she would be the one who knew what was truly happening in the Community. She kept quiet and kept her ears open; smart.

When they reached the home, Carol opened the door first. She let Ava in before looking around, only entering when she deemed that they weren’t followed. Turning the corner, Ava was shocked to see Rick sitting up on a mattress, awake. Besides his bandaged face, and wrapped hand, he looked no worse for wear. Looking at him now, it was odd to think that this was the same guy who was yelling in the middle of the street. Michonne sat across from him, her eyes going to Carol and Ava. She didn’t speak. Ava stood in between Glenn and Carol, the boy glancing at her before looking down at Rick.

“Deanna’s planning on having a meeting tonight.” Glenn spoke once he saw the new attendees. “For anyone who wants to go.”

This was the first Ava heard of it, and she realized Glenn had the inside scoop from Maggie. It was an advantage; they had time to prepare. For what, Ava still wasn’t sure.

“To give him the boot?” Ava asked, remembering Deann’s strict rule.

Carol sighed. “To try.”

“We don’t know that.” Glenn interjected. “Maggie’s with Deanna right now. She’s going to find out what it is.”

Ava locked eyes with Rick, the two sharing a knowing look. They already knew what Deanna was planning. She wanted a trial.

“At the meeting, you say you were worried about someone being abused.” Carol spoke, laying out a plan. “You say you took a gun just to be sure that Jessie was safe from a man who wound up attacking you. Just tell them a story they want to hear. It’s what I’ve been doing since I got here.”

At the last sentence, Carol looked over at Ava, as if confessing the truth to her. Michonne crossed her arms, looking up at the older woman.

“Why?” She asked, her tone sharp.

Carol shrugged. “Because these people are children and children like stories.”

“She has a point.” Ava found her voice, looking at Michonne. “They won’t listen to reason, or see reality. The only way to get through is with a lie.”

Michonne leaned back in her chair, and Ava wasn’t sure if she was contemplating her words or completely ignoring them. Most likely the latter. Ava turned to Carol.

“If that doesn’t work, do you have a backup plan?”

Glenn turned to the two women. “They’re guarding the armory now.”

“We still have knives.”  Carol pointed out. “That’s all we’ll need against them.”

Ava felt her heart speed up. The residents may be foolish, but they didn’t deserve to be stabbed to death. Ava never thought about taking the town, she only pictured leaving. It seemed that Rick’s group had another way of doing things if they didn’t like what Alexandria had to offer.

“Well, tonight at the meeting, if it looks like it’s going bad, I whistle.” Rick looked among the group. “Carol grabs Deanna, I take Spencer, Michonne gets Reg, and Glenn and Ava can cover us, watch the crowd.”

Ava put her hands in her pockets, thinking about the plan. What if the residents caught on and took hostages of their own? Ava’s heart thumped at the thought of someone grabbing Enid. Michonne narrowed her eyes at Rick, the plan not sitting well with her either.

“We can talk to them.”

“We will.”  Rick promised. “But if we can’t get through, we take the three of them and say we’ll slit their throats. They give us the armory, and it’s over.”

Glenn’s jaw clenched. “Did you want this?”

“No. I hit my limit. I screwed up.” He held his hands out. “And here we are. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m just going to sleep some more.”

As Rick adjusted himself on the mattress, the group began to file out of the room. Ava kept her eyes on him, watching as Michonne passed her. She didn’t know what he had been through before getting to Alexandria, but whatever it was, Ava could see that it changed him. She may not have known Rick before, but she knew enough to know this wasn’t how he always was.

As she made her way to the door, ready to join the others outside, Rick’s voice made her pause.

“Did you know?” He asked, his tone low.

It didn’t take Ava long to know what he was talking about. Rick wanted to know if Ava knew about Jessie and Pete; the domestic violence that made up their relationship. Ava sighed. She wished she did know. She had her suspicions after Deanna’s party, and how she hadn’t seen much of Jessie for a few weeks, but she didn’t put it together. It was awful that it went over her head, that she chose not to ask Jessie directly. But she couldn’t dwell on the past. It was done, and all she could do was be better.

“I thought he was just another old creep. Gross, but harmless.” She answered honestly. “I should’ve been more…aware.”

“Yeah.” The word came out as a low rumble as he sat back up again. “Deanna knew and didn’t do anything. They can’t afford to lose a surgeon.”

The answer made Ava sick to her stomach. They had Denise, she could learn how to perform deeper surgeries, especially with what she’s watched Pete do and the textbooks that littered the office. She hoped Deanna felt ashamed. Ava hoped they all did.

“What happened last night was good. They needed to hear it.” Ava admitted, Rick looking up at her. “I just wish you killed him.”

Rick seemed to settle on the wall, taking in Ava’s expression. She meant it, Rick could see it in her eyes. He was right to trust her. Even if he did get exiled, he had a feeling that Ava would finish what he started when it came to the abuser.

 She was planning on it.


	13. Council

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava waits for Rick's fate to be decided.

After leaving Rick to rest, Ava did her best not to linger in the streets. The air was still thick with fear as the residents began to leave their houses; poking their heads out of the door first, as if to make sure the madman was still locked up. To assure that their community was still the haven they believed it to be. Ava just wanted to go home and shower, maybe even catch a few more winks of sleep herself. Whatever direction the meeting took tonight, Ava needed to be on her A-game. She needed to be ready to defend Rick with her words or, if that failed, her strength.

As she turned down her street, Ava paused. Her gaze lingered on the street, the spot where Rick allowed his limit to be broken. The glass was cleaned up, and when she looked towards the Anderson home, Ava was surprised to see Jessie lingering in the broken window. Ava swallowed, knowing that she needed to talk to her. Jessie was one of the first people she met in Alexandria, one of the kindest, and Ava let her down. 

Ava’s footsteps up the porch made Jessie look up. The blonde gave a tight lip smile, but Ava didn’t notice. Instead, her gaze settled on the blackness underneath her left eye. Her blood boiled, and Jessie could see the rage within her gaze.

“He did it right when it was happening.” She assured. “It wasn’t in response to this.”

Although that did little to calm Ava down, she did remember seeing her laying on the pavement when she and Glenn came running. Ava wrapped her jacket tighter around her form, as if it would tell her what to say next.

“How long has this been going on?”

The question came out of Ava’s mouth slowly, testing the waters. She wanted answers. Jessie sighed.

“I help him before. I got him to stop.” She defended before fading. “This time, it didn’t get better.”

Ava wanted to say how it never got better before. How Pete just put on an act so that he could keep his life the way he wanted it to be; Ava would know, she has seen this before. However, she knew better. Jessie didn’t want to hear what Ava was sure she had already been told. Instead, Ava said what she should’ve vocalized a long time ago.

“Whatever happens, I got your back.” She nodded at the mother of two. “If you ever need a place to stay, or somewhere for Ron and Sam…if you ever need to talk--.”

Jessie put her hand up, stopping Ava’s rambling. The younger girl froze, afraid that she may have overstepped her boundaries. She gave an internal sigh of relief when Jessie gave a small smile of her own. Ava interrupted herself with a sigh.

“I wish I said this sooner.”

“You had no idea.” Jessie shook her head. “I thought about telling you, but I was embarrassed. You’re so strong, and I’m just…not.”

She gave a small laugh, one that was full of regret. If Jessie had told Ava, the woman would have wasted no time going to Pete and killing him herself. She had no patience for abusive assholes. Ava looked at Jessie, and she couldn’t see what she meant. Ava didn’t see a weak woman, she saw a mother with a heart of a lion.

“You’re stronger than anyone else here.” Ava reassured. “Don’t forget that.”

The genuine tone that Ava spoke with made Jessie’s heart swell. She wasn’t just saying that to make her feel better, Ava truly believed in Jessie. She saw potential in her fearlessness. Jessie gave a crooked smile.

“I’ll see you tonight.”

Ava nodded. “Take it easy." 

With that, Ava went back on the path to her home, unaware of the pair of eyes watching her from a once vacant house.

* * *

 

When Ava got back to the house, Enid was sitting at the kitchen table, munching on a bowl of cereal. It would’ve been a common sight if not for Carl sitting across from her, his own bowl in front of him. The two looked up at her as she entered, their conversation halting as Ava closed the door. She raised a brow at the sudden silence, slightly amused that they were talking about something they wouldn't want her to hear.

"Am I interrupting something?" She half-joked.

 “I invited Carl over while Carol watched Judith.” Enid answered. “Is that okay?”

On any other day, Enid wouldn’t ask Ava such a ridiculous question. However, with everyone holding Rick and his group under a microscope after the outburst, it was clear Enid wanted to know if this would hurt their own cause. Ava figured her reputation with Deanna died the moment Aiden did; and when she noticed her getting closer to the new group. She didn't care. They could think whatever they wanted.

“Of course.” Ava grinned, nodding at Carl as she walked into the kitchen. “How are you today, Carl?”

“I’m okay. It’s going to be fine.” Carl answered the heavy question. “Did you see my dad?”

Enid turned in her chair, waiting for Ava’s response as well. When she woke up to an empty house, she stupidly guessed that the older girl went on a run. It was only when Carl came over and put the idea in her head that her curiosity grew. Ava hesitated to grab her own bowl.  She knew better than to lie at the two teens sitting in front of her. They were smarter than most of the adults here.

“Yes, I did.” Ava answered, bringing her bowl over to the table. “He’s resting before the meeting tonight.”

Ava decided to leave the details of the visit out of the conversation. She already planned to tell Enid to stay home, and she had a feeling Rick would tell Carl the same. Silence took over the room as Ava took the box of cereal, pouring some into her bowl before taking a chomp. The bite made Enid feign a gag.

“What?” Ava asked, although she knew the answer.

Enid shook her head. “It’s shameful.”

“Oh, grow up.”

Carl blinked, confused. “What’s shameful?”

“No milk.” Enid pointed at the dry flakes.

Carl’s mouth lifted into a smile, and Ava couldn’t hide her own when he began to laugh. After what he just saw his dad go through, it felt good to watch joy leave his body. As she defended her choice, Ava realized Enid was playing along as she spoke about how disgusting it truly was. When she saw that her little sister was sneaking glancing at Carl’s gleeful demeanor, Ava understood Enid’s call out.

Ava was glad that Carl chose to hang out with them for the day. It gave her the chance to get to know the kid Enid seemed to be so taken with—in a platonic sense, obviously. He left late afternoon, wanting to be home when Rick arrived, leaving Ava and Enid alone once more.

“Be honest.” Enid spoke once Carl left. “Are they kicking him out tonight?”

Ava sighed. “Seems like it. Deanna wants a trial, but it has to be for show.”

“What’s the plan?”

Enid looked at her with crossed arms, waiting to hear what she had to do to make sure Carl still had his dad. Ava bit her cheek, knowing this would be the hardest part of her day.

“You don’t have to worry about that.” Ava pointed. “You’re staying here tonight.”

She was already fuming. “Are you saying you don’t need me?”

“Of course not!” Ava was quick to dismiss her claim. “I’m saying I _need_ you here. Do you still have mom’s knife?”

The question made Enid soften, and Ava could tell she felt guilty for jumping to conclusions. She didn’t blame her—their communication has been off ever since they arrived here. Hopefully after tonight they would have a chance to collect themselves. Enid’s expression melted into worry.

“Is that the plan?”

Ava pursed her lips. “It’s the backup.”

A backup she hoped would remain in the shadows.

* * *

 

Enid didn’t put up a fight when Ava left for the meeting. At the first sign of trouble, Ava told Enid to be ready to defend herself—she could tell her sister was worried, but knew that wouldn’t stop her from doing what had to be done. Enid was better at keeping her head in the game than Ava. The sun was setting as Ava made her way to the center of Alexandria, the large group of people and chairs arranged in a semicircle pointing her in the right direction.

Deanna stood in the front of the group, Reg and Spencer sitting behind her. Ava couldn’t help but look at Spencer, surprised to see the man’s gaze already on her. She couldn’t read his expression, his face blank. Ava wondered if he would ever stop hating her. She looked down as she sat between Carol and Eugene, the woman leaning into ear. She wore a smile on her face, putting up a front before whispering.

“Have you seen Glenn?”

“Not since this morning.” Ava shook her head.

Carol sighed. “Us either.”

Ava swallowed the profanity that threatened to leave her throat. With Glenn gone, they were down one person for their plan—one person to defend Rick. She hoped he was okay, but judging from the worry on Maggie’s face, Ava already feared the worst.

“We’re going to get started.”

Deanna’s voice rose over the crowd, silencing the group. Ava raised a brow before looking around the circle; not only was Glenn missing, but the man in question was nowhere to be seen. Why would Rick miss his own hearing?

“Can we wait?” Maggie voiced Ava’s thoughts. “There’s still people coming.”

“It’s already dark.” Deanna shut her down before beginning her introduction. “We’re going to talk about what happened. We’re going to talk about one of our constables: Rick Grimes. We’re going to talk about how he had a pistol he stole from the armory, about how he pointed it at people, and we’re going to talk about what he said. I was hoping he’d be here.”

Michonne’s voice reached the front. “She said he’s coming.”

It was then Deanna opened the floor for testimonies, Michonne giving the first. Ava listened intently as she spoke about Rick’s experiences—specifically, how everyone in here would turn into them, but only if they were lucky. Ava didn’t know if any of these people could reach his level, but they could get close. Close enough for them to live.

She then had to stifle a smile when Carol gave her own words, her voice unnaturally high pitched as she kept up the persona Alexandria now identified her as. Ava respected her commitment, and wished she could match it. After Maggie spoke of Rick’s family life, and how she wanted the community to become a member of their family, Ava decided it was time for her to speak. They needed someone outside of Rick’s main group to defend him, to let the residents know he wasn’t the crazy man they seemed to think he was.

“I’ve only known Rick as long as you all have, but I know what it’s like out there.” Ava’s voice made everyone turn to her. “You people don’t know the half of it, but Rick knows all of it. Don’t be afraid of him, learn from him.”

After finishing her statement, Ava’s gaze fell on Deanna. In the light of the embers around the group, the woman seemed to soften slightly at her words, contemplating all the testimonies she just heard. Ava could feel Spencer’s eyes on her, but she didn’t need to look to know the disapproving expression he was emitting towards her. His life changed drastically the moment Rick entered the Community, and he hated the fact that Ava was defending a man she just met and now taking his side. Ava hoped he would understand one day.

“I would like to share something in the spirit of transparency.” Deanna stepped forward. “Father Gabriel came to see me the day before yesterday and he said our new arrivals can’t be trusted, that they would put themselves before this community. Not one day later, Rick demonstrated all of this.”

Ava leaned back in her chair. She hadn’t met Gabriel directly, the Priest seemed to hole himself up in the Church, but Carl had spoken of his cowardice this morning. Maybe he was right, but Ava didn’t see a problem with it. Anyone would put their family before anyone else. Either way, Deanna’s words were meaningless.

“Is he coming?” Ava asked, her tone unnecessarily sharp. “If not, you’re just saying what someone _may_ have said.”

Deanna crossed her arms. “I had hoped he would be here.”

“Did you tape him?” Jessie voiced, obviously not comfortable with this game of telephone.

“He’s not here.” Maggie remarked, anger bubbling beneath the tone.

The leader glared. “Neither is Rick.”

 It was then Maggie excused herself, not bothering to wait if Deanna approved. Ava watched her go, her form heading in the direction of the Church. She hoped she was going to get the truth, or at least give Gabriel a piece of her mind. A moment of silence passed before Tobin stood up, the quiet man shoving his hands in his pockets.

“I just want to keep my family safe.” He voiced, making the group nod. “I don’t even know what that means anymore, but if it means we got to get rid of--.”

His words trailed off as his eyes went to the space behind Deanna. Turning, Ava’s own gaze widened at the sight of a bloodied Rick entering the meeting. Over his shoulder, he carried a dead one, his breathing heavily as he threw it to the ground in front of everyone. Ava stood up, the group mirroring the movement as they waited for an explanation.

“There wasn’t a guard on the gate.” His voice was eerily calm. “It was open.”

“I asked Gabriel to close it.” Spencer was quick to defend himself.

Now it was Ava’s turn to send a disappointed look towards Spencer—and even Deanna. Once again, their ignorance of the outside world almost got everyone killed. Whoever was on watch at the gate should’ve been the one to close it. Hell, it almost let a herd in. The leader seemed just as upset, glaring at Spencer.

“Go.” She bit out.

Spencer didn’t need to be told twice as he ran off. Rick stepped forward, his eyes scanning the group in front of him.

“I didn’t bring it in. It got inside on its own.” He then turned to Deanna and Reg. “They always will. The dead and the living, because _we’re_ in here. And the ones out there? They’ll hunt us, find us. They’ll try to use us, kill us. But we’ll kill them. We’ll survive, I’ll show you how.”

Ava found herself blinking back tears. All this time, she thought about how she and Enid would survive if something went wrong in here. How they would get out. Instead, she should’ve been thinking about how to help the community thrive. It wasn’t everyone for themselves anymore, they were a community. One day, they could even be a family.

“I was thinking how many people do I have to kill to save your lives?” Rick continued, “But I’m not going to do that. You’re going to change. I’m not sorry for what I said last night, I’m sorry for not saying it sooner. You’re not ready, but you have to be. Luck runs out.”

It was still a shock to Ava that Alexandria lasted this long. Now, with Rick’s group and herself being will to train those who need it, the community could have a future. Perhaps not a peaceful one, but a future all the same. The sound of footsteps made Ava tear her gaze away from Rick, her heart racing when she saw Pete making his way to the group. Jessie began to shake, and Ava found herself standing in front of the woman in some form of protection. She had a knife, and she would use it if he got too close.

“You’re not one of us!” He screamed, his blazing eyes on Rick as he moved forward. “You’re not one of us!”

Reg ran forward, stopping the man from going any further. “You don’t want to do this, Pete.”

“Get the hell away from me, Reg.”

As the two argued, Ava caught the glint of a knife in his hands. At the sight of the weapon, Ava pulled her own out of the back of her pants. Ava was ready to charge forward, to end it all, but a hand on her wrist made her pause. Looking to her right, Carol gave her a look of warning.

“Not now.” She whispered.

Ava’s jaw clenched, wondering why Carol would want to wait for the situation to get worse. Nevertheless, she listened and slide her knife carefully in her holster. The altercation didn’t last much longer, and the crowd gasped when Pete moved his hand in a quick motion, slicing Reg’s throat. While Deanna wailed, holding her dying husband, all Ava could do was stare, horrified. Abraham was quick to spring into action, tackling Pete to the ground and keeping him there with his boot on his back.

“This was him!” Pete yelled over the mourning, “This is him!”

Ava looked over at Rick, the man not paying attention to Pete’s accusations as he just stared at Deanna. No remorse, no guilt, just looking. Studying. When Pete took his last breath, Ava internally sighed. Another good man gone, and all because of the hate of another. She wasn’t sad about it, but angry. Angry that the community didn’t kick Pete out when they had the chance.

“Rick.”

Deann’s voice was shaking, her lip quivering as she looked up at the man she had just tried to kick out. Rick didn’t move, only waiting for her next words. A command.

“Do it.”

Without hesitation, Rick turned to Pete, firing one bullet into his head. The residents gasped, but Ava remained unfazed. If anything, she felt relief. Jessie would never be subjected to violence again. The community could begin working towards what they needed to become.

“Rick?”

A stranger’s voice made Ava look away from the body. Aaron and Daryl stood before the group, a new member between them. Aaron looked utterly shocked, his gaze shifting to Ava as if asking what he had missed. Daryl, on the other hand, seemed just as unfazed as Ava. If anything, he looked to be waiting for Rick to say something, to give an order. Rick looked at the stranger in disbelief, the black man looking just as shocked to see him.

“Morgan.”

* * *

 

No one lingered in the streets after the meeting was dismissed. It was Rick who told everyone to go home; Deanna silent as she held the corpse of her husband in her arms. It was a tragic sight, and Ava understood that she needed time. Rick led Morgan and Daryl to his home, needing to catch up with his old friend while Abraham volunteered to begin Reg’s burial. Ava watched as Jessie rushed home, needing to be with her children after what she just experienced. Pete may have been an abusive asshole, but he was still a father; a father Ron and Sam seemed to connect to, according to Enid.  Ava needed to get back to her sister, to tell her what happened.

Despite the heavy night, Ava was eager to tell her about how life in Alexandria was about to get so much better for them. She was on her way when she spotted the girl in question elevated in the air, sitting on one of the platforms near the gate. Enid flicked a lighter on and off, her eyes trained on the flame. Ava frowned, knowing something was wrong. It was odd, considering she was in good spirits only a few hours ago, but Ava recalled the mood swings of being a teenager. She stepped forward, ready to be an ear to vent to, when she realized Enid wasn’t alone.

Carl sat next to her, his hand resting on top of hers. Ava could tell they weren’t speaking, but the silence spoke volumes. Ava felt herself smile, glad her little sister had found someone to be comfortable with that wasn't related to her by blood. Enid would be well cared for tonight.  

“Ava.”

Ava turned away from the sight to see Maggie standing behind her.

“Did you find him?”

Ava wanted to know what Gabriel’s deal was; why he would say such a thing about people who kept him alive. Maggie nodded.

“I think it’ll be okay, but that’s not why I’m here.” Her lips pulled into a small grin when she saw Ava’s confused expression. “Tara’s awake.”

Ava’s sigh of relief morphed into soft laughter, Maggie mimicking the noise. She reached her hand out, Ava taking it as the two ran towards Denise’s house. After a night of tension and drama, it felt nice knowing that someone who deserved to live did so. The door was already propped open when the women got there, and when they entered, Ava’s gaze didn’t immediately go to Tara. Instead, she felt her eyes widen when she saw Glenn and Nicholas getting checked. The two were bloody, the color looking too bright to be from the dead. 

“What happened?”

Maggie stormed into the room, making a beeline towards Glenn.

“We were out there. The walkers and—we’re all right.” Glenn explained before grinding his teeth in pain. “Got winged by a ricochet.”

Maggie went to work checking on the wound while Ava stood in the doorway. She glared at Nicholas, the boy doing all he could to avoid her gaze. He knew that Ava figured out the truth; she was out there with him and saw how he operated. Ava was sure if she was the one who went outside the walls with him today, her own shoulder would be decorated with a bullet hole. Ava watched as Rosita patched him up, almost wanting to say that she shouldn’t waste her time.

“Ava.” Glenn’s voice made her look away. He slightly raised his brows, signaling that he knew her thoughts. “It’s all right.”

Ava hesitated before nodding. He was right; Nicholas wasn’t worth it. He was a coward, and his fear would get one killed if they crossed paths with him. She looked away from him and focused on why she was here. Ava smiled as she walked up to Tara’s bed, the girl smiling back.

“Jeez, if you keep looking at me like that, I’m going to have to marry you.” Tara’s voice rasped.

“I already bought the dress.” Ava grinned before getting slightly serious. “You’re not allowed to get hurt ever again.”

“Yes mom.”

Despite the teasing tone, Ava could see the appreciation Tara held for her statement. They were in this together now—they all were. Tara held out her hand and Ava took it, holding it as it rested on the bed.

“Holy shit.”

Eugene’s voice filled the air as he walked into the room, rushing towards the bed. Ava grinned as Tara looked up at the man who saved her life.

“Thank God.” She breathed. “Nothing happened to your hair.”

Ava looked over at Eugene, waiting for a response, but nothing came. All he could do was look at her, a smile on his face. It was endearing to Ava, and a little freaky to Tara as she chuckled.

“Okay, Eugene’s freaking me out. Ava, can you get Noah? I need both of my bodyguards here.”

Ava’s grin faded. One of Tara’s best friends died, and she didn’t even know about. The thought made her heart sank as Tara looked at her confused before turning to Maggie, Glenn, and Rosita. She was looking for answers, but Ava was sure that the tight squeeze she gave her hand help her find them.

* * *

 

Ava spent an hour in the Infirmary before making her way home. Tomorrow was the start of a new chapter for Alexandria, and she wanted to be ready for it. She wanted to be ready to help in any way she could. For the first time since arriving, Ava was ready to become a member of this community.

She stopped a fair distance away from the watch point, her gaze sharp when she saw Enid and Carl still in the spot she saw them last. Ava fought the urge to call her sister home; Enid was wise behind her years, and she deserved to have a night out. Besides, Carl seemed harmless. If he wasn’t, Ava could take care of it.

As she got closer to her porch, she noticed a figure leaning against the railing. Her confused expression morphed into muted shock when she realized it was Spencer. Ava took a deep breath before climbing the steps of her porch, the sound of the creaking wood making the man turn to her. His eyes were glassy with unused tears, his jaw unclenching at the sight of her. He didn’t speak, and Ava didn’t need him to. She knew why he was here.

Deanna was a wreck, and Spencer felt more alone than ever. He was here for comfort, for something familiar. Ava’s been there, and it was her knowledge of this emotion that made her take his hand and lead him inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The person on the porch was probably not who you expected...this is the slowest of slow burns, be warned!  
> We did it, season five is now complete! Thank you for sticking with this story; like I said, I'm back in school and working so uploading may be a bit more infrequent.
> 
> See you on the new journey :D.


	14. A New Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava holds an excitement for the future of Alexandria while Enid finds herself going back to square one,

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a filler, but hey, it needs to happen. Hope you enjoy! :D

Despite waking up to the sound of Spencer getting dressed, Ava kept her eyes closed and head on the pillow. He remembered the routine of getting out before Enid woke up, and for that Ava was grateful. But not enough to kiss him goodbye. Ava had to remember that last night wasn’t for her, or even about them. Spencer needed companionship, to feel that he wasn’t alone after losing two of the most important people in his life. Ava’s name was the first he thought of.

She didn’t know how to feel about that; about being the person a man went to be whole when she couldn’t even get herself together. Ava tried not to think about it, especially when she felt his lips grazed her forehead. For once, she was ready to enjoy the ride.

* * *

 

Ava waited for the sun to rise before deciding to face the day. She had tried to fall back to sleep, but it was still hard for her to sleep alone. Although she was happy Enid felt comfortable enough to sleep in her own room, there was a small part of Ava that wished she would sneak into her bed late at night; for the memories and so that she may get some sleep.

After slipping on a red blue button-up and a pair of jeans, Ava made her way out to the hall. She peeked into Enid’s room, noticing her even breathing from beneath the covers. Ava smiled, the sight reminding her of the days she would wake her up for school. There were many times she had to convince herself to do it. The only good thing about the present was that Ava could let her sleep—at least for an hour more.

The events of the night before left Ava in somewhat of a good mood, and she decided to head to the Pantry to see if she could make a well-balanced breakfast, for once. Ava didn’t know if it was just her, but the streets of Alexandria felt different; as if they were new, open. The community held the air of a place ready for a new beginning, and Ava could only hope that those within it felt the same.

She expected to be alone in the morning light, but was surprised to see Daryl already out by his bike, tinkering away at the belt.  Ava had missed him, and Aaron, when they went out on their recruitment; especially when Daryl went away just after Ava felt they were forming a friendship. She may have grown closer to the people in Rick’s group due to the events of the past week, but Daryl wasn’t here for that. Despite their own budding closeness, Ava had a feeling he would still see her as an outside when it came to his group. She would have to work for his trust, and vice versa.

“You’re up early.” She voiced as she walked forward.

Daryl glanced up from his work, Ava shooting him a small smile in greeting. He nodded before looking back down at the chain of his bike, digging into his work.

“Didn’t sleep much.” He grumbled.

From his tired eyes and wrinkled clothing, Ava guessed that ‘not much’ truly meant ‘not at all’. She crossed her arms.

“Yeah, me neither.”

 “I figured when I saw Spencer leave your house at dawn.”

Ava felt her cheeks heat up, and when Daryl glanced up from his work with a small smirk, the color only got deeper. She forgot how much he could see behind those bangs of his. Internally collecting herself, she grinned. Two could play at this game.

“You jealous?”

Daryl scoffed, but didn’t look up as he cleaned off a wrench. If he was being honest with himself, he didn’t know how he felt when he saw Spencer descending the porch steps. He had only just met Ava, but the sight made his stomach turn. In the end, Daryl pinned it on the uselessness of Spencer’s entire family; it had everything to do with them, not Ava. At least, that’s what he told himself to stop thinking about it.

“Just observin’.” 

“My house?” Ava teased. “That’s not creepy at all.”

“Stop.”

Ava giggled at the feigned sharpness of the word, Daryl’s own small grin betraying his attempt to be serious. However, Ava did stop as she put her hands in her back pockets.

“I’m going to see if I can make omelets for breakfast.” She gestured down to the Pantry, people already filling into it. “You’re welcome to stop by.”

Although he didn’t go to the party, Aaron had told Ava that Daryl had dinner at his house instead. The act made him more agreeable to be part of his new team, and Ava wondered if her own invite would make him a bit more comfortable around her. Now that it seemed that Rick broke through to the community, Daryl would need to appear a bit less frightening to the people. Ava hoped this would be the first step.

She learned not to get her hopes up.

“I have a lot to catch up on.”

“Right, you were gone for so long.” Ava nodded, playing along. “I’ll bring you by leftovers later.”

“Okay.”

That seemed to be the end of the conversation as Daryl went back to work. Ava took a breath before making her way towards the Pantry. One step forward, two steps back. That was how Daryl Dixon seemed to operate.

* * *

 

Ava watched from her spot across the table as Enid devoured the omelet. The food was always one of her favorites, and after seeing how upset she looked on the platform, Ava wanted to cheer her up. A small part of her hoped the food would get her to open up about what was, is, bothering her. She may have confided in Carl, but Ava still wanted to know what was going on in her sister’s mind.

“You heard about what happened last night?” Ava asked, picking up her own fork.

Enid nodded, but didn't speak. Ava took the silence as permission for her to keep talking. 

“Where were you?”

Enid didn’t want to tell Ava how she has been feeling about this place, especially when it opened a big rift between them last time. While her older sister was at the meeting last night, Enid got lost in her thoughts. She thought about how, no matter how Rick’s sentencing went, Alexandria would never change. Even if they did, the Community was too big to protect everyone.  They would all be goners, Ava would be a goner, and Enid didn’t know if she could handle watching her die.

She went to the platform by the pond to think. It was selfish to leave Ava, but Enid couldn’t just sit and wait for the inevitable. Out there, Enid felt safer; she could die on her own terms. Behind the walls, Ava could have the life she always wanted; she would get over Enid’s disappearance, the younger knew she could. Carl told her to not decide last night, to sleep on it, but Enid’s mind seemed to already be made up.

“I went for a walk.” Enid lied. “Got bored in here.”

Ava raised a brow, knowing she was lying, but let it go. It was normal for a teenager to have secrets, but Enid seemed to have too many of them for her own good. Ava opened her mouth, wanting to say more, but was quickly cut off by Enid.

“I have to get to school.”

Her gaze followed Enid as she grabbed her bag. “Who are you, and what have you done with my sister?”

“Very funny.” Enid rolled her eyes. “I’ll see you later.”

“Have a good day!”

The door shut, leaving Ava alone. The older girl sighed into her hands, feeling more distant from Enid than she ever had before.

* * *

 

“Ava, hey!”

Ava slowed her run down to a jog at the sound of Rick’s voice. After the lack of a conversation with Enid, the woman needed to let off some steam. Since she wasn’t expected to go on a supply run with Glenn anytime soon, Ava figured a classic workout would help calm her nerves. However, it only escalated her anxiety. Luckily, she now had Rick as a distraction as she walked over to him. The stranger from the other night stood next to him, a large stick in his hand as he smiled at her.

“You good to take five?” Rick asked, the bandages on his face slightly pulling as he gave a small grin.

 She shrugged. “I’ll make an exception.”

“This is Morgan. I met him at the beginning of all of this.” Rick introduced. “Morgan, Ava. She and her sister Enid got here a few weeks before us.”

Ava smiled as she shook Morgan’s waiting hand. He seemed like a sweet man, so kind that it was odd to think of him standing next to Rick. She had to remember that neither of them were always like this; just like her, they adapted to what they saw was suited best to this world.

“Good to meet you.” Morgan nodded. “Any friend of Rick’s is a friend of mine.”

She grinned as she glanced at Rick, the man looking down as if embarrassed. Ava figured after everything they’ve been through in their short time, they crossed the line of friendship a long time ago.

“You too.” She smiled at Morgan. “When you say the beginning, do you mean….”

Rick nodded. “He was the first one I met on the street, after the dead started walking.”

“Damn.” Ava breathed. “You two must have some insane luck.”

Morgan grinned. “I’m sure you know luck has nothing to do with it, Ava.”

Ava tilted her head in a knowing gesture. It was pure skill to survive out there, the ability to adapt being the characteristic that saved both her and Enid’s lives. Ava was about to agree when the sight of motion made her look behind Morgan; the two men followed her gaze and Ava was soon following Rick towards the action.

At the cemetery, Gabriel and Tobin were hard at work digging two graves. While Ava agreed that Reg should be buried behind the walls he helped build, she didn’t like the idea of having Pete right next to him. A murderer didn’t deserve to be next to such a kind heart. Ava wasn’t the only one who thought so as Rick stepped forward, the two men halting in their actions as he glanced between them.

“We only need one.”  

 Tobin gestured to the body bags. “We have two men here.”

“We’re not going to bury killers inside these walls.” Rick shut him down.

Ava could feel the fear radiating off of Gabriel and Tobin as Rick stared them down. She looked over at Morgan, the man observing with baited breath. She was sure Rick filled him in on what he walked in on, and she wondered what side he was on.

“I understand, but it’s not your decision.” Tobin shot back.

“Tobin.”

Ava turned around to see Deanna approaching from behind, quickly moving out of the way to let the leader through. She looked better than last night; her eyes still puffy from weeping and a sleepless evening. Yet, she still carried herself like the congresswoman she used to be.

“Rick’s right.” She stopped next to Ava. “Take it away. Go west, just passed the bridge. Let the trees have him.”

With that, the woman walked away. A moment of silence passed before Gabriel started to throw dirt back in his hole, Tobin continuing to dig for Reg. Ava watched as Morgan and Rick lifted the body bag, the woman going ahead of them to open the trunk of one of the cars. She stepped back as they loaded him in, the two men giving one another a look. Even Ava could tell they were having a conversation in silence, and Morgan gave one last look of judgement before walking past her. 

“I'll see you around, Ava.”

Ava nodded, the once light introduction now replaced with a feeling of heaviness. Maybe Morgan had an issue with the dead; perhaps he lost someone recently. She decided not to pry and instead looked up at Rick, the man’s grip on the trunk making his knuckles go white. Ava pursed her lips. She didn’t want him going out there alone, not when he looked this rattled.

Ava cleared her throat, earning his attention. She offered a grin.

“I call shotgun.”

* * *

 

The car ride was silent, something they both needed. Rick needed to get away from the stares, and Ava needed a distraction from Enid's attitude change. The passing trees offered her peace, and reminded her why Enid always wanted to be beyond the wall. There was an eerie calm to the world, wondering what was waiting for her past the tree line filled her with adrenaline, not fear. Ava would consider it a sickness, but it wasn’t. This was just her.

“How many people have you killed?”

The question from Rick came out of nowhere, and Ava slowly turned to face him. She would’ve thought she was hearing things if he wasn’t glancing between her and the road. Was this a test, or was Morgan getting to him? Ava rested her arm on the window.

“Two.”

“Why?”

“They threatened Enid.” She ran a hand through her hair. “I was coated in their blood for weeks.”

It was week two when Ava threw up, thinking about how her tan shirt now carried the remains of men. Horrible men. The vomit wasn’t out of disgust from the situation, but the fear of herself. How she didn’t lose a wink of sleep after that moment. Rick seemed to understand, of all people she knew he would.

“Morgan thinks we should’ve locked Pete up.”

The look now made more sense to Ava. She would like to believe that law and order still worked in this world, but it didn’t. When you messed up, you had to face the consequences—even if it is a bullet to the brain.

Ava scoffed. “And make him angrier?” She shook her head. “You did the right thing.”

“So did you.” Rick nodded.

His words sounded like comfort, reassurances she didn’t need. “I never said I regretted it.”

“Me either.”

The car lurched to a stop a few moments later, the pair getting out. They left Pete in the trunk, deciding it would be ready if they dug the hole first then dumped him in. The last thing they needed was a dead body attracting the roamers. When Ava found a good spot, she started to dig. The sooner they got Pete in the ground, the sooner he could become a distant memory. 

Just as she was making headway, Rick grabbed her arm, pausing her movements. She looked up at him, ready to ask what his problem was when he put a finger to his lips. Ava listened, and that’s when she heard it. The growls of the dead were distant, but close enough to make her want to get her knife out.

“This way.” He whispered.

Ava followed him deeper into the woods, and soon they approached the other end of it. A quarry was hidden on the other side of the trees, but that wasn’t what made Ava’s eyes go wide. It was the herd within it; the biggest herd Ava had ever seen since being out of the suburbs. No wonder why Alexandria was still standing, the threat fell in here.

She was about to vocalize her thought when snarling from behind made the pair turn. It was then Ava saw a familiar figure dashing through the woods, and she let out a quiet curse before taking off in a run. She was quick as she tackled Ron to the ground, stopping him from running off the cliff and allowing the walkers who followed him to take his fate. Keeping Ron on the ground, Ava took her gun out and fired at the approaching dead. As she reloaded, Rick came in from the side, taking the last one out with a knife.

Once it was calm, Ava stood up before extending a hand to Ron. She pulled him to his feet and sent him a look of disapproval.

“You shouldn’t be out here.”

Ron looked down, avoiding her gaze. “I wanted to know where my dad was buried.”

Ava softened slightly at his words, but Rick simply glared. He didn’t have patience for this, and Ava was right there with him. She felt bad for Ron, but he needed to realize that his dad’s death may be the best thing to happen to his family.

“This is how.” Rick spoke as he looked at the herd, Ava following his gaze. “The walkers that didn’t make it to the walls wound up here.”

The sound of footsteps made the pair turn, and Ava resisted rolling her eyes when she saw Ron making his way back into the woods. She doubted he knew how to get back to the community, and she wasn't about to let him kill himself to prove a point. Ava called his name before walking after him. She grabbed his arm, the gesture making him turn to her.

“I’m fine!” He whined.

"I didn't ask." Ava glared. “This is the last time you’re coming out here.”

“Why should I listen to you?” He growled. “Just because I’m with Enid doesn’t mean you’re _shit_ to me.”

He pulled his arm out of her grip. For someone who loved Enid, Ron was treating her sibling the wrong way. Ava didn’t care; the last thing she craved was the approval of a teenager. But she did care about Jessie, and the mother couldn’t lose a son. Not now, not ever.

“Because I know what’s out here.” She harshly whispered. “You can’t protect yourself, maybe Enid can show you how, but right now, you have no idea what you’re doing.”

Rick stepped forward, wanting to get in between the two youths before Ava did swing a punch at him.

“If you come out here, you’re going to die. It won’t be quick and it won’t ever be over because you’ll be one of them.”

If Ava though his stare was harsh when he was looking at her, it looked as if Ron was trying to kill Rick with his glare right on the spot. She understood; Rick was the one who killed his dad, but he was also the man who could help him the most.

“You’re coming back with us.” Rick warned. “Don’t make it hard.”

Ron didn’t change his expression as he watched Rick and Ava go into the woods, following them back to where they left their shovels. Ava looked over at Rick, knowing that he truly just wanted to leave the body. She did too; Pete didn’t deserve any kind of burial. However, with Ron watching them, the two shared a glance before beginning to dig once more.

* * *

 

Rick called for a meeting shortly after they returned. He wanted to get the walker problem solved as soon as possible, but everyone would need to be on board for it. They needed a big group, especially with a herd like that. Deanna’s house was already packed when Ava arrived, and she found herself in the window seat next to Daryl.

“You have to move your feet, dude.”

Ava heard him grumble something about ‘manners’ before sitting correctly in the seat, giving Ava the room she needed. They quietly listened as Heath explained that he saw the quarry situation as well. He thought it was handled, and Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Thousands of walkers in a ditch with multiple ways to get out was the opposite of ‘handled’. She listened intently as Rick summarized his plan; a plan that included checkpoints and blaring noise. It required perfect timing, and willing fighters. Ava figured the former would be easier to come by.

“Now what I’m proposing, I know it sounds risky, but walkers are already slipping through the exits.” Rick explained. “It’s gonna happen. That’s why we have to do this soon.”

“Couldn’t we just build up the weak spots?” A man named Carter asked. “I worked on the wall with Reg. I could draw up plans.”

Ava had thought about that, but after seeing a few of the dead squeezing through the barriers, she quickly shut down the idea. She shook her head at Carter.

“The sound of the walkers are bringing more to them.” She voiced, making everyone look to her. “No amount of buildup can change that.”

Carter frowned as the rest of the Alexandrians seemed just as deflated. This was their chance to prove themselves, and Ava could see that they were failing. From her spot at the window, Deanna spoke up. Ava had forgotten she was even here; the woman that was once filled with pride for her community now mute.

“We’re going to do what Rick says.” She announced, her gaze still on the window. “He’s laid out a plan, and we’re going to follow it.”

Rick nodded before addressing the crowd. “I told you all, we’re gonna have Daryl leading them away.”

“Me, too.” Sasha said from the couch. “I’ll take a car, ride next to him. Can’t just be him.”

Ava leaned back in her seat, examining Sasha. She hadn’t spent much time with the woman. She was clearly going through something, and Ava kept her distance. Ava knew what it was like to go through pain, and Sasha wanted space. After Abraham announced that he would ride shotgun with her, Rick reminded the group that there would be two teams on either side of the forest, keeping the roamers on track.

“Who’s in?”

Ava thought about how this mission would help Alexandria thrive, how it would solidify a future for the residents. For Enid. She didn’t waste a minute responding.

“Me.”

Rick nodded at her. He knew he had Ava since the beginning; she saw what the herd was like, and knew what needed to be done. Although she kept her gaze on the room, Ava could feel Daryl’s own eyes on her. He wasn’t surprised that Ava agreed to help, but her speed to do so. Maybe she did it for the community, but Daryl had a feeling she missed being out there.  

“Me, too.” Michonne agreed.

Glenn nodded. “I’m in.”

Ava couldn’t hide the smile as the residents voiced their own participation in the mission. They weren’t a lost cause, but they would need a bit of training before going out there. They needed to get used to seeing the dead up close, seeing them trying to sink their teeth into living flesh.

“I’ll go.”

Nicholas’ voice made Ava look up at him, the man standing right near her seat. The last thing Ava needed on this plan was to babysit him; to make sure his fear didn’t get anyone else killed. After the run, Ava never wanted to go outside the walls with him again—his attempt to murder Glenn only escalated that feeling. The thought made her look over at Glenn, the man looking just as annoyed by Nicholas’ interjection.

“I need to help.” Nicholas explained.

Glenn glanced at Rick before settling his gaze on Ava. If she trusted him out there, then Glenn could do the same. Ava gave Nicholas a quizzical look, her eyes narrowed.

“Can you handle it?”

Nicholas turned to her, shrugging. “You need people.”

That wasn’t much of an answer for Ava. They needed people, not cowards. If Nicholas was going out there, Ava had to be with him. Unlike the rest of the residents, she could defend herself if he screwed up. She sighed before looking back at Rick, the leader looking just as downtrodden but collected himself quickly with a nod.

“We’ll make this work.” He announced. “We’ll keep this place safe. Keep our families safe. We will.”

His words were good enough for Ava. Keeping this place safe was all she wanted for Enid, maybe then she could get truly settled. Ava sat back as Rick dove deeper into his plan, the young woman hanging on every word.

* * *

 

Enid nearly jumped out of her seat when class was dismissed for the day. Like every session, she didn’t take any of the lesson in. She went to make Ava happy, but it was getting taxing. She didn’t know how much longer she could ‘try’ when her heart was calling her away; back to the outside. Keeping her head down, Enid avoided Carl and Ron as she walked out of the building.  She needed to go outside the walls, to be alone with her thoughts and think about her own plans. However, she realized that would have to wait when she saw Ava’s smiling face.

She had hoped her sister would be out doing errands. Ava’s excitement for the community seemed to elevate after then night’s events; as if it was the push she needed to make her feel at home. In Enid’s case, it made her realize that nothing would get better here. There was always a new danger in the horizon, and a place like Alexandria, and it’s people, couldn’t survive it.

“I didn’t think you’d be here.” Enid drawled as she got closer.

Ava scoffed. “Well, hello to you, too.”

Enid merely rolled her eyes before walking ahead of Ava. The older sister’s gaze followed her, her feet doing the same until she reached Enid’s side. Ava didn’t understand what her problem us; one day, Enid is getting along with Carl and _actually_ looking happy to be here, and now, she was back to giving Ava the cold shoulder. She thought about asking Carl if he knew what was up with her, but decided against it. Enid would never forgive her if she went behind her back like that.

“Rough day?” Ava asked, hoping to worm her way into Enid’s psyche.

The younger girl shrugged her shoulders. “I’m just tired from last night.”

“You were with Carl late.”

Enid crossed her arms. “Don’t make it weird.”

“Hey, you were the one that said it.”

Enid didn’t crack a smile, but Ava didn’t notice. Instead, she couldn’t help but look at Ron’s passing form, the boy staring at her just as intensely as he made his way home. Something about him made a chill run up her spine, especially after today. He didn’t even seem upset about his dad’s death, but more distressed that it was Rick who killed him. Ava could see when someone was unraveling, and she didn’t want Enid to be around when he broke.

“Do you still hang out with Ron?”

At the question, Enid glanced to her side to see Ron making his way down the street, his pace quick and head hung low. A week ago, she would have called him her boyfriend—in the most innocent sense of the word. However, after Carl came into her life, Enid found herself exhausted by the very idea of being in the same room with Ron. She made that clear when she sat as far away from him as she could in the classroom.

“Not really.” Enid answered. “Why?”

Ava pursed her lips. “Rick and I went outside the walls to bury Pete’s body. Ron followed us and was just…weird.”

“Losing a parent will do that to a kid.” Enid shrugged. “You know that.”

Ava ignored the reference to their own parents’ deaths. They were so focused on surviving that neither of them truly had time to grieve, but they weren’t as reckless as Ron seemed to be. Ava shook her head.

“It’s not the same.” Enid opened her mouth, ready to argue when Ava put a hand up. “Can you just do what I say?”

She wasn’t in the mood for an argument, especially when she knew that she was correct. An expression of hurt flashed over Enid’s face before going back to her cold stare.

“That’s how we ended up here, right?”

Ava was left speechless as she watched Enid walk away, unaware of the guilt forming in the pit of Enid’s stomach. It was then Enid knew what she had to do; to ease the pain of leaving the one person she loved, Enid would have to be cruel. Cruel enough to help Ava move past her disappearance.

Enid hoped it would be enough.  


	15. Improvise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Ava attempts to save Alexandria, Enid prepares to save herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to season 6! :D

The next few weeks were devoted to Rick’s plan. Ava followed his orders without question; she drove cars out to different areas, parking them in a fashion to create a blockade. She took over gate duty while the usual guards helped at the construction lot, putting together a temporary wall to block the walkers during the day; she, along with those who were more experienced outside the walls, took over the night duty of the construction. Ava wanted to make sure this plan ran smoothly, and if doing grunt work would solidify their success, she was willing to work her ass off.

During this time, Ava didn’t see much of Enid. The older sister disappeared before dawn and came back long after dark. She would always peek in on her sister, watching Enid sleep bringing a wave of peace over her. It reminded Ava why she did this; Enid deserved a future. If this plan worked, she would get one. In the limited time they had together, Enid was still distant. She didn’t speak much to Ava, but when she did, it was never friendly. Ava didn’t fight back; she was too tired and thought that letting Enid blow off steam would get her back to normal. Rick was the one who told her to do so, the man able to relate to dealing with teenage angst in the apocalypse—well, sort of.

“Teenage girls are a whole other breed compared to boys.” Rick had stated as Ava hammered a nail into the wall, his hands holding the beam steady. “I wish I had better advice for you.”

Ava continued hammering. “You're right, she needs space. She hasn’t had any in years.”

It was true. Before the outbreak, Enid was constantly hounded by their parents. At the end of the world, the whole family was crammed in a car together before Ava and Enid were stuck to the hip. Alexandria didn’t offer her much peace either; prying neighbors desperate to enter their world didn't leave much for breathing room. If Enid needed to be alone, to lock herself in her room or even go outside for a few hours, Ava wouldn’t stop her. She would let her ride it out.

Having a plan in mind for her personal problems made it easy to focus on the larger issue at hand. To keep the walkers on the path away from Alexandria, herself, Glenn, Heath, and Nicholas were assigned to clearing the Tractor store a few miles from the quarry. Although this was scheduled to happen a day before the actual event, Ava saw it as an opportunity to gauge Nicholas’ ability—and psyche. If she saw him as unfit to help the next day, Ava would make sure Rick kept him home. More than enough people volunteered, they could live without the risk Nicholas brought.

“He got Noah killed?”

Ava didn’t realize Tara was next to her until she heard her voice. She paused in her digging and followed her gaze; Glenn and Nicholas stood side by side, digging their own trenches. Ava shook her head at the sight. She didn’t know how Glenn could stand with him, acting as if he didn’t try to off him in the woods. It just proved that Glenn was a better person than she would ever be—especially since she had to use all of her self-control to stop herself from hitting Nicholas with the shovel in her hand.

“He did.” Ava leaned on her shovel. “Maggie told me he lured Glenn into the woods, tried to kill him.”

“What the hell?”

Tara turned to Ava, an expression of disbelief and horror taking over her features. She knew even before Maggie told her, her words only confirming his status as a pathetic coward. Ava merely nodded.

“He should be exiled.” Ava pursed her lips. “Let the dead deal with him.”

“I couldn’t accept it either.”

It was then Maggie walked forward, the young woman slipping her gardening gloves off. With her closeness to Deanna, Ava was surprised when Maggie didn’t tell the leader about Nicholas’ plan. She was disappointed, but Maggie seemed to be a woman with a plan of her own.

“But that’s who Glenn is.” She shrugged. “He saves people. Even people like that.”

Ava looked back over at Glenn, the man focusing on his work. Despite knowing them for weeks, the people in Rick’s circle still intrigued Ava. They were skilled, able to kill at a moment’s notice, and yet they still had their humanity. That was rare, and something she couldn’t help but be a bit envious of.

“He’s sweet.” Tara nodded. “But I want to punch his face.”

Maggie smiled as Tara went back to work. Ava stayed in her spot, her eyes now on Maggie. She was watching her husband, a soft smile on her face but worry swimming in her brown orbs. She was afraid that Nicholas would try again. The plan would be the perfect cover-up. Ava clenched her jaw before gently getting her attention.

“I’ll be with them.” Ava’s tone was gentle with an echo of firmness. “I’ll keep an eye on him. He won't try anything with me there."

Ava could see the weight disappear from Maggie’s shoulders. If Nicholas tried anything, Glenn wouldn’t be alone. Ava would fight for him, with him. And, unlike Glenn, she would kill Nicholas if he jumped into the deep end. She would make sure Glenn came home.

“Thank you.”

She nodded. “Glenn’s a good person. He won’t die by his hand.”

Maggie grinned as she put a gentle hand on Ava’s shoulder, the touch not making her flinch—for once. She kept her gaze locked on Ava, wanting her to hear what she said.

“Watch yourself. You’re a good person too.”

Ava didn’t respond as Maggie walked away, going back to her own station. Ava took a moment before resuming digging, silently wondering if she would ever see her the way Maggie seemed to depict her.

* * *

 

Enid debated on running up the stairs when she caught sight of Ava in the kitchen. When she woke up a few minutes ago, the house was silent except for the humming of the air conditioner. Foolishly, Enid didn’t listen intently, her hunger taking over her senses and making her jump to the conclusion that Ava had already left for the day. Yet, here she was, standing by the sink as she drank a mug of coffee.

She had been doing so well; it pained Enid that she didn’t see much of Ava. Her heart ached at every rude word she forced herself to mumble. But it had to be done. She needed Ava to hate her, to make her relived when she found her bedroom empty. It would soften the blow for both.

Not wanting to break her streak, Enid quietly made her way up the stairs, her back to the second floor. Crouching at the top, Enid waited until the sound of the door closing echoed through the house before going to the kitchen herself.

* * *

 

“This is where it all starts tomorrow.”

Ava squinted against the sunlight, doing her best to keep her eyes on Rick.  She stood in between Daryl and Glenn, listening as he yelled the plan over the snarls of the dead. For weeks they had been going through it by looking at maps, but today was going to be a strict dry run, to see all the gears in motion and to make sure they spun tomorrow. Ava wasn’t nervous—if anything, seeing Alexandria step up these last few weeks made her feel confident for the first time since entering through the gates. She could handle this, and looking at the group around her, Ava knew she wasn’t the only one.

“You see that?”

Sasha’s interruption made everyone tear their gaze away from Rick and into the quarry. The groaning of metal overpowered the cries of the dead as the ground beneath their feet shook. With wide eyes, Ava watched as one of the trucks fell off the cliff’s edge, its’ disappearance giving the roamers the exit they craved. An exit that would lead them right to Alexandria.

“It’s open!” Rick yelled. “We’re doing this now!”

Ava brandished her gun as people scrambled around her, all getting into their positions as Rick called out orders. She cursed to herself. This wasn’t supposed to happen now. Today was meant to be a rehearsal, and to give her group a chance to clear out the store. Ava’s heart sank at the thought. That store was filled with the dead. Their groans would kill the entire plan. She ran, catching Rick on the arm before he could leave.

“I’ll hit the tractor place.”

He nodded. “Good. Who else?!”

As Rick moved on, Glenn stepped forward. He was already panting from helping people get into their spots. However, a strange aura of calm surrounded him. Just like Ava, he seemed use to things going wrong. He nodded to her.

“I got your back.”

“I figured.” She couldn’t help but grin before looking at Heath. “We got to take all of them out, or they’ll distract the horde.”

Unlike Glenn or Ava, Heath seemed completely taken back by the events. He expected a dry run, a run without consequences except for being yelled at by Rick. He expected to have more time taking out the dead, not to be under the pressure of the clock as Daryl led them to their location. He didn’t get a chance to voice this when Nicholas came bounding up to them.

“I’m here, let me help!”

Ava didn’t waste a moment. “Go home.”

It was one thing to deal with Nicholas when a plan was set, but with the sudden urgency of the day, the last thing they needed was to play babysitter. She didn’t flinch when Nicholas got in her face, his eyes blazing with anger. Ava wasn’t afraid of him, she would never be.

“I’m here!”

It was Glenn who pushed him away from her, his voice low with warning. “Do everything we say!”

“I will.”

All they could do was take his word for it as they took off, Ava’s adrenaline keeping her legs moving as they abandoned the rumbles and groans that filled the quarry. As she passed behind Daryl, she was shocked to hear him yell over the ruckus.

“Stick to the plan!”

 Ava's lips quirked up in a small grin, sensing the meaning behind his words. She didn't look behind her as she yelled out a response.

"You be safe, too!"

* * *

 

With Alexandria’s population lowered, and the streets quiet, Enid didn’t mind spending her morning sitting in one of the meadows. She would be leaving soon, and she wanted to enjoy what little pleasures the community brought her before she disappeared. Serenity washed over her, and Enid wished she could feel this way all the time. However, she knew better. One good moment didn’t mean a good life; a fact the people of Alexandria didn’t seem to get.

Something Ava didn’t seem to understand.

Enid closed her eyes. Whatever happened to the community after she left, she knew Ava would survive. She had to remind herself that her older sister may be growing comfortable behind the walls, but she wasn’t frail like the others.

“Hey.”

Escaping her thoughts, Enid opened her eyes to see Ron sitting next to her. She wondered just how long he had been here; it unnerved her. Enid didn’t speak, only nodding in greeting.

“I need to talk to you.” Ron spoke, clearly not needing her to. “About that night. I don’t have anyone else.”

Enid resisted the urge to scoff. This boy didn’t know the meaning of being alone. He may have lost his father, but he still had his mother and brother—two people who loved him. Ava and Enid lost everything. Soon, they were going to lose each other.

“What?” Ron’s tone grew aggressive. “Did Ava tell you not to talk to me?”

She didn’t miss the way he spoke her sister’s name, as if it was a bad taste in his mouth he desperately needed to get out. Enid didn’t know the specifics of what happened between them, but she knew that Ava was most likely in the right. Enid narrowed her eyes, thinking of ways she could say ‘I don’t care,’ when Ron’s hard expression transformed to something softer. Regret.

“I’m sorry.” His voice broke. “It’s…it’s just been really hard and I can’t lose anyone else.”

Enid sighed, her face vacant of emotion as she watched Ron wipe his tears. She truly didn’t care about his plight, what happened that night saved him and his family. One day he would realize that, but Enid had a feeling it was already too late. He made up his mind—his father would always be the hero. Enid reached out to pat his back, hoping the gesture would make him leave. Instead, Ron pulled her into a hug, Enid letting out a small gasp as her chin rested on his shoulder.

She froze as Ron hugged her tight. Slowly, she wrapped her arms around him, hoping to offer enough comfort to help him move on—and away from her. Enid kept her eyes open, her gaze widening at the sight of Carl. He stood in the street, his hands resting on Judith’s stroller. From here, his expression was unreadable, and Enid didn’t try to decipher it. All she could focus on was how she was going to tell him goodbye.

Carl moved on, pushing the stroller down the street. It was then Ron let go, and Enid only then realized he had been talking the entire time. He sat, waiting for an answer.

“It’ll get better.” Enid hastily assured. “I gotta go.”

Before Ron could stop her, Enid stood up and took off towards her house. Closing the door behind her, Enid began to rapidly take in air, trying to calm herself down. Her morning went from peaceful to constricting in one minute. She thought about Ava, how upset she would be when she saw that Enid was gone. She thought about Carl. Enid shook her head. She needed to get out before she changed her mind.

Running upstairs, she pulled her packed bag out from under her bed. Enid slipped it on as she took the stairs two at a time. With her hand on the doorknob, she prepared to leave forever; to never look back.

That was when she heard the first scream.

* * *

 

The tractor place was bursting with the dead, their growls reaching Ava’s ears even before her group stopped in front of it. The roamers’ slammed their hands against the glass, the motion making the windows rumble; Ava noticed how the hits grew rapidly when they caught sight of the living. She pulled her knife out of its’ sheath, planting the blade within the head of a walker pinned beneath a car. One down, way too many to count to go.

“So, what’s the plan?” Heath asked as Ava reached them.

Ava’s eyes scanned the building before turning to Glenn, the man looking just as deep in thought as she felt. They thought they would have more time to discuss what needed to be done, but Daryl was expected with the herd any moment now.

“We take ‘em out.” Glenn spoke up. “A few at a time.”

Ava nodded. “There’s one door on the other side.”

The pair took off around the building, Nicholas and Heath dragging behind. While Nicholas seemed a bit more eager to please, Heath’s lack of interest slightly worried Ava. If he knew how to kill walkers, she figured it didn’t matter. When they reached the door, Glenn walked up to it, pulling at the handles. He then turned to Nicholas.

“You’re at the door.” Glenn instructed. “You let one or two out, then you close it. That’s how we control it.”

Nicholas nodded as he moved to his position, Ava’s glare firm. If he messed this up, she was sure it’ll be the last thing he does. Glenn then looked to Heath and Ava.

“Ava, get high.”

She grinned. “Thank god.”

Ava slide her bow off her back, her quiver resting on her shoulder holster as she prepared an arrow. While Glenn and Heath handled the kills up close, Ava would stand on the roof of a car to get any stragglers. It was the perfect plan, and not just because Ava missed using her favorite weapon. Glenn smiled before turning to Heath. However, before he could give his orders, Heath gestured to Nicholas.

“What happens if he can’t hold it?”

Ava blinked, the answer obvious in her mind. “Then we take them on.”

 _“Take them on?_ ” Heath repeated, his tone filled with disbelief.

Although Glenn seemed to agree with Ava’s approach, he needed to remember that the Alexandrians desired a proper plan. They thrived on the organization of it all.

“If we get into trouble, we go behind the building and into the woods to draw them away.”

Heath rolled his eyes, unconvinced of the choppy plan laid out before him. He didn’t care if Ava and Glenn were ‘out there’ for a long time, he was tired of being talked down to. Of getting his limits pushed past the realm of reality. Surprisingly, it was Nicholas who stood up for the pair.

“You’ve been out on runs since they got here.” He reassured. “They know what they’re doing. Me and Aiden, we didn’t.”

Ava couldn’t hide the impressed expression on her features. It was the first time she heard Nicholas admit that they were in the right. The first time he didn’t outright lie about his role in the accident a few weeks ago. She knew better than to give him a pat on the back, but a swell of relief filled her up when Heath pulled out his gun.

“This was supposed to be a dress rehearsal.”

Glenn shook his head. “I’m supposed to be delivering pizzas, man.”

“Daryl’s on his way right now.” Ava tapped her foot, impatient. “We have to do this now.”

Heath nodded, and Ava took that as a go ahead to get to her spot. She climbed onto the hood of the car before stepping on the roof, her arrow aimed at the door. She breathed, waiting for Glenn to finish the countdown. When Nicholas opened the door, Ava stopped herself from firing as the sight of a wall entered her vision. Lowering her bow, Ava said the one thing everyone was thinking.

“Shit.”  

* * *

 

Enid swallowed her panic as she attempted to let herself into the Grimes’ household. The screams were deafening, and coming from all corners of Alexandria. She hadn’t seen the attackers, but that didn’t mean they didn’t see her. It was happening, their luck had finally run out, and Enid took it as a sign to get the hell out. When she finally got the door open, she was greeted by the barrel of a gun aimed at her chest. Carl’s eyes grew wide, his hard stare fading into a relieved sigh.

“Hi?” Enid greeted, unfazed.

He rolled his eyes before pulling her into the house, closing and locking the door. “Why didn’t you just knock?”

“I have these.” She held up the ring of keys she had stolen from Olivia. “Didn’t want them to have them.”

Enid threw them into Carl’s chest, the boy just barely grabbing them. She had planned to leave them on the counter for Ava to find, but with these intruders murdering anyone who got in their path, Enid thought it would be better to leave them attended. She considered it her first, and last, good deed for the community. She followed Carl into his living room, taking a deep breath as she prepared to deliver a bombshell.

“And I wanted to say goodbye.”

The word came out of her mouth easily, and it was then she realized just how ready she was to leave. Her time here was done. However, Carl didn’t seem convinced.

“Watch the back door.” He ordered as he adjusted his weapon. “Tell me if you see them coming.”

Her eyes narrowed in confusion, wondering if Carl even heard what she said or if he simply chose to ignore it. Enid didn’t know which was worse, but both filled her with anger as she walked forward,

“I’m not staying.” She enunciated each word, her tone laced with frustration.

Carl quickly turned to face her. “You’re not going anywhere. Sit down. You’re helping me protect Judith.”

Enid pursed her lips. Despite not being friends for long, Carl knew Enid wouldn’t put Judith in danger. She may pretend not to care about anyone, but if someone’s life was in her hands, she wouldn’t be the reason they died. Ava instilled that lesson in her, and Enid wished she could get it out as she lowered herself to the ground. She clutched her knife in her hands, her back against Carl’s as her eyes remained focus on the kitchen door.

“Did you see them?” Carl broke the silence.

“They’re just people.” Enid shook her head. “This place is too big to protect. There’s too many blind spots.”

She felt Carl shuffle. “And you’re just going to leave Ava to deal with it?”

Enid closed her eyes. She knew what he was doing; Carl was attempting to make her guilt larger than her ambition. He liked Ava, the last thing he wanted was to see her torn apart about because of Enid abandoning her. Enid took a breath, as if trying to push her sister’s face out of her mind.

“She’s the one who wanted to stay here.” Enid explained. “She made her choice, and this is mine.”

“If you’re so sure about this, why are you running when she isn’t here?”

She gripped her knife tighter. “Shouldn’t you be keeping watch?”

Carl went silent, understanding that he crossed his boundaries. Enid didn’t need to answer him, he knew why. She couldn’t say goodbye to Ava. If she did, if she saw her sister’s face, Enid wouldn’t be able to leave—even though she knew this was the best idea. Ava was her weakness, and always will be.

However, as she sat with Carl in the silence of his house, Enid began to wonder if Ava wasn’t her only downfall.

* * *

 

It only took one bullet from Glenn’s gun to shatter the store window. Ava watched from the roof of a broken down Mustang as the dead forced their way out, meandering towards the living. While Glenn and Heath fired into the closest heads, Ava let her arrows plant themselves into the skulls of the slower roamers. She also made sure to take out a few that peeled away from the horde, keeping them from joining the approaching herd.

“They’re still coming!” Heath informed.

Ava reached for another arrow, but only got a handful of air. Quickly, she slipped her bow back on her back before taking out her gun, firing towards the approaching group, covering Glenn and Heath as they reloaded. Heath let out a small gasp as one of the dead pinned him against a tractor, the man fighting against it. Knowing that she couldn’t get a good shot, Ava jumped down from the car and unsheathed her knife. She was about to do the deed when Nicholas rushed in, pulling the walker off Heath and to the ground.

Ava and Glenn gawked as Nicholas stomped on its’ head, ending the roamer's second life for good. A week ago, she would have considered him the last person to step up and save the life of another. Ava knew better than to celebrate one good kill, but it was a start. The loan snarl of a walker caught their attention, the last of the dead making its’ way towards the group. Nicholas glanced at it before looking to Glenn, as if waiting for permission. Glenn nodded.

“Get it.”

Ava began collecting her arrows as Nicholas took the walker out. While Glenn kept an eye on him, Heath made his way over to Ava, handing her three of her arrows that he pulled from the heads of the dead. She nodded as she accepted them, placing them back in her quiver.

“You two really do know what you’re doing.”

Ava took a breath. “If we didn’t, we’d be dead.”

“I’m sorry for doubting you.” Heath apologized, the gesture slightly surprising Ava. “I always considered myself an expert, but I have a lot to learn from you.”

She didn’t blame Heath for doubting her. For a long time, he was considered one of the best scavengers in Alexandria—that clearly wasn’t the case anymore. However, the fact that he admitted it made Ava feel comfortable around him. He was the first male in the community to not be intimidated by the newbies, but wanting to study them. Know them. Ava offered a grin.

“You’re good out here.” She assured. “We can learn from each other.”

Heath smiled. “Sounds good.”

“You guys ready?”

Ava looked over to see Glenn and Nicholas approaching, the former holding onto his walkie-talkie. She figured Glenn had contacted Daryl and Rick, letting the two men know that the store was clear and ready to be passed. They finished the task, but the day was far from over. Ava nodded, sliding her quiver on her back.

“Let’s hit it.”

The run to the rendezvous in the woods was short, and Ava was relieved to see that Rick and his own team were already there. Rick nodded at the quartet, a silent thank you for their services before watching the tree line. Ava took the spot next to Michonne, watching the herd pass them without so much as a glance towards the trees. Michonne looked to Ava with a soft smile on her face that she reciprocated. The plan was rushed, but it was working. They would have a home to go back to tonight.

“We have to keep moving and fan out down that thing front to back.” Rick instructed the group. “Glenn, you take the back since you got the other walkie. If it gets sloppy, we fire our weapons and pull them back on track.”

Carter was already moving when he spoke. “I’ll take the front.”

Ava and Glenn led a group towards the back, their numbers remaining in the trees. Ava kept her gun out and ready, watching as the end of the herd remained on the path. After firing a few shots to get them back in line, Ava couldn’t but bring up something she had been thinking about for a while.

“So, ‘pizza boy’, huh?”

A sheepish smile appeared on Glenn’s face. “You have to pay those loans off somehow.”

Ava was about to respond when the sound of a car horn cut through the air, the blaring noise bouncing off the trees and into the herd. All joking disappeared from the pair’s face as Heath came running up to them.

“What the hell is that?!”

“It’s a horn or something.” Ava’s heart quickened its’ pace. “It’s pulling the back half off the road.”

The herd switched directions, making their way to the tree line—towards Alexandria, towards Enid. Ava didn’t waste any time running to Rick, Glenn following behind. Ava wasn’t about to let the community die because of a horn. Ava had been protecting Enid for years, she finally had a chance at giving her younger sister the life she deserved.

And Ava was ready to kill anyone who threatened to cut Enid’s time short.

 


	16. Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava tries to get home.

The adrenaline in Ava’s veins kept her legs moving as she charged through the woods. Despite the blaring horn, she could hear Rick attempting to reach Tobin on his radio, trying to get the man to light up a few flares to get the walkers back on track. Ava knew it was already too late. They were on course to Alexandria, and nothing could make them go back. Whatever was happening in the community was about to get so much worse, and all Ava could do was hope that Enid was safe. As awful as it sounded, Ava didn’t want her little sister to play the hero, to help the weak ones—she wanted her locked in the house and taking care of herself.

The snarling of a distant walker brought her out of her thoughts. Rick lowered his walkie, turning to Ava before continuing to run.

“Ava.”

“Got it.”

Pulling the string back on her bow, Ava fired an arrow into the roamer’s skull. She didn’t waste time going to collect the ammo, instead keeping her speed up as she continued down the path. Ava stopped in front of Rick and Glenn, the leader waiting for the rest of the group before speaking.

“All right, new plan.” He began. “I go back, get the RV, circle around the woods on Redding. I’ll get in front of them before they get there. I can lead them away again, you guys get home. They may need you there.” Rick then looked between the trio in front of him. “Glenn, Ava, Michonne.”

He tilted his head, and Ava took that as a sign to follow him. Ava looked back at the group, silently telling them to stay put as she matched Rick’s footsteps.

“If something’s in front of you, you kill it. No hiding, no waiting, you keep going.”

Ava shook her head. “I’m going with you. There’s no way you can do this on your own.”

Granted, Ava believed Rick was the only one who could do this on his own. However, back up was always needed. Her request was also out of selfishness; driving the RV, Rick would get home before any of them. Ava would be with Enid quicker. Rick’s gaze softened at her words, and Ava wondered if he saw right through her.

“You need to help us.” Michonne’s voice made Ava look to her, the woman’s expression hardened. “We can’t get these people back on our own.”

Ava sighed, knowing her argument was moot. Even with Glenn helping Michonne, that wasn’t enough to bring a large group of inexperienced outsiders home. They needed her, most likely more than Enid did. Rick took her silence as acceptance as he looked between the three.

“The thing is, they’re not all going to make it.”

Glenn’s tone was laced with warning. “Rick.”

“You try to save them, you _try_ , but if they can’t keep up, you keep going.” Rick glared. “You make sure you get back.”

He looked at each of them, and it was only Ava who nodded. She would try to get them all home, but fate can’t be avoided. Rick was simply asking them not to risk their lives for something inevitable. Before any of them could speak, the screams of another group member cut through the air. The four took off towards the noise, and Ava frowned when she saw an Alexandrian getting chomped on by the dead. Rick and Glenn pulled the walker off of him, Ava quickly driving her knife through its’ skull while Michonne put the Alexandrian male out of his misery.

Silence took over the woods, and that’s when Ava noticed it. Silence. The horn was no longer filling the air with chaos. The victory wasn’t celebrated as the group watched Rick pickpocket the dead man, taking his gun and ammo before looking up at them.

“Get back safe.”

* * *

 

Enid didn’t know how long they had been sitting on the hardwood floor, but no one had attempted to break in. She did see a few heads pass the door’s window; they were dirty, blood on their faces with a ‘W’ decorating their foreheads. Whoever they were, they were out there too long. Now, they wanted a home for themselves, and they were taking Alexandria. Enid swallowed. That could’ve been her if she didn’t have Ava to keep her grounded—and vice versa. That’s what Enid would miss the most about her sister; she hoped her love would stop her from being a true monster.

“Oh god,” Carl’s worried voice broke her thoughts. “Ron!”

Carl got to his feet, his speedy retreat nearly making Enid’s back collide to the floor before she got to her feet as well. Keeping her knife ready, Enid followed him to the door. She was ready to join him outside, but paused at the door frame. Carl held an attacker at gunpoint, Ron standing to the side as he fought to catch his breath. She wondered just how stupid Ron could be; the moment he heard the screams, he should have ran home. It was an awful thought, but Enid would be surprised if he survived the day.

“Come inside.” She heard Carl invite Ron. “We can keep you safe.”

Ron’s gaze shifted to Enid, the girl suddenly feeling cold underneath the weight of his glare. To Enid, he may be an idiot, but that didn’t make him any less dangerous. There was a reason Ava told her to keep her distance from him. However, Ron was worried about her; it was why he was out on the streets, trying to find her. He risked his life while she was with Carl the whole time. The son of the man who ended his father’s life. Ron looked between the pair and decided; the last thing he wanted was to be protected by them. He looked to Carl, eyes narrowed.

“No.”

A twinge of relief flowed through Ava as she watched Ron run away, not sparing either of them a glance. While his answer elated her, she could see Carl’s shoulders slump in disappointment. She pursed her lips; he acted like a badass, but his heart was too big. She looked back into the house, remembering who was upstairs.

“Carl, come on!”

The boy shook his head, as if reminding himself of the task on hand, before following Enid inside the house.

* * *

 

The journey home was proving to be a bumpy one. After crossing paths with a group of walkers, Sturgress ran off—but not before misfiring a bullet into Scott’s leg. David ended up bit; Ava hadn’t known the man for long, but he was kind to her and had a family back home—which made it all sting a bit more. Ava kept Annie’s arm around her shoulders, the woman suffering a twisted ankle.

Rick was right. They would’ve been doomed without them.

After deciding that they needed to stop to take care of Scott’s wound, they reached a small strip mall. Ava could tell it was a farmer’s town, the stores advertising a sale on feed as well as saddles. However, what truly caught her eye was the groups of walkers descending on the town. Since Nicholas was the last one to be here, their lives were in his hands as they followed him through the alleyways. Ava wasn’t confident as he stumbled his way into a pet store, but after it appeared to be clear, she gently lowered Annie to the ground.

“Thank you.” She gave a soft smile.

Ava nodded. “We look out for each other.”

“Can we talk?”

Ava looked over to see Glenn looming over the aisle, Michonne and Heath looking just as confused as she felt. Using her backpack to elevate her ankle, Ava left Annie to rest while she joined the group in the back of the store.

“If we can find a way to distract the herd from coming in, then they won’t make it back to the community.”

Heath blinked. “How?”

“Burn one of the buildings.” Glenn explained. “They’ll get drawn to it and they’ll stop here.”

Ava thought about the promise she made to Maggie; Glenn was going to make it back. However, this plan sounded like a death sentence. Michonne seemed to agree.

“I’ll go. You and Ava stay here with them.”

Glenn shook his head. “It’s my plan. It’s on me.”

“You have a wife, Glenn.” Ava reminded.

“And you have a sister.” Glenn turned to Ava. “That’s why we’re both out here, and it’s why I’m doing this. You’ve got to get everyone back.”

Ava closed her eyes. Enid was the reason why she was fighting so hard—even before everything went wrong, it was all for her. Glenn knew the feeling, because it was why he needed to do this. He had to secure Maggie’s future, even if it was one without him in it. When Ava nodded, Glenn went on.

“If I take too long, just go.”

Michonne shook her head. “We’re not leaving without you. That is not the way this works.”

“I will meet you there.” Glenn reassured. “We all have a job to do.”

Ava crossed her arms and sent a look to Michonne, the woman already looking back at her. Neither of them liked the idea of Glenn putting himself on the line, especially with Maggie waiting for him, but they knew he was capable. Ava had no doubt he could make it home.

“There’s a feed store.” Nicholas interjected. “It should go up easily. I’ll go with you.”

All of Ava’s confidence about the trip disappeared. The last time Nicholas and Glenn were alone, Nicholas nearly killed him. Ava glared at him, the gaze making Nicholas instantly cower.

“I’ll…draw a map.”

“No.” Glenn stop him. “You lead the way.”

Nicholas nodded, and Ava clenched her jaw before following Glenn into an aisle. She waited until he finished his update to Rick, giving him a moment of silence before stepping in. He didn’t turn around, but Ava saw him tense. He knew what was coming.

“You shouldn’t go out with him.” Ava’s voice low.

“We don’t exactly have the time to draw a map.”

Ava leaned against a shelf. “Is that the only reason?” When Glenn didn’t answer, Ava sighed. “I’m afraid you put your faith in the wrong people.”

He was the only one willing to give Nicholas a second chance. It was kind, and what made Glenn a good person, but Ava wished he could be selfish. Or, like her, see that the man was a lost cause. In Ava’s eyes, he was gone before they even went out with him. Glenn got to his feet, walking towards Ava in short strides.

“If he wants to try, I’m going to let him.” He explained. “And I put my faith in you, and it seems to be working out.”

A small smile graced Ava’s features. It was Glenn who put her in Rick’s good graces, and now here they were. Glenn put a hand on her shoulder, grinning.

“Tell Enid I said hi.”

Ava smiled. “Only if you do the same for Maggie.”

“Deal.”

* * *

 

The gunshots and screams faded, silence overtaking Alexandria once more. While Carl checked on Judith, Enid scurried out of the Grimes’ house. It was time for her to take her leave, and this was the only chance she had. Bodies littered the street, but Enid didn’t stare as she ascended the porch steps and entered her house—Ava’s house.

With her heavy backpack still on her shoulders, Enid quickly got a piece of paper out and scribbled a note. She wasn’t planning to leave a token behind, but with the scene Ava was bound to come home to, Enid needed her sister to know that she lived. That she left on her own, and not by the hands of a lunatic.

She placed the note on the counter before making her way to the door. Taking one last look around the crème house, and picturing Ava smiling at her, Enid disappeared.

* * *

 

“On my count.”

Four pairs of eyes stared at Ava as the woman raised her gun. The feed store was quickly being surrounded, the herd within the town growing. Glenn and Nicholas hadn’t returned, and neither Michonne nor Ava caught sight of smoke, but they couldn’t wait. If they remained in the store any longer, none of them would make it home. Heath and Michonne kept their hands on the doors, ready for Ava’s orders. The woman cocked her gun.

“Now!”

With that, Michonne and Heath pushed the entrance open. Ava and Annie instantly released fire as Michonne sliced the dead. Heath quickly went back to Scott’s side, holding onto the man before making his way out into the open. Ava picked up the front, covering the pair as she fired her weapon. Michonne ran at her side, taking care of any roamers who got too close.

“Where’s the feed store?” Michonne asked whoever knew.

“Forget it!” Heath yelled. “Glenn said we got to go, we got to go now!”

Ava’s heart sank. They were following Glenn’s wishes, and he could be alive, but she couldn’t ignore the bad feeling within the pit of her stomach. As if she was just waiting for bad news. The snapping of Annie’s crutch made them all freeze, turning to see the woman on the ground as the herd approached. Ava ran to help her, but stopped when she put a hand up.

“Just run!” She screamed, and Ava couldn’t move. “Go!”

Michonne grabbed Ava’s hand, the touch making Ava snap out of her daze. Michonne gave a reassuring nod before running down the sidewalk, Ava letting go of her hand to match her speed. They turned down an alley, the path leading to a metal gate. It was tall, but they could make it with a boost. Ava dragged a trashed coffee table to the fence, David helping her get it on its four legs. Michonne sheathed her machete before laying out the plan.

“Heath, go over first, and then we’ll help Scott.”

Scott shook his head. “No, they’re coming. Just go!”

“We’re not leaving anyone behind!” Ava yelled over the snarls of the dead. “Come on!”

They already lost too many people today, and Ava wasn’t about to let anyone else die. She kept her gun trained as Heath climbed the fence. She covered Michonne and David as they hoisted Scott onto the fence. Once he was over, Ava turned slightly to the pair behind her.

“Michonne, you’re next!”

She shook her head. “No, you go. I’ll cover!”

“I wasn’t asking!”

Ava shouted over her gunfire, taking out a few of the dead that came too close. She heard Michonne curse, but the woman climbed the fence all the same. Ava backed up, getting closer to the gate. After firing a few more bullets, Ava and David began their own climb. She put her hands on the top, ready to throw herself over when fingers wrapped around her ankles, the dead flesh pulling her downwards. Ava grunted as she tightened her grip on the fence, Michonne grabbing the top of her hands as Heath fired into the herd by her feet.

She never thought walkers would be the way she died. After seeing the damage people did in this world, she figured a psychotic would be the one who ended her time on Earth for good. Ava knew how to handle the dead, but she clearly underestimated them. David let out a scream as he was pulled to the ground. His body distracted the walkers, giving Ava the chance to reach the other side of the fence. Michonne helped her down, the pair joining Heath and Scott on the grass.

They watched in horror as David became a meal, Ava’s eyes widening at the sight He never had the chance to say goodbye to the love of his life. Ava knew he died with that pain, and she decided to put him out of his misery with a bullet to the forehead. His screams silenced, but the groans of the dead grew as they continued to feast.

“We gotta keep going.”

Heath’s voice brought Ava back to reality, and the small group of four disappeared into the woods. While Heath and Michonne assisted Scott, Ava took up the front. She kept her gun out, ready to cover them if needed. She felt her body shaking; the adrenaline was wearing off, and the pain of the day was catching up to her. The loss of her group, the pain of not knowing if Enid would be alive when she got home. Her mind wandered to Glenn, and she looked up at the sky. No smoke.

“It doesn’t mean they didn’t make it.”

She looked over to see Michonne looking upwards as well. Ava didn’t know if she was trying to reassure Ava or herself. Nevertheless, Ava nodded as Michonne looked down. The girl put a gentle hand on her arm.

“Let’s go home.”

* * *

 

The walls of Alexandria were crumbling, the metal off the hinges. The sight made Ava want to vomit, but all she could do was run forward into the community. Michonne didn’t call her back, the woman watching as she disappeared through the slightly open gate. Even if she wanted to, Michonne knew she couldn’t stop her. Ava only had one person on her mind, and it was the person who shared her blood.

Ava didn’t dare to look at the bodies that lined the streets, the pools of blood forming underneath them. She didn’t want them to confirm the worst. 

“Ava?”

Through the smoke, Ava could see Deanna approaching her, Spencer in tow. The leader of Alexandria looked at her with wide eyes, her expression laced with worry and shock as she took in the young woman. Ava figured she was covered in blood and guts, but she didn’t care as she ran over to the pair.

“Enid.” Her voice shook. “Have you seen her?”

Deanna grabbed her arms. “Not yet, but we’re searching everyone’s houses—Ava!”

Ava ignored her as she ran towards her home. Her heart stopped when she saw her door slightly ajar, Ava pulling out her knife as she entered the house. Enid was smart, she would’ve locked herself away. It was possible someone could have gotten in, but she was hiding in a closet. Her knife raised when she heard footsteps.

“Enid, it’s me.” 

The footsteps drew near, and Ava stopped herself from slashing her knife forward when Carl entered her vision. A rifle was strapped to his back, the sight making Ava feel relieved. Enid was most likely with him, she was safe.

“Are you okay?” Ava walked forward, inspecting his body.

Carl nodded. “None of them got in here.”

“Who were they?”

“It doesn’t matter.” Carl answered. “Not anymore.”

 Ava didn’t pry further. The soon they forgot about the attackers, the quicker they could move on. Ava slipped her knife back in its holster.

“Is Enid back at your place?”

A frown appeared on Carl’s features, the sudden expression making Ava’s heart quicken its’ pace. Her mind weaved horrible scenarios, but paused when Carl handed her a small note card. Turning it around, Enid’s unmistakable handwriting greeted Ava. The script wrote out a phrase that was spoken within their family, a phrase that only the sisters truly knew the weight it bared. Words that now made Ava’s heart sink to the depths of her stomach.

_Just Survive Somehow._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun dunnnnnn. :P  
> Hope you enjoyed the chapter! <3


	17. Uncertainty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava sets out to bring Enid home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> I had this done, and wanted to get it out before I lost power from Hurricane Irma. So far, my area is only expecting an outage and awful winds--which is much better than most of the state. Either way, this was a good distraction and I hope you enjoy it. :)

Ava could feel Carl’s eyes on her as she bounced from drawer to drawer, emptying its’ contents into her backpack before moving onto the next set. After receiving Enid’s farewell, Ava didn’t speak a word, merely brushing past Carl to go upstairs and prepare. She needed to go out there and bring Enid back, even if that meant she had to drag her little sister back kicking and screaming. Despite what Enid thought, Ava knew she belonged here. Alexandria was already her home, and that fact alone terrified the young one. Ava would have to explain to her that it was okay to settle. Their fight was over, and it was time to reap the rewards.

If Ava had to guess, Enid most likely left an hour ago. With that kind of gap in time, and due to Enid’s skill, she could be anywhere by now. The only factor holding her back would be the herd, and their location. The thought made Ava run a hand over her frustrated features before going back to packing. She reminded herself that there would be plenty of time to be upset later. For now, Ava had to remain focused. Pulling her gun out of its holster, she checked the limited ammo she had. At the sign of her annoyance over the lack of weaponry, and knowing she wouldn’t want to waste daylight going to the armory, Carl pulled his rifle off his back.

“Here.” He held it out to Ava. “I only fired it once, full round.”

“Thanks.” Ava put the strap on her shoulder. “And thank you. For being with her.”

“I told her to come inside and help me protect Judith.” Carl shook his head. “I looked away once and she ran.”

Ava could sense the tone of regret. Carl blamed himself for letting Enid run away; he had spent the entire day with her, and the one moment they were separated, she took the opportunity. He had nothing to be sorry for; Ava knew how Enid operated, every move was calculated. It was a good skill, but infuriating.

“Yeah, but she’s alive. That’s all that matters.” Ava assured. “Especially since I’m going to kill her.”

She gave a small grin as she left her bedroom, Carl in tow. Ava went to the kitchen, pulling out a few cans of food for the road; she already had her knife and bow packed, knowing she would be hunting. Ava didn’t know how long she was going to be out there, but she was prepared to spend weeks alone. The harsh afternoon sun hit her the moment she stepped out of the house, Ava blinking as she made her way to the front gate.

“I’ll tell my dad what happened.” Carl handed her his walkie talkie. “He’ll understand.”

Ava clipped the radio to her belt. Even if Rick didn’t understand, it wasn’t like he could stop her. No one could. As she neared the gate, Ava noticed Spencer and Morgan were on watch, the pair looking at her as she approached.

“Open it.”

Spencer blinked down at her. “No one’s leaving, Ava.”

“I am.” She corrected. “Open it.”

On the ground, Morgan stepped forward. He could tell something was wrong.

“Did you lose something?”

Ava glared. The last thing she needed was a philosophical pep talk from a man she was still getting to know. Ava didn’t have the time, or energy, to pretend like she cared about what he had to say. She heard footsteps approaching, and Ava didn’t need to turn around to know they belonged to Maggie and Michonne. They kept their distance, listening.

“Look, when I get back, you can give me all the deep advice you want.” Ava lied. “But, for now, I need you to open the gate.”

Morgan didn’t flinch, and Ava wanted to scream. Michonne was the one to answer, confused as to why Ava would want to leave Alexandria when she knew half of the massive herd was still coming their way.  

“We don’t know where the herd is, or what it’s like.” Her tone was even. “ _Everyone_ is staying put until we hear from Rick.”

Ava didn’t miss the emphasis on ‘everyone’, or the way Maggie shuffled her feet when she spoke it. She turned to face Michonne, the woman’s expression soft but holding a warning. Ava narrowed her eyes. Michonne would have to stab her with that katana to keep Ava from leaving. She whipped her head back to Morgan, ready to say the command one last time. However, when her mouth opened, it wasn’t her voice that came out.

“Open the gate now!”

Rick’s yell filled Alexandria, and Morgan didn’t waste time obeying. Michonne ran to help, the pair pulling the metal open. Ava went wide eye at the sight in front of her. Rick was running full speed towards the community, his arm gushing blood as a massive herd of the dead followed him. Without a second thought, Ava lifted the rifle up, keeping it trained on the dead and ready to give Rick cover if he needed it. The small group that gathered step backwards as he jumped through the gate, falling on the concrete with a thud. Quickly, Morgan and Michonne locked the entrance while Rick fought to catch the breath that left his lungs. The dead slammed against the chain link fence, piling on each other, desperate to reach the living inside. Ava blinked back tears, taking in the sight of the biggest obstacle between herself and Enid.

“Told you.” Spencer’s voice said from next to her. “No one’s leaving.”

Her sadness dried up, replaced with burning anger. Sending a glare to Spencer, Ava made her way back into the community. She would find a way out, and then, Ava would bring Enid home.

* * *

 

Leaving Alexandria was easy.

Carl’s focus was on Judith, the brother disappearing up the stairs to comfort his weeping sister. That gave Enid the opportunity she needed to leave the house without bidding farewell. With the residents reeling from the attack, no one noticed Enid jumping the steel wall, a bag full of food and water on her back and a knife on her hip. She didn’t have a gun, but Enid was sure she could find one from a roamer; it was how Ava found ammo for their dad’s pistol.

Ava. The very thought of her sister made Enid pause in her trek through the woods. She didn’t want to picture Ava finding the note, or imagine her reaction when she realized Enid wouldn’t be returning. Ava would recover, but not for a while. Enid was sure Ava would come looking for her, which was why she needed to get as much distance between her and the community as possible.

The thought served as a reminder for Enid to keep walking, putting her focus on avoiding the eyes of the dead that passed through the thicket of trees. She looked behind her, unable to see Alexandria but sensing its’ overbearing presence.

Leaving Alexandria was simple, abandoning Ava was the challenge.

* * *

Alexandria was surrounded.

Every wall that Ava walked up to, she could hear the pounding of rotting fists against the metal, feel the vibrations of their desperation. It wasn’t until she climbed a tree within the walls that gave her a vantage point from all sides when Ava realized just how screwed they were. The horde was massive, making themselves at home on every end of the wall. Ava could see more coming in the distance, attracted by the sound of their friends. She tightened her grip on the branch. There was no way she could get out of here—even if she did, Ava didn’t know how she and Enid would get back in.

Enid. Only she could make Ava upset and furious at the same time. She knew Enid was unhappy, but she never anticipated her to leave without a word. Ava was wrong to give her space—she should’ve had a sit down with Enid instead of giving her time to think of the idea to leave. Ava sighed as she descended the tree. She had to get out of here. She couldn’t just sit here and let Enid gain distance.

Ava tried to formulate a plan of escape as she walked to the armory, doing her best to avoid Rick. She didn’t need another person telling her to stay behind the walls; she made her choice, and her decision was to fetch Enid. However, it seemed that Ava would have to listen to the point when she walked through the doors to see Maggie and Aaron conversing in the armory.

The pair turned to Ava, the woman barely registering them as she walked to the wall of pistols. She took one for Enid, loading it up before doing the same for herself.

“You’re going out there.” Maggie’s voice was gentle, knowing. “For her.”

Ava tensed slightly before continuing to load. “And no one’s going to stop me.”

“Me either.”

Ava looked up from the gun and took in Maggie’s face. Glenn was still out there—alive or dead, and Maggie needed to know the answer. Ava wanted to apologize. She told Maggie that she would look out for Glenn, and she failed her. Ava seemed to be doing that a lot these days. However, the woman didn’t look like she was expecting an apology. 

“I’m going with you.” Maggie swung a backpack on her shoulders.

The statement surprised Ava. She never thought about going out there with someone. Finding Enid felt like a solo run to her, just like how finding Glenn was something Maggie needed to discover on her own. However, Ava knew better than to think Maggie would slow her down. The woman was capable, and was on a mission. If she kept her focus, Ava didn’t see an issue.

“We’ll find a way out together.” Ava nodded. “But if we need to split up, we’ll split up.”

Maggie agreed. “Of course.”

“I can’t let either of you do this.”

Ava almost forgot Aaron was present until she heard his voice. He stood in the corner of the armory, his arms crossed as he looked between the two women. Out of everyone in Alexandria, she hadn’t expected Aaron to be the one to keep her at bay. Ava stepped forward, narrowing her eyes.

“You can’t stop us.” Ava warned. “Not when they’re out there.”

The pair made their way to the door, nothing but the mission on their minds when Aaron put a gentle hand on Ava’s arm. The touch made the girl turn around, Maggie following suit. Aaron’s eyes softened as he considered Ava’s determined orbs; he could see the fire, but also sadness. She needed her sister back, and who was he to stop her? Aaron sighed.

“I’m going to help you.” He looked at Maggie. “Both of you.”

Ava and Maggie shared a look as Aaron reached for a gun, both hoping the man wouldn’t slow them down. Ava knew Aaron went beyond the wall multiple times, and for long periods, but she didn’t know if that would be enough.

“And I know a safe way out.”

That was enough to make Ava move out of the way, and let Aaron go first.  

* * *

Aaron led Ava and Maggie to a sewer grate, the location far beyond the houses of Alexandria. As he worked to open the grate, he explained how the tunnel would lead under the gate and, hopefully, passed the walkers. When he got to his feet, Maggie rested a hand on his arm.

“Thank you,” She nodded. “But we’re going to go on our own from here.”

Aaron looked to Ava, surprised to see the woman nodding. “If all three of us leave, Rick will notice. We need you to cover for us.”

“I can’t watch more names go up on that wall.” Aaron’s voice was soft, but heavy with regret.

Ava frowned. She heard about Aaron blaming himself over the attack—the wolves did find his backpack after all. But he couldn’t live with that guilt on him forever.

“You won’t.” Ava promised. “None of this is your fault. You don’t need to do this.”

Aaron swallowed, hating the way he was just called out. However, he knew he could help more by staying in the community, helping the others prepare for the impending herd. Looking between the two women, he knew this was the way he could help them; by making sure no one noticed they were gone. Digging in his pocket, he pulled out a key and laid it in Ava’s hand before pulling the girl in a hug. Ava didn’t tense as she hugged him back.

“Stay safe.”

Ava nodded, holding him tighter before letting go. Aaron may see himself as the reaper, but to Ava, he was the one who gave her a new life. A life Enid needed to return to. After Maggie and Aaron shared an embrace of their own, the pair of travelers descended into the sewer system. Ava could feel the liquid embedding itself into her shoes as they walked the path, the light from their flashlights guiding them. The odors of sewage and rotting flesh mixed in an aroma that would make Ava want to vomit in any other circumstance. However, the goal of finding Enid kept all her senses focused.

“If he’s alive, he needs my help.” Maggie spoke as she led the way. “And if he’s dead, I don’t want to be waiting on him.”

Ava’s stomach twisted at the thought of Glenn being dead—and she almost broke down when putting Enid in that part. Her sister knew how to handle herself, when not to take risks, but if Enid did so much as twist an ankle, she would be in danger. Ava frowned, needing a distraction.

“Michonne and I tried to take his place.” She shook her head at the memory. “But it was his plan. He said he needed to be the one to do it.”

“That’s Glenn.” Maggie glanced at Ava, her own frown evident. “I had a sister.”

Ava looked at Maggie, taking in her sadness. She didn’t need to ask where her sister was, Ava already knew the answer from the look in her eyes. Instead, Ava gave a small smile.

“Then you know the struggle.” She joked as Maggie nodded. Ava sighed. “I knew she was unhappy in Alexandria. I expected moping, not this.”

“You’ll find her, and she’ll come back.” Maggie assured. “She needs you just as much as you need her.”

The sound of sloshing water echoed in the pipes, Ava allowing the silence to take over. At this point, Ava didn’t know if Maggie’s statement was true—and she was afraid to find out. Her thoughts were paused when the pair came across a ladder blocking the path, the metal rusted with grime growing all over it. Ava examined it, letting her flashlight shine over it.

“I’m guessing Aaron hasn’t been down here in a while.”

Maggie sighed. “Let’s try to get it out of here.”

Ava nodded as the two put their hands on the metal. After Maggie counted to three, the pair pulled the ladder towards them with no avail. Ava grunted as Maggie counted again, using all her strength to get it free. However, when it became loose, Ava lost her grip, allowing the metal to hit her in the forehead. The force of the collision made Ava fall backwards, her back hitting the water. Maggie called out her name, her tone laced with concern.

“I’m fine.” Ava reassured before taking in her surroundings. She groaned. “You know, besides being covered in shit.”

Maggie giggled, and Ava found herself giving a small laugh as well. It felt good to feel something other than despair. As always, the moment was fleeting when the snarls of a walker reached her ears. Digging for her knife in the water, Ava kept her eyes on the roamer as it crawled out of a side tunnel. Algae and fetus hung off it, and Ava couldn’t help but wonder what happened to the person beneath the rot.   

Maggie took out her knife, ready to stab the dead one in the head when another walker stuck to the wall came to life in front of her. The woman grunted as the rotter pinned her against the piping, making her unable to finish the job. Ava splashed in the water around her before grabbing her knife. Unsheathing it, she stabbed her approaching walker in the skull just as it touched her ankle.

Ava ignored the dizziness that overcame her as she got to her feet and made her way over to Maggie. Wrapping her arm around the rotter, Ava pushed the blade into its’ temple before throwing it to the ground with a splash. She kept her eyes on it, making sure it wasn’t coming back up before looking to Maggie, the woman panting. She didn’t expect Maggie to get rattled by the dead, and Ava found herself reaching out to her.

“You okay?” Ava asked, concern dripping from her words.

“Yeah.” Maggie breathed. “Thank you.”

Ava nodded, ready to state that doing so was why she was here, but didn’t get a chance when she saw Maggie’s eyes widen the moment she met her face.

“Ava, your head.” She dug through her pack, taking out a bandage. “Come here.”

 Ava put her fingers to her hairline, inspecting the blood that coated them. Seeing the damage made the pain worsen, the adrenaline fading as she walked up to Maggie. She put the bandage on the cut, the contact making Ava wince. She clenched her jaw in both agony and frustration. Ava didn’t even make it out of Alexandria before getting hurt; this couldn’t be happening, not when her life was still out beyond the walls.

“This could need stitches.” Maggie went on, her voice panicked. “Ava, just go back.”

All the pain was forgotten as she stared back at Maggie. There was no way she was turning back. Ava still had a job to do.

“Hell no.”

“I’ll find Enid.” Maggie attempted to convince her, gesturing to the wound. “That’s only going to get worse out there, and slow you down.”

“That’s my sister out there.” Ava fought to keep her voice low. “The only way you’re going to stop me is by shooting me in the head." 

Ava glared as Maggie leaned back, her lips pursed in thought. Enid was—is—the only family Ava has left. She wasn’t about to let a small injury stop her from getting Enid home. If anything, Ava would rather die out there trying than waiting in Alexandria. She kneeled down, picking up her discarded flashlight before looking back at Maggie.

“Lead the way.”

* * *

Enid let out a sigh as she placed some water in her hand, smoothing the liquid on the back of her neck. It was hot, the girl sweating through her shirt. She packed a few more, but Enid wasn’t ready to waste them just because she was feeling ‘uncomfortable’. Ava was thrilled when she saw that Alexandria had working washers and dryers; Enid grinned at the memory of seeing her older sister doing multiple loads on one of their first nights there.

She shook her head, clearing her brain of her older sister’s smile. Instead, she looked up at the sky. The sun was high, but it would be setting soon. Enid needed to find a place for the night, maybe even a few days to throw Ava off her scent. She continued walking, remembering something about a nearby town that housed empty stores. Perhaps she could find supplies, and a place to rest her head.

* * *

After the small outburst from Ava, the pair remained quiet as they trekked through the water. Maggie gave up on telling Ava to turn back, the woman not hearing any of it as she simply kept her eyes forward and ears up, listening for the dead. Maggie understood Ava’s determination, she may have been the only person in Alexandria now who felt the same way. They turned off their flashlights as natural light began to flood in the pipe, Ava doing her best not to run up to the gate at the end of the tunnel. However, when she did get up close, Ava didn’t feel relief.

Horror passed through her heart as she took in the herd of walkers. They weren’t facing the grate, their bodies piling onto one another as they attempted to get to the walls of Alexandria. Ava cursed to herself. Aaron did say that the system would lead them under the wall, but he didn’t say how far. Maggie sighed, feeling just as deflated as Ava looked.

“We’re still too close.”

Ava bit her lip as she clipped her flashlight to her belt. She wasn’t giving up, not when the outside was so close that she could taste the fresh air.

“We just have to get through a few of them.” She whispered as she pulled the key from her back pocket. “They walk, we run.”

Ava didn’t notice the nervous expression on Maggie’s face as she wrapped her hand around the bar of the grate. She only placed the key in the lock when she spoke up.

“No, we can’t.”

Ava turned to face the woman, taking in her wide eyes and fidgeting hands. She didn’t know what had her so spooked, but Ava wasn’t going to let it slow her down. Ava wouldn’t blame Maggie if she turned back, she just needed to accept that Ava wasn’t going to follow.

“You stay,” Ava compromised, thinking back to Maggie’s earlier plan. “I’ll find them both.”

She began to turn the key, ignoring Maggie’s quiet rejection of the plan. Ava didn’t care. She needed to accept it.

“No!” Maggie yelled. “It’s over!”

Her sudden rise in volume made Ava jump, taking the key out of the lock in the process. Ava looked at her in shock, wondering what came over her when a walker slammed itself against the bars. Maggie grabbed Ava by the arm, pulling her away from the grate as it became overcrowded with the dead.  Ava shook with anger as she watched their only exit become clogged with roamers. She turned to Maggie, ready to take her rage out, but couldn’t. Not after seeing her broken expression.

“I’m pregnant.”

At Maggie’s tearful confession, Ava felt her anger fade into something else. It explained why Maggie seemed off during the walker attack, and why she seemed so adamant on having Ava turn back. She didn’t want to be the liability. However, after seeing that there was truly no safe way out of the community, she needed to come clean to protect her unborn child. The stress of caring a secret was weighting on her, and Ava could see she reached the breaking point.  

“I burned the last picture of him because I told him I didn’t need it anymore. He didn’t want me to go out there and I said yes.” Maggie went on, tears falling from her orbs. “If I was with him, I could’ve helped him. I don’t know if he’s alive, but I just want to see his face.”

Ava felt her throat close. She didn’t have anything of Enid’s; not a picture, or a shirt she always wore. She didn’t know if she would ever see Enid’s face again, her smile when she tried to hide the fact that she found one of Ava’s awful jokes funny. She didn’t know if she would ever hear her voice again, the way the melodic sound would rise when she spoke about a passion of hers. All Ava had were her memories, and the fear of not knowing if they would have the chance to make new ones.

“I don’t get to know what will happen, or why it happened or what I did right or wrong.” Maggie sniffled, the sound making Ava close her eyes. “I have to live with that. You do, too.”

When she opened her lids, Maggie’s tear streaked face was all she could see. Neither of them would ever know if they did right by the people they lost—may have lost. All they could do was hope for the best. Ava pulled the woman into a hug, Maggie holding her tightly as Ava began to cry into her shoulder.

Ava cried for the past, and how she didn’t appreciate it the way she should have. She wept for the present, how she should have been the sister Enid needed, and not the coward she got. But, most of all, Ava sobbed for the future, and the uncertainty that came with it.

* * *

 

As much as Ava hated to admit it, Maggie was right. Their journey beyond the wall was over before it begun, and the pair made their way back towards Alexandria. They were quiet, but held hands the whole way back. They both lost the people most important to them, and if Maggie was anything like Ava, she needed to feel another person to know that they weren’t alone. The touch reminded Ava of Enid’s own hand in hers; a gesture the younger sister did when she was truly afraid. When Ava made it over the wall, and she knew she would, she wondered if Enid would hold her hand again.  

After closing the grate, the pair made their way to the Infirmary. Ava wasn’t surprised to see that Tara was with Denise. The two had grown exceptionally close ever since Tara healed up, and Ava couldn’t help but smirk as she watched Tara gaze at Denise as she stitched Ava up.

“Where the hell did you two run off to?” Denise asked as she bandaged up the cut.

Tara’s nose crinkled. “And why do you smell like garbage?”

Ava and Maggie shared a glance. They didn’t want anyone to know that they tried to leave—even if it was shared with two of the people Ava trusted.

“We were clearing the sewers, seeing if we could make it a temporary way out.” Ava lied. “We…failed.”

“Clearly.” Tara joked.

After a few more jokes from Tara, and receiving instructions from Denise, Ava and Maggie left the Infirmary in favor of their homes to change. If they couldn’t go beyond the wall to find their loved ones, they decided they could go on guard and wait for them to come home. Granted, Ava didn’t know if Enid would want to come back, but Maggie held the hope for her. Either way, it would be good to take out a few of the dead.

 With Carol’s permission, Ava climbed the ladder up to the scaffolding. Rosita was on guard at the moment, and Ava noticed how she quickly wiped away her tears when she heard approaching footsteps. It was easy for her to forget that Rosita was waiting on someone herself—no one knew the status of Abraham and his crew yet. She kept her eyes downcast as Ava walked forward, clearing her throat.

 “I’m your relief.”

Rosita didn’t look at her. “Carol was supposed to be up.”

“We traded shifts.”

The woman gave a small nod as she handed Ava her rifle. She could feel Rosita’s eyes on her as she checked the rounds, making sure that there would be enough if she needed to clear a path for the residents.

“You’re waiting for her.” She observed. Ava didn’t answer, and Rosita didn’t need one. “Do you think she’ll come back?”

Ava didn’t know what to say, mainly because she didn’t know her own answer. Maggie had said that Enid needed Ava, but how much did her younger sister need her if she left? Enid was growing up, she is grown up. Maybe it was time for her to accept that she wanted to go her own path. However, the other part of Ava could see Enid strolling up to the gates, ready to be pulled into Ava’s embrace. She turned to Rosita, offering a broken half-smile.

“I guess we’ll find out.”

Rosita offered her own sympathetic smile before patting Ava’s shoulder. As she descended the ladder, Ava turned to face the night, listening as the snarls of the dead filled it with warped music. She kept her eyes on the horizon, waiting for something that may never happen.

* * *

 

Three days. Enid counted the sunsets and rises as she watched them from the second floor of the store she settled in. It would be time to move on soon, but Enid enjoyed the silence that came with being surrounded by the dead. She could hear them in the alleyway next to the building, the noise reminding her that the world was running its course. It was dying, and the walkers were merely following the cycle.

On the second day, the noise began to fade. Enid looked out the side window, noticing the dwindling numbers as the roamers went in search for a meal. It was interesting, watching them. Enid always saw them as packs of meat, but they still had the capacity to know when to move on—when it was time to search for another sucker to eat.

When the third day began, Enid packed her belongings up. It was time for her to follow the dead’s lead, and move on. She knew Ava, and her sister was either searching every nook and canary of the woods , or she was refueling back in Alexandria. Either way, Enid had the distance she needed.

She opened the door to the roof, deciding to use the fire escapes as the means of transportation, Enid was about to descend when she noticed a figure in the alleyway. Moving to the edge of the roof, Enid watched as Glenn struggled to get water out of a crushed bottle. She cringed at his appearance; blood caked all over his skin, his shirt sticking to his sweating figure. Her heart sped up when she remembered that Ava was meant to be with him during the dry run. Did Ava even make it home to realize she was gone? Or worse, was she one of the dead ones Enid observed.

Before leaving the area, Enid needed answers. She needed to know if Ava was alive, and only one person could give them to her.

“Hey!” Enid called down to the man as she dug a water bottle out of her bag. “Heads up!”

Glenn didn’t attempt to catch the liquid as it fell into a puddle of blood. Enid rolled her eyes at the sight of a resource wasted.

“Shit.” She sighed before raising her voice for him to hear. “I _said_ heads up!”

Enid didn’t wait for a reaction as she ran back into the building, remaining on the second floor. She new Glenn would come after her. He needed answers too. She planned on giving them to him as soon as she got her own. When she heard the clattering of items, Enid couldn’t help but grin. He had arrived.

“Enid.” He called, “What are you doing out here?”

Even though he couldn’t see it, Enid shook her head. She wasn’t here to discuss her choices, or to pretend that Glenn cared.

“There’s another water bottle in the corner.’

Glenn didn’t answer, and Enid could picture him gulping down the liquid he hadn’t been exposed to in days. It was after a few moments when his voice carried up to her once more.

“What happened in Alexandria?”

Enid pursed her lips. “What happened is what always happens.”

“The herd broke through the walls?”

Enid’s heart rate picked up. “What herd?”

The herd in the quarry weren’t supposed to be dealt with yet. Rick wanted to take his time. Enid figured something went wrong, but for Glenn to think the herd made it to them made Enid question Ava’s fate. Did the herd get so off path that they took her down?

“The walkers broke out of the quarry early.” Glenn explained. “We got on them, but the sound…that airhorn--.”

“’We’?” Enid interrupted, suddenly anxious. “Was Ava with you?”

Glenn went quiet, the stretch of silence making Enid’s anxiety rise into her throat. She never anticipated Ava being the first to leave—Enid left because she didn’t want to see that. Enid left thinking that Ava was still alive, that she would live the life she deserved. The idea of being in a world without her made Enid shake.

“She and Michonne took the rest of the Alexandrians back to the community.” Glenn explained. “That was the last time I saw her.”

Enid closed her eyes, drowning out the rest of Glenn’s inquires. It was the uncertainty that was the worst part of it all; Enid didn’t know if Ava made it back to Alexandria, or if she died for the fools who didn’t know how to survive. She needed to get out of here; to get away from the memory of her older sister.

Grabbing her pack, Enid quickly went through the open window and onto the fire escape. When she heard Glenn’s heavy footsteps, Enid quickly descended the staircase before jumping down the rest of the way. She ignored Glenn’s yells, and the demons in her mind, as she disappeared into the woods.

 


	18. Still Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Glenn drags Enid back to Alexandria while Ava waits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> I'm glad to say Hurricane Irma spared me, and my family. We only lost power for two days, but thousands in FL are still without it. Make sure to donate (if you can). Thank you for the wishes of safety <3.

The days in Alexandria were starting to blur together for Ava. The hours dragged on with nothing being done about the herd below. She spent her time on the scaffolding, her eyes scanning over the dead. Ava could tell the herd was growing, the dead snarling as they reached for her body. Ava didn’t pay them much mind, her focus always on the horizon as she waited. Waited for Enid to return, to wrap her in her arms and promise never to be apart again. Ava didn’t know if that would ever happen, but Maggie told her that she had to have hope. The moment she lost it was the moment nothing mattered anymore.

Ava found herself spending a lot of time with Maggie. Without having Enid in the house, Ava found it hard to be in the building—it wasn’t home without her little sister. Maggie invited her to stay in one of the spare rooms of her house. Ava had a feeling she was lonely as well. Although Maggie believed that Glenn would come back, Ava could see the fear in her eyes that he wasn’t alive at all, and that it would be her responsibility to raise a child on her own.

She hoped Maggie knew that if Ava was around, she would never be alone.

However, Ava was beginning to have that same fear as she took over the guard shift from Morgan. As she squinted against the morning sun, Ava tried not to think about Enid being hurt, or worse, beyond the wall. Every cell in her body screamed at Ava to jump into the herd, to fight through them and get to the other side to resume searching for her sister. The impulse faded when Rick ascended the ladder.

“You don’t have to be up here so much.”

She didn’t need to look at him to see the pity in his eyes. Ever since Carl told him about Enid’s disappearance, all Rick could think about was Ava. He knew what it felt like to be helpless, for your only option to be to wait something out. It sucked, especially when you were a person of action. After seeing Ava walk around with a bandage on her head, Rick grew worried about the woman. Now wasn’t the time to become reckless, and Ava being constantly on watch wasn’t good for her mental state. She needed a break, but from the way she didn’t even glance at him when he spoke, Rick could predict her words.

 “She won’t bother trying to sneak in when we all know that she left.”

At this point, Ava figured Enid knew that her absence was noticed. If—when—Enid returned, she wouldn’t waste her energy trying to climb over a wall. Rick hummed before giving a small nod.

“When we got out there, it’s never easy. It’s always a fight.” He began, making Ava fidget with her gun. “But I know you two have come back from harder things. You taught Enid everything she knows, and that’s more than enough for her to survive.”

It was then Ava finally turned to look at Rick, his crystal blue eyes settling on her face. He could tell she hadn’t slept in days, despite relocating to Maggie and Glenn’s house. The corner of her lips rose in a small smile, the first time Rick had seen such a gesture in days.

“I saw Judith this morning.” Ava grinned. “She…reminded me of Enid, and how little she used to be. It made me happy for a bit to remember that, you know?”

Ava remembered the way her Dad would gently put Enid in her arms, reminding her to keep a hand behind her soft head. Even as a child, considering Enid’s brown orbs made Ava feel at peace, as if everything was going to be all right. Although that feeling was quickly disappearing for Ava, seeing Judith reminded her that nothing truly ever ends. The living carry what the dead left behind. Rick smiled.

“I do.” He then looked out into the herd before back at Ava. “How about I cover your shift? You can take a break, maybe go back to bed.”

 “I’m fine, Rick. Really.” Ava shook her head, quick to stop him. “This is something I have to do.”

Her tone was calm, but Ava kept her gaze locked on Rick, as if daring him to challenge her stance. Lucky for him, the leader understood as he gave a nod before disappearing down the ladder. Once he was gone, Ava looked forward once more, waiting for her sister to come over the hill.

* * *

 

Enid didn’t look back as she ran through the small town, tears threatening to form in her eyes. She didn’t want to talk to Glenn, or even be near him, after hearing about Ava. After taking a sharp turn into a diner, and occupying a booth, Enid put her head in her hands and breathed, trying to calm down. Just because Glenn didn’t know where Ava was didn’t mean she was in danger. However, the very chance that she was made Enid’s skin crawl.

Ava was supposed to be the one who thrived, not Enid.

Out of the corner of her eye, Enid spotted a discarded receipt. Pulling a pen out of her pocket, she quickly wrote three letters: JSS. Just seeing them made her heart rate calm down, and she made her way to the breakfast bar to pick up the pistol she had hidden there a few weeks ago. It was time for her to grow up and leave. Ava was fine; even if it wasn’t true, Enid planned on thinking that for the rest of her life. Ignorance was bliss, after all.

She walked to the entrance, opening the door just a crack to get a glimpse of her surroundings. Walkers passed through the streets, their snarls low and threatening. Enid planned to let them run their course when a hand wrapped around her mouth, pulling her back into the diner. She screamed into the palm, ready to bite when the person let her go. Turning around, Enid’s terrified state shifted into one of annoyance as Glenn closed the diner door, locking it.

“The hell are you doing?”

Glenn peeked through the shades, registering the dead in the streets. “I’m taking you home.”

Enid scoffed, knowing that would never happen. She had no reason to go with Glenn, she barely even knew him.

“Why should I trust you?”

Glenn stepped forward. “Why did you give me water?”

She stifled an eyeroll. She hadn’t expected him to read so much into a simple gesture. It was all planted in a selfish reason; Enid wanted to know about Ava, and Glenn couldn’t tell her anything with a parched throat. She shrugged.

“I had it, you needed it.” Enid answered simply. “That doesn’t make us friends.”

“I’m not your friend, but I am Ava’s.” Glenn walked past her. “I’m doing this for her.”

Enid pursed her lips as Glenn went to check the back door. Of course, he was doing this for Ava. Everyone in Alexandria seemed to love her despite her original hesitation for the community. Enid wasn’t jealous of the affection, she just knew that she would never get it. Enid accepted it.

“She isn’t there.” Enid swallowed the pain of saying such a statement. “You didn’t make it back. What makes you think she did?”

Glenn’s jaw clenched, as if wondering how she could say such a thing. Enid didn’t like the way it tasted in her mouth, but the moment she spoke it aloud, the more real it became. Ava wasn’t back in Alexandria, and if she wasn’t there, Enid didn’t have a reason to be.

“Wherever Ava is, she would want you back in Alexandria.” He spat before shaking his head. “I’m not having this conversation. Let’s go.”

He reached out to her, ready to grab her arm when Enid pulled back. Glenn stepped forward, but quickly backed away when Enid pulled a gun on him. She kept her breathing even as she aimed the gun at his head, hands shaking. She had never killed a person before—Ava was the one who did the dirty work. Glenn easily saw right through this.

“You’re not going to shoot me.”

She narrowed her eyes. “I will if you make me.”

Enid may not shoot to kill, but getting Glenn in the arm would at least slow him down. Before she could summon her courage to pull the trigger, Glenn wrapped his hand around the barrel, Enid loosening her grip on the weapon as he pushed it down. She didn’t fight as Glenn pulled the gun out of her hand, keeping his eyes on her before checking the ammo. Enid let her immaturity take over as she crossed her arms, shaking her head.

“Asshole.”

“You point a gun at me, and _I’m_ the asshole?”

 She bit the inside of her cheek, knowing that he had a point. However, if Ava taught her anything, it was always to trust her gut. And her gut didn’t know what to think of Glenn. Enid kept his eyes on him as he reloaded the gun, spouting instructions as he did so.

“We’re taking the road, we need visibility.”

Enid’s brows furrowed at his plan. To get to the town, Enid had stayed in the woods to avoid being seen by the dead—and other bad people.

“Why?” She asked.

Glenn dropped the gun to his side, an annoyed expression on his face. He had been trapped for days, desperate to go home to Maggie and their unborn child, and here was a girl in front of him who left willing. He didn’t know what occurred between Ava and Enid to make her want to leave, but he knew that Ava was trying her best, and didn’t deserve this from her little sister.

“Because half the herd broke off and they’re headed towards home.” He answered. “I guess you missed that when you were abandoning your family. Lead the way.”

Enid let out a loud exhale from her nostrils, trying to control her impulse to kick Glenn in the stomach. He didn’t have the right to judge her on the decision she made; he could pretend that he knew the full story, but he never would. Taking in his dark eyes, Enid knew better than to disobey him, and she took the lead.

If she was lucky, maybe the herd would separate them.

* * *

 

The road was empty, the silence between Enid and Glenn deafening as they kept their gazes forward. At some points, Enid could feel Glenn’s eyes on her, as if she was a puzzle that needed to be solved. Maybe that was true, but Enid didn’t want to be solved by a self-proclaimed martyr. She was ready to snap when he looked at her for the fifth time, but was cut off by familiar snarls. On the side of the road, a walker laid on its stomach, its’ legs chopped off as it attempted to pull itself forward. Enid took it upon herself to shove the blade through its temple, silencing its’ cries for good.

She wasn’t surprised when she looked up to see Glenn giving a look that could only be described as unimpressed.

“What?” Enid spat before standing up and examining the walker. “Think _Ava_ wouldn’t have wanted me to kill it?”

Her tone was dripping in mockery, and she was glad Glenn caught it. They may have gone on a few runs together, but Enid needed him to know that he didn’t know Ava—the real Ava. The one who killed two men without blinking an eye, and who would do it again without hesitation. She had spent her entire life with Ava, and he had only been with her for a few weeks; in her eyes, he needed to be knocked down a few pegs. Enid rolled her eyes as she walked on the grass, Glenn following on the road but stopped when Enid paused in front of three green balloons. The gear was meant to be a checkpoint for leading the herd away, but in Enid’s eyes, they were a tool. Using her knife, she cut the string as Glenn looked on slightly amused.

“We can use them to distract them.”  She noted as she tied the string to her bag.

“There’s a helium tank in those shrubs.” Glenn gestured to the bushes. “More balloons, more string.”

Enid studied him, making sure he wasn’t pulling her leg before going towards the shrubs. Dropping to her knees, she hid her gleeful expression as she set up the tank and balloons. On the concrete, Glenn crouched down, watching Enid with interest. Although he liked to think he and Ava were close, Glenn realized he didn’t know much about her—or Enid’s—story. He didn’t have a chance with everything in the community moving so quickly, but with this pause, now was the time. 

“How did you and Ava find Alexandria?”

She halted in her movement. Enid never had to tell anyone their story; Ron didn’t care, and when Carl asked, she was unable to speak a word about it. It was still too soon for her and couldn’t find the words. However, knowing that Glenn may be the only person she has left to speak to, Enid figured someone needed to know.

“Aaron found us and brought us in.” Enid responded. “Ava wouldn’t have gone, but I needed a doctor.”

That seemed to pique Glenn’s interest, and he recalled seeing a scar on Enid’s arm. “What happened?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Enid allowed the hissing sound of the helium to fill the air, blocking out anything Glenn would want to say. Letting herself get bit by that dog was one of Enid’s biggest regrets; if she had been more careful, and stronger, they may have never ended up in Alexandria at all. Their lives would still be theirs.

“What about your parents?”

Enid sighed. “Orphaned by walkers.”

She found that question much easier to answer; it didn’t hurt her pride. Enid knew she couldn’t stop her parents’ death—at least, not back then. She wasn’t trained for it. Enid never blamed Ava, not the way her older sister blamed herself. Their parents died the way most of the population went out; as the days went on, Enid realized their end was inevitable.

“Me too.” Glenn’s voice brought Enid back to reality. “Probably.”

Enid finished tying her balloon before turning around to face Glenn. The man wasn’t looking at her, his eyes focused on the distance. It was a look Enid knew she wore herself. He was remembering a time long ago, a time where the family was still by blood and not experience. At least she knew what happened to her parents, Glenn may never know. Enid turned back to her project, shrugging it off.

“It’s just what happens.”

Glenn hit the barrel of his gun on the concrete, his voice gentle. “I get that you’re scared.”

Enid’s grip tightened on the balloon, tight to the point she was surprised it didn’t pop. She turned back to him sharply.

“I’m not scared!” Even she knew that wasn’t convincing, but held her ground.

 “Yeah, you are.” Glenn was infuriatingly calm. “You don’t want to lose anything again, so you give up and say, _‘it just happens’_.”

She took a deep breath. Enid hated this. She hated that he could read her like an open book, however, he did get one thing wrong. Enid was okay with losing people, she just couldn’t stand to lose Ava; whether by her sister dying or getting sucked into a new way of life. It was why she left, and why she gave up on Alexandria.

“You honor the dead by going on. You live because they don’t get to.” Glenn went on. “You think your parents wanted you leaving Ava because you’re afraid?”

“We don’t have to talk!” Enid spat before going quiet. “We don’t have to talk.”

The two kept their gaze on the other until Enid went back to blowing up balloons, trying not to let his words get to her. Enid knew her parents wouldn’t approve of her decision, but she always figured that they were too dead to care. However, the idea of honoring them by living the life they would’ve wanted for her, and Ava, was a statement that remained latched onto her heart.

* * *

 

Spencer had taken over Ava’s watch in the late afternoon, the woman always reluctant to leave the post. She didn’t make eye contact as she handed the weapon over to him, afraid that the moment she looked at Spencer, she would punch him in the face. His smug attitude when Ava tried to leave Alexandria still rang in her head, and after finding out why she tried to leave, he hadn’t said a word to her. However, that seemed to change when Spencer spoke just as Ava was descending the ladder. 

“So, this is how it’s going to be now, huh?”

Ava paused on the ladder, thinking of the last couple of days. For the pair, it had been nothing but awkward encounters and sidestepping the other when they could. It didn't bother her as much as it seemed to bother Spencer, and for that, Ava felt a strange sense of power. She shrugged.

“For as long as I want it to be.”

“At least she’s alive.” He responded. “That’s more than I can say about half my family.”

Ava didn’t know what came over her as she stepped back onto the scaffolding. She walked right up to Spencer, the man slightly moving backwards as Ava jammed a finger in his chest.

“I don’t know if she is, Spencer. I can’t even go out and look for her.” Her voice was dangerously low. “I’m sorry about your dad and brother, really I am, but at least you know what happened.”

Spencer didn’t say a word, but continued to stare Ava down. His expression was blank, but Ava could see his hold on the rifle tighten at her words. If Enid did die out there, Ava would never know until she found her corpse walking the Earth. She wouldn’t know how it happened, or if she could’ve saved her if she just braved the walkers. The thought made her want to vomit, and she wanted Spencer to know that he had never felt the way she did.

“You’re lucky.” Ava added. “That’s all you are.”

He looked away as Ava descended the ladder, her boots hitting the concrete harder than needed as she stomped away from the gate. She didn’t see anything in Spencer, besides his anatomy, and the conversation only proved that it was all he had.

“Ava!” Rosita’s voice made Ava stop. “Want to show off your technique?”

Ava took in the scene in front of her. Rosita took it upon herself to help train the residents of Alexandria; they were going to need it once the herd broke through. Ava noticed the way Rosita seemed to glance between Spencer’s post and Ava, the woman realizing that her anger towards him may not have been as subtle as she had hoped.

Rosita wanted to provide a distraction, and Ava was happy to accept it.

* * *

 

“My God.”

Glenn took the words right out of Enid’s mouth as the two surveyed Alexandria from a distance. Walkers surrounded the community from all sides, and Enid could see more joining the pack. She felt her hands begin to shake. It was over for Alexandria. It was over for Ava; if she was still outside, she would never be able to get back in. However, Enid realized that was preferred to being within the walls. The idea of her sister being ripped apart by the dead made Enid turn around, ready to disappear into the woods and escape the helpless feeling within her. She couldn’t watch this world take away Ava when there was no way to save her. Enid had already gone through that with her parents, only this time, she had the option to disappear.

“Stop.” Glenn called after her, running in front of Enid when she didn’t listen. “I said stop!”

“What’s the point?” Enid’s voice shook with emotion. “The world is trying to die. We’re supposed to let it.”

“No, we’re not supposed to let the world die.” Glenn shook his head, disgusted by her words. “And I sure as hell am not going to let you die.”

Enid looked up at him, his eyes reading her once more. She was worried he could feel the fear radiating off of her, the fear that it was already too late to save the last person she cares about. She pursed her lips.

“Ava will understand." She swallowed the lump in her throat. "If she's even in there.”

“This isn’t just for her anymore.” Glenn admitted, making Enid look down. “Look, the walls are still up, the houses are still up. Ava is waiting for you, I can feel it.”

She looked up at him, searching his face for any sign of bullshit. All she got back was a genuine expression of concern. He truly believed that Ava was in there, just waiting to have Enid back in her life. Enid tried to feel that hope, wanting to feel Ava’s presence, but came up short. Her mind was filled with horrible scenarios that were too deep to get out. Glenn sensed her hesitance.

“If she’s not there, we’ll figure it out.” He reassured. “Together.”

Enid remembered her parents; how they wouldn’t want her to turn away when she was so close to finding out the truth. Close enough to, possibly, be reunited with Ava. Whether it was their memory, or Glenn’s optimism, Enid would never know what made her nod and follow Glenn down into the community.

* * *

 

The hour long training session hit a water break, but Ava wasn’t exposed to her thoughts for long as Tara and Eugene joined Rosita and herself for a quick chat. Ava grinned as she listened to the trio joke with one another, the conversation offering a good distraction. With the way Tara and Rosita would involve her, Ava had a feeling that was the goal of the interruption. Ava didn’t mind. It felt nice to be taken care of in a way that was beneficial for her.

“Whoa.” Tara interrupted. “Look at that!”

Ava followed her finger to the sky, the blue a perfect backdrop for the green balloons rising in the air.  She stepped forward, feeling her heart pound as the sunlight gleamed off the latex. It wasn’t a coincidence, it was a flare. She could picture her little sister finding the checkpoint, amused by the party supplies, and convincing herself that it was for the walkers. Ava could see Enid using them as a signal for her. Hell, Ava could feel it to the point that she was running towards them, as if she could reach up and catch them. 

 Instead, Ava ran into Carl, the boy too distracted by the balloons to notice Ava until she knocked into him. She held onto his shoulder to steady herself.

“It’s Enid.” She breathed. “It has to be.”

Carl nodded, a small grin on his face. “I know.”

The two shared a smile. Ava was glad she had someone who agreed with her; and it was the only other person Enid had let in. Even if it wasn’t her, the hope that Ava felt was a feeling she had thought she lost a long time ago. It was nice to revel in it. However, the creaking of wood made the warmness in Ava’s heart grow cold as she looked towards the tower. It was then she saw the building tip on its side slightly before beginning its journey to the ground. Ava gripped onto Carl’s shirt.

“Get down!” She called to him, and whoever was listening.

The pair ran before ducking to the grass, Ava flinging herself over Carl to protect him. The creaking sound of the tower cut through the air before colliding with the metal, and Ava could feel the dust wash over her as the fall completed. A moment of silence passed before it was replaced with the snarls and growls of the dead, and Ava looked up to see the herd making its’ way through the down gates. They had finally got what they wanted, and were ready to feast.

Ava rolled off Carl before pulling her pistol out of her thigh holster. She stayed on the ground as she shot a few roamers that got too close, hoping to give Carl time to get up and run away. However, as he plunged a knife into the dead that was coming from behind them, Ava should’ve known better than to assume he would’ve ran away from a fight. He was too much like Enid for his own good.

She stood up, kicking a walker down before stomping a booted foot onto its’ head. She then turned to Carl, the two getting a break as Ava tried to think of a plan. Looking at Carl, she knew she had to get him to Rick. The leader would need to be close to his son to function.   

“We have to find your dad.”

Carl nodded. “I think he’s this way.”

It was all she had to go on as she followed Carl into the dust and debris. She shot down the walkers that threatened to get in their path, hoping to keep it clear. The plan was going well until Carl tripped and fell to the concrete, Ava quickly covering him before her gun clicked empty. She groaned, sliding it in the holster as she went to Carl, helping him up. She bit her lip when she saw a horde of walkers making their way towards them, already too close for comfort. Keep her arms around the boy, Ava took her knife out, ready to defend the two from the small crowd when the four walkers’ heads got sliced clean off.

Michonne stepped through the dust, her katana still out and ready. Ava wanted to cry, knowing she hadn’t seen such a beautiful sight as her savior.

“Thanks.” Ava spoke the only word that she could.

“No problem.” Michonne nodded, nodding towards the street. “This way!”

Ava stayed close as the trio ran through the grass, the feeling of concrete underneath their shoes signaling they were back on the main road. It was then Ava saw Rick, the man holding an injured Deanna as Ron and Gabriel followed him. Michonne started making her way towards him, Ava and Carl next to her.

“Rick!”

Rick turned to see Ava, Michonne, and Carl joining his own little group. He let out a relieved sigh, but didn’t get too comfortable as he kept hobbling with Deanna.

“Good, you’re safe.” He nodded to the small group. “Come on!”

Ava and Michonne took up the front, Ava stabbing her knife into walkers while Michonne sliced them. The kills meant nothing, for each time Ava took one out she swore three more took its’ place. She stopped running, the group following suit as walkers began to circle around them, closing in on Ava and her friends. It felt like the end until gunshots rang out, clearing a path for the group. Ava was more than a little shocked to see Jessie taking the shots as she stood in front of her porch.

“Over here!” She yelled over the chaos. “I have Judith!”

The group followed Jessie up the steps of her porch, Ava taking up the back to make sure none of the dead tried to sneak in. Once she was inside the house, Ava slammed the door and locked it, cutting them off from the community that had turned into a war zone. 


	19. Shelter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Alexandria gets overrun, the residents struggle to find a way out.

 

If Enid hadn’t witnessed it, she wouldn’t have been able to believe that the tower took out the gates. What once seemed so sturdy was now a welcome mat for the dead as they wandered into Alexandria, claiming the land for their own. She figured it always belonged to the roamers, the community was temporary. She didn’t blink as Glenn paced behind her, his breathing rapid as he struggled to formulate a plan. 

“The walkers are flooding into the east wall.” Glenn hastily observed. “That means the west wall will be the first to clear up. That’s how we get in.”

 She felt the air of him walking behind her hit her back, but Enid still didn’t follow. In her eyes, they had just witnessed the end of Alexandria. Enid didn’t see a point in getting taken down along with it. Glenn took in her defeated expression, sighing.

“Just because the tower fell doesn’t mean that…” He closed his eyes, collecting himself before standing in front of Enid. “Listen, people are still alive in there.”

Enid’s vacant eyes went from the herd to Glenn. She resisted the urge to laugh. People may be alive, but not for long; they couldn’t even wield a simple knife. On the off chance that Ava was in there, Enid knew she wouldn’t last. Her heart was too big when it came to Alexandria and the people within it. She would defend the weak, and get herself killed in the process. When you stop being selfish, that’s how it ends.

“This is how it happens.” Enid spoke, her voice hoarse. “And it always happens, Glenn.”

As always, Glenn didn’t have time for her angst. Especially now that they were so close to home.

“We’re still here.” He fired back. “Our friends are in there; your _sister_ is in there.” She flinched slightly as Glenn went on. “My pregnant wife.”

Her features twisted into shock as she looked at Glenn, his eyes brimming with frustrated tears. Even with a pregnant Maggie at home, Glenn still took the time to bring her back for Ava. Enid’s heart sank at the realization that she wasn’t dealing with a martyr, but a man who was genuinely caring. He was right, she was the asshole.

“You just want to run away, be afraid, forget about this? Just go.” He continued, finally speaking everything he had wanted to since cracking Enid. “But that’s how you lose people. Even after they’re gone.”

The two engaged in a stare down until Glenn looked away and walked towards the west, not caring if Enid followed or not. He had given her the tools to make a choice, and now it was up to her to do what she felt was right. Enid let out a shaking breath, putting her hands on her knees. She wanted to walk away, to never even think about Alexandria again, but Glenn’s words rang in her head.

 She was afraid. Afraid of facing Ava—alive or dead. Even if she carried an apathetic attitude, Enid knew it was a way to hide the fact that it was fear that ran her life.  She learned how to fight because she was afraid, and she didn’t want to stay in the community because she was terrified of forgetting all she knew. 

It was on the outskirts of Alexandria that Enid decided she couldn’t let her fear rule her any longer. If Ava wasn’t in there, Enid would do all she could to defend the community she had grown to love. Enid was ready to fight, and she would do it for her sister.

* * *

 

Once they found refuge inside Jessie’s house, every movement was a blur. Rick rushed Deanna up the stairs, resting her body on the spare room’s bed while Ava pushed the nightstand away, giving Michonne room to sit down beside the leader and start inspecting her wounds. Judith’s cries illuminated the air, drowning out Deanna’s own hollers of agony. While Rick went to check on the child, Ava crouched next to Deanna’s bed side, holding her hand. Deanna squeezed it, allowing all the pain she felt to get channeled into the grip.

Ava closed her eyes, the touch bringing her back to the day that a dog bite put Enid in the same position. She remembered the way her younger sister’s screams sliced the air, and how they cut Ava’s heart open. Ava had wished she could project the suffering on herself, to make it end for the young girl on the metal table. The same girl that was now missing from Ava’s life. If Enid had gotten hurt outside the walls, Ava hoped her end came swiftly. The very thought made Ava squeeze Deanna’s hand even harder, the grip making the woman scoff.

“Hey, I’m the one being poked here.” Her joking tone made Ava open her eyes.

Deanna’s cries had ceased, her face only contorting in agony when Michonne wiped alcohol across the large cut on her leg. Ava noticed that the house was much quieter—except for the muffled music playing nearby. It was the calm in the middle of a storm, and Ava needed to revel in it instead of getting lost in her thoughts. Forcing a smile, Ava let out an empty laugh.

“Right.” She loosened her grip. “Sorry.”

Although Ava rested her gaze on their hands, she could feel Deanna studying her, as if she could find out what she was thinking just by keeping an even stare. Ava should’ve known that nothing gets past Deanna Monroe. However, before the founder of Alexandria could speak, Rick jogged into the room. He looked between the trio of women, a slight pant to his words.

“How is she?”

“Well, Ava almost ripped my hand off.” Deanna teased. “And, no offense to Michonne, but whatever she’s doing hurts like a son of a bitch.”

Ava grinned, giving a small shake of her head. “The wit was unharmed, clearly.”

A shaky sigh of relief escaped Rick, his own mouth threatening to turn up in an expression of glee. Michonne let out a small laugh herself as she finished tying a bandage to the leg, positioning herself to begin wiping the blood off Deanna’s side.

“I’m just finishing the leg.” She informed the room. “And that seems to be the worst of--.”

 When Michonne’s words trailed off, Ava followed her line of sight to Deanna’s skin only to let out a small gasp. It was hard to miss the giant bite mark on her stomach, the mark still gleaming with red. Ava shook her head. This couldn’t be happening, not to Deanna. The leader could be a pain, but she was still one of the strongest people Ava had met. This felt like a cop out, a shameful way for such a firecracker to go out.

She looked over to Rick as Deanna examined the wound herself. The man already had his eyes on Ava, as if waiting for her to say that it wasn’t what they thought. However, it was Deanna that gave them all the confirmation they needed.

“Well,” The councilwoman shook her head, a slight quiver to her lips. “Shit.”

* * *

 

Rick and Michonne left the room, Ava assuming to talk about how to deal with Deanna’s fate. Out of everyone, Deanna seemed to be the one taking the news the best. She cracked a few jokes about Michonne and Rick leaving the room, Ava doing her best not to laugh too loudly. Maybe the Alexandrians weren’t that closed off as Ava had thought; if Deanna was this calm about her death, it meant that some semblance of reality rested within the community. If they survived this, maybe they could work with that.

“This place has a future.” Ava didn’t realize she was speaking aloud until she felt Deanna shift next to her. “I…didn’t see it at first, but after seeing you and Rick, I can.”

Deanna nodded towards the window. “Even now?”

Ava glanced at the glass, slightly frowning at the dead clogging the streets. They were parasites, and Ava wished she could destroy them by the heat of her glare. However, looking at them, she wasn’t worried. Vermin could be extinguished.

“Even now.” Ava confirmed with a firm nod.

Deanna let out a small chuckle, her head shaking in amusement. Her eyes glazed in thought, and Ava was content in leaving the woman to whatever came up in her mind at the end.

“I’m lucky, Ava.” Deanna smiled up at her. “Working with my family towards a better future is—it’s all I ever wanted. That’s what I got, right up to the end.” The smile faded, her eyes scanning Ava’s expression. “What do you want?”

The question took Ava off guard. She wanted a home for Enid, a place where she could grow up into the beautiful woman Ava knew she already was. Ava closed her eyes, letting out a sigh before opening them again.

“Enid.” She breathed. “I want Enid to come back.”

Unlike the rest of the community, Deanna didn’t look at Ava with pity. She rested a hand on top of Ava’s, the girl looking at the touch before looking back at Deanna, the woman offering a knowing smile. It was as if she knew something Ava didn’t, and Ava wanted nothing more than for her to share the secret.

“After that.”

“I want Enid to see this place like I do.” Ava’s mind kept going to her little sister, and a soft smile graced her lips when she thought of Enid finally at peace. “I want her to live a long life in Alexandria.”

Deanna ran her hand across Ava’s palm, her mouth now in a thin line. She was glad that Ava wanted so much for her sister, but it wasn’t the answer she was waiting for. Ava leaned forward, waiting for Deanna’s reaction.

“ _You_ , Ava.” She studied Ava’s face. “What do you want for you?”

Ava leaned back in her chair, letting the question wash over her. Every moment had been devoted to what was best for Enid. Her younger sister was her entire life now, and Ava didn’t mind it. That was what having a family meant; putting another person needs before your own. However, even when settled in Alexandria, Ava never thought about what she wanted from the place besides for it to be good enough for Enid.

Hell, Ava didn’t know what she wanted her life to be—now that she didn’t have to focus on getting through each day, she didn’t know how to live it. Ava swallowed, and the silence was all the answer Deanna needed as she let out a soft laugh.

“You better find out.”

The words were whispered, but prominent enough to make Ava flinch. Nevertheless, Ava nodded to the dying woman, hoping to bring her peace. She would try to find out what she wanted out of this life, but first, she had to get through today.

* * *

 

Panicked flooded Ava’s mind as she peered out the front windows of Jessie’s home. She tightened her grip on the fabric of the curtains as she watched the dead flood into the garage, their knocks against the barricaded door vibrating within her chest. She had been sitting with a sleeping Deanna when Rick and Jessie called for help, the pair bracing the door with a couch as rotting fingers poked through the openings. Ava and Michonne dragged the kitchen table to the door, resting it against the leather sofa while Carl and Ron brought down nightstands.

However, with the way the garage was quickly filling up, the barricade wouldn’t last long. That became evident when a crash echoed through the house, the noise making Gabriel flinch beside her. It was then Jessie came padding into the room, her exasperated expression reflecting Ava's own mood.

“They knocked the sculpture over.” She informed, her tone dripping with urgency.

“All that noise,” Michonne shook her head. “It’s drawing more.”

Judith’s cries rang through the house, Rick taking a leave to go retrieve the child. Ava kept watch, her eyes slightly widening when she saw them making their way to the window. Grabbing Gabriel’s arm, she pulled him backwards just as the palms started pelting the window. Michonne backed up as well, unsheathing her katana while Ava took out her knife. She then turned to Jessie, Ron, and Gabriel; their expressions full of worry. She understood they were scared, but now wasn’t the time to let fear win.

“Make sure you have weapons on you.” Ava instructed. “A kitchen knife, a fork. Anything.”

Jessie nodded, taking Ron by the arm as they went to the kitchen, Gabriel following behind. Ava sighed, her fingers dancing on the handle of her knife.

“I would kill for my bow and arrow right now.”

Michonne let out an airy laugh. “We can run and get it if we’re _really_ quick.”

Ava looked over at her, mirroring the soft smile on the woman’s face. It was odd to her that most of the residents in Alexandria saw Michonne as cold. The more Ava got to know her, the more she saw a woman with a sense of humor and a beautiful smile to match. Ava was about to fire back when the shattering of glass made them look to the window. The walkers’ arms extended into the living room, Michonne quick to slice them off as Ava began to barricade the opening.

Gabriel and Carl were quick to come to her aid while Jessie called for Rick. Ava and Gabriel lifted a coffee table, Carl hovering as they ran to the window, forcing it into the opening. The entire group put their body weight upon it, keeping the dead out. Jessie’s whimpers filled the air, and Ava could feel her own throat letting out a groan as she channeled her strength. She felt a bit at ease when Rick took the spot next to her, his jaw clenched.

“There’s just too many of them!” Gabriel yelled.

Ava wanted to tell him to not waste energy stating the obvious when the garage door thudded to the ground. She backed off the table, watching as the dead streamed into the house. Unsheathing her knife, Ava took a deep breath before yelling to the group.

“Upstairs, now!”

Ava grabbed onto the collar of a walker’s shirt, dragging him forward before inserting her knife into his eye. She let him drop to the ground before moving onto the next one, backing away with each kill. When she reached the bottom stair, Ava kicked a roamer in the chest, sending it into one of its’ buddies and making them both immobile.

“Let’s block the stairs!” Rick yelled as he descended the staircase, “Grab the couch!”

Ava followed him down, staying behind the seat as the pair made their way back up the stairs. The seat fit cozily between the wall and banister, the dead snarling as they reached for Rick and Ava. It was then Rick turned to Ava, and she could see the urgency in his eyes.

“I got this one, you get the one next to it.” He instructed, getting his hatchet ready. “We’re going to need at least two.”

Ava squinted in confusion, but got her knife ready. She knew better than to question Rick; the man seemed to have a way out of any situation. She nodded, the silent agreement all he needed as he hacked at the dead one’s head, making it fall to the ground. Ava then stepped forward, sticking her blade into one’s forehead. Before it fell to the stairs, Ava grabbed it by the shirt and pulled it towards her.

Ava dragged the being with her. “Super curious on what your next step is here, Rick.”

“You’re not going to like it.”

From the tone of his voice, Ava had a feeling he wasn’t a fan of the plan himself. Carl and Ron moved out of the way, giving Ava room to drag her body into the bedroom. Gabriel and Jessie looked on in disgust and confusion while Ava simply shrugged. They had questions, and Ava didn’t have any answers.

“We’re gonna need bed sheets, enough for everyone.” Rick panted as he dragged his own body in.

Ava helped him lay the corpse next to her own before looking up at him with furrowed brows.

“Sheets for what?” She asked.

“We’re going to gut these things. Cover ourselves with the insides to mask our smell to them.” Rick looked around the room. “If we stay calm and don’t draw attention, we can get to the armory.”

Ava sat on her ankles, realization coming over her like a tidal wave. On the road, she and Enid were often covered in the guts of the dead—sometimes weeks at a time when they couldn’t find new clothes. She recalled how the roamers always seemed to keep their distance, as if they lost interest in them—it was because they thought that they were part of the dead. She shook her head in amazement, wishing she put those facts together sooner. It would've made runs a lot smoother.

Without saying a word, Ava sliced her knife through the stomach of the walker. The smell was revolting, and Jessie let out a small gag at the sight. Ava looked up, noticing the disapproval on the mother, and Gabriel’s, face. Ron glared, an Ava didn’t know if he was upset about the situation or the man who offered the plan. Either way, Ava looked between all of them.

“They’re in the house, we can’t stay here.” Ava assured, hoping she was getting through to them. 

Michonne studied t he group. "Anyone who does is going to die."

Ava scanned their faces, and she let a quivering nod from Gabriel speak for all of them as she went back to work. Following Rick’s lead, Ava began pulling out the intestines of the body. As she held the organs in her bare hands, Ava realized this was the most human she had ever seen the dead. Beneath all the rot and grime, they were still people. Once Jessie got the bed sheets, the group turned them into makeshift ponchos, smearing the gore on the white fabric. Ava had just finished covering her entire front when Jesse knelt beside her. The blonde stared into the dead body, her eyes glazed. Ava’s own heart sank at the sight—she needed to help her, or Jessie wouldn’t make it.

“I’ll do your back if you do mine.” Ava softly suggested, holding up the guts.

Jesse gave a ghost of a smile before nodding and turning around. Ava began working on the back, painting a sick picture of death.

“When I first met you, I never thought we’d end up here.” Jessie shook her head.

Ava jokingly chortled. “Really? This is exactly how I pictured it.”

Jessie let out an airy laugh, Ava glad to offer some sort of relief. The laughter faded into a sigh.

“We all underestimated you, and Enid.” Jessie added. “For that, I’m sorry.”

Ava blinked, wondering where all of this was coming from. She knew the community didn’t see her, or Enid, as a threat—at least, not until she punched Aiden out. They were wrong, and Ava didn’t need to prove anything to them. She smeared the last of the white away.

“There’s nothing to apologize for.” She patted her back. “Okay, now me.”

Jessie nodded as Ava turned around, lifting her hair off the sheet. She hadn’t even felt her soaked hands on her back when Sam’s small voice cut through the room, his body shaking as he asked for his mother. Jessie quickly got to her feet, hoping to calm him down. Ava was about to get up herself when she felt firm hands on her back, smearing the guts.

“Looked like you needed help.” Rick’s drawl hit her ears.

Ava grinned. “Thanks.”

“Michonne told me she found you with Carl.” He began, and Ava was surprised that he was speaking in such a tense time. “Thank you for keeping him safe.”

Ava’s gaze fell on Carl. He stood still as Michonne enveloped his form in deep red; unlike Sam, he didn’t flinch at the sight of innards on his being. She couldn’t help but be reminded of Enid whenever she looked at him. They were both kids who adapted to their environment quicker than most adults. They were wise, but reckless. She shook her head.

“He kept me safe, too.” Ava grinned. “He knows what he’s doing, Rick. You should be proud.”

Although she wasn’t facing them, Ava could feel his pride. She had felt it as well whenever she looked at Enid.

“You should be too.” Rick added. “Enid’s a smart girl.”

Ava smiled, but couldn’t find any words to say. Enid was skilled in the world outside, and it was this skill that made Ava hopeful she would come home. However, if she was still alive, Ava feared that she saw Alexandria and assumed the worst; maybe she back, saw the damage, and left without batting an eye. It was the smart move, but it was also the one that broke Ava beyond comprehension.

“We have to go.”

Michonne’s hushed warning took Ava out of her thoughts. Rick finished Ava’s back before standing up, Ava following suit as she went out into the hallway. She looked over the banister, taking in the horde that had made a home in the Anderson living room. It would be a tight squeeze, but if this tactic worked the way Rick said it would, they wouldn’t have a problem.

 Rick’s footsteps made Ava turn around, the man holding Judith. She lifted Carl’s sheet, allowing him to hand his son the baby. The coverage of the drenched sheet would be enough to mask her smell, and all Ava could do was hope that Judith wouldn’t cry. Ava and Michonne descended the staircase, gently moving the couch. Ava froze, waiting for the walkers to journey towards them. However, none of them came. She looked over at Michonne, the woman looking just as relieved as Ava felt before looking up the stairs and nodding.

The group made their way towards them, and soon they were all maneuvering their way out of the cramped living space. Despite the plan working, and the group making their way onto the porch, Ava couldn’t calm her beating heart down. This didn’t feel natural—all she wanted to do was fight her way through the herd.

Ava stifled a laugh. Wanting to fight the dead wasn’t a ‘natural’ response either.

Carl reached behind him, and Ava took his waiting hand before offering her own to Jessie. It was the easiest way they could make sure no one got separated—or eaten. Ava felt Jessie’s fingers intertwine with her own with a squeeze. It was a gesture of comfort, and on that Ava took as teamwork; they were in this together.

And, as they became a part in the crowd of walkers, Ava realized all they had was each other. 

* * *

 

Enid watched as Glenn led the way into the Chapel. As he barked out unfinished plans and orders, she made sure that the mahogany doors were securely shut; although they only planned to stay here for as long as it took to search for weapons and come up with a way to save Maggie, Enid didn’t want any surprises. She was done with those for a while.

“Look in the Bibles.” From his spot at the altar, Glenn pointed towards the pews. “They could’ve hollowed out the pages.”

Enid blinked, slightly horrified. “Are you serious?”

She wasn’t particularly religious—her parents only took her, and Ava, to Church on holidays—but the idea of ruining a Bible still made her feel sick to her stomach. She flipped through the pages, searching for any sort of tampering. When she was ready to move on to the next pew, her eyes landed on a phrase above the door: _Faith without works is dead._

Glenn continued to list items behind her, but Enid wasn’t listening. It was as if all she could do was focus on the sentence written in perfect script. She thought about what Glenn had told her before—how she had to live for those who didn’t make it.  Perhaps that was her purpose on this Earth; to be what her parents wanted her to be, to be who Ava always knew she was. Even then, Enid didn’t know if she understood the stance.

“When I wanted to run…you said that’s how you lose people, even after they’re gone.” Enid’s hoarse voice broke the silence, and she heard Glenn’s shuffling cease. “What the hell does that mean?”

She didn’t turn to face him, her eyes lingering on the words forever tattooed on the Church. Maybe if she stared at them long enough, the meaning would become clear.

“The people you love, they made you who you are.” Glenn explained. “They’re still part of you. If you stop being you, that last bit of them that’s still inside of you…it’s gone. Who are they to you?”

The words became blurry, Enid’s vision becoming glassy with unshed tears. She thought about her parents, how they formed her into the person she was before all of this. Enid was grateful for them, and she missed them dearly. However, her mind went to Ava even quicker. Whether she was alive or not, it was Ava who taught her what she needed to know. It was Ava who reminded her that her humanity had to be kept in this world—no matter how many times Enid wished she could shed it. Ava taught her that her emotions would always be valid, that she was capable of anything.

“My parents.” Enid answered before giving a shaky sigh. “Ava.”

Enid wanted nothing more than for Ava to be waiting for her outside the Chapel doors, to whisk her away to safety. When she opened her eyes and saw Glenn’s own glassy eyes, Enid knew she wasn’t the only one who held such a feeling. When they first reached Alexandria, Glenn assured her that Ava was still inside, alive. However, after taking that brisk walk through the walker-filled streets, Enid could see that his own faith was shaken. He leaned down to her, his voice low.

“Then they’re still here, ‘cause you’re still here.”

Slowly, Enid nodded, showing Glenn that she finally understood his ramblings. If she was alive, Ava and her parents would be too; and she wasn’t going to let them down. With a soft smile, Glenn gave her a pat on the shoulder.

“I want you to stay put.”

Enid’s eyes narrowed as Glenn walked more into the Chapel, continuing his search. There was no way she was staying in the Chapel, not when Maggie needed her help. If Ava was here instead of her, her older sister wouldn’t sit around either. She would go out there and do her best to save the pregnant woman.

“I can handle myself.” She began her defense, following his every move. “You said you wanted help.”

“No, I didn’t want you to give up on this place, or these people.” Glenn corrected, making Enid roll her eyes. “To be afraid.”

Enid pursed her lips. He had gotten what he wanted, and it was something Enid wanted for herself. Yet, that was even more of a reason for her to go out there.

“You were right.” She lowered her voice. “I’m here now, and I’m going out there and I’m helping you. Ava would do it.”

Ava would want Enid to do it, too. She loved Maggie, and Enid didn’t want anyone else to die by the hands of rotting flesh. She watched Glenn’s jaw clench in thought. She felt bad for throwing Ava in his face, but she couldn’t help the fact that it was the truth. His silence made Enid sigh. They didn’t have time for this. She offered a small smile.

“You look for the Bible-Glock, and I’ll make something Maggie can climb down on.”

Glenn closed his eyes before nodding. “Okay.”

Enid’s smile grew as she nodded herself. She didn’t waste any time going back to work, the weight of Glenn’s gaze on her back lifting when he continued his search. Enid took a breath, ready to honor the memory of those she had lost—and perhaps find her own purpose. 

* * *

 

The sunset cast an orange hue over Alexandria. It was one of those evenings where Ava and Enid would sit on their front porch and talk about their days, the conversation lasting long after the sun went down and the mosquitoes came out. Those moments lasted until Enid grew cold, and as Ava walked through the herd that took over their community, she realized that they would never happen again. Enid was long gone. It hurt Ava, but she figured it was for the best that she didn’t come home. Especially now that there wasn’t a home to come back to.

The armory was still a good distance away, but Ava was starting to lose hope in the plan. A few gunshots weren’t going to distract a herd this size—a herd that was still growing as more filtered through the broken walls. This became clear to Rick as well, the man leading the chain they created towards the grass by the lake; it was the only spot of green in a sea of dead. Ava let go of Jessie and Carl’s hands as the group formed a circle around Rick. The only person left out was Michonne, the warrior keeping watch as Rick sighed.

“All right, new plan.” He whispered. “There’s too many walkers, and they’re too spread out to follow flares. We need our vehicles back at the quarry. All of us drive, we’ll round them up.”

Ava pursed her lips. The last place she wanted to go to was the quarry; the place where everything seemed to go wrong. It was also far away. Ava feared that their travel time would take too long, and they would come back to triple the walkers. However, the options were limited, and she found herself nodding.

“Okay.” Jesse agreed. “But Judith…to the quarry and back?”

Ava watched as Rick ran a hand down his face. She was right, there was no way Judith could make it all the way to the quarry. It was pure luck that she hadn’t made a whimper throughout their walk, and Ava knew luck always ran out. Ava swallowed.

“If you need someone to stay, I’ll stay.” Ava volunteered. “I can bring her to Denise’s house.”

Ava didn’t want to stay, but if it was what the team needed, she’d do it. She knew how much Rick loved his kids, and protecting Judith he would only let someone he trusted do. And Rick did trust Ava, more than anyone he had met in Alexandria. However, he trusted her because she knew what it was like out there—what she was capable of. He needed that.

“I need you out there.” Rick vocalized his thoughts. “You’ve done this before.”

Ava sighed. “I know, but Judith is--.”

“I’ll take her.”

Ava and Rick followed the voice to see Father Gabriel standing behind them. He looked between the two before focusing on Rick. It was the first time Ava had seen his face devoid of fear, his expression hardened.

“I’ll keep her safe in my church until you all lead the walkers away.”

Michonne turned away from the walkers. “Can you do this?”

“I’m supposed to. I have to.” He then turned back to Rick. “I will.”

Ava watched as Rick studied him. Gabriel’s eyes conveyed nothing but truth, and it seemed that was all Rick had to go on as he nodded. Carl walked closer to the circle, Ava and Rick covering him as he handed Judith over to Gabriel. The Priest hushed her as he put her under his sheet, concealing her from the walkers. Ava glanced at Rick, noticing the man shaking. Gently, she put a hand on his arm, hoping to calm him down. This wasn’t the time to overthink strategies, especially when no time existed. He looked down at her and gave a weak nod, as if to say he was okay—or, at least, accepted what had to happen.

“Take Sam.” Jessie’s voice interjected.

The boy was quick to disagree. “No.”

“Yes, Sam, it’ll be safer.”

“I can keep going.” He reassured. “I can keep going. Please.”

Ava glanced between the mother and son, swallowing a groan when Jessie agreed to let him stay. She was proud of Sam for making it this far, but a timid child in the middle of a herd wasn’t a winning combination. At least Ron had been exposed to them at the quarry; this was Sam’s first time. However, being somewhat of a parent of her own, Ava accepted that she couldn’t argue with Jessie’s stance. It was her call.

Once it was decided that Sam was going to stay, Gabriel departed with Judith under his cloak. Ava bit her lip as she watched him disappear into the herd, his steps slow and even. Something in her gut told her that it was all going to work out, that they would see Judith again. Ava turned to Rick, taking in his wide eye and worried expression.

“Hey.” She nudged him, making him turn to her. “He’s going to make it. We all are.”

Rick merely nodded, and Ava took that as a good sign as he invited Sam to take his hand. Jessie followed suit while Carl took hers. Ava looked between Carl and Ron, noticing the Anderson boy’s hesitation to join Carl. Ava rolled her eyes at the pettiness, but got between them anyway. The last thing they needed was teen angst to get in the way.

With a deep breath, they began their slow journey towards the gates. Ava kept her eyes trained on the end goal, allowing her mind to wander back to old memories with Enid. She was doing this for her, wherever she was.

Enid needed a home to come back to.


	20. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Alexandrians earn their town.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> I wanted to get this out before my week becomes truly hectic. I'm finally back at school after being home for the hurricane, and the workload is about to be fierce. Thanks for your patience, and enjoy!

Night had fallen by the time Enid had finished her makeshift rope. She pulled at the banners she tied together, making sure they were sturdy enough for Maggie to shimmy down it. Reluctantly, Glenn agreed to let Enid be the one to climb up the gate to retrieve his wife while he distracted the walkers lingering around the platform. It was risky, but Enid recalled how Ava’s plans always seemed to be daring. What was a plan without a little danger?

She set aside her invention to help Glenn find the guns and ammo. She was starting to think none were in there, and that he had turned to Chapel upside down for nothing. However, when she found a box hidden underneath a pew, Enid wasted no time in grabbing it. Opening it, she grinned widely at the sight of a gun and a box of ammo. She looked up before calling Glenn.

“You were right.”

Glenn turned away from the shelves, letting out an airy laugh as Enid showed off the weapon. He jogged over, and Enid eagerly handed it to him. While he reloaded the pistol, Enid picked up her banners and began walking towards the door.

“Let’s go get Maggie.”

Glenn sighed. “Can’t you just stay here?”

“Nope.”

He rolled his eyes, but Enid could see the glint of amusement within them as he walked with her. As much as he wished it wasn't true, Glenn needed her. The plan would instantly fall flat with only one person. He placed his hand on the large door, shaking his head.

“Ava would kill me if she knew about this.”

Enid glanced over to him, knowing that his words weren't true. Ava knew Enid could handle herself, and just how capable she was during these situations. If anything, Enid figured her sister would be wondering why they didn't go out there sooner. She scoffed.

“Nah. She’d be right here with us.”

And Enid felt Ava’s presence with her the moment they stepped outside the Chapel.

* * *

 

The growls of the dead seemed to grow after the sun disappeared. The sounds vibrated within Ava’s chest, as if they were an echo to her heartbeat. However, she wasn’t frightened. Ava hadn’t been afraid of the dead for a long time—if anything, the noises soothed her. It reminded her that they weren’t them; they may share the same insides, but Ava was alive. And she planned to stay that way.

She glanced behind her, making sure Michonne was still taking up the back of the group. Her eyes darted around her surroundings, and Ava could tell she was a bit more on edge under the cover of dark. Ava liked that; they needed to stay sharp. Ron stared dead-eyed ahead. Ava wasn’t surprised if the glare was for her, but she soon realized that he was looking right through her. It was unnerving.

 “Sam? Come on, sweetheart.”

Jessie’s quiet voice snapped Ava out of her trance, and it was then she realized that the chain of linked hands had stopped moving. Ava looked past Carl to take in the terrified face of Sam Anderson. The boy was frozen in fear as he looked at the scene around him. Ava felt her heart begin to race. She remembered what Enid told her; that the Anderson boys were weak, that they were lucky to be here from the very start. Ava always knew she was right, and as Sam’s face twisted into one filled with tears, Ava realized that he was going to take them all down with him.

“Come with me, Sam.” Jessie begged.

“I…I want to…” His voice broke.

Ava watched, hopeful as he took a small step towards Jessie. The flame of hope was extinguished just as quickly as it was lit when three walkers took a chomp out of Sam’s head, finally reaping the rewards of a moment they were waiting for. Ava sucked in a breath as Jesse let out an inhuman scream, instantly drawing more dead ones towards them. She felt Carl jerk forward in her grip, and Ava instantly tightened her hold on him.

“Jessie,” Ava spoke in a calm tone, trying not to look at Sam getting eaten alive. “Come with us, okay?”

She attempted to pull Jessie and Carl along, but the woman was glued to her spot. It was as if she wasn’t human anymore, and merely a weight to the world. Ava pursed her lips; she knew the grief the mother was feeling, for she had felt it firsthand with her parents and Noah. There was nothing worse than watching someone you cared for die right in front of your eyes, and not being able to do anything about it. However, the time to grieve would come later. They needed to get out of the streets.

Carl followed Ava’s example and whispered reassurances to Jessie, hoping to get her walking once again. Ava could hear Michonne unsheathe her katana, both knowing that the sound of Jessie’s cries was a dinner bell for the dead.

“Jessie, please…”  Rick begged.

It was then two walkers clung onto Jessie, the sudden weight making Carl and Ava lunge forward. Ava steadied herself, holding Carl’s hand as tightly as she could as she attempted to pull him out of Jessie’s grasp. The mother’s grip was already ironclad, and with the combined weight of dead flesh, it was nearly impossible to get him out. Ava looked over at Rick, the usual leader-type now stunned himself as he watched the woman he grew to care for meet her end.

Ava would’ve felt bad for him if his son wasn't about to meet a similar fate.

“Rick,” Ava called in a loud whisper. “Snap out of it.”

Carl’s voice wavered. “Dad…”

He blinked, but still didn’t move. Ava groaned as she continued to pull Carl towards her, her other hand searching frantically for her knife. Maybe her adrenaline would make her swing stronger—only one hit, that’s all they could afford. Just was Ava was about to come down on Jessie’s wrist, a familiar hatchet swung down upon the limb, and the unmistakable sound of Rick’s grunts filled the night air as he chopped. Once the hand was detached, Carl and Ava stumbled backwards, the woman instantly catching Carl against her body to stop them from collapsing to the ground.

Ava’s heart broke when she felt him shake in her arms, his own wrapped around her torso. Carl truly was like Enid. They were strong, but still allowed themselves to feel tiny moments of fear, ideally, in their minds when no one was looking.

“You good?” Ava asked quietly, her hand resting gently on top of his hat.

it was the same question she would ask Enid when she saw her fear. It was a way for Ava to get Enid to still feel strong, even when she felt like crumbling. As if remembering where he was, Carl untangled himself from Ava before giving a quiet nod. Playing it cool.

“How about you?”

Ava gave the same nod as the two moved towards Rick. The man looked to be slightly recovered, if not breathing heavier than normal as he took in the pair walking towards him. He opened his mouth, ready to deliver a new plan, when the click of a bullet entering a gun’s chamber hit their ears. Turning around, Ava’s heart sank as Ron aimed right towards Rick, his eyes dark as he stood, emotionless and ready to kill.

“You.” He whispered harshly.

A blade cut through Ron’s chest. The boy bent backwards, the weapon going off in the sky before falling to his knees as Michonne pulled her weapon out. The woman looked over at the trio, giving a nod of recognition that Ava returned. If she hadn't killed him, someone else would have. Ron wasn't equipped for this world. Ava watched as walkers descended on Ron’s body, and she wondered if she should feel more grief for the Anderson family. They were foolish, but Jessie was kind.

“Dad?”

All thoughts of grief left Ava’s mind when Carl slowly turned towards herself and Rick. Her jaw became unhinged as blood dripped down Carl’s eye socket, the eyeball no longer present. It was gruesome, and Ava nearly dropped to the knees at the sight as Rick let out a choked sob.

“Carl?”

Carl didn’t answer, only falling to the ground with a thud. Rick wasted no time to pick him up as Ava looked towards Michonne.

“Clear a path,” The words fell out of Ava’s mouth. “I’ll take up the back.”

Michonne didn’t need to be told twice as she began hacking walker after walker, panic in her eyes. Ava scooped up Carl's discarded hat before getting behind a weeping Rick, her own knife at the ready. She kicked, slashed, and stabbed the dead away, swallowing her own sobs as they worked their way through the Community. It was in that moment Ava realized that she couldn’t lose Carl. 

She may not have been able to save Enid, but she could save him. She could save Rick and Michonne. Ava would die saving them all.

* * *

 

Enid and Glenn stopped a fair distance away from the platform, her eyes widening at the dire situation. The scaffolding was shaking as the dead clamored at the bottom of it. Maggie braced herself on the rails, and Enid didn’t know if she was hearing her cries or the whimpers of the dead.

“Go get her.” The broken voice didn’t sound like Glenn, and Enid had to look at him to check that it came out of his mouth. “Go get her!”

She nodded and the two separated. While Glenn began shooting to draw them away, Enid went to the part of the gate that wasn’t busted. She acted as if she was climbing to merely go over the wall, that it was another sunny day for her to enjoy. However, the screams of Maggie and the hollers of Glenn broke that illusion. When she stepped onto the railing, Enid looked up at Maggie, the woman yelling for her husband. Enid’s heart broke at the desperation; the scene triggering her own memories of being locked away, and watching her parents through a car window. Enid shook her head. She needed to focus.

“Maggie!”

Maggie reluctantly turned away from Glenn, her heart thumping at the sight of Enid crawling towards her. She was home—Glenn was home. Maggie tried not to celebrate yet, but her inner self smiled at the thought of Ava reuniting with her little sister; if Ava was still down there. She reached and grabbed Enid’s hips, hoisting the young girl over the railing and onto the platform.

Enid knew she should’ve been lowering the banners, but she couldn’t stop staring at Glenn. The man was getting backed into a corner as he shot off rounds like a mad man. She wanted to yell at his lack of planning, but she knew the point was moot.

“Just go!” He called to them. “Get over!”

That was all Enid needed to snap out of her trance. She began to lower the fabric onto the opposite side of the wall, ignoring Maggie’s protests as she screamed for Glenn to run. Enid turned, fearing for how Maggie would react to having to leave, when the sound of machine guns illuminated the air. Enid crawled to Maggie’s side, watching as the dead fell around Glenn’s surprised form.

“Can you get the gate?”

Enid followed the voice to see Abraham and Sasha on the other side of the gate, no doubt standing on a truck as they fired off rounds. The man let out a gleeful chuckle as he continued to fire, Sasha's own lips forming upwards in a smirk. Maggie let out a relived whimper as she held onto Enid, the younger girl letting out a laugh of relief.

For once, everything felt right.

* * *

 

The door to Denise's home opened  the moment they stepped on the porch. The nurse had been watching them, and luckily, was able to somewhat prepare for the arrival of a new patient. Ava was the last one inside, kicking away at a few more of the dead before entering the house and closing the door. She let out a few pants as she put her back to the wooden surface, and it wasn't until she felt a hand on her shoulder when she realized just how many people were inside. Aaron gazed down at her, concern in his eyes as she fought to reclaim the air in her lungs.

“Are you okay?”

Her legs felt like they were going to fail her, but this wasn't the place to complain about such aliments. Especially after she saw Carl resting on the gurney, Denise and a few others rushing around him. Ava could only give Aaron a nod, the gesture good enough for him to go to the gurney when Denise called to him. She pulled off the bed sheet before focusing on the scene in front of her. It reminded her of Enid, and the panic that formed within her chest was the same as that day.

“Ava, light!” Denise called over.

The order snapped Ava out of it. She was quick to push herself off the door and flick the switch on, wanting to do something to help. Spencer groaned.

“That’s going to draw them here.”

Ava glared. “She’s not working in the dark.”

Spencer didn’t answer, only focusing on his job. Ava had to remind herself that he didn’t know about Deanna yet, and she would have to take it easy on him for a while. Ava was about to go over and help when the sound of the door opening made her turn around. Fear and shock rushed through her body when she saw Rick stepping out onto the porch, his hatchet in hand.

“What are you doing?!” Michonne called to him from her spot next to Carl.

 Ava blinked, suddenly feeling more alert than exhausted. “Rick?!”

“Rick!”

It was too late, the man already in his own world as he closed the door behind him. Ava moved to the window, looking past the curtain to see Rick taking on every walker that crossed his path. She knew grief when she saw it, and this was his way of coping with Carl’s condition.

“I need to help him!” Michonne’s panicked voice spoke to Denise. “He’s out there!”

“This is his son.” Denise calmly responded. “Give me a second.”

Ava cringed as she watched Rick body slam a roamer into the ground, the man rolling off it only to hack it in the skull. He didn’t care what happened to him when his son’s condition was unknown. Rick couldn’t survive out there, not alone.

 “He’s taking them all on.” Ava shook her head before turning to the group behind her.  “We have to go.”

Spencer’s brows furrowed. “What?”

“We have to.” Heath agreed. “This is it.”

Ava unsheathed her knife before looking around the room. Aaron and Heath looked to her, and she nodded. It wasn’t much, but it was better than Rick being alone. He needed numbers. Ava turned to the gurney, watching as Denise finished the stitches.

“Michonne?”

The woman nodded at Ava before turning to Denise. "Please..."

Denise nodded. “Okay, got it.”

With a kiss on the head, Michonne ran towards the door. Aaron opened it, allowing everyone to file out. Ava ran until she reached Rick, her blade instantly entering a roamer that was getting a bit too close to him. As the blood soaked her shirt, Rick looked over to Ava, his eyes slightly widening at the sight of the rest of the group joining him. The small group formed a circle, making it easy to take out the walkers from all sides. As Ava took out another dead one, she noticed Olivia and Eric sprint out of a house as well as a few more residents jogging towards them.

“Drive ‘em back!” Rick called over the growls. “We can do this together!”

Ava couldn’t hide the grin that formed on her face as she kicked another walker away, Tobin finishing the job as he stabbed it in the head. They were coming to fight, ready to defend the home they created. For once, Alexandria had a chance.

* * *

 

The herd was thinning. Enid could see it through the windshield of the diesel truck. Daryl had come up with a plan to light the lake up, to draw the stragglers away to burn. As she watched the fire dance upon the water, something awoken within Enid. Ava could be down there, but even if she wasn't, Enid couldn't let the place her older sister learned to love to die at the hands of the dead.

“We have to help!”

Maggie and Glenn watched as Enid jumped out of the truck, the rest of the group following close behind as they began to defend their home.

* * *

 

Ava could feel the heat of fire on her back, but she didn’t pay it any mind as she continued to slash and stomp at the dead. Tara was now at her side, the entire community in the streets as they worked to save their home. She hadn't expected the night to end up like this, to have everyone outside working as one. Rick was wrong. It wasn't too late to teach them. They wanted to learn. Adrenaline pumped through Ava’s veins, the feeling stronger as she watched the dead get drawn in by the flames.

“Don’t let up!” Rick yelled.

And they didn’t. They fought until there was nothing to fight anymore.

Soon enough, an eerie calm took over Alexandria, the only sound being the crackling fire in the lake as the dead burned. Ava looked around the streets, taking in the sight of more than thousands of walkers littering the streets. Her gaze took in the residents of Alexandria. The people whom Ava once saw as nothing more than liability were the reason they had a home tonight.

They earned Alexandria. Ava earned the safety of her home. The feeling of joy that bubbled up in Ava’s stomach soon made itself known through the sound of laughter. The emotion was clearly contagious as Tara joined in. The pair held onto one another as the joy continued to erupt through them. Looking around, Ava could see that everyone else was beginning to smile; peace, it was a feeling of peace.

“Ava.”

Ava stopped laughing, wanting silence to make sure the familiar voice she just heard wasn’t a trick. Following the sound, Ava was greeted by Enid’s brown eyes staring up at her. Brown eyes Ava never thought she would see again. The orbs filled with tears, and Ava felt herself begin to shake as she dropped her hand from Tara’s shoulder. Enid was in one piece, and standing right in front of her.

The ache in her muscles faded as Ava took off in a run towards Enid, the younger sister doing the same. Enid jumped into Ava’s arms, the sudden contact making them both fall to the ground with a thud. They didn’t care about that, or the fact that the dead surrounded them. All that mattered to Ava was the girl clinging to her shirt. She was here, she came _back_. A joyful sob escaped Ava’s throat—it was the only sound she could produce, and it made Enid cling even tighter to her.

 “I’m sorry.” Enid’s tears mixed with the blood on Ava’s grey shirt. “I’m _so_ sorry.”

Her voice was small, the words genuine. Just hearing the familiar tone made Ava hold onto her tighter.

“You’re here now.” Ava whispered into Enid's hair. “That’s all that matters.”

She closed her eyes, letting her lips feel the locks as she planted multiple kisses on top of her head.  Ava could feel the gaze of onlookers, the smiles radiating their way as the community watched the reunion. However, when she opened her eyes, Ava only looked at two people. Glenn and Maggie stood a fair distance away from the siblings, Maggie’s own eyes glistening with tears as Glenn held her close. Just looking at Glenn’s tattered appearance, Ava knew he was the one who brought Enid home.

Nothing would be enough to show her gratitude. All she could do for now was mouth a ‘thank you’, which Glenn responded with a nod. Ava closed her eyes again as she started gently rocking Enid, allowing the scene around them to fade as dawn broke over the horizon. 

* * *

 

After a quick checkup from Denise, Ava and Enid dragged themselves home. They were quiet, but Ava noticed how Enid held her hand the entire walk home. It was a gesture that used to embarrass the young girl, even after the world grew quiet and no one was around to see it. Enid just wanted to feel close to Ava, and the older girl didn't mind. It was a way for Ava to know that this was real, that she was actually taking Enid back to the house they could now call home.

 

"Is he going to be okay?"

It was after their respected showers when the questions started. The sisters lounged on the couch, both too pumped up from the night's events to even think about sleeping. Ava sighed, knowing after she told Enid about Carl that she would be worried, but she couldn't lie to her. It was the lies that chased her sister away, after all. They hadn't been able to see Carl, but Ava did catch a glimpse of Rick at his son's bedside. He didn't look defeated, but ready. As if eager for the future. Ava took it as a good sign.

"Denise knows what she's doing." Ava  did her best to reassure. "Poor kid isn't going to be able to see correctly again."

Enid let out a shaky sigh. "And Ron did that?"

"He...won't be a problem anymore."

Ava looked down at her sister, wanting to gauge her reaction. Enid didn't seem that upset over the death of the Andersons. Like Ava, Enid figured they had it coming--especially Ron. Enid was more concerned about Carl, the boy who was able to relate to her in a way Ava never could. The pair grew silent, just enjoying the other's company. However, Ava couldn't move on until she knew the answer to one question.

"Why'd you leave?"

Enid began to fidget, wishing they didn't have to talk about this. It was unrealistic to think that they could just fall back into their routine, but that didn't stop Enid from sighing.

"I thought Alexandria was too big to protect, but after tonight, I'm not so sure anymore." A small smile took over her face before quickly disappearing. "And I couldn't stand losing you, I still can't."

Ava frowned. She knew Enid didn't believe in Alexandria in the beginning of it all. but hearing about her fear of losing her sister worried Ava immensely. She wouldn't be around forever. When that day did come, Ava didn't want her sister to crumble. To abandon the life she would hopefully create behind the walls.

"Enid, that's going to happen." She felt Enid tense underneath her arm. "Hopefully, a long time from now. But you can't run away from that, you can't let your fear control you like that."

"I know that now." Enid nodded. "I know that, but I don't _like_ it."

Ava let out a small laugh. "I'll do my best to live forever, then."

"You better."

The pair talked until the sun rose high in the sky, signaling the afternoon. It was then they fell asleep, Ava holding Enid in her arms as the girls had the best sleep either have had in weeks. 

 


	21. (Almost) Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava tries to be a friend while Enid comes to terms with a choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BAAAAAAACK.  
> Seriously though, sorry for the long wait. The semester has been nuts, and my work schedule is just as crazy. I also had a big case of writer's block, but season 8 of twd has been a big motivator! 
> 
> Trust me when I say you'll no longer have to wait almost two months for another update. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy!

It occurred to Ava one morning, about two months after they took back Alexandria, that she wasn’t just surviving anymore—she was living. No longer did the walls of the community suffocate her, or did she hear the scratching of the dead eager to get in. Threats were still out there, but with the community willing to become better, and with Rick as their guide to do so, Ava knew they could handle anything. 

It felt natural to wake up in a bed, and to get more than an hour of sleep. Sometimes, Ava would lay tangled in the sheets, bathing in the morning light as she thought about her new life. A life she would have never thought possible only a few months ago.

She thought about Enid, and how easily they fell back into their relationship. It was better, open. Ava never wanted Enid to run away from her again, and she made sure Enid knew she could tell her older sister anything without the fear of judgement—or punishment. Enid was still far from an open book, but she was taking strides in the right direction. Ava made sure to take her own advice and kept her cards on the table when it came time to speak to Enid at the end of the day.

Well, most of them. Ava still had a long way to go until she was an open book as well.

After taking a quick shower and getting dressed, Ava descended the stairs. An intoxicating scent hit her nostrils with each step down, and it wasn’t until the kitchen was in her view when she saw the source of the smell. Ava has seen a lot of crazy shit in her day, but watching Enid hustle around the kitchen as bacon sizzled and eggs cooked was a sight she wasn’t prepared for.

“Holy shit.”

Enid popped her head out of the fridge, a small smirk on her lips as she held their ration of milk in her hands.

“Well, good morning to you, too.”

Ava blinked. “What is this?”

“I said I was going to make breakfast.” Enid gestured to the stove. “This is me making breakfast.”

“I was expecting cereal, or just bread.” Ava examined the eggs. “Where did you learn how to cook?”

Their parents weren’t exactly chefs. Ava learned her own cooking ‘skills’ from college roommates and YouTube tutorials. She had planned on teaching Enid a few tips, but that time never came thanks to the dead rising. Enid smiled sheepishly as she dished out an egg and two strips of bacon to Ava, the older girl taking it with a grin before heading to the table.

“Maggie taught me while you were on that run with Tara the other day.” Enid beamed. “Eat up!”

Enid’s excitement made Ava even more eager to shovel her food down. She was relieved when it tasted just as good as it looked. As she watched Enid eat her own meal, Ava couldn’t help but think about the community. The people who were quickly becoming their family.

Becoming friends with Maggie and Glenn came quickly. It was hard not to after everything they have been through; not only did Glenn bring Enid back home, but Ava was the first-person Maggie relieved her pregnancy to—outside of her husband, of course. Ava wasn’t used to such an emotional connection between strangers, but watching Enid light up each time the couple came to visit was enough to make her feel just as thrilled to see them. 

_“Thank you.” Ava spoke after dinner one night as Glenn helped her with the dishes. “For bring her home.”_

_Glenn grinned. “She saved me too.”_

_Ava followed his gaze out to the porch where Maggie and Enid were sitting on the swing, chatting to themselves. She would never forget the warmth she felt when she saw Enid laugh._

After a few moments of light conversation, a knock sounded on the door. Ava gave Enid a knowing look as the youngest sprang up from her seat and made her way to the living area. She didn’t even need to look up to know who was making their way into the kitchen. It was the same boy who had been making an appearance each day since his recovery.  

“I thought it was Enid’s turn to make breakfast.”

Ava choked on her water at Carl’s words while Enid gave the boy a punch to the arm. Ava couldn’t help but smile as he grinned over at Enid, rubbing his arm before adjusting the bandage over his right eye. She hated that Ron’s cowardice was what brought the ailment to him, but there was nothing they could do about it now. All they could do was thank Denise, and move on.

“That didn’t hurt.” He teased.

Enid scoffed. “One day, it will.” She took the strap of her backpack off the chair, swinging it over her shoulder. “Carl and I are going to hang out.”

“What else is new?” Ava grinned.

The eldest in the room gave a small laugh as the two teens gave a sheepish look—well, Carl’s cheeks had a soft blush while Enid glared at her sister. Ava couldn’t help it. Enid and Carl have been attached to the hip since he was discharged from Denise’s care. Both Ava and Rick were a little too pleased by the friendship; it was nice to see their loved one connecting with a person close to their age. The newfound connection made the adults of the teens grow closer as well; Rick had invited the sisters over for dinner more times than Ava could count.

_“You can’t force these things.” Michonne had stated as she passed Ava the bottle of wine._

_“We’re not forcing this.” Ava defended as she filled her glass. “It’s more of a push--.”_

_“Nudge.” Rick corrected, making Michonne scoff._

_Ava pointed at him. “A nudge in the right direction.”_

_“Ah, I see.” Michonne mocked. “You nudged them to hang out upstairs.”_

_Rick grinned. “Exactly.”_

 “Don’t go too far,” Ava warned before nodding to the empty plate. “And clean up your plate before you go.”

Enid groaned, but didn’t argue as she scooped her empty plate up and made her way to the sink. Ava grinned—any moment Enid acted like a regular teenager, even one filled with angst, warmed her heart. She never thought they would be able to complain about trivial things, like doing the dishes, again.

“I’ll be home by sunset.” Enid informed.

“I have watch duty, but I’ll be home to make dinner.” Ava smiled over to Carl. “You and Judith are welcome to join us. I know your dad and Daryl are going on that run.”

Carl nodded, grinning. “Sounds good.”           

With one last goodbye, Ava watched as the pair made their way to the door. Ava knew they spent their days outside the wall, taking in the forest air as they ran among the wild. However, she wasn’t about to confront Enid about it. The girl could handle herself—and Carl wasn’t helpless either.

Ava understood their need to be out there, she just didn’t feel it as much anymore. She still went out on runs with whomever asked, but Ava found that those few hours every few days were enough to satisfy her hunger. These days, Ava was eager to just be home with Enid, the two spending their time together. It almost felt like old times.

Seeing that she was content with being behind the wall, Rick had Ava switch between taking watch and training the residents for combat—something she enjoyed doing with Tara and Rosita.  Realizing that it was time for her to relieve the night guard, Ava put the plates in the sink and made her way out the door.

The morning sun warmed her skin the moment she stepped out onto the porch. It was a brand-new day, and for the first time in a while, Ava was eager to see what it held as she descended the steps. The community was relatively quiet, the hour still a bit too early for most people. Ava didn’t mind; she liked having the time to think. She waved at Denise noticing that the Doctor looked a bit downtrodden—and it was only when Ava saw who she was walking away from when she realized why.

“You played nice, right?”

At the sound of her voice, Daryl paused and turned around. Her relationship with the redneck was complicated. Ava always tried to start a conversation and, for the most part, Daryl would respond. If she was lucky, Ava would get a complete sentence out of him. She was more than a little surprised when he showed up to her house for a small get together; he stayed close to Rick and Carol for most of the night, but did stay behind to help Ava clean up. Although he was silent for most of the time, except for answering a few questions and asking some of his own, Ava liked having him around.

“’m always nice.” He muttered when Ava got close enough to hear him.

“Mr. Sunshine, right.” She grinned before gesturing to the list in his hands. “What’s on the agenda?”

Daryl glanced down. “Food, medicine…’pop’.”

“Pop?”

“Soda.” Daryl explained. “Denise wants it for Tara.”

Ava couldn’t help but smile. In the past months, Tara and Denise’s relationship had blossomed into something beautiful. It took Tara a week to move into Denise’s house, but before doing so, the girl had asked Ava for some advice.

_“Dude, I’m not the right person to ask.” Ava had explained as they walked through an abandoned strip mall. “My relationships never lasted long enough for me to celebrate a birthday.”_

_“And I’ve ruined all of mine by going too fast.” Tara sighed. “I don’t want to freak her out.”_

_Ava raised a brow. “In this world, there’s no such thing as going ‘too fast’.”_

“You got any requests?”

Daryl’s question brought Ava back to reality. The man stared at her with curious eyes, as if wondering why Ava would want to stop him in the middle of the street. Daryl liked Ava—she was one of the first people he trusted outside of his group, and Rick had said that she was a good friend. Daryl just didn’t know if he needed that in his life—someone to get close to, only to lose them. However, as he watched her cross her arms over her chest with a teasing smirk, he began to think that getting close wouldn’t be so bad.

“A movie.”

Daryl furrowed his brow. “What?”

“We have a DVD player but no DVDs.” Ava pointed out with a shrug. “Enid’s been hinting that movies aren’t the number one priority right now, so there’s bound to be some out there.”

Enid has also been hinting to Ava that she wants nothing more than to cuddle up with a good flick—just like the old days. Whenever Ava went out with Tara or Glenn, she always made sure to check for the discs, but always came up empty. It was such a small request, and Enid was never one to ask for much. All Ava wanted was for her to get all she could in this world—and if that meant having to sit through a horrible film, Ava would do it.

Daryl let out a huff of breath. From the interactions between Ava and Enid he had been able to watch, that seemed plausible. Plus, Ava was never one to demand personal items on a run; she always focused on the community at large, and Enid, before even thinking of herself. Daryl nodded before beginning his trek back towards the front gate. Ava pursed her lips as a thought hit her mind.

“Hey,” Her call made Daryl turn. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

The man took in her features. Even from a distance, Daryl could see the worried expression emitting from her face. He gave a mock salute.

“Yes ma’am.”

Ava offered a soft smile, and was more than a little surprised when Daryl returned it before heading to the waiting car. Ava knew she didn’t have to worry about Daryl—or Rick—when they went outside the walls. They were experienced, knew how to conquer the world. Like Ava and Enid, they had been lucky.

She just worried when that luck would run out.

* * *

 

The late morning sun shone through the leaves, bathing Enid in warmth as she followed Carl through the underbrush. Her fingers clenched onto the damp kite in her hands; proof that someone was out here, and that they needed help. Months ago, Enid would’ve discarded the evidence without a second thought—people meant danger, especially those who have been outside for too long. However, today she found herself longing to find the owner, to see a new face. She liked the idea of not being alone.

Which was why going over the wall everyday was starting to lose its’ appeal.

“Why are we coming out here?”

She didn’t realize that she spoke the words aloud until she heard Carl let out a small huff of air. Unlike Enid, Carl was always adamant about disappearing into the wilderness. Even when Enid hinted that she wouldn’t mind spending the day in Alexandria’s gazebo, Carl always found an excuse to go over the wall. In the beginning, Enid didn’t mind it—she needed to feel the fresh air just as much as him. Now, all she wanted was to hang out with Ava while she did watch or keep a pregnant Maggie company.

“We’re kids.” Carl answered, never letting up on his speed. “It’s what we do.”

Carl’s mocking tone made Enid sigh. She understood that he was merely echoing what the rest of the community thought of their escapade, but all she could think about were Glenn’s words to her. It had been months since Enid returned home with the man, but the wisdom he shared still rang in her brain each time she scaled the wall.

It was time to grow up, to be there for Ava the way her older sister was always there for her. She finally felt ready to accept the responsibility that came with being a part of a community—hell, Enid was ready to be a member of a community.

All she had to do was tell Carl—a task Enid knew was easier said than done.

* * *

 

Although Ava knew it was immature to play favorites, she couldn’t deny that she enjoyed gate duty the most when she was paired with Michonne. The woman had a sense of humor that Ava didn’t expect, but instantly welcomed and did her best to match on the slow days. As much as Ava loved the laughter, she appreciated the silence just as much. She and Michonne could stand slightly for a prolonged period, and it never felt awkward to Ava.

It was on one of the quiet moments when Michonne spotted him.

“Is that Spencer?”

Ava peered through the scope of the rifle, brows furrowing as she watched Spencer Monroe disappear into the woods, shovel strapped to his back. She pursed her lips as she lowered the weapon. Ava felt guilty for the way she treated the Monroe; despite their last meeting ending in malice, avoiding him for two months wasn’t exactly of course of action she was proud of.

“I’ll check it out.” Michonne spoke as she secured her sword to her back.

“No,” Ava sighed. “I’ll go.”

Michonne turned to her with a raised brow. Unfortunately, like most of Alexandria, she knew all about the strained relationship between the young adults. The last thing she wanted was to put Ava in an uncomfortable position she didn’t need to be in the first place. However, the girl seemed adamant in her stance as she passed the rifle to Michonne’s waiting hands.

“You sure about this?” Michonne asked one last time.

“Positive.” Ava reassured as she positioned her bow and quiver. “It should be me.”

 Ava kept repeating that to herself as she walked through the gates of Alexandria and back into the world. She was one of the last people to see Deanna alive, and with the history they shared, Ava owed it to Spencer—and herself—to gain closure. She didn’t have to walk far into the woods before finding the man, his form unmoving as he watched a roamer approach him. Ava stayed back, waiting for him to make a move. When one never came, Ava quickly prepped an arrow into her bow and raised it.

“Scoot over.” She warned.

Spencer turned around, taking in Ava’s stance before quickly moving to the side. Ava let the arrow whiz through the air, implanting itself into the forehead of the walker. She could feel Spencer’s eyes on her as she walked to the dead one, pulling her arrow out of its head with a grunt.

“You think I couldn’t get it?” He asked, his tone laced with annoyance.

Ava swallowed the need to make a snappy comeback—an urge that was always strong when she was in the same space as Spencer. Instead, she merely nodded.

“You could’ve.” Ava reassured before holding up her bow. “It’s just been a while since I used this in the field. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t getting rusty.”

She smiled, hoping to lighten the mood. However, Spencer’s features seemed to be in a permanant frown as he scanned Ava’s form.

“What do you want, Ava?” He spat.

Ava rolled her eyes. If Spencer wanted to get to the point, who was Ava to stop him?

“What are you doing out here?”

“If you must know, I walk after my shifts.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “You’re the first one to notice.”

She bit her lip. “Actually, Michonne noticed.”

“Well, that makes me feel better.” Spencer mocked. “I’m going to keep walking now. Don’t wait up.”

Ava watched as Spencer began his trek further into the woods. She didn’t miss the clanging of the shovel on his back—or why he even had the tool. She closed her eyes and sighed, realizing it was something she needed to find out.

“I’m going with you.”

 Spencer kept walking. “I can’t think of anything I want less, but thanks.”

Ava couldn’t say she didn’t deserve that, but she wasn’t about to take the blame for everything that went wrong between them—or in Spencer’s life. He needed to own up to it, and maybe that’s what he was doing in the woods today. Whatever his plan was, Ava was going to find out.

“Your mom asked me what I wanted in life.”

She blurted the sentence out before she could stop herself, but it was the right thing to say as Spencer paused in his strides.

“Do you know?” He asked, turning to face her.

Ava let out a sigh. She was happy with her life behind the walls; she was thrilled to be surrounded by people she truly loved. It was what she wanted, and now that she had it, a small part of Ava still felt incomplete. She wondered what else was out there, what Deanna wanted Ava to find for herself.

“I’m taking it day-by-day.” Ava answered. “Today, I want to find out why you’re wandering around the woods with a shovel strapped to your back.”

When Ava turned to face him, she was more than a little surprised to spot a ghost of a smile on Spencer’s features. It was the kindest expression she had received from him in a long time. He didn’t speak as he turned to keep walking, Ava accepting the silent approval as she followed.

* * *

 

Enid tried to read the comic book Carl passed to her, but she couldn’t get into it. All she could do was fiddle with the kite in her hands, and wonder who was the unfortunate soul to lose it. Maybe they wanted it to be found, maybe they wanted to find a place like Alexandria. Enid wished there was a way to help them, but she knew it was a lost cause.

Sighing, she passed the bag of nuts to Carl, the boy taking an almond without looking up from his pages. Enid let her gaze linger on him. He seemed content to come out here every day, as if afraid to break the routine. Enid once felt the same, but now she just felt like it was a waste. She opened her mouth, ready to tell Carl that she didn’t need to come out here when the sound of leaves rustling made the pair freeze.

Not in the mood to deal with a walker, Enid got to her feet. “Come on.”

She began to walk away, but paused when she noticed Carl still on the ground. He remained crouched as he pulled his pistol from his back pocket. She rolled her eyes; he was always looking for fight. Enid liked spending time with Carl, but the more time spent, the more she realized just how cocky he was.

“It was just Spencer and Ava.” His posture relaxed.

Her sister’s name made Enid’s brow furrow in confusion. From her spot, she could see a flash of Ava’s brown jacket. Ava was supposed to be on guard, what was she doing out here? Hell, what was she doing with Spencer? Enid hoped they weren’t rekindling…whatever they were. Ava deserved better, and Spencer was far from ready to be with anyone.

“What were they doing?” She asked, stepping forward.

 “Walking.” Carl shrugged as he sat on the ground. “They weren’t making out or anything, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Enid didn’t dignify the statement with a response, instead, she fiddled with the kite in her hand as Carl went back to reading. Seeing Ava was only a reminder that Enid rather be with her than out here; she’d rather spend time with the friends they made and the family they formed behind the safety of the wall.

“I don’t want to come out here anymore.” Enid slowly announced.

She kept her eyes on Carl’s back, watching as he seemed to deflate at her words. Enid pursed her lips, bracing herself for Carl’s wrath. Their friendship was built on their shared desire to be beyond the walls, and Enid didn’t want it to fall apart just because she didn’t want to be out here. He took a deep breath.

“Okay.” He answered a bit too calmly. “Go home.”

Enid began to walk, but paused. "You coming?"

"Why would I?"

Enid blinked, watching him silently as Carl went back to reading. When she realized the conversation was over, all Enid could do was shake her head and make her way back to Alexandria. Despite it going better than expect, a knot formed in her stomach. Yelling would’ve felt better.

* * *

 

“Why are you still here?”

“Ten.”

Spencer’s exasperated expression faded into confusion as he looked behind him. Ava kept with his pace, but her eyes were glued to the digital watch resting on her wrist.  When she looked up at him, Spencer could only offer a blank stare.

“What?”

“It took you ten minutes to talk to me.” Ava explained with a small grin as she held up her wrist. “Stole Tara’s watch.”

Well, more accurately, Tara let her borrow the accessory when Ava and Aaron went hunting a week ago. Ava just conveniently forgot to give it back—she made a mental note to do so when they returned to Alexandria. Spencer let out a huff of air before focusing on the path ahead. Ava wasn’t surprised about the silence between them; even if they were on good terms, they never had much in common besides a physical attraction.

Ava peeked at her watch again, noticing the late hour. The sun would be setting soon, and Ava wasn’t about to fight off roamers in the dark if she didn’t need to. Whatever Spencer was searching for, Ava hoped it could wait for another day. She cleared her throat.

“It’s going to get dark.” Ava’s tone was light. “Let’s head home--.”

“My family’s dead, that’s not home.” Spencer interjected. “It’s just where I live.”

Ava frowned. She couldn’t deny that Spencer was right; home wasn’t a place, it was the people you surrounded yourself with. However, Alexandria held a piece of his family that would never go away. They were the reason the community existed, after all.

“It’s more than that.” Ava defended. “Your Mom turned Alexandria into a home.”

“That’s enough.”

It was those words that made Spencer stop suddenly, quickly turning around to face Ava. She stopped a fair distance away, almost tripping over her feet. She pursed her lips. Maybe she did step over the line, but it was something he needed to hear. However, judging from the anger emitting from his body, Ava could tell he didn’t like it.

“I don’t need you to remind me about my family’s accomplishments.” He took a deep breath. “You got a life back there, and maybe I will too, but before I can think about that…I need to do this.”

Ava blinked, wishing she understood what brought Spencer out to the woods every day. She wished she took the time to notice his grief, and maybe help him through it. Spencer’s gaze flicked to his shoes, the toe of his boots crunching a leaf. She stepped forward.

“Whatever it is, I can help you.” Ava frowned. “Let me help you.”

Spencer shook his head. “You can’t.”

Ava was about to ask him to elaborate when the sound of rustling leaves made her quickly whip out an arrow. Spencer stepped back as she brought the string of her bow back, aiming the arrow in the distance. Her eyes scanned the forest until they landed on a tuff of black hair beneath a cowboy hat.

“Carl.” She breathed, lowering the weapon.

The boy ran through the woods, looking behind him momentarily before focusing on his path back towards Alexandria. She waited for Enid to follow, but when she didn’t catch a glimpse of her, Ava’s heart began to pound. The teens were supposed to stick together, and Carl’s urgent pace home wasn’t helping the scenarios Ava began to construct in her mind.

She was in the middle of reassuring herself that Enid was more than capable to handle the outside world when the growls of a walker tore Ava from her thoughts. She was about to raise her weapon to take the dead one out quickly, but paused when the being got closer.

It was Deanna—or what was left of her.

“I thought I saw her that night.” Spencer spoke in awe.

Ava watched as he unsheathed his knife, his eyes never straying from his mother. It all made sense now; he wanted to give his mom peace—and it was only right that he was the one to do it. As Deanna walked closer, Ava made her way behind the woman. She pinned her arms to her sides, trying to restrain the wild beast to give Spencer an easier target. Ava could see the tears in Spencer’s eyes as he walked forward and finished the job, implanting the blade on the backside of her skull. Her snarls faded into silence, and Ava let go of her, allowing Spencer to hold his mother one last time.

He took in her features before looking up at Ava, the girl looking at him with sympathy.

“She left me a note—she said that I still knew my way.” He gave a sad chuckle. “I never knew my way.”

“You loved your family?” Ava asked, and he nodded. “Then you know your way; it’s home.”

He looked back down at his mom. “They’re gone, Ava.”

“That doesn’t mean you stop trying.” Ava put a hand on his shoulder. “You still got people who need you.”

Spencer looked up at Ava, noticing the small smile playing on her lips. Whether he liked it or not, Ava and the rest of Alexandria was his family. She wouldn't have been chasing him through the woods if she wasn’t. He mirrored the smile, and Ava patted him on the shoulder before looking down at Deanna. He may have given her peace, but they weren’t done yet.

“I know a good spot.”

* * *

 

The burial was quick and quiet; while Spencer dug, Ava cared Deanna’s initials on the tree rooted near her grave site. The pair didn’t exchange words as they walked back to Alexandria, the moon high in the sky when they went their separate ways with only a nod to recognize a farewell. Ava wasn’t a fool; she and Spencer were far from having a friendship, but for the first time in a long awhile, she finally felt that they were on the right path.

As Ava made her way back to the house, relief coursed through her veins when she saw that the lights were on. Enid. She jogged up the porch steps, and opened the front door to see the young girl in the kitchen. She looked up from the dish she was cleaning, a small smile on her face as she watched Ava walk into the living room.

“’I’ll be home to make dinner’, huh?” Enid teased.

“Yeah, sorry about that.” Ava gave a sheepish grin. “Something came up.”

“Michonne told me.” Enid nodded. “I went over to Maggie and Glenn’s for dinner—we saved you a piece of roast if you want it.”

Enid watched as Ava merely nodded and shed herself of her weaponry. Michonne didn’t go into details into how they ended up together, but Enid knew that Ava was with Spencer for most of the day. Enid wondered what kind of head space her older sister was in as she sat at the kitchen table and began to eat. Did she miss Spencer? Enid hoped not, but if he made Ava happy, she guessed she would have to deal with it.

“How was Spencer?” Enid took the plunge.

“He’s feeling lost, but I think he’ll be okay.” Ava turned a piece of meat on her fork. “How was your day? Did you have fun with Carl?”

Ava did her best not to hint at the fact that she saw that the two had separated, but she did notice the way Enid seemed to pause at the question. It was all Ava needed to know that she wasn’t reading too much into what she saw today. After a moment, Enid went back to the counter, wiping down any mess left over.

“It was okay.” Enid shrugged. “We weren’t out there for too long.”

“Really?” Ava asked, gently putting down her folk. “Because I saw Carl out there. Without you.”

The younger girl stopped in her task and sighed. Ava simply shook her head; she hated when she had to put her ‘mom-lecture’ tone on, but Enid needed to know that this was unacceptable.

“Look, I don’t care that you go out there.” Ava turned in her chair to face Enid. “But all that I ask is that you two stay together. It’s not a game out there.”

“I know it’s not.” She interjected as she leaned on the counter. “And I wasn’t with Carl because I was already back here.”

Ava’s anger faded into curiosity. She raised her brows, digesting what Enid just told her. She was never one to come back to Alexandria early; Enid was always home a little after sunset. Ava stood up from her seat.

“Did something happen?” Ava asked as Enid looked down. The older girl stepped forward, her tone gentle. “Enid, talk to me.”

 It was a phrase Ava found herself saying more often. Enid opened to her, but sometimes it took a little push. After taking a breath, Enid met Ava’s gaze.

“I don’t want to go out there anymore.”

Enid watched Ava’s reaction; the way her eyes slightly widened at the words. Ava didn’t know what to expect, but it certainly wasn’t that. Enid, the girl who practically begged Ava to leave Alexandria, now wanted to be in it.

“Why?”

“I want to help the community.” Enid ran a hand up her arm. “I see what this place can be now, and I want to get it there.”

Ava couldn’t hide her grin. All she wanted was for Enid to like Alexandria, and now she wanted to help it thrive. Ava liked to think that she helped Enid see the light, but she knew it wasn’t all her; Enid admired Maggie, and listening to the woman’s plans for the community would make anyone excited. Ava nodded.

“You know, I’m actually training a few of the teens tomorrow.” Ava began.  “I could use your help to show them just how good they can be one day.”

Enid beamed, and the smile on her face made Ava’s heart soar. All Enid wanted was to spend more time with her sister, and it was clear that Ava felt the same. The younger girl nodded.

“I’d like that.”

Ava didn’t say a word as she walked over and pulled Enid into a hug. She ignored the annoyed sigh from Enid.

“Okay, that’s enough mushiness for the night.” Enid began to wiggle.

“Sorry, kid.” Ava giggled as she let her sister go. “I’m just...proud of you.”

And Ava was. Enid made the choice on her own to begin living in Alexandria—she didn’t need Ava to drag her back behind the wall, she walked through the gates herself. Enid smiled.

“I’m proud of you, too.” Enid agreed. “Things are going well.”

The end of the statement came out like a question, and Ava knew why. Neither of the girls were used to life being this peaceful—especially in today’s world. For once, things were calm, and Ava was ready to enjoy every moment of the bliss with Enid by her side.

“Yeah,” Ava smiled. “Things are great.”

* * *

 

As always, Enid passed out the moment she hit the pillow, leaving Ava with alone time she didn’t ask for. Usually, Ava liked the silence after a busy day; it was the only time she could be with her thoughts. However, after sharing most of the afternoon with Spencer and his dilemma, Ava wished she was as tired as Enid.

Instead, she sat curled on the couch, staring blankly at the pages of a book she didn’t even know the title of. Ava thought of her parents, and how she wished Spencer knew how lucky he was to be able to give his family a burial. Ava thought about how she wasn’t there when her family needed her the most; she wondered how much longer they would’ve last. Her mom would’ve loved Alexandria, and she could see her dad connecting with the people in a way Ava knew she never could. Ava closed her eyes. She had to remind herself not to think of what could’ve been—that’s how you lose focus.

A knock on the door brought her out of the dangerous thoughts. Putting the book on the coffee table, Ava made her way to the door and peeked through the curtain. Although she was happy to see the man on the porch, Ava couldn’t help but feel a pang of confusion in her mind. What could he want at midnight? Ava figured there was only one way to find out as she flicked on the porch light before opening the door.

“Daryl.” She grinned. “Uh…good evening.”

Good evening? God, Ava hated herself sometimes. Luckily, Daryl ignored the comment as he nodded in greeting. His eyes than scanned her form, taking in her oversized hoodie and gym shorts.

“You weren’t sleepin’, were you?” He asked, suddenly nervous. “’Cause I could come back.”

“No, you’re good.” She quickly interjected, her eyes narrowing when she noticed that he was holding something behind his back. “What’s up?”

 Without saying a word, Daryl revealed his hands, his fingers clutching onto a DVD box. Ava’s eyes went wide, remembering their conversation earlier in the morning; he found a movie for Enid, he didn’t brush off Ava’s request as just another silly comment she made to him. Ava felt her heart warm even more when she read the title of the movie.

“You brought me _Finding Nemo_?” Her tone was light, words laced with amazement.

“It was either this or some foreign film.” He grumbled. “The gas station didn’t offer much.”

Daryl was surprised they offered anything, but the store had a ‘Clearance Bin’ that was practically empty. Rick noted that looters most likely cleaned it out before the world got dire, but Daryl didn’t care. All he could think about was Ava’s face when he presented the movie, and he wasn’t disappointed as her lips formed into a soft smile. Daryl decided he liked being the one who made her happy.

He passed the DVD to her, and Ava turned the box in her hands. A laugh escaped her lips.

“Enid’s going to flip out.”  She beamed. “And, not gonna lie, I’m pretty pumped too. This is one of my favorites.”

 “I’ve never seen it.”

Ava’s gaze grew hard as she looked at Daryl, the man finding himself mirroring the look in pure defense. She blinked, ready to ask him how he could miss such a classic, but Ava stopped herself. Carol had hinted to her that Daryl didn’t live the easiest life before everything went down, a life that most certainly wouldn’t include going to the movies with one’s family. The last thing Ava wanted to do was bring up awful memories. Instead, she had a better idea.

“You busy?” Ava asked suddenly.

Daryl shook his head, and that was all it took for Ava to open the door wider. However, when Daryl didn’t walk in, Ava sighed.

“Look, I can’t let you go another day without seeing this movie.” Ava explained. “I’d be doing you a huge disservice.”

“Oh?”

She nodded. “And it’ll be fun.”

Daryl looked back out into the night. He expected to drop off the movie and make his way back to the cell—he never even thought that Ava would invite him to watch it. He couldn’t deny the temptation he felt to spend time with Ava—he liked being around her. Daryl never felt like he had to change around Ava—she wasn’t put off by his silence, or his other habits. He could be himself, and after the day he had, Daryl felt like he deserved that.

He licked his lips, thinking of the man back in the cell. After the hit he took to his head, he was sure the guy wouldn’t be waking up anytime soon. Daryl would just head back there after the movie was done. It was a kid’s movie, how long could it be?

“Alright.”

Ava grinned as Daryl entered the house, closing the door behind him as he watched Ava make her way to the living room. She noticed the way he lingered as she fiddled with the DVD Player; he didn’t take a seat, or even walk around. Daryl kept his feet planted on the wood, his eyes scanning over every inch of the wall. He was always observing, assessing a situation, and Ava liked that about him.

Once the Menu came up, Ava planted herself on the couch. Looking up at Daryl, she gave a grin as she patted the spot next to her. Slowly, Daryl made his way over to the seat and plopped down as well.

“You ready?” She held up the remote.

Daryl gave a small grin at seeing her excitement. “Let’s do it.”

Ava took a breath before hitting play, and the two faded into silence. As the movie progressed, Ava pointed out scenes that Enid used to love as a kid while Daryl noted that he liked the colors. Ava couldn’t help but revel in how normal this all it felt; watching a movie late at night with a close friend, making comments and jokes, it all brought her back to the days before the end. She loved it.

But Ava didn’t love it as much as she loved falling asleep on Daryl’s chest, the pair lightly snoring as they left their worries to be handled on another day.   


	22. Trade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava and Daryl deal with the consequences while a new community promises prosperity...for a price.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Real life sucks, and so does this chapter but I promise things pick up.
> 
> And it won't take me a million months next time.

When Ava opened her eyes, she noticed a lot of things.

For one, the living room was pitch dark—through the curtains, she could see that dawn was barely breaking, the sky still black but holding the promise of light. Another thing she noticed was that the T.V. was on, playing soft oceanic sounds on a loop.

It was then Ava felt the unfamiliar sensation of a warm body against her own. Resting her chin on a hard chest, Ava’s breath caught in her throat as she gazed up at the man sleeping on her couch, his back propped against the arm of the seat. Daryl looked peaceful as he slept—it was the only time Ava saw him with such an expression. Wisps of hair covered his eyes, and Ava had to stop herself from reaching up and moving the strands out of the way. She felt Daryl shift underneath her, and she froze, not wanting to wake him. This could be a one-time thing, and, for some reason, Ava wasn’t ready for it to end. She calmed down when he didn’t wake up, the man instead wrapping his arms tighter around her waist.

Ava grinned and settled her ear back on his chest. His heartbeat was luring her into a slumber of her own when three loud knocks on the door made Ava jolt up. Daryl was slower in his reaction, eyes blinking awake as he slowly registered where he was. Ava kept her gaze on him, waiting for him to freak out—or even push her body off him. None of that happened—but Ava did watch as he nervously pursed his lips. The knocks continued, snapping the man out of his trance.

“You should get that.” He grumbled.

Ava blinked before nodding. She went to push herself off the couch, but was stopped by a weight on her back. With a small smirk, she looked back down at Daryl.

 “You have to let go of me first, tiger.”

Daryl didn’t even realize he had his hand on Ava’s back—he was too busy taking her in. Her hair was a mess, her eyes still beady with sleep, but Daryl was positive he had never seen anything so beautiful. Clearing his throat, and thoughts, Daryl removed his hand. Ava let out a nervous laugh as she padded her way to the door. Running a hand through her hair, she opened the door to see Maggie standing on the porch. She was already dressed, the woman always up early to check out the crops that refused to grow, but looked frazzled. Ava’s smile faded into worry.

“What’s going on?” She asked. “Is it the baby?”

“I’m fine, the baby’s fine.” Maggie shook her head. “The guy Rick and Daryl brought back broke out of his cell—the watch saw him go to Rick’s house. We gotta go.”

Any fluffy feeling Ava was experiencing suddenly dropped into horror. Daryl had told her about the guy who sabotaged their supply run, and if he was as spry as Daryl led her to believe, Rick would need help.

“Shit. I’ll grab my gun.” Ava then looked down at her shorts. “And pants.”

Maggie nodded. “Do you know where Daryl is? He wasn’t in the house--.”

Her words trailed off as her eyes wandered to the living room. Ava bit her lip and followed her gaze to see Daryl standing up, adjusting his vest. Daryl didn’t say a word, only nodding in greeting—he looked just as embarrassed as Ava felt. She turned back to Maggie, an amused glint in the farm girl’s eyes. Ava rubbed the back of her neck.

“I’ll get ready.”

Maggie didn’t speak, all her energy going into trying to fight the smile that threatened to take over her features. However, her battle failed. Ava pointed at her.

“Behave.”

Maggie cleared her throat before putting on a serious face.

“Yes ma’am.”

Ava turned on her heel and went upstairs, ignoring Maggie’s small giggle and Daryl’s downcast eyes. Passing Enid’s room, Ava peeked in, letting out a relived sigh when she saw her sister was still fast asleep. Ava would tell her about the ‘sleepover’, but she was happy it could be done later.

It was obvious today was going to be a long day.

* * *

 

By the time the trio made it to Rick’s house, the group was congregated around the kitchen table. Carl took up the head while Rick and Michonne sat on either side of the wooden table. Glenn gave a nod to Ava and Daryl as Maggie went to join him. Abraham looked between Ava and Daryl, and she wondered if he could sense the tension. He seemed like the kind of guy who could notice anything.

Ava couldn’t worry about those details, her eyes going to the stranger. He sat silently, his long brown hair covered by a grey beanie. A trench coat covered his form and a beard decorated his face. Ava bit back a scoff—the guy really did look like Jesus.

“How’d you get out?” Rick asked, pure curiosity in his tone.

“One guard can’t cover two exits,” Jesus explained. “Knots untie, locks get picked. And it’s pretty easy when a guard is late to a shift.”

Jesus glanced over to Daryl, the look quick but just slow enough for Rick to notice. The leader turned to face his friend, head tilting in questioning. Daryl was never one to skip out on a duty—especially when that duty consisted of watching an untrustworthy prisoner. The man in question shrugged.

“Lost track of time.”

Ava’s eyes narrowed. Daryl never mentioned that he had guard duty. If she had known, Ava never would have invited him in. Maybe that’s why he kept it a secret. Ava looked down while Daryl kept his eyes on Jesus. Michonne looked to Rick, a ghost of a smirk on her face. He looked between the pair, the sound of Jesus’ voice making him look away.

“I checked out your arsenal.” He interjected. “You’re well-equipped, but your provisions are low. Very low for the people you have—54?”

“More than that.” Maggie was quick to cut in.

Jesus grinned. “Well, I appreciate the cookie. My compliments to the Chef.”

“She ain’t here.” Daryl stepped forward with a growl.

“Look, we got off to a rough start, but we’re on the same side.” Jesus shifted in his seat to face Daryl. “You and Rick had every reason to leave me out there, but you didn’t.”

“We can still arrange that.” Ava voiced. “Give us a reason.”

He seemed relaxed, as if he had nothing to fear. Ava wanted him to know he was wrong. Yes, they were good people, but that didn’t mean they wouldn’t take him out if they needed to. She crossed her arms. Jesus turned to her, and he began to wonder if everyone in this Community was weary of new arrivals.

“I’m from a community a lot like this one. Part of my job is searching out other settlements to trade with.” He looked at Rick. “I took your truck because my community needs things, and you looked like trouble. I was wrong. I think our communities may be able to help each other.”

 Glenn fiddled with his gun. “Do you have food?”

“We’ve started to raise livestock.” He explained. “We scavenge, we grow.”

Ava raised a brow. Alexandria was running low on food; the ration sizes were growing smaller each day. Although she never complained, Ava could tell Enid was getting hungry. She was a growing girl, and Ava wanted her to be a healthy one.

However, she couldn’t let her emotions get in the way of her reasoning. She knew the risk of trusting a stranger. Jesus seemed like a nice guy, but he also appeared to be a smooth one—someone able to talk anyone into something.

“Why should we believe you?” Rick asked, not convinced.

“I’ll show you.” Jesus beamed. “We take a car, I can take you back home in a day, and you can all see who we are and what we have to offer.”

“Wait, you’re looking for more settlements?” Maggie asked, his words finally clicking. “You mean you’re already trading with other groups?”

Ava eyes widened at the realization. “How many are there?”

She always figured there had to be bigger groups out there, but she never pictured them so close. The thought filled her with hope—and a bit of fear. Not all these settlements could be good ones. Jesus grinned.

“Your word is about to get a whole lot bigger.”

For his sake, Ava hoped he was part of the good ones.

* * *

 

 “Do you trust him?”

Ava considered Enid’s question as the younger girl handed her a duffle bag filled with supplies. Although Jesus promised that the ride would only take a few hours, Rick was adamant on making sure the RV was fully stocked with provisions; they needed to be prepared if things went south at the Hilltop.

Ava prayed it wouldn’t come to that—Alexandria needed help, and if the Hilltop couldn’t give it to them, she had a feeling Rick would take it. She would follow the Sheriff into any battle, but a small part of her was tired of fighting. She was just starting to enjoy the peace of Alexandria, and the thought of it getting taken away made her stomach ache.

Ava decided not to worry about such a thing until it happened. Besides, she wasn’t accompanying them to Hilltop; if a fight did happen, there was nothing she could do about it. Ava followed Enid’s gaze to Jesus. He stood on the Grimes’ porch, talking to Michonne as the woman smiled at him. Perhaps he wasn’t all bad, but Ava knew better than to trust a man just because he had a good smile.  

“Jury’s still out.” Ava answered as she threw the bag in the RV. “He doesn’t seem conniving.”

Enid scoffed. “The sneakiest ones never do.”

“Good point.”

It was then Daryl let out a curse, and the girls looked to the front of the vehicle to see him struggling with the RV’s motor. Ava shook her head, wishing he would calm down. He seemed more frustrated than usual, and she knew it wasn’t just because of Jesus. They had only fallen asleep together, a purely innocent gesture, but it still seemed like it was…something. Ava didn’t know how to describe it.

“So,” Enid hummed. “Did Daryl enjoy Finding Nemo?”

Out of nervousness, Ava let out a soft laugh while Enid simply watched her, amused. It was stupid of Ava to think that Enid wouldn’t have heard them the night before—or even in the morning, if she was faking her sleep. Running a hand through her hair, Ava sighed.

“Don’t tell me we woke you.”

“You’ve never been known for having a ‘quiet’ laugh.”

Ava rolled her eyes, but still felt the heat of embarrassment on her cheeks. Enid simply stared, waiting for her older sister to elaborate what had occurred the night before. Ava glanced over at Daryl, his back turned to her as he conversed with Denise. Relieved that he was distracted, she scuffed her boot against the road.

Not liking the silence, Ava stepped forward, keeping her voice low as to not alert the others.

“Nothing happened.” Ava kept her voice low, honesty dripping from her tone. “He found the movie for you, and when I found out he never saw it, I invited him in. We just fell asleep.”

Enid was grateful Ava was telling her the truth—she didn’t like being kept in the dark, even with the most mundane facts. She was just glad Ava was opening up to someone, that she felt comfortable enough to be vulnerable around a person. Enid smiled.

“Ava, it’s fine.”

The older girl pursed her lips. “Really?”

“I like Daryl, you know that.” Enid reassured. “You two would be good together.”

“Whoa, okay, slow down.” Ava nervously giggled. “Like I said, nothing happened.”

Ava didn’t want Enid to get her hopes up. She and Daryl haven’t even had a chance to talk about the evening and this morning. For all Ava knew, she could be overthinking everything while Daryl wasn’t giving it a second thought.  Enid hummed.

“Yeah, but something could happen.” She grinned. “And when it does, you’ll do the laundry for a week.”

Ava rolled her eyes, but couldn’t hide her amusement. “Deal.”

Enid grinned before heading back towards Glenn and Maggie’s house, Ava watching with a smile as she took Maggie’s bag for her. Ever since Enid found out that the couple was expecting, she was much more caring around the expectant mother; Ava would even go as far to say that she was giving Glenn a run for his money.

“She seems happier.”

Ava looked away from the scene to see Daryl approaching her. She hoped she appeared calmer than she felt. To make her mind focus on one thing at a time, Ava followed Daryl’s gaze back to Enid to admire her once more.

“She told me last night that she doesn’t want to go beyond the wall anymore.” Ava admitted. “She wants to help the community.”

Daryl turned to Ava, unable to hide his surprise. “Enid said that?”

“Yep.” She laughed. “And it’s thanks to you.”

Daryl scoffed. “What makes you say that?”

“After you guys showed up, I think she finally saw a future for this place.” Ava turned to Daryl, a soft smile playing on her lips. “I know I did.”

At her words, the air between them shifted. Although Ava didn’t mean for her phrase to double in romantic meaning, it appeared that’s how it was going to be defined. Daryl scratched the back of his neck.

“I had fun last night.” He admitted.

Ava raised a brow at his slightly robotic tone. It was as if admitting the statement physically pained him. She rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help the teasing tone in her voice.

“Don’t sound so happy.”

“I did.” He reassured. “I’m just not used to it.”

Ava studied Daryl for a moment. The man refused to meet her eyes, and Ava wondered if he wasn’t just talking about the movie. Being on the road for so long, it’s easy to forget what life was like before. That once upon a time, you could spend the night ‘having fun’ with a friend. The first time Ava hung out with Denise, her eyes kept darting around the room, worried that something—or someone—would interrupt them.  Ava had a feeling that was a habit Daryl couldn’t kick—maybe last night was the first time he was able to sleep peacefully, laugh aloud. The thought that it was her to bring him that joy made Ava feel warm. The warmness quickly transformed into curiosity when another question came to her mind.

“Why didn’t you tell me you needed to watch Jesus?”

For the first time since beginning the conversation, Daryl made direct eye contact with Ava. Her brown orbs studied him, waiting for an answer. His own stomach twisted, and it wasn’t until he cleared his throat when he realized what it was—he was nervous. Ava was making him nervous. He didn’t get nervous.

“Didn’t want to be rude.”

Ava choked back a laugh as Daryl did his best to appear nonchalant. Out of the entire group, Daryl seemed to be the least worried about what people thought of him. Ava grinned. She knew it wasn’t his real reasoning, but she still didn’t want him to feel that he owed her anything.

“I would’ve understood.” She put her hands in her jacket pockets. “We could’ve done it tonight, or whenever--. “

 “Or maybe I didn’t want to leave.”

Ava blinked, taken back by her statement. From Daryl’s own silence, she had a feeling he wasn’t expecting to admit such a thing either. Daryl didn’t know why he did—maybe it was the way Ava was looking at him. As if she truly did enjoy his company.

“I didn’t want you to leave, either.” Ava admitted.

Daryl’s own lips turned up in a smile. Before finding Rick and the group, he always felt like a nuisance. That feeling came back when he entered Alexandria—until he met Ava. She didn’t sneer at him the way the other residents did, she treated him like a human. He was about to say more when Abraham announced that it was time for them to leave. As the group began to pile in the RV, Daryl didn’t move. Instead, he kept his eyes on Ava. He wasn’t ready to leave.

“You sure you don’t want to come?” He asked, slightly hopeful. “We might need you if things get ugly.”

Besides the fact that Daryl wanted to spend more time with Ava, he also knew that she had fighting skills the rest of the community were missing. He didn’t know what waited for them at Hilltop, but the rest of the community were already too excited about the idea of trading with them. Ava, however, seemed just as weary.

“I’m on training duty today.” Ava buried her temptation to ditch her commitments. “Besides, we need more bodies here. Just in case.”

Daryl hummed, hoping he was hiding his disappointment. “We have a flare, watch for it.”

Ava nodded. If things went south at Hilltop, they would have to be ready for an attack. Ava prayed it wouldn’t come to that; the community was getting better at fighting, but they weren’t ready for a war. With one last nod, Daryl moved past Ava and made his way to the RV. Before he could take a step, Ava turned around.

“Don’t get yourself killed, all right?” Ava called. “I’m starting to like you, Dixon.”

Daryl grinned.

“Yes ma’am.”

With that, he climbed into the vehicle. A few moments later, Ava was watching as the RV departed, the exhaust leaving her in a cloud of doubt. They would make it home safe, Daryl would make it home. That’s what she was repeating in her head when Enid came running up to her. The girl slowed down when she saw the worried look in her sister’s eyes.

For once, Ava had someone to worry about besides Enid, and it terrified her.

“I shouldn’t ‘get ahead’ of myself, huh?” Enid teased.

Ava rolled her eyes, but Enid didn’t miss the blush that overcame her cheeks as she spoke.

“Go help Rosita get the knives ready.” Ava loosely ordered, realizing that it was almost time to start training. “And shut up.”

Enid smirked as she gave a mock salute and walked towards the armory, giving Ava the time she needed to recover before appearing before a group of teenagers.

* * *

 

“How long do you think Rick and Michonne have been bumping uglies?”

Even if Daryl had been paying attention to Abraham’s presence, the question would still take him off guard. Unlike Abe, Daryl didn’t think of his friends’ sex lives. He had other things on his mind—he was still registering the fact that they were sitting in a mansion in another settlement. The Hilltop was a settlement of farmers—food, exactly what they needed, which was why the rest of the group was focused on how they could achieve a deal with Gregory.

However, instead of using his brain to help, Abe was asking Daryl an empty question. He shrugged.

“I dunno.”

“You and Ava?”

Daryl almost snapped the arrow he was holding in half. He should have known that his group would read way too much into his time spent with Ava. He didn’t meet Abe’s eyes.

“What about us?”

“You missed guard duty.”

Daryl huffed. He already had to deal with the lecture from Rick on their way to the settlement; _“It’s nice you’re opening up,” the Sheriff explained, “Just don’t forget about your duties.”_ Even his best friend ignored him when she said there was nothing to the night, Rick only glancing at Michonne as the two shared a grin. Daryl hated that. He hated when they pretended to know something when there was nothing to know.  

“Jesus.” Daryl rolled his eyes. “I fell asleep. That’s it.”

“That’s how it starts.” Noticing Daryl’s annoyance, Abe shrugged. “Look, I think it’s good that you’re thinking of settling down. I’m thinking of the same.”

That was it. The last thing Daryl wanted to be put in a category that didn’t exist in this world. It wasn’t fair to him, or Ava.

“Look around, man.” He scoffed. “Nothing about this is ‘settle’.”

Before Abraham could argue, a Hilltop resident walked through the door, startling the group. Gregory turned to the man, taking in his worried expression.

“What’s wrong?’

The man pointed to the door. “They’re back.”

Without sparing a glance to the group, Gregory hurriedly made his way out to the Hilltop’s yard. Daryl and Rick shared a look before following him out the door. Something was wrong.

* * *

 

“I could get used to this.”

Ava opened her eyes and looked over to Rosita, the woman soaking in the sun as the pair sat on the steps of the gazebo. They had been training the teens of Alexandria, but after noticing that they responded better to Enid and Carl’s teaching, the older pair decided to take a break.

A break. Ava never thought she would get one of those again. It reminded her of when she used to trick Enid into doing her chores for her; it was mean, but that’s what older siblings do. It also wasn’t all out of selfishness--Ava wanted Enid to spend a bit more time with Carl. She didn’t know what happened between them, but she had been seeing less of the boy, and Enid couldn’t afford to lose friends.

“Don’t get too comfortable.” Ava joked, remembering that the jig doesn’t usually last long. “They’ll realize that we’re not coming back.”

Rosita only hummed in response, and Ava grinned. When she first arrived to Alexandria, Ava could tell that Rosita held a sense of contempt for the community—and perhaps even Ava herself. Now, they realized that they worked well together. Maybe one day, they could even be friends.

“Working hard, ladies?”

Ava and Rosita grinned as Carol made her way over to the longing pair. Before either could answer, Enid called over.

“More like hardly working!”

Rosita scoffed as Ava did a sarcastic wave to her sister. However, the younger responded with a middle finger and a laugh that Carl soon joined in on. Ava rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide her amusement. Nothing like a little lighthearted teasing to do the soul some good.

“We’re old and feeble, Carol.” Ava explained.

Rosita nodded. “We need to relax.”

“Ah.” Carol shook her head, but smiled as she pulled out a case of cookies. “Well, these are for you two.”

Ava raised a brow as Rosita accepted the gift. Carol was still a mystery to Ava; the rest of Alexandria saw her as a ‘mother figure’, but Ava knew there was more. The woman was ready to slit throats If Deanna decided to kick Rick out, and now, she was putting on the airs of being a homemaker.

However, after getting a whiff of those cookies, Ava decided Carol could do whatever she wanted.

“Leave some for Enid, all right?” Carol teased.

Ava swallowed. “We need our nutrients. She’s young.”

 The sound of the gate opening made the trio look over. The RV made its’ reentry into the Community, and Ava looked down at her watch. They were back sooner than they thought—she hoped that meant good news.

However, when Maggie called for a meeting in the Church, Ava had a feeling she was wrong.

* * *

 

As the Community gathered into the Church and took their seats at the pews, Ava and Enid remained standing in the back. Ava was too nervous to sit down and listen. She saw Rick when he got out of the RV, his jacket stained with blood. Good news was nonexistent with that imagery stuck in Ava’s mind; food shortage or not, bloodshed wasn’t worth it.

“Maggie got us a deal.” Rick explained to the masses. “We’re getting food, eggs, fresh vegetables, but they’re not just giving them away. These Saviors…they almost killed Sasha, Daryl, and Abraham on the road and eventually they would have found us.”

Ava pursed her lips, the silence in the Church unnerving as Rick continued.

“They would have killed someone, or some of us, and then they would have tried to own us.”

Ava felt Enid tense beside her and couldn’t help but put an arm around her sister. That was her biggest fear—being owned, trapped, oppressed. Ava would never let that happen to her.

“And we would try to stop them, by then in that kind of fight, low on food? We could lose.” Rick surveyed the room. “We do this for the Hilltop, it is how we keep this place, it is how we feed this place. This needs to be a group decision. If anybody objects, here’s your chance to say your piece.”

The only sound in the room was the shuffling of people in their seats. They were too afraid to speak up—of course the people from Rick’s group already agreed to go, all that was left was the Alexandrians. Ava glanced at Enid. The older girl didn’t want to fight, especially when they weren’t attacked first, but they needed to do this.

They needed food, _Enid_ needed food. They also needed to keep this place safe. If they went against the Saviors now, they would be taking care of a problem before it became a problem.

“You sure we can do it?” Ava asked, her voice making everyone turn to the back of the Church. “Take them all out?”

“After seeing what this group has become?” Rick asked, a proud glint in his eye. “I’m sure.”

Before Ava could add on, Morgan stood up. “Then all we have to do is tell them that. It’s a choice you give them—a way out.”

“We have to come for them before they come for us.” Rick contradicted. “They don’t compromise.”

The two went through a back and forth, and Ava found herself in conflict. Maybe the Saviors could compromise, but Ava didn’t want to risk it if they didn’t. Alexandria had become a home for Ava and Enid, and she wasn’t ready to lose it.

So, when Rick offered a choice, Ava knew her decision.

“I’m not losing this place to hunger or assholes.” Ava spoke up. “I’m in.”

Rick nodded, a silent understanding, as Aaron stood up to agree.

“Seems like its settled. Not everyone has to fight.” Rick assured. “But the people that stay? They have to accept it.”

With that, he walked out of the Church, leaving everyone to their thoughts. However, feeling Enid’s gaze weighing on her, Ava knew her little sister wouldn’t keep her thoughts silent for long.

* * *

 

“I’m going too.” Enid’s voice carried up the stairs. “You can’t stop me.”

Ava scoffed as she walked into her bedroom, taking a duffle bag out of the closet. Just as she predicted, Enid's protests began as the moment they began their trek back to the house. Ava ignored her as she opened the bag. They would be attacking the Saviors tomorrow night, but they were leaving at the crack of dawn to get their plans with the Hilltop settled. Ava needed to prepare, and Enid’s whining was hampering her night.

“I want to protect this place, too.” She explained. “It’s not just your home.”

“Rick needs people here.” Ava assured. “You’ll be doing your part.”

Silence overtook the two sisters, and it was then Enid admitted her true fear.

“What if you don’t come back?”

Ava paused in her packing and looked over to Enid with a frown. Now it all made sense—why Enid glared at her the moment she spoke up in that Church. She didn’t want Ava to go. She wanted Ava to be just as content as she was behind the wall. What Enid didn’t understand was that Ava needed to do this; she couldn’t live with herself if Rick and company kept fighting her battles.

If Ava wanted peace, she would be apart of the fight.

“Then you can have my room.” Ava joked.

“Not funny.”

Ava sighed. “You’re strong. You can make it without me.”

“I know.” Enid bit her lip. “I’m just not ready yet.”

Ava pulled the girl into a hug, realizing she wasn’t ready for that factor either.

“Then I’ll be back before you know it.”

That was the plan, and Ava had no plans to change it.

 

 


	23. Ashes in Our Wake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The attack on the Compound comes with repercussions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the awesome feedback; It feels so good to be back, ya'll! I had a ton of fun with this--even though it is painful.
> 
> We're so close to meeting the Man. And I'm pumped.

_“We go in at night, while they’re sleeping.”_

Rick’s words rang in Ava’s head for the rest of the evening. As she sat on her porch steps, she wondered why that part of the plan stuck with her. Ava wasn’t afraid of taking life. If you were a survivor in this world, there was no way your hands weren’t stained with the blood of the living. However, the idea of taking someone’s life when they were defenseless?

“You don’t have to go.”

Ava looked up from her boots to see Daryl standing in the street, the light from the streetlamp illuminating his form slightly. During the meeting, Ava felt Daryl’s gaze weighing on her. It was as if he could sense her growing hesitance. Ava grinned to herself. It was always the quiet ones who knew the most.

“I was the first to agree to it, so I kind of do.”

Not only was Ava the first person to speak up at the Church, but she was the first one to voice her support for the plan. Despite the new developments, Ava still supported the idea of taking out a threat before they became a threat—she was tired of Alexandria feeling like a giant target. 

She just wished there was another way, but in this world, there was only one.

“Plus, if I back out now, Rick might kill me next.” Ava added, hoping to lighten the mood and distract herself.

“Nah.” Daryl scoffed, walking forward. “He likes you too much.”

“Good to know.”

Ava scooted over, giving Daryl just enough room to sit next to her. He let out a satisfied sigh as he sat down and took a cigarette out of his pocket. Ava watched as he lit it and stuck the stick between his teeth.

"Smoking kills." Ava playfully chided.

"What doesn't these days?" Daryl teased back with a slight nudge before growing quiet. “How does Enid feel about this?” 

“Worried. She’s worried that I won’t come back.”

“That makes two of us.”

Ava sent Daryl a pointed look. While Enid was worried that Ava might die fighting, it seemed that Daryl thought that Ava _couldn’t_ fight.

“I can handle myself, Dixon.”

“I know.” Daryl was quick to defend himself. “I just wonder if it’s going to be the same person coming back, is all.”

Ava felt her offense fade. Daryl was worried that she would lose herself; that taking another’s life would destroy the progress she made since being at Alexandria. Daryl didn’t think she was broken—Ava wanted to scoff, wishing he knew how wrong he was. 

“I haven’t been the same for a long time.” Ava admitted. “This? This will just be another bag to carry. But it’ll mean something, for this place.”

And Ava meant those words. If she had to kill people in their sleep to keep Alexandria thriving, she would just have to swallow her fear. For the future—for Enid. Daryl looked over at Ava, as if sensing the realization. He wondered what she was like before arriving in Alexandria—he knew it wasn’t easy. Looking back out to the empty street, Daryl mumbled.

“You won’t have to carry it alone.”

Ava looked over at Daryl, the man unable to meet her gaze. That was fine—she didn’t need to see his face to know he meant every word. Without a second thought, Ava rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

She focused on the sounds of the night and the feeling of Daryl wrapping his arm around her form to pull her closer.

* * *

 

_“We’ll be back by tomorrow morning.” Ava huffed as she finished loading the bags in the RV. “That means to go to bed at a decent time.”_

_“Too late.” Enid crossed her arms. “Carl and I already have all-nighter plans.”_

_“Should I be worried?”_

_“Of video games frying my brain? Yes. Don’t be gross.” Enid lightly chided before hugging Ava. “I love you.”_

_“I love you, too.” Ava tightened her grip around her sister. “And I’ll be back before you know it.”_

Ava ignored the constant bumps of the RV as she kept her focus on the passing trees. She was glad Enid was able to put her worries aside for their goodbye. If it was their last, Ava didn’t want Enid to have her last memory be one of malice towards her—perhaps that was why she swallowed her fear in the first place. Ava didn’t have time to think about Enid’s strategy as Rick laid on the horn of the RV, the vehicle now stopped as the passengers disembarked.

To get inside the Savior’s compound, they needed the head of Gregory. Or, in this case, the head of a dead one that could pass as the Hilltop leader. Ava followed Glenn and Heath into the roadside woods, hoping to get lucky in finding a twin. The deeper they went, the louder the snarls grew, and it was Ava who ran through the tall grass and plunged her knife if the back of one of their skulls. Glenn followed suit, and soon they had three walkers to choose from.

“You met the guy.” Ava nodded to Glenn before gesturing down to their choices. “What’d you think?”

“This one, maybe.” Glenn kneeled beside Heath’s kill. “If we cut the hair, trim the beard.”

Ava nodded, not believing that this was an actual conversation they were having. A head for a hostage; the Saviors idea of a trade made it a little easier to stomach killing them. A little.

“We’re gonna kill those people.” Heath spoke up as Glenn chopped the head. “I’ve been lucky. I haven’t had to do it before. Have you?”

He looked between Glenn and Ava, waiting for an answer. They were the only pair that have been outside of Alexandria for a long period of time, he figured they have had to do some awful things to survive. However, Glenn shook his head.

“I’ve been lucky, too.”

It was then their gazes went to Ava, waiting for an answer. She looked down. If there was ever a time to come clean, it was now.

“Two.” Ava confessed.

Heath raised a brow. “Why?”

“They were going to…” Ava shuddered. “They had Enid.”

That was all the men needed to understand, and Ava was relieved when Glenn offered a nod of sympathy. Ava wasn’t a killer, she was a defender.

“How’d,” Heath paused, swallowing. “How’d you feel? After?”

Ava fiddled with the knife in her hands, her eyes glued to the rotten blood it was now coated with. Not even Enid asked how she felt after killing—much like Ava, she wanted to forget it ever happened. Ava remembered feeling hollow after the experience; she didn’t feel much of anything, and all she wanted to do was lay down and cry. But, she couldn’t. Not when she had Enid to protect.

“You know when you see something that you can’t get out of your mind? And, afterwards, you can’t eat or sleep?” Ava asked, before sighing. “It’s worse than that.”

Heath ran a hand down his face, and Ava wished she could lie. But they needed to know the truth, they needed to know what they were getting into. Ava knew what to expect, and even she was still brimming with anxiety.

Silence overtook the trio as Glenn continued to chop the dead one’s head off, all of their eyes unblinking as they focused on the brutal task.

* * *

 

_“This is how we eat.” Rick reminded the frowning group. “This is how we eat.”_

The satellite outpost was quiet except for the muted shuffling of footsteps as the group made their way through the halls. Ava kept her gun up, her eyes squinting with focus as she peered through the scope. There was no turning back now, and Ava was okay with that.

“Check the doors. Find the arsenal.” Rick whispered. “We take them out.”

Everyone dispatched into their groups. Ava noticed that Heath went with Aaron and Rosita to find the arsenal. After seeing the how he reacted to Ava’s words, it was for the best. He couldn’t carry it. Ava went to the first door on her right, lowering her gun slightly as she placed her hand on the knob. Looking up, she noticed Glenn standing next to her, his gun up and ready to cover her.

He nodded, and that was all Ava needed to open the door. The two backed up as the door slowly opened, and Ava was the first to walk in. The room housed two Saviors, both men fast asleep in their cots. Unsheathing her knife, Ava walked to the bed on the right before kneeling at edge. She looked down at the balding man, a soft smile on his bearded lips.

He was having a good dream, and Ava didn’t know if that made this better or worse. Not wanting to think too much about it, Ava took a deep breath and embedded the blade in the man’s forehead. She let out a shaking breath as she slid the knife out of his head, the blood dripping onto her jeans. The physical stain didn’t even compare to the weight on her heart. 

Ava was foolish to think killing was something she could get used to. 

Rising to her feet, Ava looked over to the neighboring bed. Glenn was kneeling, the blade already sunk into the Savior’s forehead. Ava made her way over to him, frowning at the sight of him shaking.

“You were right.” Glenn whispered as he removed the blade. “It is worse.”

“You're doing this for your child.” Ava reminded, hoping it would slightly ease his pain. "It's...for a reason." 

Although Glenn nodded, Ava could tell her words didn't have the impact she wished it did. Nothing could make this feel good. Before she could make her way out, Glenn held onto her wrist, his gaze straight ahead. Following his look, Ava's eyes widened at the sight of pictures of brutalized humans. Their heads were bashed in, some to the point that they were only mush. Ava put a hand to her mouth, trying to stop the vomit that was threatening to come up.

Glenn looked just as sick as Ava, but before he could say a word, the sound of a blaring alarm echoed throughout the hall. The two shared a look, and Ava growled. 

“Shit.”

* * *

 

Enid woke up with a start, the light of the video game illuminating the dark room. She didn’t even realize she fell asleep, but she wasn’t shocked that exhaustion took over her; she wasn’t the first to fall asleep, after all. Enid looked over at the other end of the couch, a small grin on her face when she saw that Carl was still knocked out. It was always the ones who wanted to do all-nighters that ended up passing out.

She stretched before getting up from the couch, walking over to the front room windows to get a peek. It had to be nearing dawn—the sun teasing its appearance with a light purple sky. Almost dawn, and Ava was nowhere in sight. Enid bit her lip.

“It’s not even daylight yet.” Carl’s tired voice filled the room, and Enid turned around to see him sitting up. “They’re probably just…finishing up.”

Enid didn’t know if Carl was trying to reassure her or himself. His dad was out there—as well as Michonne. He had a lot to lose, too.

“Yeah.” Enid closed the curtain. “Ready for round five?”

Carl nodded. “Sure.”

Neither particularly wanted to play another racing game, but they did want a distraction. They needed a distraction.

* * *

 

Ava let out a grunt as a Savior pinned her against the concrete wall. At this point, she didn’t know how many of the men she mowed down, but it was enough to make her reload her gun two times. However, it seemed like the weapon would be getting a break as the man placed a blade on her throat.

“Who the hell are you?!” He yelled, spittle decorating Ava’s face. “What do you want?!”

She wrapped her fingers around the handle of her own knife. “To get by.”

With that, she drew the weapon and stabbed the blade straight into the man’s gut before kicking his body out of the weapon. Once he hit the ground, Ava embedded the blade into his forehead, ending his second life before his first even began.  Without a second thought, Ava rose to her feet and took off down the hall, ready to bring down anyone else who got in her way.

* * *

 

_“This is one of the locked ones!” Rosita shouted over the gunfire. “I’ll cover you! Open it!”_

_Ava began kicking out the door long before Rosita finished talking. She let all her anger out, grunts and groans as she replayed the events in her head; stabbing a sleeping man, watching the bodies she shot at hit the floor. Feeling nothing._

_The door swung open just as the gunfire ceased._

Daylight flooded the compound the moment Daryl and Rick opened the garage door. The sunlight only blinded Ava for a moment as she followed the group out of the building, her gun up as she examined their surroundings. Once it was determined that they were clear, the group lowered their weapons and Ava let out a breath.

It was over, but it didn’t feel like a victory.

“There’s room for one more.”

Ava forced a grin as Tara trailed off for the third time. Tara and Heath were heading on a two-week run, and they decided to leave directly from the compound. Although the thought of driving as far away from this place as possible sounded tempting, Ava had much more important things to do.

“I have to get home to Enid.” Ava gave a polite smile. “But thanks for the offer.”

“It was worth a shot.” Tara grinned before pulling Ava into a hug. “Take care of yourself. And Enid. And Denise.”

A small laugh left Ava’s lips as the two separated. “I will.”

With one last wave, Heath and Tara departed the scene. Once they were out of the sight, Ava leaned against the chain link fence, closing her eyes.

“What you thinking about?”

Daryl’s low voice made Ava open her eyes and look over at the man. He rested his hand on the fence, his tired eyes glued to Ava’s.

“I hope this is the last time we have to do this.” Ava sighed. “At least…for a while.”

Ava wasn’t an idiot. She knew threats were always going to come, but she also knew that they deserved a break. Maybe this deal with the Hilltop could be the beginning of a new time of peace for Alexandria. Her illusion of peace was immediately squashed as the roaring of a motorcycle filled the air, the sound making everyone turn to see a man exiting the outpost riding a familiar bike.

“Son of a bitch!” Daryl yelled as he ran over.

Ava was quick to raise her gun, aiming the weapon right at the man, she sent a bullet into his shoulder. He let out a yelp as he was knocked off the bike, Daryl completing the job as he tackled him onto the green.

“Where’d you get the bike?!” He demanded to know as he delivered a punch.

The rest of the group ran over to the pair, Ava reaching them just as Rick aimed his weapon at the man’s head, ready to the pull the trigger. The bloody Savior glared.

“Do it!” He yelled. “Like you did everyone else, right?!”

_“Lower your gun, prick.”_

The static voice of a woman made everyone instantly raise their weapons, any sense of tiredness leaving the group. Ava gripped tightly onto her gun, ready to end this.

“Come on out.” Rick spoke into the receiver. “Let’s talk.”

_“We’re not coming out, but we will talk.” She responded. “We’ve got a Carol and a Maggie. I’m thinking that’s something you want to chat about.”_

* * *

 

“Tara told me she loved me yesterday.”

Enid turned away from the medicine cabinet to send Denise a smile. After falling asleep for a few more hours at Carl’s house, and eating a breakfast made by Olivia, the kids decided to go their separate ways. Carl had chores to do—though Enid figured they were more of a distraction than actual housework.

The group still wasn’t back from their raid on the Compound. She tried not to go to the dark places of her mind; they could be at Hilltop right now, hashing out the deal with Gregory. Or, lying dead in the building. It was moments like these Enid missed cell phones; her question could be answered with a single text.

To escape her thoughts, Enid followed Carl’s lead and went to the doctor’s office in Denise’s house. The woman was kind enough to give Enid a few tasks around the office, one of them being to organize the medicine cabinet.

“What did you say?” Enid asked.

“I told her I’ll tell her when I get back.” Denise pursed her lips. “What if she doesn’t?”

“She won’t keep you waiting.” Enid grinned. “Tara will do anything to come back to you.”

Enid hoped Ava was the same.

* * *

 

_“If anything happens to her, I’ll burn this whole place down.”_

_Ava watched Daryl pace the warehouse, frowning. “We’ll get them back. We will.”_

_“We have to be smart about this.” Rick added, sensing Daryl’s anger. “We’ll go in, grab them, get out.”_

The door of the assigned meeting place opened before Glenn could do it himself. From behind him, Ava aimed at the opening, only to freeze when she saw Maggie and Carol. Relief washed through her veins as Glenn embraced his wife, Daryl doing the same with Carol. They were alive, hell, they were safe with no sign of their attackers near.

It felt too easy. Maybe it was too good to be true. Ava lowered her gun as she entered the warehouse, looking between Carol and Maggie.  

“Where are they?”

“They’re dead.” Maggie answered, her voice shaking. “The ones that took us…they’re all dead.”

There was clearly a story to be told, but taking in the haggard forms of the pair, Ava knew it was one that may never be known.

“No one’s coming for you.” Rick spoke to the hostage. “You might as well talk.”

“Let him burn.” Daryl growled.

Ava gripped tighter onto her gun. She wanted nothing more than to kill the Savior, but they had to be smart. It was clear that Gregory was holding back when he spoke to them about Negan—there was more to know, and this man may be their only source.

“Was Negan in that compound last night, or was he here?” Rick asked, ignoring Daryl’s input.

“Both.” The man grinned, slowly turning to Rick. “I’m Negan, shit head.”

A shiver ran down Ava’s spine that was soon replaced by a jolt as Rick fired his gun, putting a bullet right between Negan’s eyes. Her ears rang, but she didn’t feel pain—only satisfaction that they would never have to hear Negan’s name again.

Ava glanced over at Daryl, the man just as unfazed as her. However, it was Carol’s shaking body. She didn’t look like herself—at least, not the gunslinger Ava saw her as when she first arrived at Alexandria. Ava placed a hand on the older woman’s shoulder, the touch making her tense but she relaxed once she saw who was Ava.

“We’re going to get you home.” Ava whispered. “You don’t have to do this anymore.”

Carol frowned. “You're a terrible liar.”

Ava dropped her hand from Carol’s shoulder as Daryl led her out of the warehouse. She wished she could lie to herself, but even Ava knew something was off.

This didn’t feel like the end.

* * *

 

“They’re back!”

At Spencer’s call, Enid closed the comic book she was reading and hurried off of her front porch just in time to see the gates of Alexandria open and welcome a line of trucks. She smiled at the sight of Ava getting out of the backseat, Daryl following suit. Even from the distance, Enid could see Ava’s blood-soaked clothes and tired demeanor. It was a long twenty-four hours for her sister, and surely it was one full of sacrifices.

“See?” Denise grinned as she stood next to Enid. “They’re only a little late.”

Enid scoffed, knowing Denise was the more outwardly anxious one.

“You’re right.” Enid shrugged. “Silly me.”    

With a bag full of guns strapped to her back, Ava began the slow walk to the armory. However, once she caught a glimpse of Enid, her pace quickened. After the day she had, all Ava wanted to do was hold her sister tight—luckily, Enid didn’t object as she wrapped the girl in a firm embrace.

“Told you I’d be back.” Ava rubbed Enid’s back.

“Please.” Enid tried to play it cool. “I wasn’t worried.”

Ava let out a small laugh before kissing her head. “Sure.”

“Well, looks like everyone got back in one piece.” Denise spoke up as the sisters separated. “Guess my services aren’t need. Thank god.”

Ava looked back towards her group. Glenn still had a firm hold on Maggie as the pair made a beeline for their house. Daryl was busy helping Carol, the woman still looking shook to her core. Even Rick looked exhausted, the leader running a hand down his tired face as the weight of the day finally seemed to take hold.

“Yeah.” Ava sighed. “We’re all just fine.”

* * *

 

Although Enid fell asleep quickly—a product of spending the night before uncomfortably on a couch—the sound of breaking glass made the girl bolt upright in bed. Not wanting the creak of the wooden floor to alert the intruder, Enid slowly got out of bed before rummaging through her nightstand drawer. When she found the knife Ava had made her stow away, she quietly made her way out to the hallway and towards the stairs.

The house was quiet, Ava no doubt fast asleep in her room. Enid didn’t mind—her older sister needed her rest, and would no way be in the right state of mind to fight. It was Enid’s turn to defend her. However, as Enid reached the bottom of the stairs, she realized that she wouldn’t need to fight off an intruder because there wasn’t one at all.

Flicking on the kitchen light, Enid watched as Ava turned around. The girl was couched on the ground, surrounded by pieces of glass. She let out a tense breath.

“Shit, Enid. You scared me.” Ava trailed off, noticing the weapon. “Were you going to stab me?”

Looking down at the knife, Enid placed it on the counter. “I was going to _save_ you.” She explained before sighing. “What happened?”

“I was thirsty and missed the counter.” Ava ran a hand through her hair. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

It was then Enid noticed the dark circles underneath Ava’s eyes, the weariness carved on her features. She hadn’t slept at all tonight, Enid could tell. She could also hear the slight shakiness in her voice, as if she was fighting a cough in her throat.

“Don’t worry about it.” Enid’s voice was gentle as she stepped forward. “You all right?”

Ava remained on the ground. She was far from okay. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw the faces of the men she slaughtered in their sleep. Ava heard the screams of those she shot. The desperate voice of the Savior who wanted to know why she was doing this.

_“What the hell do you want?!”_

 “Ava?”

Enid’s soft voice was the last straw. Ava’s mouth released a sob as tears fell from her tired eyes. She wanted it all to end, she couldn’t do this anymore. Without a second to spare, Enid rushed over to Ava. She got on her knees behind the girl and wrapped her arms around her older sister, laying her head on her back as she allowed Ava to weep.

 Enid closed her eyes, wishing she could do something more for Ava. However, when she felt Ava grip onto the hands that were around her waist, Enid realized this was what she needed. The broken girl needed permission to cry, and that’s what Enid was giving her.

Ava was always the strong one, but everyone needed to break occasionally.

“I’m right here.” Enid whispered.

And that’s where she stayed for the rest of the night. 

 


	24. Way Down We Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava convinces Daryl to go on a run with her and Denise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No spoilers but...ya'll are going to love this and then hate me next chapter. Enjoy! ;)

The days following the compound raid passed in a blur. Nothing excited happened, and Ava welcomed the peace, even if it wasn’t the same as before. The days were short, but the nights felt longer than before, Ava spending most of them staring up at her ceiling until the early morning hours. A weight on her chest kept her awake, a weight that seemed to be telling her that the peace wouldn’t last long. Something was waiting for them.

The Wolves were gone. The Saviors were dead. Negan was dead. What could be next?

Her worries faded in the daylight, replaced with the anxiety that came with Enid following her every move. Neither spoke of Ava’s breakdown, the only proof that it happened being that the pair woke up in Enid’s bed the next morning. Ava didn’t want her little sister to worry about her. Enid finally had the chance to be a teen, and she wasn't taking it.

“I’m fine.”

Enid kept her eyes up ahead as she kept up with Ava’s pace. “I know you are.”

Ava was strong, Enid didn’t need to be reminded of that. But she couldn’t deny that the sight of Ava weeping on the kitchen floor didn’t freak her out. Ava was strong, but she wasn’t okay, and Enid didn’t want to be missing the next time Ava needed her.

“Then why the following?” Ava asked, still walking.

“I’m bonding.”

Ava stopped in her tracks, the sudden pause making Enid skid to a stop. The older girl crossed her arms.

“You’ve been attached to my hip for three days.” Ava pointed out. “Anymore ‘bonding’, we’ll be fused together.”

Enid put a hand to her chest, feigning offense. “Ouch.”

“I appreciate what you’re doing.” Ava was genuine. “But you can’t ignore your other responsibilities around here. Aren’t you scheduled to help Olivia with inventory?”

The younger girl sighed. She should’ve known that Ava would find out she was missing a few of her job assignments. Leave it to Maggie to always be on top of things. Taking Enid’s silence as a confirmation, Ava placed her hands on her shoulders.

“Go.”

“Fine.” Enid drawled out before pushing Ava’s hands from her and beginning her trek in the opposite direction. However, halfway down the street, the girl turned around.  “But if you need anything…”

Ava grinned. “You’ll be the first one I call.”

Even from the far distance, the bright smile Enid gave back was enough to warm Ava for the entire day. Maybe she would miss having Enid around, but Ava couldn’t deny the small feeling of freedom she had from not having someone breathing down her neck.

Ava turned around, ready to head to the training location but instead was cut short by Denise standing in front of her.

“Jesus.” Ava mumbled, putting a hand to her chest. “You scared me.”

“My bad.” Denise grinned. “I just didn’t want to interrupt the moment.”

“What’s up?”

The Doctor’s grin faltered, and the sick feeling in Ava’s stomach seemed to make an appearance in the daylight.

“I need a favor.”

* * *

 

“After I got out of DC, I just drove.” Denise explained to the pair as Daryl scanned the map. “I remember seeing it right when I realized I had no idea where I was going: Edison’s Apothecary and Boutique. They had drugs.”

Daryl passed the map to Ava. “How do you know they still got ‘em?”

“It isn’t that far.” Ava answered for Denise, sensing the Doctor’s nervousness around Daryl. “Even if they don’t have meds, they might have other stuff.”

“And I’m going with you.” Denise added. “I can ID the meds, and I know how to use a machete.”

Although that was enough for Ava, Daryl didn’t seem too convinced. Ava couldn’t blame him; it was risky to bring their only Doctor outside the walls, but the area was relatively clear of walkers. Plus, the location of the place was out in the open, they would be able to spot danger miles away. Daryl turned to Ava, knowing that the girl had known Denise longer than he had.

“You okay with this?” 

“I trained her myself, she’s good.” Ava said before shrugging. “And we’ll be there to protect her.”

Ava believed every word she spoke, but she was also doing this out of selfishness. Ava needed to get out of Alexandria for a bit, to escape the feeling of doom she had been a victim to since returning from the compound. Daryl looked between the two women, fighting the urge to grin at the sight of them doing their best “pretty please” smiles. He sighed.

“I’ll get the truck.”

* * *

 

_“If anything happens to Denise, Tara will kill you.” Enid half joked as she wrote down the number of beans they had. “You know that, right?”_

_“She’ll try.” Ava teased back. “It’s just a quick scavenging trip, I’ll be back by sunset. You’re responsible for dinner.”_

_“Canned corn it is.”_

The grinding gears of the truck made it easy for Ava to tune out Denise’s lecture to Daryl about how to properly drive a stick-shift, a speech she was sure Daryl was ignoring himself. Instead, Ava thought about how well Enid took the news about her leaving. Maybe she wasn’t as clingy as Ava characterized her to be—or maybe even her little sister could sense that she needed a change of scenery.

“Ava.”

Daryl’s low voice snapped her out of her thoughts as the truck slowed to a stop. A fallen tree blocked their path and, if the moving leaves were any indication, they had some friends stuck underneath the shrub. Daryl was the first to leave the car, and Ava turned to Denise.

“Stay here.” Ava unbuckled her seat belt. “This won’t take long.”

The Doctor nodded, happy to let the experts do their thing. Ava jumped out of the car, closing the door behind her before making her way to the tree. Moving a few of the discarded branches, Ava took in the sight of a walker reaching for her form. She looked up at Daryl, his gun raised to cover Ava.

“This didn’t take long.” She sighed.

Pulling her knife out of her belt, Ava stabbed into the brain, making the dead one fall limp. As she began to rummage through his backpack, Daryl spoke up.

“Why me?”

She narrowed her eyes. “Excuse me?”

“Glenn wasn’t on shift today, neither was Rosita.” He continued. “Why’d you come to me?”

Ava pursed her lips. Denise was the one who asked if Daryl was busy today, making it obvious she wanted him to tag along. However, Ava would be lying if the idea of spending some time alone with him wasn’t a big draw. She was still trying to figure out her feelings, and maybe today would push her in the direction she needed.

“Denise asked for you, specifically.” Ava paused before adding, “And maybe I wanted you to come…maybe.”

Slowly, Ava looked up at him, worried about what she would see. Daryl’s facial expression didn’t change, not even a twitch. However, there was something about his eyes. Ava could swear that they were softer than before as he nodded. 

“Well, all right then.”

* * *

 

Since Olivia promised Rick she would watch Judith, Enid was the only one on duty when Maggie walked into the garage. The pregnant woman was still recovering from the events at the compound; Ava didn’t tell Enid the whole story, but she did know about the kidnapping. Enid was glad the Saviors were dead, they deserved it after what the group had to go through.

“Hey Enid.” Maggie grinned at the girl. “How’s inventory?”

“We all have jobs to do.” Enid gave the polite answer for ‘boring’. “What’d you need?”

“Chocolate.” She answered too quickly. “Chocolate would be great.”

Enid smirked, knowing a craving when she saw it. Disappearing into the back, Enid dug two bars out of the freezer before making her way back to Maggie. The woman put her hand out, stopping Enid from passing her the bars.

“Oh, that’s too much.” Maggie shook her head. “I don’t want to take more than I need.”

Enid rolled her eyes. “You deserve it. Come on.”

“You’re trouble.” Maggie sighed, but took the candy anyway.

“It’s my middle name.”

* * *

 

_“Hold up.” Denise’s voice made Daryl stop. “Looks like a straight shot if we follow the tracks.”_

_“No tracks.” Daryl shut her down. “We’ll take the road.”_

_“That’s twice as far.” Ava’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What’d you have against tracks?”_

_Daryl didn’t answer her, instead, he kept walking the road he chose. Ava should’ve been more offended by the sudden cold shoulder, but she was only annoyed as Denise followed his path._

_“We should stick together.”_

_Ava waved them both off before turning right and taking the tracks. She was always down for a shortcut._

“About time.”

Ava teased the pair as they reached her loitering form. Her smile faded as Daryl brushed past her, his eyes set on the strip mall. Someone was a sore loser. 

“I didn’t mean to choose him over you back there.” Denise sheepishly apologized.

Ava put her hand up. “Don’t worry about it. It’s always good to go with your gut out here.”

“Who taught you?” Denise asked suddenly. “You know, how to survive out here? Fight?”

As the pair walked into the strip mall, Ava pursed her lips. Despite knowing Denise for a long time, Ava realized she never really told the Doctor anything about herself. She grinned to herself. Ava’s dad would want her to say that it was him who taught her a way around a gun, but even he knew that was a lie.

“I dated a gun-nut in college, a real survivalist type.” Ava answered. “He was an asshole, but a good teacher.”

Denise hummed. “Can’t relate.”

The two women giggled as they reached the apothecary, their laughter dying down when they saw Daryl putting his ear up to the door. Ava raised a brow, waiting to hear if he had heard any growls from the dead. When Daryl nodded, Ava took her backpack off and dug through it until she took out a crowbar, handing it over to the man.

“Me and her are going to do this.” Daryl informed Denise as he stuck the bar in the door. “You listen to everything we say, got it?”

Denise nodded before turning a wide-eye look to Ava. The other woman gave a sympathetic smile and a shrug. Unlike Daryl, Ava believed that Denise could make it out here—at least, during a scavenging trip. She wished that he would stop looking at her like a liability. After a few more jimmies, the door swung open. Ava sent a smile to Denise.

“Showtime.”

Daryl walked in first, holding up his rifle as Ava followed, a flashlight in her grip. The sound of gagging was what let Ava know that Denise was right behind her.

“Are we about to find out what you had for breakfast?” Ava asked, a good-natured tease.

“Oatmeal.” Denise muttered. “Just so you know.”

Ava couldn’t blame Denise. The building smelled of pure rot; the only reason she wasn’t gagging was because she was used to it. The smell of death was common in this world. Ava weaved in and out of the aisles, shining her flashlight over a few of the souvenirs within the gift shop. She stopped short when her light gleamed off a sign: Pharmacy.

“Score.”

Daryl followed Ava up to the counter, the man placing his crowbar underneath the door as he pushed it up and open. Ava couldn’t help but let out an excited laugh at the number of pills in front of them; they were the first to get in there.

“If you put them on the counter I can tell you--.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” Daryl interrupted Denise as he hopped the counter. “We’ll take it all.”

“You sure?” The Doctor asked.

Ava shrugged as she climbed the counter herself. “We have enough room, might as well.”

God forbid they only took a few of the bottles, leaving something that a resident would truly need. Ava and Daryl worked quickly, placing the bottles in their chosen bags while Denise browsed the store. Glancing over at Daryl, she couldn’t help but grin at the pills he was holding in his hand, a light giggle escaping her lips.

“What?” Daryl asked, pausing in his cleanout.

“Nothing.” Ava grinned, nodding to his haul. “I just love a man who’s honest.”

Daryl glanced down at the bottle in his hands: Viagra.

“Oh, hush.” He chided, though Ava could hear the humor in his voice.

She grinned as she went back to work. Whatever his problem was with the tracks was over now, the tension relieved due to the wonders of male enhancers. However, the lightness of the conversation faded the moment a thud was heard; the sound continuous. Ava and Daryl paused in their haul, the girl leaning over the counter to get a good listen.

“It’s just one.” Ava concluded. “In that closet.”

Daryl nodded. “Sounds like its stuck, too.”

“Should we take care of it?”

Ava looked over at Denise, noticing the fear in the Doctor’s eyes. She may have seen a walker up close, but she never had to deal with the action of killing them. Ava remembered that Denise had only been outside Alexandria the very beginning of the end, when the world thought they could solve the problem by killing every dead one. She didn’t understand that some could be left alone.

“It’s not coming out anytime soon.” Ava reassured. “Don’t worry, we’re fine.”

“If not, Ava will handle it.” Daryl joked, sending a smirk Ava’s way.

“Thanks, man.”

* * *

 

“What happened at the compound?”

The question came out of nowhere for Glenn, the man nearly tripping over his feet and off the guard tower. While on her break from the inventory, Enid decided to bring Glenn a bit of lunch; with Abraham out with Eugene, he was pulling a double shift. She sat cross-legged on the platform, ignoring his reaction.

“How did we go from ‘Star Wars’ to this?” Glenn asked, trying to lighten the mood.

Enid shrugged. Granted, she could have been a little smoother with her transition—or even had one at all.

“Ava won’t tell me.”

After her breakdown, Enid expected Ava to be a bit more open about the raid, for her walls to come down. If anything, Ava built them higher. Glenn sighed. If he had a little sister, he wouldn’t want to tell her that he stabbed sleeping people either, even if they were considered the enemy.

“Well, there’s probably a good reason for that.” Glenn attempted to defuse the situation. “And I’m not going to go behind your sister’s back.”

“Fine.” She rolled her eyes, picking up the potato chip bag. “See ya.”

Glenn watched as she climbed down the ladder. “I wasn’t done with those!”

“Yeah, you were!”

* * *

 

_The sound of glass shattering made both Ava and Daryl run to the counter, ready to attack. However, they both calmed down when they saw it was only Denise, the woman knocking into a table. Ava was relieved nothing went wrong, but her pounding heart demanded answers._

_“The hell happened?”_

_“Nothing.” Denise shook her head, her eyes watering. “Just…nothing.”_

_With that, the Doctor hurried out of the store, leaving Ava and Daryl to put the pieces together._

The door to the closet was opened, and Ava could catch a glimpse of the walker trapped inside of it. She sighed, realizing why Denise had looked like she saw a ghost—technically, she did. With their packs full, Daryl and Ava exited the store, Ava frowning at the sight of Denise sitting on the curb, wiping a few stray tears.

Before she could speak comfort, Daryl’s gentle tone cut through the air.

“You did good finding this place.”

Denise nodded, and Ava stepped in front of her to offer a hand. Taking it, she hoisted Denise to her feet, a sympathetic smile on her face.

“It’s always hard the first time.” 

“Okay.”

It wasn’t a convincing answer, but Ava figured she would have to take it as they began their trek back to the truck. She wasn’t feeding Denise lies—the first-time scavenging was always the roughest. Ava and Enid both threw up the first time they smell the rotting flesh in an enclosed space, but they got better. They needed to if they wanted to live; being in Alexandria since the beginning, Denise didn’t have that motivation.  

“So, was he older or younger?” Daryl asked, turning to Denise.

Ava didn’t turn around to look at the pair, but she did smile at the gesture to get to know Denise better.

“Older by six minutes.” Denise answered. “My parents came up with the ‘Dennis, Denise’ thing on one of their benders. He was brave…and angry.”

Daryl huffed. “Sounds like we had the same brother.”

Ava blinked. She never knew Daryl had a sibling. He never told her. It explained why he was understanding when it came to Ava’s situations with Enid—he had been there before. When they reached the tracks, Ava was ready to pass them when Daryl veered off in their direction. She paused.

“I thought you hated tracks.” She crossed her arms.

Daryl shrugged. “It’s faster, right?”

Ava watched as he followed the tracks, seemingly without a care in the world. Denise stood next to her. Ava shook her head in disbelief.

“All that huffing about the tracks, and now he’s using them.”

Denise gave Ava a slight nudge. “Maybe someone changed his mind.”

With a wink, Denise went to follow Daryl. Ava was beginning to realize there was a lot she didn’t know about Daryl Dixon—she hoped to get the chance to find out.

* * *

 

_“Older or younger?”_

_Daryl turned to look at Ava, her gaze already level on him. The pair had been walking side-by-side in comfortable silence, Denise taking up the rear. He didn’t need to ask what she was referring to, he figured the question would come up sooner rather than later._

_“Older, and he never let me forget it.”_

_Ava nodded, knowing that tactic all too well. “Do you miss him?”_

_A beat of silence passed between the pair, and Ava was just about to tell Daryl he didn’t need to answer such an intrusive question. However, she didn’t need to._

_“Sometimes.” He admitted. “He was an asshole, but he had his moments.”_

_It was then Daryl dove into a story about Merle; one of his favorites about a hunting trip that ended with poison ivy in obscene places. Daryl didn’t know why Ava made him want to share everything, but hearing her laugh ring like a bell, only gave him more motivation to continue. He wanted to tell her everything._

_“Okay, wait.” Ava spoke through giggles, making Daryl smile. “Did he really--.”_

_Her question got cut off by the sound of growls and human struggle. Turning around, Ava instantly broke out into a run when she saw that Denise was no longer behind them._

As Ava got closer, she could see Denise straddling a walker with her machete in hand. She quickly unsheathed her knife, ready to save Denise when the girl held up her hand.

“Don’t!”

She needed to do this herself. Ava and Daryl gave her the opportunity by backing up, their grips tight on their weapons. However, they never needed to use them as Denise stabbed the brain of the walker, allowing it to go limp. Ava watched with wide eyes as Denise got to her feet, puking the moment she stood up straight. Daryl cringed, but Ava didn’t move. It was bound to happen at least once today.

“I threw up on my glasses.” Denise sighed.

Ava didn’t say a word, only crossing her arms as Denise left the frames behind and went to open the cooler they deemed “not worth it”. Ava could accept a lot of the things Denise pulled during their trip, but completely disregarding what she and Daryl said was not one of them. Opening the cooler, she pulled out a six pack of sodas, only taking the orange can.

“What the hell was that?” Daryl yelled, his limit broken. “You could’ve died, you know that?!” 

“Yeah, I do.”

Ava ran a hand through her hair, trying to control her anger. Luckily, Daryl had enough of the emotion for the both as he stepped forward, his volume growing.

“Are you hearing me?!”

“Who gives a shit?!” Denise fired back. “You both could’ve died killing those Saviors, but you didn’t. You want to take chances, that’s how you live. That’s what I did.”

Ava shook her head. She couldn’t believe Denise was comparing the compound raid to getting a cooler. She didn’t know what it was like that night, and it was wrong for her to assume anything about it.

“For a couple of damn sodas?” Ava’s tone was dangerously low.

“Nope.” Denise held up the orange can as she walked between the pair. “Just this one.”

Ava clenched her fist before following Denise, Daryl in tow. She stepped onto the train tracks, feeling herself beginning to fume with anger the closer she got to the Doctor.

“That was stupid, Denise.” Ava spat, making the woman stop. “When we tell you something isn’t worth it, it isn’t.”

It was the nice way of saying “we know more than you.” Ava could be meaner, but she knew that wouldn’t get them anywhere. Denise needed to hear her.

“Do you have any clue on what this whole thing is to me?” Denise shot back. “I’m not making this up as I go along, I have training in this shit.” She looked over to Daryl. “I asked you to come along because you’re brave like my brother and, sometimes, make me feel safe.”

Daryl’s glare softened, and Ava wondered if he had ever been told such a confession before. Denise then turned to Ava.

“And I wanted you here because you’re scared—you’ve been ever since you got back from the Saviors.” Denise’s tone was gentle. “You’re stronger than you think you are and it gives me hope that maybe I can be too.”

Ava tensed her jaw, suddenly feeling as if she was being suffocated. Exposed. Daryl looked over to her, and she couldn’t find the strength to meet his gaze. She wanted to appear strong, but Denise was right. She had been living in fear of the unknown ever since the raid, and Ava didn’t know how to escape it.

“I could’ve gone with Tara. I could’ve told her I loved her, but I didn’t because I was afraid.”

Denise went on, having a realization right before Ava and Daryl. The pair didn’t say a word, Ava was hanging onto her every word. Denise shook her head before continuing.

“That’s what’s stupid.” She concluded. “Not coming out here, not facing my shit. It makes me sick that you guys aren’t even trying because you’re strong and you’re smart and you’re both good people. If you don’t wake--.”

It was then, out of nowhere, an arrow pierced through Denise’s eye. The woman stopped mid speech, and before Ava could even register what was happening, Denise became limp and fell into Daryl. The shocked man caught her, placing her on the train tracks. Ava shook away her own horror, trying to get into the mindset of defense as she took her gun out from the back of her jeans.

Through tear-filled eyes, Ava watched as a group of men came from the forest, aiming their own weapons at the pair.

“Drop them!” One of the shooters ordered.

Ava wasn’t planning to follow, but when a man with a horribly scarred face came out of the woods holding a terrified Eugene, she realized she didn’t have a choice. She looked over at Daryl, his face lit with surprise before gazing at Ava. He nodded, a silent signal to put her weapon down as he did the same. Ava gripped tighter onto her gun, wanting nothing more than to blow the man in front of her away, but something was stopping her.

It was the look in Daryl’s eyes. There was something she was missing, something he knew. Slowly, she put her gun down to her side as the leader began to speak.

“You got something to say to me?!” The scarred man called to Daryl. “Gonna clear the air?”

Ava looked over to Daryl, wanting some sort of answer, but all he did was glare. The man scoffed at Daryl’s silence before gesturing for two of his men to go forward. Ava tensed as one of the men began to pat her down, a hand lingering a bit too long on her hips.

She pursed her lips as he stripped away her knives as well as the bag of medicine she carried. It was taking everything Ava had to hold back, her only motivation to do so being the crossbow the leader held in his hands. Daryl’s crossbow; the one he lost to a couple during the herd relocation. Noticing Ava’s gaze on the weapon, the leader grinned.

“Still getting the hang of her.” He admitted as he held up the familiar weapon. “Kicks like a bitch--.”

“I should’ve done it.” Daryl sneered. “I should’ve killed you.”

“Yeah.” The man’s smile faded. “You should’ve, but instead, here we are. It begs the question: who brought this on who?”

Ava was getting sick of the conversation. It was clear this man loved to feel like he was in charge, even if he was only given a little bit of power.

“What do you want?” She interrupted his lecture.

He turned to Ava, his grin making his charred skin pull. Daryl wanted nothing more than to punch it off.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I don’t think we met.” He scanned her form. “I’m Dwight or D—whatever you want. So, what’s your name?”

Ava narrowed her eyes, not caring for his condescending tone. Or him as a person. However, she knew how men like Dwight operated. He wouldn’t give her what she wanted until he got what he demanded.

“Ava.” She answered quickly. “What the _hell_ do you want?”

“Well, Ava, it’s not what I want.” Dwight explained. “It’s what you and Daryl are going to do. You’re going to let us into your little complex, or we’ll blow Eugene’s brains out, then yours, and then his.”

Ava swallowed the lump in her throat. There was no way she was leading him to Alexandria, to their home. He didn’t just want to see it, he wanted to take stuff—maybe even people. However, being weaponless and being two against five, it seemed that they didn’t have another option. Glancing over at Daryl, his stare unwavering but lip slightly twitching, Ava knew he was having the same thought.

“I hope it doesn’t come to that, really, no one else has to die.” Dwight filled the silence before chuckling. “Honestly, this even how we usually do business, but you pricks set the tone, didn’t you?”

It was then it all clicked for Ava. They were Saviors, and they wanted revenge for the raid. How many more were out there? Did they even kill their leader?

“Is Negan here?” Ava asked, trying to stall.

“We’re all Negan, sweetheart.” Dwight grinned as he looked her up and down, and Ava couldn’t ignore the shiver that went up her spine. “But I’m sure he’d love to meet you, if you cooperate. What’s it going to be?”

He wasn’t buying the delay, but at least Ava did get a bit more information. They all saw themselves as the leader, but there was one guy who ruled it all. And it wasn’t who Rick shot.

“If you want to kill someone, you can start with our companion behind the oil barrels.” Eugene spoke, earning everyone’s attention. “He’s a first-class a-hole and deserves it so much more than us three.”

The timid man looked up at Ava and Daryl, his body shaking but eyes glistening with a promise. Ava looked over to the barrels; she knew Abraham was supposed to be with Eugene today. Luckily, Dwight took the bait and sent a few of his men over towards the cannisters. If Abe was over there, Ava hoped he had a plan.

Taking advantage of Dwight’s distraction, Eugene quickly turned around and latched his mouth onto his crouch. Dwight screamed, but the sound was soon drowned out by gunfire from the tree line, bullets taking out a few of the Saviors. Ava sprung into action herself, knocking the back of her head into the Savior’s nose behind her. The hit sent the man to the ground, and Ava was quick to retrieve her gun as well as another one from the man’s belt. She looked over to Daryl, the man slitting the throat of another Savior.

“Daryl!”

Daryl quickly turned to Ava, registering that she was passing him a gun. Catching it, he began to fire. Ava took a few shots herself as she took off. She stayed low as bullets whizzed past her, tucking and rolling behind a car.

Leaning on the hood, she caught a glimpse of Abraham in the woods, the military man firing into the clearing, unaware of the Savior approaching him from behind. Without a second to waste, Ava sent a bullet to the attacker, sending him to the ground. Abe looked at the hit before looking back at Ava, giving a small nod.

Ava kept firing, teeth clenched as she covered Eugene. Adrenaline coursed through her veins, aching to be free. She was angry; angry at the Saviors, and angry at herself for thinking they were safe. She kept her eyes on Dwight, the man now cowering on the tracks.

“Fall back!” He yelled over the gunfire. “Fall back!”

His group didn’t have to be told twice as they disappeared into the trees, running through the clearing. Ava stopped shooting, discarded her gun back in the waistband of her pants. Looking down at her hands, she saw that they were shaking. Her whole body was as her eyes burned with tears as the events played back in her mind. Denise. They needed to get her body out of here.

Daryl didn’t have the same mindset. He ran over to the tracks, picking up the crossbow that Dwight had left behind. He wanted to follow them, to end Dwight for good, but Ava couldn’t let him do that. Not now. Feeling the tears stick to her cheeks, Ava was quick to run up to him and grip his arm.

The touch made him look to her, his anger fading the moment he laid eyes on her. Ava’s determination during the gunfire was now gone, replaced with tears. Grief for her friend.  

“It’s over.” She whispered, trying to calm the panting man down. “It’s over.”

He didn’t say a word, and Ava realized there was nothing he could say. Daryl put a hand on her arm, rubbing it gently. The gesture was cut short with a yell from Abraham, his hand putting pressure on a wound Eugene was given. The pair rushed over, and Ava did her best to avert her gaze away from Denise.

She failed.

* * *

 

_Ava watched with tired eyes as Rosita and Abraham patched Eugene up. The infirmary was too quiet; the absence of Denise’s bedside manner and inappropriate jokes made the room’s air thick._

_“The bullet just grazed him.” Rosita informed the room. “The meds you got could save him from an infection.”_

_From her spot on the bar stool, Ava quietly interjected. “That’s what Denise did.”_

_Even after she was gone, Denise was still saving lives. Rosita gave a quiet nod while Abraham left to go get Rick—the leader needed to know about the ambush. Daryl peeled his gaze away from the window, walking over to Ava._

_“I’m going to bury her.” He informed. “Do you want to help?”_

_It was the first words he said to her since arriving back in Alexandria. She wanted to help, but Ava knew that seeing the woman would only make her feel worse. Her body was a reminder that she allowed this to happen. Luckily, Enid peeking through the window gave Ava an excuse._

_“I…can’t.” Ava whispered. “I’m sorry.”_

_“S’okay.”_

_Daryl left in silence, and Ava let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Glancing over to the window, she saw Enid waiting for her to come out. Ava sighed. Now came the hard part._

Night fell over Alexandria, the streets quieter than usual. Everyone heard about Denise, about the ambush. While Rick was planning, others were mourning, and Ava was comforting. She listened as Enid cried into her lap, her fingers dancing through her long brown locks. Denise was the first person her little sister trusted in the community, the one who saved her life when Aaron brought them through the gates. And Enid would never see her again.

The older sister had never felt more useless. Ava wished she could take all of Enid’s pain and put it on herself; she deserved to feel the grief. Ava was the one who pushed Daryl to let Denise come with them. The Doctor may have been ready for the walkers, but it was the people she wasn’t prepared for. The people Ava never taught her how to defend herself from.

“I just keep thinking about Tara.” Enid’s voice was quiet. “She’s going to be so upset.”

Ava’s thoughts were on Tara as well. For two whole weeks, she would think her girlfriend was at home, waiting for her with a proclamation of love. The blow was going to be brutal, but Ava was ready to be there. The least she could do was stand by the girl who stood by her.

“We’ll help her through it.” Ava reassured Enid. “Maybe we can get her to move in with us for a bit.”

Enid nodded, approving of the idea instantly. These houses were too big to live alone in, to not feel like they were closing in on you. Silence passed between the sisters, and it was Enid who broke it. 

“I thought you killed them all.”

 Enid’s voice was rough with sadness, but Ava knew she was talking about the Saviors. In retrospect, it was foolish of them to think that they took out all of them in that compound. If they hadn’t been in such a rush to get the job done, they could’ve found out more. Alexandria would have still made enemies, but Denise would be alive.

“Me too.” Ava frowned, her fingers playing with a strand of hair. “But they’re here. And mad.”

Enid turned so that the back of her head was resting on Ava’s thigh, her bloodshot eyes staring up at her older sister.

“When Rick wants to fight them, don’t go.”

The demand only slightly surprised Ava. Enid was freaked out, and she would say anything to save the life of another person.

“Enid, we’re going to need as many people as we can--.”

“Bullshit.” She interrupted. “You did your part in the compound. You can sit the next fight out.”

Enid wasn’t looking at Ava with pleading eyes, but with a glare. She knew what she was asking for was selfish, but Enid didn’t care. They were all going to die one day, but she didn’t want Ava to waste her life fighting for a cause they would never win. Rick didn’t know when to stop, but Enid did.

Ava pursed her lips. She didn’t know if she could promise such a thing, not when they didn’t know the threat. But, looking down at her sister, she could see the fear radiating off of her. She was trying to play it tough, but Ava knew she was scared. Ava knew, because she was, too. Just like Denise said. Ava nodded.

“All right.” She hoarsely promised. “No more fighting.”

Enid didn’t smile or say a word. She merely gave a nod before settling her head back on Ava’s lap, closing her tired eyes. Ava sighed, placing her hand on Enid’s head as Denise’s voice rang in her ears.

_“You’re stronger than you think you are.”_

Ava pinched the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes to fight back tears. She hoped Denise wasn’t wrong.

* * *

 

_Enid dozed off on Ava’s jean-clad lap, the older girl was gentle when lifting her head and sliding off the couch. She took a blanket from the loveseat, draping it over her little sister before giving a soft kiss to her forehead. Ava lingered over the couch, gazing down at the girl whose heart only seemed to grow with each passing day. Enid has always been strong, but she was just learning how to care for others. How to show them that she did. Ava hoped she could follow suit; for both Enid and Denise._

_Pulling a jacket over her tank top, Ava made her way to the front door. She considered leaving a note but decided it against it. Ava wouldn’t be gone long, and a note would only tempt her to stay._

The air had a slight chill to it as Ava walked down the street. If anyone was outside, she didn’t see them. She kept her eyes straight ahead; worried that if they strayed from the prize, she would lose her nerve. When she reached her destination, Ava hurried up the porch steps. She lifted her hand to knock on the door, but her first never connected with the wood.

Ava groaned. What was she so afraid of? Denise said her biggest reject was “not facing her shit.” Ava owed it to her to face hers. Without a second thought, Ava knocked on the door. The porch light above her flickered on before the door squeaked open, revealing Daryl. Like Ava, he was still in his clothes—though, come to think of it, Ava wouldn’t be surprised if he doubled his day clothes as pajamas.

Daryl’s brows furrowed in confusion, his expression one of concern as he took in Ava’s nervous appearance. It was a long day for the both, but he was hoping Ava would have found rest. He stepped out onto the porch, placing a hand on Ava’s hip. It wasn’t a touch he was used to giving, but for some reason, it felt right.   

“You all right?”

Ava didn’t have to make the choice to close the space between them, he was already halfway there. She placed her hands on his shoulders, using them to slightly lift herself up and to Daryl’s lips. The kiss was gentle, light. Ava didn’t want him to feel trapped, she wanted him to know he could break it off. The thought didn’t even occur to Daryl, the man placing his free hand on her other hip to pull Ava closer as their mouths moved slow against each other.

It was innocent. The most innocent kiss Ava had been a part of since the world ended. It made her want more, but Ava controlled herself and pulled away. She kept her hands on his shoulders, his hands on her hips as the pair collected themselves. Ava couldn’t help but grin at the wide-eyed expression on Daryl’s face, his lips opening and closing, trying to find the words.

Ava didn’t need to hear him say it. She already had the answer.

“I’m tired of being afraid.”

Daryl closed his mouth, understanding her point of view. He was tired, too. Sick of pretending that he didn’t care about her. Ava raised a brow as Daryl removed her hands from his shoulders, keeping them light in his grip as he spoke. 

“Come inside.” 

Ava bit her lip. She thought she would be able to walk away, but she didn’t anticipate Daryl to be looking at her with those eyes, twinkling in the moonlight. Ava glanced in the direction of her house; Enid was out like a light, and the night was still young enough that Ava could return before it ended to avoid questions.

“Only for a little.” Ava told Daryl and promised herself. “An hour, tops.”

 “'course.”

Ava mirrored the smile Daryl was giving her as he led her inside, and into a new chapter of her life. A chapter where fear was no longer an option.


	25. Alive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava wakes up to an empty bed.

Daryl was the first to wake up, the sunlight peeking through his curtains hitting his eyes directly. He didn’t cringe at the beams, feeling too well-rested to be bothered. For the first time since arriving in Alexandria, he had a full night’s rest, and he knew it had everything to do with the woman in his arms. He could feel Ava’s even breathing through the rise and fall of her stomach, the strap of her tank top sliding off her shoulder with each intake.

She was supposed to stay an hour, but between the conversation and kisses, the pair ended up falling asleep on top of his sheets. He knew no one would believe him when he would say nothing happened, but he didn’t care. They could think whatever they wanted because he was the one who got to wake up next to her. Daryl wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of the morning in bed with Ava, to watch her wake up with that glorious smile. But he couldn’t have that. Not until he corrected his wrongs.

He was the reason Denise was dead. If he had killed Dwight when he first met him, she would have returned home. Daryl had to end him before Dwight killed anyone else he liked, before he found Alexandria. Daryl reluctantly removed his arm from around Ava’s waist before slowly getting out of bed, trying not the dip the mattress too much in fear of waking her.  The girl trembled slightly at the missing warmth, but her lids didn’t even flutter.

Daryl pulled on his boots before writing a quick note for Ava, leaving it on his vacant pillow before silently leaving the room.

* * *

 

_“Hey,” Glenn’s eyes narrowed as Rosita made her way to the van. “We should keep numbers here.”_

_With the threat of the Saviors still at large, Maggie was anticipating an attack. They were already losing most of their experienced fighters going after Daryl, but Rosita wasn’t hearing any of it. Ava had told her where Denise died, and she knew the area well. Even more so, she saw Daryl’s face when they returned—he wanted revenge._

_“I know where Daryl’s going.”_

_The argument ceased, and Rosita took the silence as permission. Opening the door, she turned  to Maggie._

_“Ava’s going to want to know what’s going on.”_

It took Ava a moment to get her bearings, not recognizing the room around her. However, after recalling the kiss, she relaxed. She was safe—more than safe, she was happy. The night didn’t lead to sex, but it did carry a deeper form of intimacy for her. She couldn’t remember the last time she spoke so openly to a man—maybe she never did.

Daryl was different. He listened, he understood, and he gave his own experiences. She had never heard him talk for so long, and she couldn’t wait to hear his voice again. Turning away from the window, Ava frowned at the empty space beside her, the only proof that Daryl had been with her was the note on the pillow. 

**_Had to take care of something. Make sure Enid knows you’re alive._ **

 Ava’s smiled faded at the reminder of who was waiting for her back at home. Enid was probably awake by now, wondering where Ava had run off to. She wanted to avoid her little sister’s prying questions, but it seemed that they were inevitable. Ava rolled off the bed, pulling on her shoes and grabbing her jacket before taking off down the stairs and out of the house. She ignored the stares as she ran in the familiar direction; maybe Enid was sleeping in. The thought made Ava run faster, zooming past a confused Maggie.

“Ava!” The pregnant woman called. “We need to talk!”

Ava kept running. She didn’t have time to hear about a new assignment, she needed to get home.

 “I’ll find you later, I promise!”

Maggie let her go, though she didn’t have much of a choice as Ava disappeared. She bounded up the porch steps, taking a calming breath before quietly opening the door. Peering inside the house, Ava was relieved to see that Enid was still asleep on the couch; eyes closed and hair in tangles. Ava tiptoed into the house, closing the door without a sound. She was almost to the stairs, when a noise made her pause.

“Good morning.”

Keeping her hand on the banister, Ava sighed. Memories of being caught by her parents after a long night out entered her mind as Ava turned to see Enid sitting up on the couch, her chin resting on the back of the seat. A knowing smile was on her face, and Ava could tell she was enjoying this too much.

“Where were you?”

Ava crossed her arms. “Why do you need to know?”

“Well, I didn’t.” Enid shrugged. “But now that you are getting defensive, I need to know.”

Shit. Ava wanted to lie, but Enid would find out. She always did. Besides, the sisters promised to not have any secrets between them—Ava didn’t want Enid to feel betrayed. Ava made her way over to the couch, taking a seat on one of the arm rests.

 “I’ll tell you, but you have to promise not to get too excited.”

Enid didn’t say a word as she turned to face Ava, her legs crossed on the cushions. Taking a deep breath, Ava spilled the beans.

“I kissed Daryl last night.”

She stifled a laugh as Enid’s jaw dropped, her eyes lit with excitement. Enid wanted nothing more than for Ava to be happy. Although she didn’t need a man to make her content, Enid was glad that she was finally taking what she wanted.

“About time!”

Ava playfully swatted her. “None of that.”

“Sorry.” Enid laughed before turning into a grimace. “Did you guys…”

 “We only fell asleep.” Ava reassured, understanding that Enid wouldn’t want to think of her in intimacy.

Enid nodded. “Taking it slow. I like it.”

Ava rolled her eyes. She did rush things with Spencer, but that was due to her not being touched in so long. He was just a body to her, Daryl was so much more. Or, he could be. As of right now, they were just friends who kissed and fell asleep.

“Glacial speed, baby.” Ava teased before patting Enid’s leg. “You up for your shift at the inventory today? If not, I’ll cover you.”

Enid pursed her lips. She was still grieving for Denise, and would be for a long time, but she didn’t want to stay home all day. Why mope when she could keep her mind and hands occupied? She shook her head.

“Nah, I’ll be fine.” She stretched before standing up. “Mind if I shower first?”

“Go for it.”

Enid grinned as she made her way to the stairs, pausing before her trek to turn to Ava.

“This is good.”

Enid wanted Ava and Daryl to get together. However, even if they didn’t, it was good that Ava felt comfortable around him. The younger sister gave one last nod before walking up the stairs. Ava sighed, her small smile fading as she spoke to only herself. 

"I hope so."

* * *

 

_“No one else leaves.” Rick instructed the others as he followed Morgan to the car. “Everyone gets ready for a fight.”_

Enid was long gone, and Ava had just finished changing when a knock sounded at the door. Pulling her wet hair into a bun, she descended the stairs and opened the door to reveal Maggie. She grinned. She should've known Maggie would have came to her before Ava even set foot out the door. Rick may be the leader of Alexandria, but Maggie was becoming a headstrong captain herself. 

“I was just about to go looking for you.” Ava greeted, stepping to the side to let her in. “What can I help you with?”

It was then Ava noticed Maggie’s worried demeanor. She wasn’t smiling, she looked tense. Ava’s own grin faded as worry seeped through her bones.

“Daryl took off after the Saviors.” Maggie unloaded, knowing there was no easy way to say. “Glenn, Michonne, and Rosita went after him.”

Ava’s heart sank. Daryl wasn't just going after any of the Saviors, he had his eyes set on Dwight. He killed Denise, and in turn, Ava knew Daryl blamed himself for the loss. She remembered how Daryl told Dwight that he "should've" killed him on the tracks. Maybe if he did, Denise would still be alive, but Ava knew better than to think that way. They all had to deal with what happened, and this wasn't the way to go. Not yet. Ava shook her head. Daryl wanted revenge, but he wouldn’t get it. Not when he was in a rage.

“Son of a bitch.” Ava mumbled before reaching for her holster. “You think I have time to catch up?”

She needed to get to him, to stop him from killing himself and the others. They needed to deal with the Saviors--with Dwight--together.  Just as Ava was thinking of ways to convince Daryl to turn back, Maggie squashed her chances.

“The Saviors could be on their way, we need people here to defend Alexandria.” She explained. “Rick’s orders.”

Ava groaned, knowing she couldn’t talk her way out of going beyond the wall. She was one of the last people in the community that could put up a fight if the Saviors were to come knocking. She sighed, knowing the only way she could keep an eye out for the enemy and Daryl.

“You’re right.” Ava clicked her holster on. “Guess that means I’m taking Glenn’s watch.”

“You don’t need to worry about that.” Maggie shook her head. “I got it.” 

Ava placed a hand in her back pocket. She had no doubt that Maggie could protect this place, but Ava couldn’t ignore the dark circles underneath the pregnant woman’s eyes. She would never admit it, but Ava could see that she was exhausted. Ava smiled before shaking her head.

“Nope.”

Maggie’s shoulders slumped. “Ava--.”

“You need to rest up.” Ava interrupted, “For yourself and the baby.”

A ghost of a smile appeared on Maggie’s face as she rested her hand on her stomach. Seeing that she was considering it, Ava went for the kill. Placing a hand on the woman’s shoulder, Ava grinned.

“Enid’s working the inventory today, and I know she’ll smuggle you some pickles.” She gestured to the door. “Go kick your feet up.”

“Well, now that I know pickles are waiting for me…” Maggie let out a small laugh before pointing to Ava. “Only for an hour, all right?”

Ava shrugged. “We’ll make it two.”

"Ava--."

"Hey." Ava calmly interrupted. "Everyone needs a break. Let me do this for you, please?"

Ava's volunteering to guard the gate may have come from her own need, but she also wanted Maggie and the baby to be healthy. The new world may require hard work, but the early stages of pregnancy required long days of doing nothing. Besides, Maggie did more for Alexandria before noon than most of the community did before lunch. Seeing that she wasn't going to win, Maggie sighed but smiled as she squeezed Ava's shoulder.

"You're a good friend, you know that?"

Ava giggled. "I tell myself that everyday in the mirror."

Maggie playfully rolled her eyes as Ava opened the door for her, the pair walking out into the streets of Alexandria together before going their separate ways.

* * *

 

_It’s…it’s gonna go wrong out here.” Glenn was begging Daryl._

_Michonne nodded. “We’ll square it. I promise you. Just come back.”_

_Daryl looked between the pair. He was hearing everything they were saying, but he couldn’t find it in himself to agree. He kept thinking of Denise’s body, and Ava’s tearful expression. He had to finish the job—if not for himself, then for them. He shook his head, voice low._

_“I can’t.”_

_Glenn’s jaw clenched. “Daryl.”_

_“Man, I can’t!”_

_He walked away, his thoughts too consumed with vengeance to even notice the footsteps of Rosita trailing behind him._

Neither Maggie or Enid had come to visit Ava the two hours she was on guard, and she took that as a good sign. Enid cared about Maggie's well-being just as much as Ava. Knowing her little sister, she probably did all but tie Maggie to the couch to finally get her to take it easy. Maggie needed to unwind, but so did Enid. The kid was carrying the weight of the world lately. She needed a normal afternoon.

Ava’s thoughts were interrupted when a car stopped in front of the gate. She squinted in the sunlight, hoping to see the outline of Daryl or anyone else from their group, but only saw Rick. She hoped she didn't look too disappointed as she climbed down to the street, opening the gate for the leader to drive through. Once he was in, Ava closed the opening with ease. Turning around, she expected to see Carol coming out of the car, but was only greeted by Rick. Ava had only heard about Carol leaving a few hours ago, Sasha filling her in on where Rick went off to. Ava couldn't help but wonder if Daryl had known about her disappearance if he would have taken off after Dwight. She couldn't think about what could've been, all she could do was wait.

“No luck, huh?” Ava frowned.

“Morgan’s still out there looking.” Rick walked up to the gate, standing next to Ava. “Is Michonne here?”

Ava only shook her head. She had hoped the group would have dragged Daryl back by now, but there was no sight of them. Ava went through several scenarios in her head; although she favored the idea of them having car trouble, she knew it wasn’t likely. Anything could happen out there, but she prayed that the Saviors finding them first wasn’t one of those things.

“He'll be alright.” Rick reassured. "Daryl always has a way of coming back."

She looked away from the gate and to Rick, wondering how the man knew what she was thinking. Who she was thinking about. It seemed that everyone knew about Ava and Daryl—even if they didn’t have the full details, everyone had a story and was too bored with their own lives, apparently. However, Ava knew Rick had a way of knowing the truth. The two are best friends.

"I hear Michonne does, too." Ava reassured back. "Carl told me a few things about her. You guys."

 

It was Rick’s turn to appear sheepish, and Ava couldn’t help but giggle a bit. It was odd seeing Rick Grimes flustered, but it reminded her of why she was afraid to begin with. The idea of having someone in your life that could make you feel warm was dangerous. They could be taken at any moment.

“Letting someone that close,” Ava trailed off before continuing. “It’s scary. I wasn't even good at it when the dead weren't walking.”

 “Yeah.” Rick agreed but then went quiet. “But it’s what keeps us alive.”

Ava fiddled with the gun on her hip. It was cheesy, but Rick was right. Being able to love—to feel anything—was what separated them from the dead. From those who turned into monsters without dying. Ava owed it to herself to give it a shot with Daryl, and that’s what she planned to do when he returned. She followed Rick’s stare and looked beyond the gate, a small smile on her features.

“Any second now.”

Ava nodded, hoping he was right.

* * *

 

_“You’ll be all right.”_

Enid ignored the burning sensation in her lungs as she dashed through the streets of Alexandria, her booted feet hitting the concrete doing little to drown out Maggie’s screams. She was now far away from the woman’s home, but her anguish was a stab to Enid’s senses—a sound she would never forget. It all happened so quickly.

One moment she was cutting Maggie’s hair, the next the woman was on the ground, arms tight around her baby bump.

“Ava!”

Enid was relieved to see Ava already walking towards her, the girl most likely taking a break from her shift while someone covered for her. At seeing Enid's urgency, Ava broke out in a run towards her, the two almost colliding in the street but stopping due to Ava putting her hands on Enid's shoulders.

“What’s going on?” Ava quickly asked, snapping into protective mode. “You okay?”

"Not me." Enid's breathing was ragged. "Maggie and the baby. She just collapsed and I didn't know what to do..."

Ava took in her distressed sister, knowing it had to be bad. And, if it was, Maggie shouldn't be left alone. She put a gentle hand on Enid's cheek, trying to calm her down before asking her question.

“Where is she?” 

“Her house.” Enid answered. "I was cutting her hair."

Even during the dire time, Ava's heart swelled at the image of Enid cutting hair. She had only ever done it for their dad before, and that was when Ava panicked at the idea of cutting off too much--as if it mattered. She nodded, focusing on the task at hand.

"Okay, you go get Rick at the gate and I'll check on her, alright?"

Enid nodded and Ava took off running. The door to Maggie and Glenn's house was already ajar, signaling Enid's speedy getaway, and Ava could hear the screams of agony. However, that didn't prepare her for the image of seeing Maggie on the floor, her body tucked in a fetal position. Ava rushed into the house, getting on her knees as she touched Maggie's back. The woman quickly flinched.

"It's me, it's me." Ava reassured, her voice gentle. 

Maggie shook. "It hurts so bad."

"I know, I know." Ava rubbed her back. "But we gotta get you to the couch, okay?"

Maggie didn't seem exactly thrilled with the idea, but didn't argue as Ava helped get her to her feet. Each step was accompanied with a gasp of pain, and Ava found herself holding onto Maggie tighter with each painful breath. All she wanted to do was make sure she was safe, that the baby was healthy, but Ava knew that they couldn't do that in Alexandria.

The Hilltop, however, had a Doctor. And the community did owe them. 

* * *

 

After seeing Maggie's condition, Rick agreed with Ava's stance. Maggie needed the Hilltop. The drive would take a good portion of the day, but it wasn’t the length that worried Ava. It was the Saviors. They hadn’t made an appearance at Alexandria yet, which meant they were out there, waiting. She could feel it, and she knew Rick did too.  

"I'm coming with you."

Rick didn't look away from Maggie, watching with concern as Enid fluffed her pillows. Ava ignored the sharp gaze Enid sent her way, knowing she would hear all about what was held behind the stare the moment they left the house. Rick shook his head.

"I need you here."

"I wasn't asking." Ava responded sharply.

The tone made Rick look away, the man walking over to Ava with a harsh look in his eye. He kept his volume low, not wanting to add anymore stress to Maggie's already awful condition. 

"The Saviors could be on their way right now and all of my best people either MIA or sick." He reasoned. "I'm not losing more."

Ava lowered her own tone. "You and I both know they aren't coming. They're out there, and you'll need backup when they find you."

Rick ran a hand down his tired face, and it was then Ava knew she got him. He needed at least one other person with him on the journey, and Maggie wasn't going to be able to fight or even run if anything went wrong. Rick grew to trust Ava, and he saw that she was more than capable to protect herself and those around her. He nodded.

"Get some guns and ammo." He instructed. "We'll leave as soon as we can."

Ava nodded, and didn't waste a moment as she left the house and made her way to the armory. She could hear the footsteps behind her, and she even heard the sound of a voice demanding to be heard, but Ava kept walking. She had a job to do, but it seemed that Enid wanted to join in. Ava ignored her pleas as she entered the armory, grabbing a dufflebag on her way as she began to load it up with as many weapons as they needed. 

"You can't ignore me forever." Enid stood in the doorway.

"Not ignoring." Ava droned, focusing on her task. "I'm busy."

Too busy to be dealing with this. Enid wanted to stomp her foot, but she controlled herself.

“Glenn’s still not back.” She reasoned. “He would want me to be there for Maggie.”

Ava began to load ammo in her bag. “We need to keep numbers here. You’re good with a gun.”

There was also the detail that Ava didn’t want to worry about Enid on the road. In Alexandria, she would be protected, more so than being out in the open. Enid crossed her arms.

“I heard what you said to Rick." Enid pointed out. "You're right. The Saviors aren't coming here." 

"Yeah, because they're waiting for us out there!" Ava snapped, turning to face Enid. “Fine. You want the truth?” Ava asked, finally turning to face Enid. “You know what they did to Denise, what they tried to do to Maggie and Carol. I’m not putting you in that position. It’s not happening.”

Silence fell over the siblings. Ava didn't even want to think about what could happen to Enid if they ran into the Saviors. They've dealt with entitled men before, and those were men who had nothing against them. The Saviors saw Alexandria as a community that had a price to pay, and Ava knew they would do anything to get what they wanted. Including hurting the ones who meant the most to them--to Ava. Enid stepped forward, her voice quiet but hard. 

“I don't want you in that position, either." She began. "But this isn't about a fight, this is about getting Maggie to a doctor. And I can't just sit here and wait. Not this time."

 Ava kept her gaze locked on Enid's. Ava realized how tough it must have been for Enid to stay and wait for her to come back from the Compound, to not know what was happening to her or the rest of the group. She promised her that she would sit out the next fight, but this wasn't a fight at all. Enid was right. This was about getting Maggie to someone who could help her and the baby. This was Enid's fight, and she needed to be there. 

"Fine." Ava whispered, and she watched as Enid's eyes slowly widened it surprise. Ava then shoved an extra bag in Enid's chest. "Now grab some water bottles before I change my mind."

Enid accepted the bag and took off in the direction of the garage. Ava continued to load up on ammo, only pausing for a moment to close her eyes and sigh. She didn't know if bringing Enid was the right choice, but it was one she couldn't take back. Whatever was going to happen, Ava would have to live with it. They both would have to. 

* * *

 

It seemed that Ava and Enid weren't the only ones who were insistent on coming. As the pair walked out onto the street, Ava could see the familiar group piling into the RV, Aaron offering her a nod as he climbed the stairs into the vehicle. Carl was about to follow, but stopped mid climb as he took in the approaching sisters. His eye went straight to Enid.

"You're coming?" 

"Don't look so surprised." Enid scoffed. "Now move. I have water for Maggie."

Surprisingly, Carl moved out of the way, his obedience making Ava stifle a giggle. It was then he turned to Ava, a slight glare to his stare.

"You're seriously letting her go, with them out there?"

 "It was either she come with us or she would sneak out and follow." Ava adjusted the bag on her shoulder. "You know just as well as I do that when she sets her mind to something, there's no turning back."

Carl nodded, and Ava was relieved. The last thing Maggie needed was to hear teen fighting. After all, Ava was right. She wouldn't put it pass Enid to follow the RV on foot to make sure Maggie got to Hilltop--and that was even more dangerous than this trip. 

"She'll be safe." Ava reassured him. "I'll make sure of it."

"We'll make sure of it." Carl added before going into the RV. 

Ava grinned, knowing what he meant. The group has survived some amazing feats, and there was no reason why this shouldn't be any different. Ava was about to go into the RV when Spencer's voice made her pause.

"Hey, Rick." He walked up to the former officer. "If the Saviors do show up, I'm thinking...if it's not too late...should we try and make some kind of deal?"

"Tell them to wait for me." Rick responded. "I have a deal for 'em."

Ava and Spencer locked eyes, knowing that Rick's deal would end unfortunately for the Saviors. However, as Ava climbed into the RV after Rick, she couldn't help the cold feeling that settled in her stomach. 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ENID'S GONNA BE IN THE LINEUP, AYE!


	26. Grateful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The road to Hilltop suffers a few blocks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time to meet the man, ya'll.

The ride in the RV was quiet, the only sounds that seemed to carry through the vehicle being the roar of the engine and Maggie’s heavy breathing. Ava sat next to Aaron on one of the benches, her gaze focused on Enid as she lifted Maggie’s head to help her drink. Despite the circumstances, Ava couldn’t help but feel a swell of pride at seeing her little sister’s actions. When they first got to Alexandria, Enid was closed off, and Ava feared that she would never let anyone in. Now Enid was playing the part of caregiver, a willing traveler on what could be a dangerous trip just because she wanted to help someone she met a few months ago.

“She’s a good kid.”

Ava glanced over at Aaron, noticing that he was also looking into the small bedroom. Ava remembered when Enid hated Aaron, when she kept trying to tell Ava that he couldn’t be trusted. He was considered family now, and the reason Enid was alive today. Ava would never forget that.

“It’s all because of Alexandria.” Ava whispered. “If we were on the road any longer, I don’t know what she would’ve become. Thank you.”

At the last two words, Ava looked up at Aaron. She wasn’t just thanking him for Enid, but also for bringing her inside the walls. Ava knew that if she was out there any longer, she would have become the people she hated. The man grinned but shook his head.

“I just drove her through the gates.” He downplayed his role. “You did the hard part.”

After their parents died, Ava realized she couldn’t just be a sister to Enid anymore. She had to be the adult, the authority. In a way, Ava had to raise her in a world with different rules—no rules. She looked back towards Enid, the young girl now running a comforting hand through Maggie’s short locks. She smiled. If Ava could take any responsibility for turning her little sister into a strong and compassionate woman, she’d take it.

“What the bitch?”

Abraham’s colorful language made Ava and Aaron look towards the front. Abe and Sasha braced themselves as he brought the RV to a slow stop. Ava put her knee on the bench to get a good look as Rick walked up to the front. Ava’s eyes widened at the sight of eight men standing in the middle of the road, a ninth was laying on the ground, obviously injured. Ava’s stomach dropped. They had to be the Saviors, and it was clear they had a message for them.

“We doing this?” Abraham asked, looking toward Rick.

Ava looked to Rick, wondering what his answer would be. They couldn’t afford to stop and fight, not when Hilltop was still miles away. Luckily, it seemed that Rick was having the same thought as he shook his head.

“No.” He turned to the rest of the RV. “Grab a weapon, but we’re not shooting. Not yet.”

The group passed the duffle bag around, taking what they needed. As Ava checked the ammo in her pistol, she made her way to the back of the RV. Enid was no longer seated next to Maggie, but standing up, an urgent look on her face. She didn’t look scared, or even worried. Enid looked angry. Upset that someone would come in the way of their mission to help Maggie. Ava noticed that the woman’s eyes were closed, a soft whimper escaping her lips.

“You heard Rick, we’re not shooting.” She whispered, hoping Maggie wouldn’t hear. “This’ll be quick.”

“Do what you have to do.” Enid’s tone was dangerously hushed. “I’ll stay with her.”

Ava put a hand on Enid’s shoulder and squeezed, relieved that she wasn’t clamoring to fight. Enid only had one focus on her mind, and it was Maggie. And Ava wasn’t about to let the Saviors stop them.

* * *

 

_“What if it’s the last day on Earth for you, or someone you love?” The Savior called out to Rick. “Maybe you should be extra nice to those people in that RV. Be kind to each other. Like you said…like it was your last day on Earth.”_

_“You do the same.”_

Last day on Earth. The words rang in Ava’s ears as the RV backed away from the Saviors, and they echoed until they pulled over to the side of the road to get their bearings. Those words were a threat if Ava ever heard one. The Saviors weren’t done with them. They wanted to play a bit before making the kill. The thought made Ava squirm. They were supposed to be focusing on Maggie, but instead they were staring at a map, trying to figure out another route to Hilltop.

As Ava helped Sasha and Eugene with routes, Enid watched as Maggie slept. It was the first time she seemed to be in peace since going on the trip. She felt a presence behind her, and it was then a voice spoke up.

“Why didn’t you stay and help keep the place?”

Enid looked over to Carl, the boy leaning against the doorway. His expression was one of genuine curiosity. She knew he wanted her to be safe, but this wasn’t about her. It was for Maggie.

“I owe her.” Enid nodded to her. “What about you?”

“I owe them.”

It all clicked for Enid. “You want to fight the Saviors.” Carl didn’t answer, but it was all Enid needed. “Jesus. This is about helping Maggie.”

“And then what?” Carl asked. “Wait for them to come back? We need to get them first.”

The RV jerked forward, signaling that they were back driving. A few months ago, Enid would have agreed with Carl. She would have put all her focus on fighting, on surviving for herself and Ava. Now she saw the big picture. The future Maggie was carrying, and she wouldn’t let Carl’s personal vendetta get in the way.

“Don’t ruin this.” Enid whispered. “Don’t let your own need get in the way of hers.”

Carl softened slightly at her words, and Enid thought she had gotten through to him when the RV stopped suddenly. The pair of teens left the room, and Enid caught a peek through the windshield. More Saviors, a bigger group just waiting for them. She let out a shaking breath.

“We making our stand?” Sasha asked.

Carl stepped forward. “Let’s end it.”

“No!” Enid cut through his voice. “We’re not going to win, look at them.”

Carl sharply turned to Enid, but the girl only glared back. He was in such a rush to play gunfight that he didn’t even notice the large numbers in front of them. They weren’t walking out of this one alive.

“Enid’s right.” Ava nodded as she stood next to Rick. “They’re been waiting for us. They’re ready.” 

Rick nodded. “We’re going to play it our way. How we want it.” He then looked behind, giving Carl a reassuring look. “Right?”

Enid kept her gaze on Carl, waiting for his answer as well. He glanced over to her, taking in Enid’s expectant stare. There was only one right answer here.

“Right.”

Enid offered a nod of thanks before going back into Maggie’s room. As the RV backed up, she closed her eyes, trying to ignore the sounds of echoing gunshots.

* * *

 

_“We keep going. We get her there.”_

_“We will.”_

Halfway through their new route, Maggie woke up. Ava stood in the doorway, watching as Enid put a cold washcloth on her sweaty forehead. Ava pursed her lips, taking in Maggie’s paleness and rimmed eyes. She was looking worse than before, and she had no idea how fast her condition was affecting her.

“Why…do we keep stopping?” Maggie weakly asked, looking up at Ava.

Enid looked to Ava, clearly wondering how she would phase her answer. She stepped more into the room, crouching down next to Enid’s chair and in front of the bed.

“People were waiting for us, but we’re taking care of it.” Ava gently reassured. “Don’t worry.”

Enid nodded. “Rick has a plan.”

A gentle smile overtook Maggie’s lips. “He always does.”

Ava and Enid shared a meaningful look. It wasn’t exactly a lie, Rick was making plans as they went along. Ava was content on staying with the pair, but the moment was interrupted when Sasha peeked through the doorway, saying that they needed numbers. Ava nodded, and Enid put her focus back on Maggie as the older girl followed the group out of the RV.

Ava kept her gun up as she stepped off the last stair, her eyes widening in surprise at the roadblock. It wasn’t the Saviors, but walkers chained together in a sick game of red rover. From behind her, Eugene spoke up.

“Putting together a chain gang like this takes people.” He noted. “A lot of them.”

She nodded but kept her eyes on the walkers. Scanning over each of them, Ava caught a familiar sight. A sight that made her lower her gun and melt away her resolve. Embedded in one of the dead ones was arrows—Daryl’s arrows. Ava could tell from the green tips.

“Those are Daryl’s.” She spoke, not caring about her volume.

A stillness came over the group at the eerie revelation, and it was Carl who broke the silence with his own panicked words.

“That belongs to Michonne.”

Ava followed his point to see one of Michonne’s dreads hanging off a walker. The display made her sick. The Saviors had them, they caught their friends—they caught Daryl. Ava bit her quivering lip. She couldn’t cry, not yet. They could still be alive, and this could be an elaborate ruse. Rick pulled the hair out of the dead one before lifting his hatchet. However, before he could swing down, bullets began to rain down on the group.

“Get back to the RV!” Rick yelled. “Go!”

Ava and Sasha didn’t listen, the pair firing blindly into the wooded area around them as Rick began to chop away at the walkers. Ava needed to let her frustrations out somehow, and the idea of killing even one of the men who hurt Daryl was enough to soothe her soul.

“Start it up!” She heard Abraham cry.

Once Rick cleared the walkers, Ava and the group took off to the RV. Once everyone was inside, Abe sped down the dirt road. Ava took a few breaths, her eyes going to the room to see that Enid had thrown herself over Maggie. Her heart clenched at the protective nature, and she maneuvered her way to the room.

“Hey,” She put a gentle hand on her sister’s back. “It’s over.”

Enid lifted herself off Maggie, and hurriedly turned to Ava. The older girl could tell she was inspecting her body, looking for any sign of injury or struggle.

“We’re okay.” She reassured. “They were firing at our feet.”

“Then why do you look like you’ve just seen a ghost?”

Ava swallowed. For all she knew, she just had. The walker pierced with Daryl’s arrows was too rotten to be him, but that didn’t mean he was alive. That any of them were. Ava opened her mouth but stopped herself from saying the truth. She didn’t want Enid to think the worse, and she didn’t want to stress Maggie even more than she already was.

“It was a lot to take in.” She sighed. “But we’re on our way.”

Enid narrowed her eyes, but if she suspected anything, the girl kept it to herself.

“How is she?” Ava asked, gesturing down to Maggie.

Enid sighed. “High fever, and she’s only burning up more.”

“I’ll let Rick know.”

With that, Ava left the room, and the reassuring smile left her face.

* * *

 

_“There are two more routes North from here.” Sasha spoke up, her fingers on the map._

_“What’s the point?” Ava shook her head. “They’re probably waiting for us.”_

_“So, they’re ahead of us, probably behind us, but they’re not waiting on us per se.” He began. “They’re waiting on this rust bucket, and they don’t know the moment-to-moment occupancy of said rust bucket.”_

The plan was a death sentence, but it was the only one they had left. Leaving Eugene hurt Ava more than she expected, and it was then she realized that it wasn’t just because he was a friend to her. He was family. They all were.

Helping Maggie out of the RV and onto a gurney was a tough task, but soon enough they were carrying her through the woods. Night had fallen, providing both a cover for the group as well as an advantage to the enemy. Ava glanced over to Enid, her younger sister right across from her as she held onto the gurney.

“Just let me walk it.” Maggie hoarsely spoke.

Enid gave her a tight smile. “It’s just a few more miles.”

Despite her reassuring exterior, Ava could tell Enid was nervous. They all were anxious, waiting for the next thing to go wrong. They were out in the open, Enid was out in the open, and no other thought had made Ava feel so powerless. It was then it started. The whistling. The group paused, and Ava listened as the high-pitched noise echoed through the trees. She locked eyes with Enid, the girl already staring back at her.

Trapped.

“Go!”

Rick’s yell kicked them all into gear, and Ava found herself running as fast as she could with a gurney in her hands. Maybe they could find someplace to hide, but the hope was quickly squashed as a sudden light blinded Ava’s eyes, making the group come to a screeching halt. The whistling seemed to increase in volume as Ava and Enid let go of the gurney, raising their weapons to cover Rick, Abe, and Maggie.

Ava searched for an opening, but it was futile. They were surrounded. She glanced over to Enid, watching as the girl slowly lowered her weapon. She looked just as hopeless as Ava felt. She needed to get to her, to be with her younger sister, but she was frozen. Not in fear, in failure.

“Welcome to where you’re going.”

The mustached Savior walked up to them, extending his arms in greeting. None of them answered, and Ava didn’t even look in his direction. All she could do was stare at Enid, her heart sinking at her frightened face. Ava brought her out here. Ava did this to her.

“We’ll take your weapons.” The Savior slid his revolver out of his holster, pointing it at Abe. “Now.”

Rick’s panting cut through the air. “We can talk about--.”

“We’re done talking.” The Savior interrupted. “Time to listen.”

A pack of Saviors descended on the group, and Ava stared blankly ahead as they shed her form of her knives and gun. Enid handed over her gun, the only weapon she had. The man surveyed the group, a smile on his lips.

“Okay.” He nodded before gesturing to Maggie. “Let’s get her down and get you all on your knees.”

Ava watched as Rick and Abe tried to get Maggie to stand, but she was too weak. She stepped forward to help, but was quickly intercepted by someone grabbing her arm. She stifled a scream when she saw Dwight holding onto her, his eyes alight with rage and warning.

“On your knees.” He dragged her close to their RV. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

“Go to hell.” She growled.

Dwight didn’t respond, only giving Ava a hard stare as he place his hands on her shoulders and forced her on her knees. The cool dirt seeped through her jeans, the sensation giving her something to focus on as Abe kneeled next to her, Maggie and Rick following to his left.

Ava leaned forward, searching for Enid until she saw her at the far end of the line. She was shaking, her eyes wide with fear as she stared back at Ava, as if waiting for her to save the day. Do something. But they both knew better. If Ava stepped out of line, it would end even worse for their group. Instead, she did her best to send a look of reassurance, but Ava’s own shaking didn’t do much for the message.

“You got people to meet!”

It was then Ava noticed Dwight pulling out a few more bodies from the back of a van; Daryl, Glenn. Michonne, and Rosita.  They threw Michonne down next to Ava, but she barely registered the katana-wielder. Her sights were on Daryl. Daryl, who was wearing a blanket and sporting a smear of dried blood on his shoulder, looked between Ava and Enid with pure panic in his eyes. Ava could tell that he was trying to figure out how the Saviors got to them. She had never seen him look so helpless, and Ava could only guess that she was mirroring the expression.

“All right!” The Savior cheered. “We got a full boat. Let’s meet the man.”

He walked backwards towards their RV before placing two knocks on the door. Ava’s breath caught in her throat as a man stepped out of the vehicle, dawning a leather jacket and a scarf as red as blood around his neck. Dangerous. That was the word that seemed to scream in Ava’s mind.

“Pissin’ our pants, yet?” His voice was smooth as he sauntered into the light. “Boy, do I have a feelin’ we’re getting close.”

No one said a word, even Maggie’s whimpers seemed to go silent. Ava kept her eyes locked on him as he approached the lineup, scanning each of them in his mind. She swallowed a gasp as he stopped near Enid, praying that he wouldn’t breath in her direction. Enid tensed, the only feeling she was aware of being Carl's hand wrapping around her own.

“Yup. Gonna be pee-pee pants city here, real soon.” He lifted a finger, going over each person. “Which one of you pricks is the leader?”

The mustached Savior pointed Rick out to the man, and Ava closed her eyes in relief as he walked away from Enid. He stopped in front of Rick, tilting his head in interest.

“Hi. You’re Rick, right?” He wasn’t waiting for an answer. “I’m Negan.”

_“We’re all Negan, sweetheart.”_

Dwight’s words echoed in Ava’s mind as a shiver ran down her spine. They are all Negan, but the man who was all but chastising Rick for killing his men was the leader. No wonder why they fell in line; Negan carried himself with an air of intimidation. He knew what to do to get what he wanted, what buttons needed to be pushed to get his desired result.

“Give me your shit, or I will kill you.”

Ava swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. Negan wanted their supplies, items they were already low on to begin with. Alexandria was in no position to do such a thing—that’s how they got in this situation, killing for a cow. However, Ava found herself wanting Rick to agree to the terms. Anything for them to get up and go home.

“You understand?” Negan leaned down towards Rick. “What? No answer?” He mocked before stepping backwards. “You don’t really think that you were gonna get through this without being punished, now. Did you? I don’t wanna kill you people, I just wanna make that clear from the get-go. I want you to work for me and you can’t do that if you’re fuckin’ dead now, can you?”

Silence answered him. No one dared to move as a whooshing sound filled the air. Ava looked over, her breath catching in her throat at the sight of a baseball bat covered in barbed wire. Her stomach twisted as the realization hit her: public execution.

“This is Lucille.” He spoke slowly, but excitement was an undertone. “And. She. Is. Awesome. All this just so we can pick out which one of you gets the honor.”

He walked away from Rick, meandering down the line with interest. Ava averted her eyes when Negan made his way towards her, knowing that she would burst into tears the moment they locked eyes. He paused in front of Abraham, rubbing his beard.

“I gotta shave this shit.” He hummed before walking in the opposite direction.

Ava’s relief was short lived as she watched Negan go back towards Carl and Enid. She let out a shaky breath as Negan kneeled in front of Carl, and it was then she felt a hand on top of hers. Ava looked over to see Michonne holding onto her pale hand, sending her a look of comfort and warning; Michonne was worried, but knew that they couldn’t do anything without getting everyone killed. Ava seemed to accept the message, and reluctantly continued to watch.

 Carl was quick to remove his hand from Enid’s as Negan reached him. The last thing the boy wanted was for Enid to attract his attention.

“You got one of our guns.” Negan studied Carl’s determined face before smirking. “Shit, kid. Lighten up. At least cry a little. Your little buddy here has the right idea.”

Negan nodded towards Enid, who’s eyes were full of unfallen tears. She wanted this to be over, for Maggie to be at Hilltop. Hell, Enid wanted the power to go back in time. Anything to get them out of this situation. Her heart stopped as Negan turned towards her, a faux expression of sympathy on his face.

“Oh, honey.” He cooed, making Enid want to vomit. “It’ll all be over soon.”

Ava glared as he spun the bat in his hand, taunting the girl in front of him. Ava was ready to risk it all, she didn’t care if she got a bat to the head, if he stopped talking to Enid. Negan chuckled as he stood up, belting Carl’s gun in his pants. He cleared his throat as he walked down the line, stopping in front of Maggie.

“Jesus. You look shitty.” He lifted the bat. “I should just put you out of your misery right now...”

“NO!”

Glenn jumped towards Maggie, only to be stopped by three Saviors who dragged him back to his spot. Ava’s body grew cold as she watched Negan huff a laugh at Glenn’s pain, the husband still calling for the safety of his sick wife. It was all a game to Negan.

“Don’t any of you do that again, I will shut that shit down, no exceptions.” He warned to the group before looking down at Rick. “Sucks don’t it? The moment you realize you don’t know shit.”

He ran his gaze up and down the line, stopping once again at Carl’s death glare. Ava’s heart sunk as a feral smile played at his features.

“This is your kid, right?” He asked, pointing the bat at Carl as he taunted Rick with a laugh. “Oh, this is definitely your kid!”

“Stop this!”

Even with his head bowed, Rick’s shout sent a clear message. However, Negan was having none of it as his booming voice overpowered him.  

“Do not make me kill the little future serial killer, don’t make it easy on me.” He drawled. “Everybody’s at the table, waiting for me to order.”

Negan started to whistle the familiar tune that Ava was sure would haunt her nightmares for years to come—if she lived through the night. Enid’s nerves shattered at the sound, and she knew her fear was visible when she felt Carl hold her hand once more.

“I simply cannot decide.” Negan chuckled again before extending his arms in delight. “I got an idea.” He walked forward, stopping in front of Rick as he pointed the bat to his head. “Eenie.”

Ava’s jaw unhinged, and she was sure she was going to vomit on the spot as Negan went down the line, singing the childish tune. He had their lives in his hand, he was juggling them with glee.  He continued down the line, pointing the bat at them with each word, only lingering once. In front of Ava.

“…let him go.”

Enid gasped silently as Ava looked up at Negan, the man looking down at her with narrowed eyes and a small smirk. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but Enid knew it was nothing good. She let out a breath as he moved past Ava, the older girl closing her eyes in both horror and relief as he continued the tune.

“…And you…are…it.”

The rhyme stopped and Ava opened her eyes, slowly inhaling the night air when she saw Negan so close to her. However, he wasn’t in front of Ava. It was Abraham. The man who saved her from Dwight, the one who would do anything to defend Alexandria and the people within it. This brave man was going to die by the hands of a psychopath, and all she could do was watch. 

“Anybody moves, anybody says anything, cut the boy’s other eye out and feed it to his father and then we’ll start.” Negan ordered, his eyes on Abraham, who looked almost too calm. “You can breathe, you can blink, you can cry…hell, you’re all going to be doing that!”

Before Ava could prepare herself, Negan brought the bat down on Abe’s head, sending him down to the gravel. She could hear Sasha and Rosita’s screams, Maggie’s whimpers, but Ava couldn’t movie. All she could do was stare in horror as Abe attempted to get up. Negan let out a laugh.

“Look. At. That!” He exclaimed. “Takin’ it like a champ!”

"Suck…my…nuts.” Abe breathed out, his tone heavy with pain.

Negan let out a growl before bringing the bat back down on Abraham. Again. And again. Hot tears ran down Ava’s cheeks, and it was then she realized she was crying. She found the strength to avert her gaze from the brutality, focusing on Enid across the way. Her heart shattered when she saw her little sister, the girl’s eyes wide with fright as she, too, seemed to be hypnotized by the gore. Ava dug her hands I the dirt, trying to anchor herself down to the Earth. Anything to stop her from running to Enid.

The hitting ceased, and Negan was back to his spiel, but Ava wasn’t listening. She didn’t even flinch when she felt a liquid hit her cheek—blood that wasn’t hers. Negan already gave his message, and Ava heard it loud and clear. They couldn’t save Abraham, but maybe they could spare everyone else if they fell in line. The horror was over, and it would never have to happen again.

At least, that’s what Ava thought until Daryl let out a growl before striking Negan in the face.  

 


	27. The Day Will Come When You Won't Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava and the group learn how Negan operates.

Ava's body rocked towards Daryl, wanting nothing more than to help him. A grip on her bicep made her freeze. Michonne sent her a horrified stare, trying to silently communicate that Ava’s intervention would only make things worse. However, Ava knew the worst part was that she knew Michonne was right. All Ava could do was lean back and watch through watering eyes as Daryl was forced to the ground by a group of Saviors.

“THAT…is a no-no.” Negan crouched next to Daryl, his eyes focused on Rick. “That whole thing…not one bit of that shit flies here!”

A shiver ran down Ava’s spine as Negan spun his bat in front of Daryl, as if taunting him with the promise of death. She was worried for Daryl, but a small part of Ava was angry as well. All he had to do was sit down and stay quiet, but he let his emotions get the best of him. Dwight advanced to the middle of the circle, the familiar crossbow in his hands as he aimed it at Daryl’s head.

“You want me to do it?” Dwight asked, “Right here?”

Ava’s lip quivered. She couldn’t lose another person tonight, but she especially couldn’t lose Daryl. Not when she just got him back, not when there was so much left for them to do. Negan grabbed onto Daryl’s hair, surveying the overpowered man as he growled.

“Nah, you don’t kill that.” Negan smirked up at the blonde man. “Not until you try a little.”

Ava didn’t miss Negan’s unsettling smile and dark tone, but she still felt relief as Dwight pulled Daryl back to his spot in line. He huffed and looked ready to go in for round two when he caught sight of Ava. She stared at him, her eyes soft but sparkling with fear. The woman had been through so much, and the last thing Daryl wanted was to be the cause of anymore stress. So, for the first time in his life, Daryl stayed down.

“Anyway, that’s not how it works.” Negan addressed the crowd as he stood up. “Now, I already told you people, first one’s free, then what did I say? I said I would shut that shit down! No exceptions.”

Every warning signal in Ava’s mind went off as Negan walked to the end of the line, a wicked smile on his face.

“Now, I don’t know what kind of lying assholes you’ve been dealing with; but I’m a man of my word.” Negan spoke as if he was a man of nobility. “First impressions are important. I need you to know me. So!”

He lifted the bat, a quizzical look on his face. “Back to it!”

With that, Negan turned with a flourish and brought Lucille down on the head of an unsuspecting Glenn. Ava opened her mouth in as silent scream as Maggie let out a yell of horror. Daryl cowered in fear, his jaw unhinged, shocked by the brutality in front of him. The brutality he caused.

When Negan hit Glenn again, the unmistakable wail of Enid reached Ava’s ears. The older girl turned away from the brutality in favor of checking on her sister. Ava’s heart sank when she saw Enid with her head in her hands, trying to block the sight of the massacre of the man who saved her life. Who brought her back to Alexandria—to Ava. She still cringed with each hit.

The sounds were always the worst part.

“I am sorry. I truly am.” Negan’s tone held no sympathy as he gave a small smile. “But I did say it. No exceptions!”

 Negan went back to destroying Glenn’s skull, his body seizing. The only sound besides the bat was the sound of Maggie and Enid’s cries, and Ava wanted nothing more than to comfort them. But she couldn’t. All she could do was watch as Glenn became unrecognizable. Glenn, the first person from Alexandria to trust Ava. The one who brought Enid home. The one who was going to be a father.

He was now nothing more than a pile of flesh in the ground.

“You bunch of pussies. I’m just getting started.” Negan growled as he brought the bat down one more time. “Lucille is thirsty. She’s a vampire bat!”

He chuckled, the sound a stark contrast from the sobs filling the air. Ava’s body was shaking, and she couldn’t bring herself to look at the pulp that was once Glenn and Abraham. Her eyes stayed focus on the dirt below her, mentally counting to ten as Negan strolled up to Rick.

“Was the joke that bad?”

* * *

 

_“I’ll be right back, maybe Rick will be with me.” Negan dragged Rick to the RV. “If not, well, we can just turn these inside-out, won’t we? I mean, the ones that are left.”_

The group stayed on their knees for the entire night. The Saviors weren’t ones to bend the rules. As the sun finally began to rise, Ava felt exhaustion hit her. She fought to keep her eyes open, her orbs still focused on the ground. No one dared to make eye contact, afraid that the Saviors would see it as a challenge—or an act that warranted another punishment. Every few moments, Ava could feel a pair of eyes on her. Daryl’s gaze. All she wanted to do was hold him, to bring herself back to reality.

Enid and Maggie cried, the younger girl comforted by Carl rubbing soothing circles on her back. The motion did little to soothe Enid. Her mind kept replaying Glenn’s demise. She would never forget it.   

The sound of the RV’s engine made everyone look up. Ava jumped when the door opened, Rick falling out of the vehicle. Before he could get to his feet, Negan stepped out and dragged him to the middle of the front of the line. Rick looked traumatized, but Ava could see the fire in his eyes. He wanted to fight back. Sadly, Negan saw the same.

“You’re still looking at me the same damn way.” Negan shook his head. “Like I shit in your scrambled eggs and that’s not going to work! Do I give you another chance?”

“Yes.” Rick breathed, his voice heavy,

Ava’s jaw clenched as Negan ordered his men to aim their guns at their heads. She felt the barrel of a rifle hover over her hair, but she wasn’t afraid for her life. No, she was afraid for Enid’s, the young girl’s eyes bloodshot as she stared right back at Ava. She thought this was it for them, but Ava knew better. Shooting them in the back of the head was brutal, but not as cruel as Negan was. This wouldn’t send his desired message to Rick.

“Kid.” Negan pointed to the ground in front of him. “Now.”

But using Carl would. 

Enid watched helplessly as Carl stood to his feet and walked towards Negan. For all she knew, this would be the last time she saw him alive. Negan forced him to the ground, using a pen to draw a thick line on his arm—Enid resisted the urge to scream. Negan was going to cut his arm off.  Rick caught on as well, begging the man not to do it.

“Me? I’m not doing shit.” Negan smirked before standing up. “Rick, I want you to take your axe and cut your son’s left arm off.”

 Ava’s eyes went wide. Negan gave the order as if he was asking Rick to do a simple chore. The man was sick, but he knew how to get what he wanted as Ava watched Rick break right before her eyes. The leader wailed, sobs escaping his throat as he lifted the axe in the air. Enid closed her eyes, but the action never reached her ears. Slowly opening her eyes, Enid scowled when she saw Negan crouched next to Rick, a grin on his face.

“That’s the look I wanted to see!”

Ava couldn’t find the strength to feel relief. She was numb, unable to even feel the throbbing pain in her knees from kneeling all night. Ava wasn’t even upset when she head Rick proclaim that they would all provide for Negan. She didn’t listen as Negan welcomed them to their new lives—a life of serving him and his community. Ava understood. If they wanted to live, they needed to keep this man happy. 

“Dwight!” Negan called before pointing to Daryl with the axe. “Load him up.”

Her head whipped towards Daryl, a sob escaping her throat as she watched Dwight force him up. She thought he was safe, that the punishment was over, but Negan had other plans. Ava reached for Daryl, and she swore he reached back, but they both knew it was no use as Dwight threw him in the back of a van. Ava kept her gaze on him, wanting to memorize every feature of him. He stared back, and Ava wondered if he was doing the same. 

They kept their eyes locked until the doors closed. 

* * *

 

_“We’ll be back for our first offer in one week.” Negan walked away, tossing the axe behind him. “Until then, ta-ta!”_

The group sat in silence as the Saviors dispersed around them. Ava brought her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs as she rested her chin on top. Silent tears rolled down her face. She glanced over at Enid, her once vibrant sister now staring off into nothing, trying to register what all just happened. Ava didn’t blame her. Everything fell apart so quickly—their lives completely changed within a few hours. Glenn and Abraham were dead. Daryl was taken. Rick was broken.

And Ava? Ava felt as if a part of her died as well. She felt weak, as if any movement would make her crack. She would be content staying in this spot forever, to waste away. But Maggie had other plans as the sick girl rose to her feet.

“Maggie, you need to sit down.”

Rick slowly stood up, walking towards the woman as she moved towards Glenn.

“No.” She spoke. “You need to get ready to fight them.”

Enid glanced up at Maggie’s words. She was right—they all knew she was. However, when Enid looked around at the group, she knew they were in no condition to fight. Hell, Negan has an army. Alexandria could never measure up to that. Enid sighed. This was their new life.

“I can’t have you all out here anymore.” Maggie’s words were broken apart by sobs. “I need you all to go back.”

Ava pursed her lips as she stood up. Maggie blamed herself—she was the reason they were out here—but Ava knew it was a moot point. Negan would’ve found them, eventually. She walked over to the pregnant woman, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“We’re not leaving you out here.” Ava whispered. “We made this choice.”

 “You have to.” Maggie breathed.

Michonne shook her head. “It’s not going to happen.”

“I’m taking her.” Sasha was the voice of reason. “I’ll keep her safe.”

Ava nodded. It was the only choice that would make Maggie go.

“Me too.”

Everyone turned to Enid, Ava’s heart racing when she saw her little sister standing up in her spot. Enid was with Maggie the entire ride from Alexandria to Hilltop—this was her mission, and she felt that it wasn’t completed yet. Ava wanted Enid to be happy, but she couldn’t ignore the fear swirling in the pit of her stomach. She wanted Enid to come home with her. It may be a selfish move, but Ava didn’t care. She couldn’t have Enid out here, not anymore.

“No.” Was the only word Ava could say.

Enid stepped forward. “You know I can protect myself.”

“With what weapon?” Ava asked, recalling how the Saviors stripped them.

Enid opened her mouth, and Ava crossed her arms, wondering what answer she came up with. However, she never found out as Maggie interrupted.

“I can’t have you out here anymore.” Her voice was heavy with emotion. “You and Ava need to stick together. You all do.”

Fresh tears ran down Ava’s cheeks as she watched Maggie sink to her knees next to Glenn. This was a woman who lost everything, and who didn’t want anyone to feel the way she did. Maggie didn’t want Ava to lose it all, either. Enid softened at the scene, her own lip quivering as she nodded.

“Okay, Maggie.” She spoke softly. “We’ll go home.”

Home. The word echoed in Ava’s mind as Maggie sobbed into her shoulder, Enid holding her hand in support. Ava watched as the others hauled the corpses away and wondered if their ‘home’ would ever be the same.

* * *

 

It was late afternoon by the time the group arrived back in Alexandria, Gabriel’s smile fading the moment he got a good look at all of them. Ava and Enid didn’t say a word as they walked out of the RV and made a beeline to their house, Rick staying behind to speak to the Priest. Ava was glad she wasn’t the leader, it meant she didn’t have to explain herself or the situation they were now in. Rick wanted to call a meeting, to tell the community about their new circumstances.

Luckily, he was letting those present at the lineup skip it. If he hadn’t given the allowance, Ava still wouldn’t go. All she wanted to do was go home, shower, and be there for Enid. Her sister who hadn’t spoken a word since they left the clearing. Ava wasn’t pushing Enid to speak—Ava wasn’t exactly ready to talk about the night either.

“You can shower first.” Enid broke the silence once they got home.

Ava shook her head. “You should-”

“You were right next to them.” Enid interrupted, her voice shaking. “You…wash them off of you.”

Ava stepped forward. She didn’t speak, only kissing Enid’s forehead before walking up the stairs. Entering the bathroom, Ava caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and she almost started sobbing all over again. Her face was speckled with blood, her hair sticking to her forehead. Blood caked her clothes too, and Ava was quick to rip them off. She made a mental note to throw them away.

She let out a shaky breath. No wonder why Enid wanted her to go first. Ava practically smelled like death.

Ava closed her eyes as the hot water washed over her. It did little to comfort her, and Ava kept the shower short as she got out and dried herself off. The hot water washed over her but did little to comfort. Ava didn’t stay in their long as she got out and dried herself off, slipping into a t-shirt and shorts.

When she stepped out of the bathroom, the sound of sobs reached her ears.

“Enid?”

The question sounded more like a statement of concern as Ava maneuvered her way around the upstairs. Ava was surprised to find the source coming from her own bedroom, and her heart shattered at the image of Enid curled in a ball. She laid over the covers, her back towards the door as she stared out the window, a few more cries escaping her throat.

Ava sighed as she walked into the room. She sat at the edge of the bed, placing a comforting hand on Enid’s back.

“Do you want to talk about…”

“No.”

“Me either.”

Ava scooted onto the bed, laying down next to Enid with a soft exhale. Enid turned until she was on her back. The pair didn’t look at one another, or even touch. They just stared up at the ceiling, wondering how they got here. After a few moments of silence, Enid asked the question that was no doubt nipping at everyone’s mind.

“What are we going to do?”

Ava blinked. If Enid were to ask this a mere few days ago, she would’ve told her sister that they were going to live. That they weren’t going to just get through the days, they were going to enjoy them. However, with the Saviors putting them on the payroll, Ava realized they would no longer have that chance. Each day would be about providing—for Negan. Ava’s lip quivered.

“Survive.”

It was all they could do, but not today. Tonight, the sisters would lay in bed and say goodbye. Goodbye to the friends they lost, for Maggie, for Daryl.

For the life they were just beginning to love.

* * *

 

When Ava woke up, the room was dark, the small source of light filtering in through the curtains being the moon. From the headache forming behind her eyes, Ava knew her body needed more sleep. However, she knew she wouldn’t be getting any more of it tonight, the reminder of what happened filling her bones with an odd source of adrenaline. Luckily, Enid was still fast asleep, her chest rising and falling evenly. She looked peaceful, and Ava wished she could take a picture, knowing this would be the only time she worse such an expression.

Instead, Ava did her best not to disturb Enid as she got out of bed and made her way out of the room.   She didn’t bother turning on a light as she went to the kitchen, opening the fridge to reveal a bottle of wine—a bottle Denise had left at the house and had promised to pick it up.

Denise always forgot things.

Ava took the half empty bottle and made her way out to the porch. The streets were empty, the lights now dimmed just enough for someone walking to see. The night air was cool, perfect even. It all felt like a sick joke to Ava as she slumped on the porch steps, taking the lid off the bottle before taking a long swig.

She stared off into the night, waiting for him to come.

He never did. Ava finished the bottle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title of 7x01 was just too good to change. 
> 
> Also wanted to say thank you for all your sweet comments! I'm so glad you guys were happy to see Enid at the lineup, especially since this coming portion of the story (Negan/All Out War) is a bit more canon divergence! 
> 
> I hope you guys had a Happy Easter/Passover! If you don't celebrate, then I hope you had a good weekend!


	28. After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group returns to Alexandria.

_“Whatever he’s done to you, there’s more.” Sherry’s tone dripped with warning. “You won’t get away, and when you’re back? It’ll be worse.”_

_Daryl scanned her expression, trying to figure out if it was a trick. Even if she was lying, Daryl knew Sherry was right. Negan would find a way to hurt him if he got caught. But he was so close to getting out. He had to try._

_God, he had to try._

It took Enid a moment to get her bearings when she woke up the next day. She knew she was Ava’s room, but her mind was still in a fog. The events of the day still felt like an odd nightmare, however, the dirt and grime that stuck to her clothes and skin was a reminder that it was all too real. Glenn and Abraham were slaughtered, Daryl was taken away, and all Enid could do was watch. And cry.

Enid was ashamed of how weak she was during the events. She wanted to go to Hilltop to help Maggie, but there was also a small part of her that wanted to go just for the sake of proving to herself—and Ava—that she was more than a puddle of tears. But Ava wanted her home. Ironic considering Enid had woken up alone. 

She wasn’t surprised that Ava was up and out so early. Enid new her big sister—and Ava would want to keep herself busy rather than think about the deaths and Daryl. On the other hand, Enid would be content spending the day sleeping, but she knew that couldn’t happen. Everyone in Alexandria had jobs to do, and Enid was no exception.

Slowly, Enid rolled out of bed and made her way to the bathroom, ready to get the stench of the day before off her skin. She scrubbed until her skin was raw, but she still felt as if something was there.

Enid had to get it off.

* * *

 

_“You got your friend killed. Don’t pretend like you don’t know the score.”_

_Daryl couldn’t hold his anger as he picked up the sandwich and flung it at Dwight. The scarred face man braced for a charge, but it never came as Daryl stayed seated. He already got beaten up once today, and he would need his strength later._

_“You should be dead, but Negan’s taken a shine to you.” Dwight crouched down. “You’re lucky. Don’t forget it.”_

_As Dwight taped a photo of what was left of Glenn on the wall, leaving Daryl to contemplate how his actions ended a member of his family, Daryl felt anything but lucky._

With Sasha at Hilltop, there was an opening for the early morning to afternoon shift, and Ava was the first to volunteer. She ignored the throbbing pain in her head that came with a wine hangover as she stood at the gate’s scaffolding, keeping her gaze out to the streets beyond the wall. In the distance, she spotted a body staggering their way towards her. Ava’s heart rate began to increase with hope however, after looking through the scope, she realized it was only a dead one.

Ava’s shoulders slumped in disappointment. It was a strange sense of déjà vu to the young woman, waiting for a loved one to return. She should’ve known better than to think Daryl would stroll up to Alexandria. Ava didn’t know if he was even still alive. That thought alone made her choke on air; to let out the frustration, she aimed her rifle at the walker and fired, watching it fall to the ground.

“Nice shot.”

Ava was trapped in her own mind that she didn’t even hear Rosita make her way up the ladder, her own gun strapped to her back as she surveyed Ava’s stance. Despite the compliment, her voice was deprived of any emotion. Ava couldn’t blame her—Rosita watched her ex-boyfriend get beaten to death, and then was mocked by the murderer. In Ava’s eyes, Rosita could act anyway she wanted.

“Thanks.” Ava gave a small smile. “Your shift isn’t for another three hours.”

“I know.” Rosita nodded. “I just…couldn’t sleep.”

Ava didn’t speak, only nodding in silence. She knew why Rosita was here, it was the same reason she was. They needed to focus on something that wasn’t the people they lost. Ava stepped to the side, giving Rosita more room to stand. A comfortable silence fell between the pair, and a moment passed before Rosita spoke up.

“I’m sorry.” The words were rushed, uncomfortable on her tongue.

Ava blinked, confused about the apology. Before she could ask, Rosita began speaking once more.

“Daryl punched Negan because of me.” She shook her head. “Because I couldn’t…handle it.”

Ava shook her head. She didn’t want to hear this, she didn’t want to think about what could’ve been differently. It was too late.

“You don’t need to apologize.” She reassured. “The only person to blame is Negan.”

Rosita didn’t move. “We can take him out.”

“Excuse me?”

“Negan.” Rosita elaborated, turning to face Ava. “He said he’s coming back in a week. You can go high and put a bullet between his eyes before he even makes it up to the gate.”

As much as Ava wished it was that easy, she knew better. If the lineup taught the group anything about Negan, it was that he never traveled alone. Even if Ava improved her shot, killing Negan would only result in a fight with his men—and Alexandria was far from ready for a war. Rosita stared at Ava, waiting for her response to the plan. She was hurt, she wanted revenge, and Ava didn’t blame her. But it just wasn’t the time. Not yet.

“You know it’s not that simple, Rosita.” Ava’s tone was soft. “It’ll just lead to a bigger fight that we’re not ready for.”

By the clench in Rosita’s jaw, it was clear Ava’s answer wasn’t the right one. At least, not in Rosita’s mind. It was then Ava was reminded that Rosita was the type of person to get things done for herself if no one would help her—and that worried Ava.

“When he comes, don’t try anything.” Ava warned, her words heavy. “We can’t lose any more people.”

Silence. Ava narrowed her eyes.

“Rosita.”

“I won’t.” Rosita responded quickly before sending a glare towards Ava, “Are you happy?”

Rosita didn’t wait for an answer as she adjusted the gun in her hands, settling her gaze on the outside world. Ava simply rolled her eyes. She had bigger things to worry about than staying on Rosita’s good side.

“Ecstatic.”

* * *

 

_“I get why you did it, why you took it.” Daryl’s voice was rough from lack of use. “You were thinking about someone else. That’s why I can’t.”_

_And yet, as Dwight closed the cell door, all Daryl could see was her face._

To say that Ava was relieved to get off guard duty was an understatement. She originally went up there to distract herself, but after the conversation with Rosita, all she could think about were plans. They couldn’t act now, not when they were at their weakest, but it made Ava wonder when they would be ready to fight. Would it be months? Years? Ava didn’t know the answer, but she knew someone who would.

After returning her weapon to the armory, Ava trekked towards Rick’s house. Her determination faltered when she saw Enid sitting on his porch, Carl next to her as they played what looked to be a matching game with Judith. Looking at the sight, Ava couldn’t help the small smile that crept up her lips. It was good to see them together again, even if it was from the result of tragedy. She made her way up the steps, the sound making the two teens look up at Ava. Even Judith raised her hands towards her.

“Hey Ava,” Carl nodded. “How was guard duty?”

“Boring.” Ava forced a small grin as she looked between the pair. “What did you guys do today?”

“Inventory.” Enid answered, her eyes still focused on the cards lining the deck. “Olivia let me take a frozen pizza.”

Ava stifled an exhale, relieved that Enid didn’t spend her entire day inside the house.  Ava rested a comforting hand on Enid’s head, the touch making the girl look up to her. Ava sent her a questioning stare.

“You good?”

 Enid pursed her lips. “Yep.”

 The clipped response was enough for Ava to realize that Enid wasn’t going to talk about it. Especially in front of Carl. She gave a small nod.  

“I’ll whip up that pizza when I get home.” Ava changed the subject. “You’re welcome to join us for dinner, Carl.”

“I should probably stick around here.”

Carl wanted to be with his family, and Ava knew the feeling. She wanted to be close to Enid, but she needed to finish this first. After Carl told Ava that she could go right in, the woman entered the house. She could see Rick standing in the kitchen, his back towards her.

 He wasn’t cooking or doing much of anything. He just stood there, his hands braced on the countertop. Ava considered walking out, and she was about to when her boot made the wooden floor creak, earning Rick’s attention as he turned towards her. He looked ready to fight, but the expression melted away when he saw who it was.

“Uh,” Ava gave an awkward wave. “Hi.”

“I didn’t hear you come in.”

“Yeah, sorry.” Ava stepped forward. “Carl told me I could.”

“It’s fine.” Rick’s eyes seemed to soften as he made his way out of the kitchen. “What can I do for ya?”

Ava opened her mouth, but she couldn’t find herself to ask the question that Rosita implanted in her mind. She couldn’t ask it _because_ of Rick. She took in his tired eyes, the dark circles underneath them looking even deeper than before. His hair was reminiscent of someone who just rolled out of bed. Ava swallowed. He was broken, just like the rest of them.

“I just wanted to say that…” Ava cleared her throat. “That I have your back. Whatever you decide to do, I have your back.”

At first, Rick didn’t say anything. He just stared at Ava, and the woman had never felt more exposed. He walked towards her, and before Ava could think of defending her words, Rick had her wrapped in a hug. It was unexpected, but Ava went with it as she hugged him back. Rick’s broken voice cut through the silence.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save him.”

Ava didn’t need him to elaborate. Instead, she tightened her grip and allowed a few stray tears to fall as Rick rubbed her back in comfort.

* * *

 

_Light flooded the dark room, too much light for Daryl to adjust to. However, he could make out the silhouette standing in the doorway, his shadow looming with intimidation as he spun that damn bat in his hand._

_“Rise and shine!” His voice was smooth, but giddy with excitement. “It’s field trip day, Daryl!”_

“Guard duty again?”

The next morning, Enid sat on the couch, cereal bowl on her lap as she watched Ava put her hair up. The younger girl noticed that Ava was picking up shifts—not only did she pull gate duty yesterday morning, but she picked up a watch after dinner last night. Enid understood the need to feel busy, she just hoped Ava was getting more sleep than she looked like she was.  

“Eugene wants a go at guarding the gate, so I’m going to teach him a few tricks.” Ava slid her knife onto her hip. “You know, like a training day.”

“Thrilling.”

Ava put on an expression of offense. “What are you doing that’s so great today, huh?”

“Helping Carl in the infirmary.” Enid beamed.

Ava stifled a grin. She was more than pleased that Enid was hanging out with Carl. Whatever happened between the two before the trip to Hilltop was long forgotten.

“Wow, you got me beat.” Ava rolled her eyes, tone dripping with sarcasm as she squeezed Enid’s shoulder. “I’ll see you later.”

Enid gave a wave and Ava made her way outside. It was still early enough that not a lot of people were out yet, though Michonne did giver her a nod as she made her way out the opposite way. The woman had a rifle on her back, and Ava hoped that meant she was going hunting. They were low on food, and all the usual scavenging places looked to be cleared out. Not starving yet but getting there.

 After retrieving a gun for herself, Ava went to the gate, surprised to see Eugene already sitting on a nearby curb, a piece of technology on a small tray in front of him.

“What’s that?” Ava asked as she walked closer.

Eugene looked up. “Well, good morning to you, Ava.”

“Good morning.” Ava didn’t miss his hint for a ‘hello,’ but she still needed an answer. “What is that? It’s definitely not a gun.”

Eugene was supposed to be learning how to be a better gatekeeper, and he couldn’t do that if he didn’t even try. Before he could answer, the sound of a car screeching to a halt made Ava turn around. Rosita was behind the wheel with Spencer in the passenger seat. Ava noticed that the pair were getting closer, and from the way Spencer seemed to be avoiding her gaze, she had a feeling it was more than friendship. As if she cared. All Spencer was to her was a few romps in the sheets.

“Can you open the gate?” Rosita asked curtly.

Ava adjusted the gun in her hands. “Where are you heading?”

“We’re going to find something for when they come.” It was Spencer who answered.

“You want to keep Negan happy, right?” Rosita quickly added, her glare settling on Ava.

Ava bit the inside of her cheek. She knew Rosita would be mad at her for rejecting her plan—or lack of. However, the last thing she needed was for Rosita to think that she was giving up. Ava wanted to strike back, but it wasn’t the time. Seeing Rick yesterday only confirmed her stance.

“For now, yes.” Ava bit back. “It’s the best for everyone.”

Ava thought about how Rick looked the previous night. She couldn’t imagine putting him through any more stress just because they couldn’t deal with a bully like Negan. Behind her, Ava felt Eugene stand up from his chair, the man walking until he was standing side-by-side with Ava.

“Ava’s dealing with certainties, as am I.” Eugene defended. “I’m repairing this portable radio for them--.”

The unmistakable sound of trucks drowned out Eugene’s explanation. Ava turned towards the green mesh gate as Rosita and Spencer got out of their cars, both looking just as anxious as Ava. The two women shared a knowing look as a melodic whistle filled the air, and the shadow of a man became bigger as he moved closer to the gate.

Ava knew who it was even before he banged the bat against the barred fence.

“Little pig, little pig!” He called. “Let. Me. In!”

Negan’s voice was practically vibrating with excitement, which only filled Ava with fear. He promised to be back in a week, yet here he was two days later. There was a reason for this, and Ava wasn’t sure if she wanted to find out. Rosita took off towards Rick’s house, no doubt going to alert the leader of the unexpected arrival, while Ava strapped her gun to her back. It was Spencer who went up to the fence, sliding the mesh-covering of the gate to reveal the man himself.

Negan looked the same as he did two days earlier—a smug smirk on his face and a slight lean in his posture. It brought Ava back to that night, and she wondered how she would get through the day.

“Well?” Negan asked expectantly.

Spencer blinked. “Um, who are you?”

Ava closed her eyes as she shook her head in annoyance. Spencer knew exactly who he was, but his need to be the one in control had overtaken his common sense. Lucky for him, Negan seemed more amused than angry. 

“Oh, you better be jokin’!” Negan gestured to himself and the bat. “Negan, Lucille. I know I had to make a pretty strong first impression.”

Ava didn’t need to turn to know it was Rick’s footsteps that were coming up behind her. Negan’s smirk faded into a genuine smile, as if he was seeing an old friend and not someone he was torturing just a few days before.

“Well, hello there.”

“You said a week.” Rick growled as he wrapped his hands around the gate. “You’re early.”

Rick pulled the gate back, and Ava’s eyes widened at the sight of the crowd behind Negan. Numerous convoys were parked along the path, offering space that exceeded the ‘half’ limit. Ava swallowed. This wasn’t a routine pickup, this was Negan showing Alexandria just how much power he had.

Ava could hear Negan taunting Rick, but she wasn’t paying attention. Her focus shifted to the people behind him, and her breath caught in her throat when she saw him. Daryl stood among the crowd, dawning prison garb that was yellow with age and decay. Despite the distance between them, Ava could tell that his face was purple from bruising. They locked gazes for a moment before Daryl quickly looked way to his feet.  

“Let’s get started.” Negan announced. “Big day!”

And yet, all Ava wanted to do was cry.


	29. Take it All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Collection Day comes quicker than anyone anticipated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm alive! The end of the semester kicked my ass, but I made it and hope ya'll are surviving, too!
> 
> Lowkey, this chapter gave me a major block just because of Negan. I've never written for him before, and homeboy has a distinct voice. Hope I did him justice...
> 
> Enjoy!!

“Hot diggity dog! This place is magnificent!”

Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes as Negan took in the sight before him. He had only been in the community for a few minutes, and she was already growing weary of his theatrics. She glanced over at Rick, the leader holding onto ‘Lucille’ just a little too tightly. Half of Ava wished he would just swing, but that was a death wish. For all of them. To starve off the thoughts, she focused on Daryl, the man obviously avoiding her gaze.

He was shaking, a sign that his short time with the Saviors was already beginning to wear on him. Ava couldn’t imagine what he was going through. All she knew was that she needed to be near him. To offer some sort of comfort—if not in an embrace, then in words.

She was walking towards him before she could stop herself.

“Daryl--.”

“No!” Negan turned around, “Nope!”

Ava froze in her tracks as Negan took a few long strides until he was in front of her, blocking Ava’s view of Daryl.  His expression was hard as he studied Ava, however, she didn’t miss the glint of amusement in his eyes. Negan loved to play games, Ava figured as much since he relied on a nursery rhyme to decide the fate of Abe.

“He’s the help.” He chided. “You don’t talk to him, look at him, and I won’t make Ricky over there chop anything off him.” Negan then glanced towards the other Alexandrians. “Same goes for everyone, right?”

At the last question, his eyes fell back on Ava, the ever-present smile back on his face. It was unsettling. So unsettling that Ava backed down, her eyes downcast as she turned around and made her way further into the community. Rick offered a sad glance, as if thanking Ava for removing herself from the situation before it got too ugly.

The sound of Negan’s chuckle made Ava clench her fist, but she didn’t dare to turn around.

If she did, she would only regret it.

* * *

 

_“A lot of suspense there.” Negan whispered loudly to Rick as they watched Ava walk away. “I don’t think she knew how much.”_

_Daryl looked up from his broken shoes, catching a glimpse as Ava faded into the distance. He needed to remember what she looked like. He needed to remember why he was enduring this pain._

Enid knew something was wrong the moment Ava entered the Infirmary. She and Carl were reading a few textbooks when the older girl came bounding into the house, not even sparing the pair glance as she went towards the cabinets. It was when Ava grabbed an empty container and began filling it with pills when Enid finally addressed the elephant in the room.

 “Finally turning to self-medication, huh?”

Although Carl gave a small grin in response to Enid’s joke, Ava was clearly having none of it. And it wasn’t until she spoke when the teens realized why.

“The Saviors are here.” Ava’s voice was hollow. “They’re going to take half of everything, but I can guarantee we need this stuff more than they do.”

Ava could guess that the Saviors had a surplus of medical supplies from the other communities they had under their boot. Meanwhile, Alexandria was surviving on the absolute minimum. If Ava could hide at least a few pills and supplies from Negan, without it looking obvious, the community could survive until the next run. Enid understood Ava’s plan, and quickly went about hiding a few of the books; they needed all the help they could get without a real doctor in their midst. While the ladies worked, Carl simply glared.

“Is _he_ here?”

Carl spat the pronoun as if it was venom. Enid paused in her collecting to look at Ava as well, waiting for an answer. When the older girl simply nodded, Enid felt her blood run cold. She wanted to be strong, but the very idea of seeing Negan again made her want to curl up and cry, especially with the memory of that night still playing on repeat in her brain.

“I’ll keep watch.” Carl informed as he made his way towards the door. “I’ll let you know when they’re coming.”

Ava waited until Carl was out on the porch before turning to Enid. The younger girl went back to stacking books and putting them in their own boxes, but Ava could swear that she saw her shaking from her spot. Enid was never one to let her fear get the better of her, but they had never met someone like Negan. This was a whole new frontier for them, and if Ava could spare her a little pain, she would be willing to face the murderer alone.

“You can go back to the house, if you want.” Ava did her best to put on a comforting tone. “Carl and I can hold down the fort.”

Enid shook her head. “I’m not leaving you alone with him.”

“He may not even come.” Ava pointed out. “It’ll probably just be his lackeys.”

“Yeah, and I’m sure they’re all stand up guys.” Enid rolled her eyes. “I can handle it, Ava.”

Enid sent one last pointed glare before going back to work. Ava sighed, knowing that the conversation would not go any further. Enid made her choice, and it was clear nothing was going to change her mind. After Ava was sure that they collected a good amount of supplies, she went to the vent that was located on the floor and began dumping them into the cervices. The Saviors would no doubt peek in closets and cabinets, but they didn’t seem bright enough to check the floorboards.

“Are you sure this will work?” Enid’s worried tone reached Ava’s ears.

The older girl attached the vent back to the ground. “If it doesn’t, we better hope no one gets sick.”

Enid was about to respond when Carl walked into the infirmary, the boy quickly followed by a trio of Saviors. Two of them leered at the small group while the other went to work, ignoring their presence. It was unsettling, but Ava would rather feel unsettled by silence than due to one of the Saviors trying something. She moved out of the way, standing next to Enid with her arms crossed in front of her chest. Enid flinched as one of the men pulled a drawer out and dumped the contents on the counter before going through it. Ava bit her tongue. She knew they were doing this just to get under their skin, to make them act out, but she wouldn’t let them win. Luckily, Enid seemed to agree. They stood like statues, Ava hoping that their compliance would make the job go smoother.

However, Carl seemed to have other plans as he pulled a gun out from his pants and pointed it at one of the Saviors.

“That’s enough.”

Ava’s head snapped over to Carl, her eyes wide with fright. Enid glared at her friend, her blood running cold as she snapped at him.

“What the hell are you doing?”

One of the Saviors chuckled. “We’re taking it all, kid. How about you follow the women’s example and stay quiet?”

That was Ava’s breaking point. “You want to try that--.”

Her words were drowned out by the sound of gunfire, Carl firing a shot to the glass cabinet behind the Savior. The sound made Enid reach for her knife while Ava was too distracted by the ringing in her ear.

“Put some back.” Carl readied the hammer of the gun. “Or the next one goes in you.”

“What do you think happens now, kid?” The Savior asked, clearly amused.

“You die.”

Ava put a hand to her forehead, closing her eyes in exasperation. Maybe she should have had Carl go home. She opened her eyes when she heard Rick’s gentle tone, the father trying to get his son to put the gun down.

“He said only half!” Carl chided.

“Of course,” A familiar chuckle vibrated off the walls. “Really, kid?”

Enid involuntarily stepped backwards when Negan entered the house, the leader walking until he was in front of his Saviors. Ava stepped in front of Enid, ready to protect her from Negan. The man wouldn’t even be able to look at her if Ava could help it.

“Half is what I say it is.” Ava tuned back into the conversation just in time to hear Negan’s explanation. “Do you want me to prove how serious I am? Again?”

Ava held a breath, watching as Carl tightened his grip on the gun. He wasn’t going to hand it over, at least, not when Negan was the one asking. Swallowing her fear, Ava put a hand out.

“Carl.” She whispered, gesturing for the gun. “Come on.”

Carl turned to Ava, ready to deny the offer but paused when he noticed Enid. Enid, the girl he always saw as fearless, was staring at him with terrified eyes. She thought he was going to die. And maybe he would if he didn’t give up the gun. Letting out a defeated sigh, Carl handed the gun to Ava, who was about to hand it to Rick when Negan intercepted the weapon. The leader of the Saviors let out a low whistle.

“We got a serial killer whisperer over here.” Negan announced as he handed the weapon to one of his men.

Ava figured that would be the end of the interaction, but she was quickly proven wrong when Negan turned back to her with an expectant look. Ava didn’t know what he wanted, only that he expected to hear her speak.

“I’m…good with teenagers.” Ava answered before she could come up with anything else. “Had a lot of practice.”

Ava regretted her words the moment she saw Negan’s gaze go from her to Enid, the younger sister still cowering behind but now standing closer to Rick. The smile didn’t leave his face as he glanced between the two siblings, a knowing chuckle escaping his throat as he pointed to Rick.

 “Not gonna lie, I thought that little one belonged to you, but now I see the similarity.” He looked away from Rick in favor of settling his stare back on Ava. “It’s in the eyes.”

Under the weight of his gaze, Ava felt as if she was suffocating. She wondered if this was his version of flirting, a new way to mess with Daryl’s head later. The thought of her friend made Ava tense, and reminded her why she needed to be on her best behavior. Pursing her lips, Ava only nodded, and Negan seemed to accept it as he walked toward Rick.

“You know, this whole thing reminds me that you have a lot of guns.” Negan then put his arms out. “They’re all mine now.”

And suddenly, losing medicine didn’t seem so bad.

* * *

 

_“Let me put this to all of you as clearly as I can.”  Rick addressed the Church. “I’m not in charge anymore. Negan is.”_

Spencer was going to be pissed.

That’s all Ava could think as she ransacked Deanna’s office. Two guns were missing, and Olivia’s life was on the line if they couldn’t bring them to Negan by the end of the day. After no one came clean during the meeting, Ava made a beeline for Spencer’s house with Rick and Gabriel on her heels. He never trusted Rick, and Ava could see him hoarding a few weapons “just in case” the leader went off the rails. That was the kind of self-righteous man Spencer claimed to be.   

While Carl went off to mope about the guns getting taken, Enid decided to look in Rosita’s house. It was no secret that the pair had been getting closer, and Ava could see them banding together hide weapons for their own personal gains. Granted, Rosita didn’t have any ill-will about Rick, but after seeing how annoyed she was after Ava rejected her idea for a plan against Negan, Ava wouldn’t be surprised if she stashed a gun to carry out an assassination ploy. 

“Ava.”

Ava turned away from the bookshelf to see Rick standing in the doorway, the man holding a pistol in one hand and a can of beans in the other. All the air left her body at the sight.

“Unbelievable.”

“I wish it was.” Rick looked down at the objects in his hands. “It’s one thing to stow away a gun, but food? We’ve been running low on rations for weeks.”

 A humorless laugh left Ava’s throat. Spencer was one of the first people to start complaining when food began to run low, and here he was stocking up. When Ava first met him, she considered him to be better than Aiden, but here he was turning into him. Keeping secrets was a dangerous game around Rick Grimes, and Ava swallowed when she through about her own.

“Enid and I hid some meds and textbooks from Negan before you guys came.” Ava blurted out. “Enough to get us through, but not enough for the Saviors to notice.”

Silence passed, and Ava couldn’t gauge Rick’s reaction. She wondered if he was waiting for more.

“But, in case they do, I don’t want anyone else’s lives on the line.” She breathed. “Just mine.”

If the Saviors did find out that Alexandria kept supplies from them, Ava didn’t want a random volunteer at the Infirmary to be blamed. It was her idea, and thus she should be the one at risk. Rick took a step forward, and Ava braced herself for a lecture.

“Where did you hide them?”

Ava blinked. “Under the floor of the infirmary.”

Rick nodded, and Ava waited for him to tell her to go retrieve the supplies. To bring them to Negan before he demanded them. However, none of that came.

“Smart thinking.” He ran his hand through his ever-growing curls. “But let’s move it somewhere after they leave.”

With that, Rick left the room, and Ava found herself smiling for the first time since Negan entered their lives.

* * *

 

After making sure that she left the house just like she arrived, Enid walked down the stairs of Rosita’s porch. Although she was relieved that Rosita wasn’t hiding any weapons, she was more than a little discouraged over the search. All Enid could do was hope that Ava and Rick were luckier than she was—for Olivia’s sake.

The whole situation made Enid feel anxious, and she found herself digging through her back pocket to pull out a familiar object. She clutched the deflated green balloons in her hand, closing her eyes as she thought of Glenn’s words to her: _“…you honor the dead by going on.”_

Enid scoffed. Being under the boot of the man who murdered Glenn wasn’t her idea of honoring his memory. 

“Balloons?”

Enid snapped out of her memories to see one of Negan’s men in front of her. It was the same one from the infirmary—the one who Carl threatened. Enid opened her mouth, ready to defend herself when the man snatched the balloons out of her hand.

“Hey!”

“You going to a party little girl?”

Enid wanted to throw up. No, she wanted to punch this guy’s lights out, but she couldn’t. Not with Negan so close, and especially with Olivia’s life still in the balance. So, she bit her tongue and swallowed her pride.

“Can I keep them?” Her words were filtered through clenched teeth. “It’s just…let me keep them. Please.”

They were all she had to remember Glenn. It was their thing before he was taken from this world too soon. The Savior didn’t seem moved by her plea as a smirk overtook his lips. He stepped forward making Enid involuntarily take a step backwards.

“Say please again, little girl.”

Now Enid wanted to vomit.  She should’ve figured this man would be a creep—she saw the way he stared at Ava back in the infirmary. Enid was not about to give him what he wanted. She stood her ground, her eyes boring into his. She braced herself for another comment when a familiar voice boomed through the air.

“David!” Negan called as he walked towards the pair. “What’chu up to?”

Enid watched as ‘David’ stood up straight, no longer hunched over her like a dying tree as he greeted his boss. Olivia trailed behind Negan, the woman no doubt following an order from him. Enid didn’t care. Seeing Olivia alive and well already made her feel better.

“Sir, I was just--.”

“Being a dick?” Negan interrupted, his tone playful but eyes hard with authority. “We don’t need that crap back at the Sanctuary. Give the girl back her balloons.”   

Without a moment to waste, David practically threw the balloons back at Enid. She clenched onto them tightly, as if worried that Negan would change his mind.

“Apologize to the lady.”

Enid couldn’t help but mirror David’s confused look. She didn’t want an apology, she just wanted them to go away. David swallowed nervously.

“S—Sorry.”

“’Attaboy!” Negan lit up before getting serious. “Now get the hell outta my sight.”

David was quick to comply, leaving the scene in a flash. Enid wanted nothing more than to follow the creep’s lead and vanish as well, but Negan wasn’t done soaking up the spotlight.

“Davey gets a little overexcited on collection days.” He explained. “It’s annoying as hell.”

Enid merely nodded. Maybe if she didn’t talk back, he would let her go.

“I’m waiting.”

She blinked. “For what?”

 “Did that sister of yours teach you any manners?” Negan chuckled. “A thank you would be nice.”

Enid resisted the urge to roll her eyes. David may have been a creep, but Negan was exhausting. However, the quicker she did this, the quicker she could crawl in bed.

“Thank you.” The phrase stung as it left her lips.

“You are welcome!” Negan smiled, his white teeth almost blinding. He stared at her a moment longer before finally saying the words Enid wanted to hear. “I’ll see you later.”

As Negan turned away, Enid let out a breath she had no idea that she was holding. Yes, Negan was exhausting, but he was still intimidating. Enid felt as if she was walking on eggshells in her own community. She shouldn’t feel such a way in her own home. As she walked towards her house, Enid was beginning to realize that Alexandria was starting to feel less like a home to her, and that interaction didn’t help its’ case.

Maybe she needed a change. Maybe she could honor Glenn's memory with the change as well.

* * *

 

_“Please.” Ava cringed as Rick pleaded with Negan at the front gates. “Just…give me a second.”_

Ava kept her distance as they waited for Rick to return. The Saviors were finally leaving. Ava guessed that Negan decided that they caused enough trouble for one day. The relief was short-lived when her gaze landed on Daryl. For both their sake, Ava had done her best to avoid being in the same area as Daryl, hoping that would make his departure easier. Ava wanted to punch herself for thinking such a farewell could be made ‘easier’.

“I didn’t catch your name.”

Negan’s voice made Ava look away from Daryl, the leader’s eyes going between the pair. He obviously was watching her as she watched Daryl, but it looked like he was going to let it slide. Luckily. She stole one last look to Daryl, noticing how he slightly tensed when he watched Negan address her. Ava sent him a look of warning; control yourself.

“Sweetheart.” Negan called for attention. “Now.”

“Ava.” She quickly answered, hoping it would make him stop referring her through a pet name. “It’s Ava.”

“Ava.” He tested the name on his tongue, smiling when he decided that he liked it.

Daryl huffed air through his nose, and Ava wanted nothing more than to remind him that she could handle herself. That she wasn’t worth getting punished over. Luckily, the return of Rick and Michonne prompted enough of a distraction for Negan. A new pair to entertain him, and a chance for Ava to collect herself.

“Now that you know we can follow your rules,” Rick hesitated for a moment before continuing. “I would like to ask you if Daryl could stay.”

The request made Ava tune back in, her heart racing with anticipation. It was a long-shot, but maybe Negan could be moved by their obedience. It was clear he considered Daryl an object, hopefully so much so that he could be given back as a trophy. An award. It was a sick thought, but Ava saw Negan as a sick man.

“Not happening.”

Disappointment came over Ava like a cloud. She was sure her expression communicated the emotion clearly when she saw the way Negan turned to her, a sick smirk growing on his face. Dread instantly replaced her despair.

“Maybe Daryl can plead his case, maybe he can sway me.” Negan grinned, turning to Daryl. “Daryl?’

Ava turned towards Daryl, curious as to what his move would be. For the first time, Daryl met her gaze, his eyes glassy with exhaustion and tears. When he parted his lips, Ava waited with baited breath to see what he would say. However, no words came. Instead, the man simply shook his head before avoiding her gaze once more. It hurt but Ava understood. They all knew that there were no words that could sway a man like Negan.

“Well, you tried!” Negan’s squeaky chuckle rumbled through the air.

Negan went back to terrorizing Rick and Ava took that as her chance to get away. She needed to put as much distance between her and Daryl as possible. She couldn’t watch him get taken away. Not again.

* * *

 

“They took our mattresses.”

Enid was sitting on the porch steps when Ava made it back to the house. The younger girl looked just as defeated as Ava felt. With a sigh, Ava planted herself next to her.

“Of course, they did.”

“We can’t live like this.”

Ava closed her eyes. “I can’t do this. Not now, okay?”

She couldn’t hear about any plans for rebelling or going behind Rick’s back. Not after seeing the condition Daryl was in. If Alexandria tried something, it would be him that got punished for it. Enid pursed her lips.

“What if we went to Hilltop?”

The request came out of nowhere. Ava knew Enid was curious about the settlement since she couldn’t see it, but to want to pick up everything and go there? Ava couldn’t imagine leaving Alexandria. This was her home, even if it didn’t feel the same. It was still theirs.

“Negan owns them.” Ava shook her head. “It wouldn’t be a change.”

“Yeah, but at least we’ll be closer to Maggie.”

Now it all made sense to Ava. After the lineup, Enid wanted to go with Maggie, and that instinct hasn’t faded away. Ava wanted to see Maggie too, to make sure that she, and the baby, were healthy. But she couldn’t leave Alexandria when they needed her the most. When Rick needed her. Without Ava, he would definitely be outnumbered when it came to dealing with Negan.

“I miss Maggie, you know that.” Ava ran a hand through her hair. “But we can’t leave Alexandria with everything going wrong.”

Silence passed between the pair, and Ava thought the discussion was over until Enid spoke up.

“Maybe you can’t,” Enid took a breath. “But I can.”

That wasn’t an option in Ava’s mind. For the longest time, the sisters have always been together. She should’ve known that Enid would want to separate eventually—but Ava didn’t know if that could happen with their current threat.

“It won’t be forever.” Enid promised, as if sensing the hesitation. “I just…I need to see her.”

Enid couldn’t stop thinking about Glenn. He would want Maggie to be surrounded by loved ones. Ava pursed her lips in thought, and Enid waited for an answer.

“Tomorrow.” Ava sighed. “We’ll discuss it tomorrow.”

It was clear Ava couldn’t make any big decisions today as she leaned backwards and closed her eyes. However, Enid smiled. She smiled because Ava hadn’t said no.

 


	30. The Nest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava makes a decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much like the walking dead, this story needs its' "filler" chapters. However, important stuff does happen! 
> 
> As always, thanks for putting up with me.

_“I didn’t know you had a little girlfriend, Daryl!”_

_Negan chuckled as Dwight pulled Daryl along the maze of hallways to get back to his cell. He tensed at the mention of Ava but kept his composure. He hated himself for making it obvious that he had a soft spot for her. Daryl didn’t care that Negan was using her to get in his head, all he worried about was what Negan would do if he got in a room alone with Ava. Dwight opened the door of his cell and pushed him into the darkness. However, the door didn’t close, and Negan leaned against the doorway._

_“If you’re a good boy, maybe I’ll bring her back with me.”_

_That was it. Daryl huffed and made a run for the man only to collide with the cell door._

Sleep evaded Ava that night.

She tried to pin it on the fact that the musty sleeping bag she occupied was uncomfortable, but it was really the snoring girl on the couch that was driving Ava’s anxiety wild. When it came to Enid wanting to leave Alexandria, Ava has always been ready to defuse the situation. However, she never would have expected that Enid would want to leave for another community.

Granted, it warmed Ava’s heart that Enid wanted to be close to Maggie. As an older sister, she was worried that Enid was closing herself off to the Alexandrians, yet here she was, ready to take a day’s trip just to see if one was okay. Hell, she had been ready to leave since the lineup. To be independent and make a choice of her own. To leave the ‘nest.’

Who was Ava to deny her that opportunity?

Running her hands down her face, Ava got out of her sleeping bag and went towards the door. She needed to take a walk. More accurately, she needed a drink and they were all out of booze. After pulling her boots on, Ava quietly left the house and made her way towards the only other house that had its’ lights still on. Swallowing her pride, she knocked on the door.

Spencer opened the door with a smile that quickly disappeared when he saw who it was.

“No.”

When he went to close the door, Ava put her foot out. “This isn’t a treat for me either.”

“Then why are you here?”

Ava took a deep breath. “I need a drink.”

Spencer narrowed his eyes, and Ava prepared herself for rejection. He clearly thought too much of himself if he thought she was here for a night in the sack. Ava outgrew him. Spencer leaned on the doorway.

“You could’ve stolen some when you and Rick went through my stuff.” His tone was condescending. “Not like I would’ve noticed between you and the Saviors.”

“That’s why you’re mad?” Ava scoffed. “Olivia almost died because of your cowardly bullshit, but I’m sorry if your pride was hurt. I’m sure Rosita will comfort you.”

The apology dripped with sarcasm, and Ava made sure it stung before turning around and descending the porch steps. She didn’t know what she was thinking coming to him, but desperation had always made her do crazy things.

“Rosita was mad at me about the guns.”

Ava didn’t know why Spencer would share that information. For sympathy? No. Maybe he was beginning to realize he was running out of friendly faces in the community his mom built. Either way, she didn’t spare the man a glance as she spoke.

“Glad to hear that she still has some sense left.”

“It’s all Rick’s fault.” He grumbled. “He’s the reason I hid the gun in the first place.”

The accusation made Ava turn around. Through all the madness, Ava never blamed Rick. They all killed Saviors that night, and the people who didn't come accepted that they would do just that. Spencer wasn’t the only one in Alexandria that blamed Rick for the Savior’s presence, but Ava knew he was the only one who was dangerous with that anger. She stayed on the middle porch step as she glared.

“Don’t put all this on him.”

“You’re defending him?” Spencer scoffed. “Daryl’s gone because of him. Glenn, Abe--.”

“You weren’t there!”

Ava’s loud interruption effectively silenced Spencer, but the man didn’t look any less angry as he crossed his arms over his chest. Ava ran a hand through her hair, calming herself down as she took a breath.

“I hope you never have to see what Enid and I saw that night.”

With that, Ava descended the porch steps as Spencer solemnly watched.

Maybe Carol left some alcohol behind. 

* * *

 

_When Enid woke up, Ava was already gone. She heard her leave during the night, and Enid didn’t fall back asleep until Ava settled back in her sleeping bag. From her slight stumbling, Enid figured she went out for a drink. She couldn’t blame her older sister. If it hurt Enid to see Daryl in such bad condition, she couldn’t even imagine the pain Ava was going through._

_Not being able to fathom her pain made Enid worry about leaving Ava alone. Granted, with the group they assembled, she wouldn’t be alone per say, but the nights were always the hardest for her. Enid fell back asleep with second thoughts swirling in her head._

“You sure you don’t want to come?” Rick leaned on the open car door as Aaron helped Eugene open the gate. “Could always use another pair of eyes.”

From her perch on top of the gate, Ava offered Rick a soft smile. With Negan hinting to Rick that he wanted ‘something interesting’ for their next collection day, the leader wasn’t wasting any time. Dawn was barely breaking and he was already hitting the road. Although Negan said he would be back in two weeks they now knew how he liked to drop in a little too early. Alexandria needed to keep the Saviors happy. It didn’t matter if the community disagreed when their lives depended on it.

Although Ava was tempted to go with Rick and Aaron, she was needed here. Not only did she promise Enid an answer, but after her talk with Spencer last night, Ava wanted to keep an eye on him. His words were more than just venting. He truly believed he could be a better leader than Rick and with the Sheriff gone, Ava wanted to make sure he didn’t try anything.

However, telling Rick all these things would only stress him out more.

“With Sasha gone, I’m pulling double guard duty.” Ava half-lied.

From below, Eugene raised a hand. “I’m here for additional shifts as well.”

“Make it triple.”

Aaron let out a knowing laugh as Eugene frowned. Ava appreciated that he wanted to show his worth, but having someone to constantly train was a bit exhausting. Aaron made his way back to the car.

“We’ll be back in a few days.” Rick informed. “Michonne is going to go hunting and Olivia’s watching Carl and Judith but if you’re not busy--.”

“I’ll check on Carl.” Ava interrupted. “He’ll come around.”

Out of the entire community, Carl was the one giving his father the most lip about serving Negan. Ava understood his hatred, but she also understood that this was the way things had to be. At least for now. Rick nodded, a sign of appreciation, before going back to the driver’s seat. Aaron lingered.

“We’re going North.”

Ava grinned. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

With that, the pair drove through the gate and out of Alexandria. Ava took a breath, hoping that they could keep the peace for at least three days.

* * *

 

_At first, Ava thought her eyes were playing tricks on her. However, after using the binoculars, she hurriedly called down to Eugene to open the gate. Tara soon strolled through, all smiles as she dawned a pair of pink sunglasses. Her carefree attitude faded the moment Eugene broke into tears, the woman looking up as Ava climbed down the ladder._

_“Did I miss something?” She asked, her voice shaking with worry._

_Ava swallowed the growing lump in her throat._

After her shift ended, Ava considered following Tara to the infirmary. The only thing that stopped her was the memory of her friend’s destroyed expression. Tara needed time to grieve, to be alone in the space she and Denise once called ‘home.’ As she walked back to her house, Ava noticed Rosita heading towards the infirmary, hoping her intentions were leaning towards comfort.

Enid was in the living room when Ava walked in, a comic book spread out in her lap as she stretched herself over the armchair. The young girl offered a smile.

“How was the shift?”

Ava plopped down on the couch. She didn’t remember much about her guard duty, the only memory in her mind being the one of her friend crumbling before her.

 “Tara's back.”

That caught Enid’s attention. Tara had been gone for weeks, and Enid almost forgot that she didn’t know about Denise. Almost. Enid sat upright, ready to ask the painfully obvious question.

“How’d she take it?”  

“She’s devastated.” Ava confirmed with a frown. “But, telling her made me realize something.”

Ava replayed Tara’s face in her mind; the heartbreak, the guilt. Although she cared about her feelings, all Ava could think about was Enid and Maggie. Glenn and Maggie were the first people Enid made herself open up to in Alexandria. She trusted Glenn enough to bring her back to Alexandria. She cared deeply about Maggie, loved her like another older sister. If something were to happen to Maggie, or the baby, at Hilltop and Enid wasn’t there for it, she would never forgive herself for being absent.

“You don’t want to go to Hilltop to get away from the Saviors, you want to be with Maggie through every little thing.”

Enid nodded. It was why she wanted to go with Maggie and Sasha the morning the lineup ended. She had lost her husband, her support. She owed it to Maggie and Glenn to be there for her. Ava rubbed the back of her neck.

 “I don’t want you to find out any news about Maggie from a messenger.” Ava thought about telling Tara the news, how her words of support could never truly help Tara heal. “You should go to Hilltop.”

Enid brightened up. “Really?”

“Have to leave the nest sometime, right?” Ava tried to joke.

If something were to happen to Maggie, Ava knew Enid would never forgive herself for not being there. Her little sister couldn’t be weighed down by anymore guilt. Without a moment to waste, Enid got up from the chair and hugged Ava. The older girl closed her eyes, holding her tighter. However, the moment cut off when Enid pulled away.

“What about you?” She asked, her worries from the night before creeping up. “Will you be okay…alone?” 

Ava couldn’t help but smile at the question. There was a time in their lives when Enid would’ve loved to be away from her, but that was out of selfishness. Now she cared enough to ask about Ava’s well-being, and it was that shift that told Ava that this could work.

“I mean, we haven’t been apart since the world ended, so it’ll take some getting used to.” Ava sheepishly admitted, “But, that feeling you get about Maggie and Hilltop? I feel that here.”

Enid grinned. Alexandria was always more of Ava’s home than her own. Even with Daryl gone and the Saviors stripping away their freedoms, Ava could never abandon the place that saved their lives. Ava then shrugged.

“Plus, you’re just a drive away.”

Enid couldn’t help it as she embraced Ava once more. Ava had given her everything since she was born, and here she was offering the gift of independence and trust. Enid didn’t know if she could ever repay her, but she would spend every day trying.

* * *

 

_“Wait, you’re leaving?” Carl asked as he watched Enid pack her bag. “Like…really leaving?”_

_After expressing her desire to leave today, Ava was doing her best to find a usable car while Enid focused on packing. It wasn't even noon yet, so they figured it was still early enough to make a trip to Hilltop. Enid already missed so much with Maggie, and she didn’t want to lose another day. Glenn wouldn’t wait, and neither would she._

_“I need to see Maggie.” Enid explained without looking up. “And it’s not forever.”_

_“I want to see her, too.” Carl crossed his arms. “And…maybe I’m not ready to say goodbye just yet.”_

_Enid looked up from her pack, instantly taking in Carl’s somber expression. Of course he wanted to be with Maggie, he had known the woman way longer than herself, but he also wanted to be with Enid. For just a moment more._

_And maybe Enid wanted that, too._

“I swear to god, if you tell your dad about this…”

Ava didn’t know how Carl and Enid convinced her to let them go to Hilltop on their own. Maybe she didn’t need convincing at all; she knew how capable the pair were when it came to dealing with the horrors of the outside world. Maybe Ava wanted to give them the alone time they never seemed to have enough of with Rick, Michonne, and herself always lurking around. 

Maybe Ava knew that saying goodbye to Enid now would be a easier than doing so at Hilltop.

“Just tell him you drove us.”

Carl shrugged along with his statement, as if lying to his dad wouldn’t still cause the leader massive anxiety. Ava let out a small laugh as she pushed the gate open, her smile fading as she gazed at the outside world. The world she was letting Enid embark without her for the first time.

She turned back around to face the teens, noticing that Enid had the same whimsical look. As if sensing the emotion, Carl walked away as he fiddled with the knife in his hands, as if it was the most interesting object in existence. Ava took a deep breath as she stood in front of Enid.

“Don’t fire your gun unless you have to.” Ava began, wanting to list off as many tips as she could remember. “And if a walker doesn’t notice you, don’t bother with it. It’s never worth it. Uh--.”

“Ava.” Enid softly interrupted. “You taught me everything I need to know.”

The older girl let out a shaking sigh before pulling Enid into a hug. Both Ava and Enid had to keep reminding themselves that this wasn’t going to be the last time they ever saw each other, but that didn’t change the fact that it would be the longest they have ever been apart since the dead rose.

It would be a shift, but Enid was grateful that Ava was allowing her such a change.

“I’ll see you soon.” Ava spoke in a promising tone as they pulled apart. “Send Maggie and Sasha my love.”

“I will.” Enid went in for another hug. “I love you.”

Ava held her tighter. “I love you, too.”

With one last squeeze, Ava let Enid go. It was then Carl sauntered up, offering Ava a warm smile as he touched her arm.

“Thanks for everything, Ava.”

Ava narrowed her eyes in confusion. She noticed how Carl’s words felt heavier than a casual goodbye.  

“You’re coming back, right?” She raised her brows. “Your dad will _actually_ kill me if you don’t.”

Carl’s own eyes slightly widened, and Ava’s confusion only escalated.

“Yeah, I will.” He quickly corrected himself. “It’ll just…be a few days.”

Ava tried not to read too much into the gesture. If she was letting Enid go out on her own, she could do the same for a kid that wasn’t part of her family by blood. Instead, she focused on saying one last goodbye to her sister before watching the teens embark on the empty road ahead. 

She waited until they were no longer visible before closing the gate. 

* * *

 

Enid was grateful for Carl’s company. If Ava had been the one to take her to Hilltop, she had a feeling that she would never leave.

Hell, Enid would want her to stay, but this was her chance for independence. More importantly, it was a chance for her to be with Maggie during these rough days. Ever since that night, Enid couldn’t stop thinking about Glenn. He saved her, and she couldn’t save him. The least she could do was be with his wife and child.

“I watched it happen.” Carl’s voice cut through the air like a knife. “Both times.”

She didn’t need to ask what he was referring to. Enid was next to him in the lineup, and although she had covered her face for Glenn’s demise, she remembered watching Carl’s unflinching stare. Although his body was shaking, his eye never looked away. Enid didn’t blame him. When the first hit came down on Abe, she was practically hypnotized by the gore, unable to look away from the horror. However, Glenn’s end came so suddenly, she wasn’t prepared to watch the man she came to favor end in such a violent way.

Enid could still hear Maggie’s cries echoing through her head.

“I couldn’t.” She admitted. “I watched…the first, but the second…”

She shook her head, unable to even say their names aloud.Carl wished that Enid wouldn’t have been there. If he could go back in time, he would’ve locked her away to stop her from joining them. Yet, he knew the violence was necessary. For both to do what needed to be done.

“We need to remember it.” He tried to reassure her. “When it comes time to bring him down, we need that in our minds.”

Enid nodded. She wanted to bring Negan down, but that would take years, especially after seeing the way Rick fell in line. Right now, her focus was on Maggie.

“It’ll be hard not to think about it when we see Maggie.” Enid continued. “She lost everything.”

“Not everything.” Carl gave a small grin. “She has you.”

Enid rolled her eyes at the sappy comment. She appreciated Carl trying to make her feel better, but that didn’t change the fact that Maggie no longer has Glenn in her life. Hell, Enid didn’t know if Maggie still had the baby. After seeing the way she fared that night, Enid realized she had to prepare herself for that possibility.

“We don’t even know if she’s okay.” Enid whispered to herself.

Carl offered a sympathetic look before focusing on the road ahead. “We’ll get there.”

Enid didn’t respond as she kicked a fallen leaf, watching it jump ahead down the road before kicking it once more. Ignorance may be bliss to some people, but Enid needed to know. Even if she hated the answer, at least she’ll no longer be living in uncertainty.

* * *

 

Not long after Enid left, Spencer, Gabriel, Rosita, and Eugene all went out scavenging. Although they left at the same time, Ava noticed that they were going in different directions. She didn’t care enough to ask, not in the mood to deal with the attitudes of Rosita and Spencer. Ava had enough going on in her life, she didn’t need to add their troubles to her own.

Ava had to keep herself busy. If she didn’t, she knew she would fall apart. She wanted Enid to be with Maggie, but that didn’t change the fact that she was now without her little sister for the first time in years. It was a drastic shift that only distracting herself could solve.

She thought about taking another guard shift, but the Alexandrians needed to practice on keeping a watchful eye on the perimeter. Ava wouldn’t let her own needs get in the way of the community’s so instead she decided it was time to check on Tara. Her friend was blunt enough that if she didn’t want Ava around, she would make it known.

Tara answered on the first knock. Her eyes a bit puffy, but cheeks now dry of tears.  

“Hey.”

Ava held up what was left of Carol’s stash of whiskey. “Want some company?”

“God, yes.”

That made two of them, Ava more than relieved when Tara stepped aside and let her into the familiar infirmary.


	31. Guest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enid and Carl journey to Hilltop. At least, that's what was supposed to happen.

_Enid didn’t know how long they had been walking, but the pair had descended into silence a few moments ago. She ended up taking up the front, her eyes focused on the road ahead as she struggled to not think about Ava. She hoped her sister wasn’t feeling lonely, but more than anything, Enid hoped she made the right choice. She didn’t want to miss anything with Maggie, but what if something happened to Ava? Would she be able to get to her in time?_

_“Enid, stop.”_

_The command made her snap out of her thoughts, and Enid turned around to see Carl holding up a pair of roller-skates. She couldn’t resist the small smile that took over her features._

_“I never took you as a skater, Grimes.”_

_“I’m not.” Carl grinned as he pulled on one of the skates. “But it beats walking.”_

_Enid couldn’t agree more as she walked over and tugged on her own pair of skates. As the pair started skating down the road, it was as if all of Enid’s worries faded away. For once, she felt like a normal kid again. A girl who was laughing with a boy and struggled to hide her blush as they interlocked their fingers._

_She smiled. This could work._

“It came out of nowhere.” Ava kept her gaze on the wood floor. “One minute she was giving us a lecture, the next she was on the ground.”

Tara took a swig of whiskey before passing the bottle to Ava. Although Rosita gave Tara the cliff notes of Denise's death, she wanted to hear the whole story from a true witness. It wouldn’t give her peace, but Ava hoped she got a bit of comfort in knowing that even her presence couldn’t have stopped the arrow.

“Did Dwight come here with Negan?”

For the first time since knowing her, Ava was reluctant to tell Tara the truth. She wanted to know if Dwight was a regular for pickups so that she could strike. It would be satisfying, but the community would pay the price. 

“Yeah, but he was always with people.” Ava sighed. “It looked like he was in charge of…the prisoners.”

Tara frowned as she watched Ava gulp down the liquid, trying to get the image of Daryl getting manhandled by Dwight out of her mind. Luckily, Rosita told Tara about the lineup and the morning after, so Ava didn’t have to relive that pain. But Tara wondered what Negan wanted with Daryl. Whatever his role was it couldn’t be pretty.

“Maybe Rick can work out a deal to get him back.” Tara tried to be optimistic.

She let out a huff, “I think we lost that privilege the moment we went into the Outpost.”

 They lost everything when they went into that Outpost, and it all started with Denise. Tara ran a hand down her face before gesturing for the bottle.

“Okay, I think I’m done talking about this for now.” She groaned as Ava passed over the liquid. “Tell me something else.”

Ava leaned back on her hands. It was odd to be asked to talk about something other than the Savior situation, but she was glad to veer Tara off the topic for a bit. Even if it meant bringing up her own life.

“Enid’s going to be staying in Hilltop.” Ava spoke casually, as if this wasn’t a huge change.

Tara cut her drink short. “Since when?”

“A few hours ago, maybe?” Ava shrugged. “She left with Carl.”

“For how long?” Her questions were quick, Tara saying them aloud the moment they entered her mind.

“At least until Maggie has her baby.” She answered. “But I have a feeling she’s going to want to stay.”

They told themselves that it wasn’t going to be forever, and although Ava would see Enid again, that didn’t mean she would be returning to Alexandria permanently. Tara studied Ava for a moment before a small smile came over her features.

“You’re taking this better than I thought you would.”

“Oh, don’t be too proud of me. I’m burying the ‘Mama Bear Feels’ way down.” Ava lightly joked, although she knew she wasn’t lying. “She deserves a chance to have her own life away from me, you know?”

It was what their parents did for Ava before the world ended. Granted, going away to college couldn’t compare to navigating the world of the dead, but it was how the world was now. And Enid couldn’t stay glued to Ava’s side forever—no matter how much the older sister wished she could. Tara smiled as she lifted the bottle in the air, as if giving a toast.

“Here’s to letting kids grow up.”

Ava let out a small laugh as Tara took a drink. She then passed it to her, and Ava took a long sip, letting the alcohol warm her throat. 

* * *

 

Enid adjusted the skates on her shoulder as she followed Carl up the grassy hill. They skated hand-in-hand until they reached the grass valley, and although the skates came off, Carl still reached for her hand. He didn’t want the connection to end, and Enid realized she didn’t either as she interlocked their fingers once more.

She could hear the familiar hum of engines trucks. Her heart dropped when she realized the sound was reminiscent of the Savior collection day. Her suspicions of the Saviors’ presence were confirmed as she surveyed the scene below. The grey trucks sat stationary as men and women filled them up with supplies meant for Hilltop. Enid sighed, hoping that they were almost done.

“We can stay up here, wait them out.”

“I don’t think Negan’s here.” Carl ignored her. “I don’t see that black truck.”

It was then Enid looked at Carl. Taking in his unflinching stare as he surveyed the convoys, Enid wondered why it took her this long to see the obvious. Carl wasn’t going to Hilltop.

“You’re not here for Maggie.” She quietly spoke before pulling her hand from his grip. “Or me.”

“I can’t let him get away with this.” Carl explained himself before looking over at Enid. “I was telling the truth when I told you I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to you.”

Like the rest of Alexandria, Carl couldn’t wait. However, instead of whining about it, he was acting. It would’ve been honorable to Enid if she wasn’t so worried that she was about to lose him forever. It all made sense now; how Carl told her he didn’t want to say goodbye to her while she was packing. He wanted one last good day with her. Carl wanted to give Enid a good memory before his possible death, and that broke her heart.

“Come with me.” He went on. “You want to kill him too. We can do it.”

Enid bit her lip. She didn’t want Negan to live a long life after all the lives he cut short, and she’d be lying to herself If she said that watching Negan die by her hand wouldn’t bring her satisfaction. However, if Enid were to go with Carl, she wouldn’t be killing Negan for Maggie or the victims, she would only be doing it for herself. That wasn’t right.

“It wouldn’t be for them.” Enid voiced her opinion. “You’re only doing it for you.”

Enid realized just how close she was standing to Carl. His breath tickled her cheeks as he hummed his agreement. He wasn’t ashamed of his selfishness for he knew that it would bring them peace in the end. Enid gazed up at him, his eye already on her. Enid wondered If he ever looked away from her.

“If it all goes right, I will never see you again.”

Carl whispered. “It doesn’t matter.”

“It does to me.”

He sighed before gently resting his forehead against hers. The gesture was innocent enough, but Enid couldn’t ignore how her heart instantly raced at the touch. Was this how Ava felt in those small moments with Daryl? Enid hated that this could be the last time she experienced this, her eyes closing as she fought back tears. As if sensing her frustration, Carl planted a soft kiss on her forehead.

Before Enid could stop herself, she opened her eyes and raised her head to meet Carl’s lips in a kiss. She had never met anyone who she would want to give her first kiss to until she got to know Carl. He was sweet, gentle, someone she could trust. And as they parted, Enid knew she couldn’t lose him. She didn’t want this to be their first and last kiss.

“Please don’t go.” She quietly begged, pulling at his hands. “Just come with me.”

It could be so easy. They could stay with Maggie, explore the Hilltop. They could be together and live for themselves. Even before Carl started shaking his head, Enid could tell there was no convincing him. He was ready to die for the sake of the future. She let out a humorless laugh.

“You shouldn’t go.” A ghost of a smile took over her features. “But I can’t stop you.”

Carl didn’t say anything as Enid gave him one last peck on the cheek before descending the hill. She wasn’t even halfway when Carl called to her in a low voice. She froze, worried that she was about to hear a final farewell.

“They’ll see you.”

She smiled, relieved that he wasn’t trying to say something sappy. “No, they won’t.”

 _"Don't look back."_ She recalled Ava telling her as they walked away from feasting Walkers. _"Never look back."_

As promised, Enid followed her sister's words. 

* * *

 

_Ava held her breath as she splashed water to her face. Drinking in the early afternoon was never a good idea, but it especially wasn’t ideal when the drinker didn’t have a restful night before. Or when the alcohol escalates the drinker’s already brimming anxiety over if her sister got to her home in one piece._

_She took a deep breath. Enid was fine. Carl was fine. Everyone is where they needed to be. Ava repeated those words as she walked back into the main room of the infirmary. She paused in her steps when she noticed Tara fast asleep on the floor, clutching the bottle in her hands as if it was a stuffed animal.  Ava sadly smiled. She was glad Tara was getting some rest, but she knew all too well the pain that awaited her upon waking up._

_Ava sighed as she grabbed a blanket and pillow from one of the cupboards before doing her best to make Tara comfortable. After placing the pillow beneath her friend’s head, and draping the scratchy blanket over her, Ava laid down on the exam table. She closed her eyes, relishing in the warmth radiating from the windows._

_Everyone is where they need to be._

It only took Enid a few seconds to be enchanted by Hilltop.

Despite the stench of the Saviors still lingering in the air, the residents were quick to extend a hospitable hand to Enid. A woman named Terry gave her a tour, showing off the multiple crops and cattle they had throughout their community; Enid noticed a few missing crops, knowing that they were now on their way to Negan. Thinking of the man with the bat soured Enid’s mood but it did remind her that she needed to find Maggie.

Although Terry wasn’t much help in locating the woman, she did tell Enid about how Maggie, Sasha, and a man named Jesus saved the community from a walker intrusion last night. Enid listened as Terry spoke of Maggie, watching as her eyes sparkled with admiration for the pregnant woman. She grinned. Maggie had only been here for a few days, and she was already winning over the population.

The day took a solemn turn as Terry left Enid at the only two graves within Hilltop. She didn’t need markings to tell her who they were for, and Enid was grateful when Terry left her alone to pay her respects. Taking a breath, Enid walked over to the one on the left and got down on her knees. She wished she thought to bring flowers, Glenn deserved them.

It was then she remembered the balloons in her pocket. It would be an unusual tribute, but Glenn was far from a usual guy. She took her time blowing up the balloons before tying them on the makeshift cross. As the green balloons blew in the wind, Enid couldn’t help but smile. The balloons not only represented Glenn’s return to Alexandria, but also how he helped her begin a new path for herself. Enid couldn’t think of a better way for her to honor the man.

“You’re here.”

Maggie’s voice acted as a melodic alarm for Enid as she scrambled to her feet. She ignored Maggie’s shock over her presence and instead took in her form. With pale skin and a slight shine of sweat on her forehead, Enid could tell Maggie was still fighting off her illness, but she was alive. That’s all that mattered to Enid as she walked over to Maggie and held her hands in her own.

“Are you okay?”

Maggie smiled sadly as she squeezed Enid’s hands. She was so glad she was here, it reminded Maggie that she wasn’t alone. However, taking in her worried expression, Maggie could feel herself crumbling.

“I’m not.” She answered honestly, her voice shaking. “But I will be.”

Enid sympathetically smiled. She knew Maggie could overcome this pain. It would just take time, and luckily, Enid was going to be here for as long as she needed her. As if she could hear her thoughts, Maggie pulled the young girl into a hug. Enid rubbed her back, her heart breaking as she whispered words of encouragement.

“You’re going to be just fine.”  

* * *

 

The trailer Maggie and Sasha were calling ‘home’ was small but offered the necessary amenities; a bed, couch, table, a small bathroom, and enough counter space to be called a kitchen. Enid made a beeline for the kitchenette, ready to prepare the lunch Maggie was dreamily speaking about on their walk up.

“Enid, I’ll do it.”

The girl shook her head. “It’ll only take me a few minutes.”

“You’ve been traveling all day--.”

“To get to you so that I could help.” Enid finished her sentence with a smile. “Sit and relax.”

Maggie let out an exasperated sigh but followed Enid’s orders as she took a seat at the table. As Enid began to prepare the sandwiches and soup, she learned that both Maggie and the baby were healthy, but Doctor Carson wanted her to stay at Hilltop until the baby was born. Enid updated Maggie on Alexandria, how Ava let her go.

“How’s she doing?” Maggie cleared her throat.

Maggie wanted to ask how Ava was handling Daryl’s imprisonment. She wished she knew the answer, but Ava was always hard to read. Enid began stacking the sandwiches on a plate.  

“She’s focusing on Alexandria.” Enid walked the plate to the table. “You know, distracting herself.”

Maggie hummed, picking up a sandwich. “Can’t say I blame her.”

Enid hesitated in stirring the broth. After hearing about what Maggie did for the Hilltop, there was not a doubt in her mind that she was using the same coping mechanism as Ava; solving every problem that isn’t her own. She went back to stirring after asking Maggie to elaborate on how she saved the Hilltop. The story changed the mood of the trailer, and two the girls found themselves in hysterics as Maggie told Enid about the time she ran over a boy’s corvette with a tractor.

It was when Enid was dishing out the soup when Sasha entered the trailer. The woman’s serious expression formed into a smile when she laid eyes on Enid who couldn’t help but smile back. She was relieved to see that Sasha was looking well, no doubt putting away her grief for the sake of helping Maggie.

“I came to help.” Enid explained after they exchanged pleasantries.

Sasha watched as Enid served the soup to the table. “You came by yourself?”  

The question made Enid think about Carl. Her stomach sank when she heard the trucks pulling away, knowing that he was one in one of them, waiting to carry out the mission he bestowed upon himself. She looked between the two women before her, thinking how if anyone deserved to take the man down, it was one of them. However, Enid held her tongue. Telling them about Carl would only add stress to their already suffering minds.

“Don’t worry, Ava knows I’m here.” Enid lightly reassured as she took a seat. “Have some lunch!”

Sasha’s weariness faded as soon as it appeared, and Enid was relieved as she watched Sasha take a seat and grabbed a sandwich. She got away with her lie, and when Maggie led the trio in prayer, Enid prayed that she would see Carl again.

* * *

 

_“You seem worried, so I’m taking the kid home.”_

_“If you do anything to him--.”_

_“Dwight!” Daryl flinched as Negan hit the side of the truck, but he kept his gaze on the man. “Daryl needs a time-out.”_

When Tara woke Ava from her nap with a hard poke to the cheek, she was annoyed.

However, one look at Tara’s stern expression and Olivia’s panicked demeanor told Ava that she was woken up for a reason. She didn’t expect the reason to be that the Saviors were here, and Negan wanted lemonade to go with the dinner he was cooking in Rick’s kitchen. For a moment, Ava wondered if she was trapped in a nightmare.

“Why is he even here?” Ava asked as they searched through Tara’s cabinets. Olivia couldn’t find any in the inventory and Tara was sure she had some leftover. “He can’t expect us to provide if he doesn’t give us a break.”

“He’s waiting for Rick to come back.” Olivia explained from her spot in the pantry. “And he brought Carl home.”

That revelation made Ava pause in her search. Carl was supposed to be at Hilltop with Enid. If Negan had somehow gotten a hold of Carl, did that mean he caught Enid as well? Ava’s heart rate escalated as she shared a look with Tara, the woman looking just as concerned. Ava opened her mouth, wanting to ask the obvious question, but she couldn’t find the right words. She was panicked and thankfully Tara saw the worry and stepped in. 

“Just Carl?” Tara asked for Ava. “Did Negan tell you how he found him?”

 “He’s not exactly the guy I want to have a conversation with.”

Ava sighed. She couldn’t blame Olivia for not getting the scoop from Negan. He can not only be intimidating, but exhausting. After a few more minutes of searching, Tara found Denise’s lemonade stash and handed it over to Olivia. Before the woman departed, Ava stepped up.

“How about I take over?” She asked. “You can go home, relax.”

Although Ava knew Olivia needed a break from Negan, her request was also a bit out of selfishness. She needed to find out if Enid got to Hilltop safely, and the only way she would find out was through Carl or the man himself. Surprisingly, Olivia shook her head.

“I promised Rick I’d watch Judith.” Her voice wavered. “That’s what I’m going to do.”

Ava couldn’t say she wasn’t proud of Olivia for stepping up, she just wished it was at a different time.

“Ava can be good backup.” Tara elaborated, and Ava sent her a look of thanks. “You’ll watch Judith, she’ll watch Negan.”

Olivia seemed to light up as she turned to Ava. “You…you sure it won’t be too much trouble?”

“I can handle it.” Ava calmly reassured. “He’s just a man.”

A man with homicidal tendencies. Ava hoped he was in a good mood.

* * *

“You going to be honest with me or do I have to pat you down?”

Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes as the Savior surveyed her body, scanning for any signs of weaponry. It seemed that she and Tara missed a lot during their little cat naps; the Saviors were stationed all around Alexandria, their own guns at the ready in case a resident decided to be bold. Luckily, it seemed that everyone was staying in their own spaces, Tara deciding to check up on the community while Ava dealt with the big man himself.

At least, that was the plan until she was stopped at the bottom of Rick’s porch. Ava gave the woman a sickening sweet smile.

“You took all of our guns so,” She dramatically shrugged. “I’m clean.”

The Savior narrowed her eyes and Olivia cringed from her own spot on the porch. Ava knew the comment was risky, but she didn’t care. All she wanted was to get in there, find out what she needed to know about Enid, and get out.

“Ah, Olivia! I was about to send out a search party after you.”

Ava didn’t hear the creaking of the door, but there he was. Negan stepped onto the porch, his smile wide as he teased Olivia with a good-nature tone, as if they were friends and threaten her life for the sake of a lesson. His presence made Ava want to vomit, but when he looked over at her and smiled wider, she realized she needed to keep her true feelings to herself.

He wanted to toy with her more, and Ava was more than willing to let him just to get inside.

“This is why I like you, Olivia.” Negan pointed down at the woman. “I ask you for lemonade, and you go the extra mile.” Ava pursed her lips as Negan turned to her. “Ava, right?” 

Ava didn’t know what she hated more; the fact that he remembered, or that he was pretending to be clueless. She forced a polite smile.

“You remembered.”

“Oh, you’re hard to forget.” He winked, and Ava swallowed bile. “Let her through, Arat. _Ava_ knows if she tries anything, it won’t be her taking the punishment.”

Ava’s body went cold. One step out of line and Daryl would be the one getting tortured. She could see it: Negan commanding Dwight to commit awful acts to the man she missed, telling him that she was the reason he was on the receiving end. Ava clenched her jaw as she shook the thoughts from her head. Instead she focused on Arat begrudgingly moving aside to let Ava up the steps.

“Carl was just setting the table!” Negan practically bounced. “Hope you like spaghetti, made it myself.”

Ava merely nodded, her mind still reeling as she thought of Daryl. Negan chuckled before placing a steady hand on her back and leading her inside the house. Olivia was already in the kitchen, Judith resting on her hip as she stirred the lemonade. Carl was busying himself with the plate settings. Ava wanted to scoff. It was a perfect scene of domesticity or would be if not for the man behind her.

“Add another setting,” Negan’s booming voice made everyone pause in their actions. “We got a guest!”

Carl looked over and instantly paled at the sight of Ava. She sent the boy a look that he had seen many times from his own father when he had misbehaved; _“I don’t know what you did, but I already know I don’t like it.”_ While Negan took a seat at the table, Ava followed Carl into the kitchen. He reached up into the cabinet, handing it over to her.

“Hilltop treat you well?” Ava whispered, an accusatory tone in her voice.

“Enid made it. I watched her go in.”

Ava glanced over at Negan, making sure he wasn’t paying them any mind. He was busy tormenting poor Olivia, making her serve him lemonade while he made funny faces at Judith. Rick would have a fit.

“Great.” Ava was relieved to hear that Enid was safe with Maggie and Sasha. Now she could focus her energy on Carl. “And after that you, what? Took a scenic walk to see our pal over there?”

One eye darted to Negan. “This isn’t the time.”

As if on cue, the familiar booming voice raddled the house. “What’s the hold up, kiddos?”

The pair shared a look. They needed to keep Negan happy. For Alexandria’s sake. For Daryl’s sake. Ava and Carl made their way back to the table. As Carl sat down in his usual spot, Ava went to go next to him. However, she froze when Negan made a ‘tut’ sound with his mouth. Her heart sank as she watched him pat the seat next to him.

“Lucille moved over _just_ for you.”

To cover her desire to roll her eyes, Ava blinked. He wasn’t lying. The bat that was once resting on the chair next to him was now seated beside Olivia. He raised his brows, daring her to defy him. Ava noticed that he shaved his beard, making his smile that much more prominent. She wanted to smack it off.

Ava bit the inside of her cheek. Keep Negan happy, keep Daryl unharmed. Ava picked up her utensils and granted Negan’s wish. He chuckled, Carl sent over a look of sympathy, and Olivia looked like she was about to cry. Ava wanted to die.  

“’Atta girl!” He turned to Carl. “Now we just gotta wait for Daddy, then we can feast!”

Silence took over the house, the only sound being Judith’s soft snores. Ava crossed her legs, hoping that Rick decided to cut his scavenging trip short. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, I'm devastated about Andrew Lincoln leaving the show, but I get it. He poured 9 years of emotions into The Walking Dead. Homeboy deserves a break. That being said, I don't know if Daryl can handle the leader role. What do ya'll think?
> 
> Also, seems like a good time to point out that neither Carl OR Rick will be dying in this fic. The writers can do what they want, but I NEED MAH GRIMES BOYS!
> 
> Hope ya'll enjoyed!


	32. Blame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava deals with Negan in Alexandria.

_When Enid was ten she snuck a drink from their parents’ bar. Her lips were around a wine bottle when Ava walked in. She had her earbuds in, some indie band blaring, but she heard the glass shatter after Enid dropped the bottle. The red liquid exploded onto the carpet. Ava rushed over to Enid, instantly comforting the girl as she wailed._

_“They’re going to hate me!” She spoke between sobs._

_Even though Ava knew that was impossible, she couldn’t bear to see her sister in pain. When their mom came home she took the blame for the incident. Ava was grounded for three weeks._

“God damn! I forgot how good I am at cooking,” Negan exclaimed as he scrapped the fork against his plate. “I shouldn’t waste my time with the cooks back at home. What do you think, Carl?”

Carl nodded, his eye meeting Ava’s as she took a long drink from her glass of lemonade. As expected, Negan got bored of waiting for Rick to arrive and commenced dinner. Rick's absence didn’t sour his mood, in fact, it seemed to do just the opposite. Negan chowed down on the food, seemingly unaware of the awkward tension around the table as he made joyful conversation.

Ava was starting to think he thrived on it. He thrived on watching Olivia clutch onto Judith as if she was a raft in the middle of a crushing ocean. Carl’s hateful stare made him more powerful. Most of all, Ava thought he got a kick out of questioning her about life in Alexandria.

“So, what is your role around here?” Negan asked, turning to Ava. “You were in the Infirmary last time, but you don’t seem like the bedside manner type.”

Ava wanted to ask him what the ‘bedside manner type’ looked like, but she stopped herself. He seemed to be a fan of sass, but she had a feeling Negan had a limit. A limit she didn’t want to reach for Daryl's sake.

“I’m wherever I need to be,” Ava wasn’t about to tell him that she was one of the best fighters and scavengers in the community.

“Resourceful.” He picked up his glass. “I like it.”

 The table watched as Negan took a long drink, his gaze never wavering from Ava as he chuckled into the glass. She didn’t want to know what he was thinking. Sadly, she had a few guesses.

“And _young_ ,” He continued examining Ava as if she was under a microscope. “You’re like, what? Twenty?”

“Twenty-three.”

Ava picked up a roll but had no intention to eat it. She was beginning to fidget and needed something in her hands. Without it, she was sure she would punch him in the face. Negan slapped a hand to the table, startling Olivia and stirring Judith.

He gleefully announced, “I was close!” 

She continued ripping at her roll until it was inedible, “Congratulations.”

“You look just as young as that darling sister of yours,” He shook his head in feign disbelief. “Emily wasn’t it?”

From across the table, Ava could see Carl tense up. She couldn’t blame the kid since she felt her own muscles get tight. Enid was safe. Ava kept repeating that in her mind.

 “Enid.” Ava politely corrected.

“Enid. _Christ,_ ” He huffed out a laugh, unable to believe a parent would do that to their child. “What’s she up to?”

Telling Negan where Enid was couldn’t happen. Not only may it put her in danger, but it would also tip off Negan that Alexandria and Hilltop were technically in an alliance. Whenever Rick decided to fight back they would need reinforcements from the farming community. Ava gave a tight smile.

“Out checking the traps with a few guys,” She weaved a lie. “Probably won’t be back for a while.”

Negan sighed, looking genuinely disappointed that Enid would not be joining them today. He was probably hoping to play more mind games between the siblings. He twisted pasta around his fork.

“Well, send her my love.”

Ava and Carl looked at one another with stares that could only be described as _“Can you believe this bastard?”_ However, Ava didn’t let it show as she took another sip of her drink.

“Oh, I will.”

* * *

 

**_‘Go Now’._ **

_Daryl stared at the note in his hands, taking in the swirling letters and key taped to the lined paper. He watched Negan leave but he knew it could still be a trap. Another test. He leaned against the brick wall, closing his eyes. He should stay to avoid another beating. To trick Negan and Dwight into thinking he was finally getting broken down. In the darkness of his mind, Daryl could see Carl’s terrified face as Negan burned the face of a Savior. He could see Rick weeping over his son’s body, begging Negan to let Carl walk away. He heard Maggie’s screams._

_He saw Ava sobbing, her eyes never leaving his as Dwight dragged him to the van._

_Daryl stood up. It was time to go._

Although lunch ended a few moments ago, Maggie was still at the table eating whatever was left. Enid busied herself by washing the dishes, a soft smile on her lips as she listened to her chewing. Sasha had told her it was a relief that the mother-to-be had a huge appetite; it meant that the baby was healthy and growing.

“Is that an apple pie?”

Enid giggled. It was going to be a big baby. She turned around, watching as Maggie used a spatula to get a piece before beginning to eat it. Sasha and Enid shared a look of disbelief.

“Uh, do you want a plate?” Enid held up a freshly cleaned plate.

She waved her off. “I’m fine,” Maggie turned to Sasha. “Did Jesus already leave? I had a few more things to add to his list; pencils, paper for the kids to draw with.”

“He just left.”

Enid frowned. Sasha was lying. When Enid went out to get soap, Terry had told her that Jesus left this morning and that he considered himself a ‘wanderer.’ Why lie to Maggie? Enid decided she needed to find out when Maggie left to find some milk to go with her pie. 

“It’s for her own good,” Sasha reassured.

She scoffed, “Heard that before.”

Sasha pursed her lips. Enid could tell she was trying not to get too angry with her.

“I need to do something," She explained. “Maggie would want to help me and she can’t in her condition.”

Enid crossed her arms, "You want to kill Negan,” When Sasha didn’t answer, Enid shook her head, “What if you had help?”

“If I had a lot of people then I wouldn’t be afraid to tell her.” Sasha admitted, “But for now, it’s just me.”

“You and Maggie aren’t the only ones who want to take Negan out.” Enid thought of all of Alexandria, Ava, and Carl. “Ava’s a good shot. Let her--.”

Sasha put a hand up, “If you care about Maggie, don’t say anything about this. We have to keep her safe.” She placed a gentle hand on her arm, “You have to keep her safe.”

Enid swallowed the rest of her words. Even if Sasha had Ava, or anyone’s help, if Maggie knew about it she would want to be apart of it. However, it wouldn’t just be her in danger, but also the baby. Enid had to think about her health. It was why she was here. She ran a hand through her hair.

“It isn’t just you,” She repeated.

Enid was sure Rick wanted to end Negan, but even he knew they couldn’t do it now. It may take years before it’s a good time. Sasha shook her head before making her way to the couch and plopping down.

“It sure looks like it.”

* * *

 

_Enid felt guilty. Ava was being punished for what she did—all because she wanted to have a taste of what the adults got. She thought about confessing, but Enid wasn’t about to get grounded right before Jane’s birthday party. They were going to laser tag—she couldn’t miss that!_

_Instead, the little sister waited until their parents were asleep the following Friday night before sneaking into Ava’s room. She jumped, but Ava’s fear was replaced with love when Enid handed her the portable DVD player. She grinned before patting the spot on the bed next to her._

_Enid and Ava stayed up until three in the morning watching FRIENDS. To this day, it was still one of Ava’s favorite memories._

The late afternoon sun shone over the seemingly empty streets of Alexandria. It would’ve been a sight Ava enjoyed if not for the man sitting in the rocking chair next to hers. Negan hummed as he sipped the last of the lemonade, a satisfied smile on his face as he surveyed the community. _His community_ , Ava thought bitterly.

She didn’t understand why he wanted her to sit with him while Carl and Olivia cleaned up his mess. At first, Ava feared that he was going to subject her to more questions—specific ones about Rick, Daryl, and Enid. Except for the occasion hum or content sigh, Negan hadn’t spoken a word to her. Her relief quickly turned into discomfort. What was he thinking? What did he want?

Ava wanted to get out of here.

“I should help them—.”

“Sit that perky ass back down,” He lightly chided. “They can handle it.”

Ava was tempted to ignore his command but thought better of it. He wouldn’t do anything to her if she disobeyed, but he would unleash a world of hurt on Daryl. She plopped back down on the seat, trying her best to not appear tense.

“Why do you even want me out here?” She asked, her gaze still on the street.

Negan shrugged, “I like looking at beautiful women,” Ava wanted to gag, “And you look like you could use a break.”

“No offense but being with you is far from relaxing.”

He placed a hand to his heart, his expression mockingly portraying offensive. Ava would’ve laughed if he was anyone else. Instead, she merely shrugged, making Negan chuckle.

“I think we’re going to be great friends, Ava.”

She rolled her eyes and was about to say something when Rosita caught her eye. The woman walked past Rick’s house, sending a glare to the occupants of the porch as she continued towards her own home. Getting a glare from Rosita wasn’t unusual for Ava, and yet she felt her heart drop to her stomach. An alarm going off in her brain. Something was going on. Ava stood up from her chair.

“What did I just say?” Negan’s tone mirrored one of exhaustion.

“I just remembered I promised Enid I would be waiting at home for her.” Ava’s lie was so smooth she even shocked herself, “I should check to see if she’s back. I don’t want her to worry.”

He studied her for a moment, and Ava feared that she spoke too quickly to be innocent. Luckily, it seemed that Negan had a soft spot for kids and he gently waved Ava off. She thanked him before taking off down the porch steps and following in Rosita’s footsteps.

As expected, the woman was already home, lounging on her porch swing. When Ava came into view, she scoffed.

“Got bored of your friend?”

“Cut it out.” Ava warned, her tone full of venom, “You know we have to keep him happy.”

“Right. You said that before.”

Ava exhaled through her nostrils. She didn’t come here to fight Rosita, but it was always so tempting. She walked up the stairs but stopped on the second step.

“What are you planning?” Ava always found it best to cut to the chase.

Rosita crossed her arms, “Who’s says I’m planning anything?”

Ava narrowed her eyes. Rosita may think little of her, but she knew the woman in front of her wasn’t stupid. She pursed her lips before standing up from the swing and walked closer to Ava.

“You want him dead just as much as I do?” She asked, earning a nod from Ava. “Then help me.”

It was then Rosita pulled a pistol from the waistband of her jeans. Ava swallowed a gasp, instead moving closer to Rosita to conceal the weapon. Luckily, there were next to no Saviors on this street. The ones who were around seemed too busy goofing off than guarding, but they were still eyes for Negan.

“I only have one bullet.” She continued, “But it’s all I need.”

 “You have one bullet to take him down,” Ava bit out. “What about when the rest of the Saviors start firing at you?”

“As long as he goes first, who cares?”

“I do."

Rosita blinked, a bit surprised by Ava’s cry. Ava ran a hand through her hair, checking that the Saviors were still looking away before huddling closer to Rosita.

“This can’t be done by one person. We’re going to need everyone to take down Negan and his followers,” Ava tried to breakthrough. “You’re a part of that.”

She didn’t speak, and Ava could tell that was in her favor. Cautiously, Ava placed a hand on Rosita’s shoulder. Surprisingly, she didn’t even flinch or make a disgusted face. She just kept looking at Ava.

“We’ll have our moment, even if we have to make it.” Ava continued, “It’s not today. It can’t be today.”

She blinked again, and it was then Ava noticed her tearful eyes. Rosita knew she was right, and she hated Ava for it.

“Give me the gun, okay?” Ava gently asked as she put a hand out.

Rosita looked down at the weapon. The only gun left in Alexandria. With a sigh, she handed it over to Ava, knowing it would be safer in her keeping. Ava stuffed it into the waistband of her pants before tucking her shirt over it.

“Thank you.”

“Whatever,” Rosita wiped at her eyes and Ava had to conceal a smile. The woman would never admit it, but Ava knew her words meant a lot to her.

 It was then the sound of a garage door opening cut through the silence of the community. Rosita groaned.

“What now?"

* * *

 

_Daryl grunted as he brought the pipe down. He beat the man until he was unrecognizable, until his own pain became unrecognizable. He was thankful that Jesus wasn’t trying to stop him. He needed this._

_“It ain’t about getting by here,” Daryl growled down at the corpse. “It’s about getting it all.”_

_Picking up a familiar weapon, Daryl nodded towards the bikes. He was doing it. He was free._

Ava left Negan alone for five minutes, perhaps even less. However, it only took five minutes for Spencer to get his claws in the leader and invite him to play a game of pool. Tara and Eugene were among the crowd that the activity was drawing. Rosita glanced over at Ava, giving a small nod. It was obvious Spencer was up to something but Ava had a feeling that only she and Rosita knew the depths of his thinking.

While the Saviors were busying getting the table set up, Ava caught the arm of the Monroe son as he moved to follow Negan to the area. She matched his annoyed stare with a glare.

“Don’t do something that’ll cost us all.”

He rolled his eyes, “Rick’s ego already cost us everything.”

She scoffed, dropping his arm as if it was toxic before making her way over to Rosita who only shook her head.  Ava didn’t know why she wasted her time on Spencer. He was always going to do what he needed to do to get what he wanted—and he wanted to be the leader. Spencer’s intentions became clear to the rest of the community the moment Negan did the break shot.

“You’re making people contribute to the greater good. Makes sense.” Spencer fawned over Negan as the leader moved around the table, “But you should know that Rick Grimes has a history of not working well with others.”

Ava closed her eyes. She couldn’t bear to watch Spencer do the exact opposite of her request. She swallowed a groan as Spencer told Negan his story—the deaths of his family. Everyone mourned the Monroe family; Ava saw the sorrowful expression on Rick’s face when Deanna died, how they stayed with her for as long as they could. It made Ava sick that Spencer was blaming a man his mother respected for her demise.

“Rick shows up and suddenly you’re an orphan?” Negan questioned before taking a sip of whiskey. “That’s the saddest story I ever heard. Lucky for you, he isn’t in charge anymore.”

Spencer watched as Negan readied another shot, “Doesn’t matter. His ego is out of control.” If Spencer wanted to see an inflated ego, Ava thought he should get a mirror, “He’ll find a way to take over. That’s what he did to my mom and that’s what he’ll do to you.”

He leaned, ready to take another shot. Negan raised his brows before taking a long sip of whiskey. Over the rim Ava met his gaze, and he couldn’t help but smirk as he lowered his glass. Ava’s heart dropped.

“I should put you in charge,” Negan’s voice went dangerously low. “That’s what you’re saying?”

Spencer grinned, “We’d be much better off.”

Negan moved closer to Spencer, speaking in a low enough register that Ava couldn’t hear. However, she could see the tension in his jaw. Negan was angry, but he wasn’t about to show it. Ava met Tara’s gaze, taking in her terrified expression. This was the first time Tara was seeing the big man in action and Ava could practically feel her tense body.

“If you wanna take over, why not just kill Rick and just take over?!” Negan’s voice rumbled, and Ava was sure she felt the street vibrate underneath her.

Any confidence that Spencer seemed to fade away. Ava watched the man become flustered, stuttering out an attempt to take back his argument. Negan advanced on him and Ava’s knees trembled. Maybe she could shut this down, tell everyone to go home. If he didn’t have an audience…

“You know what I’m thinking, ‘cause I have a guess,” He glanced back to the crowd, making sure they were watching, before turning back to Spencer. “It’s because you got no guts.”

It happened fast. Fast enough that Ava didn’t realize that Negan stabbed Spencer until he slid the blade across his stomach, gutting the boy like a fish. Her body shook as she watched him fall to the pavement, holding his guts in his hands as he fell over onto the burning pavement.

Her ears were ringing, her mouth agape. Ava didn’t hear the screams of terror, Olivia’s gasp, or Negan’s attempts to provoke the crowd further. All she could do was stare as Spencer bled out on the concrete, the life leaving his eyes. One moment he was here, and now he was gone.

And Negan laughed. He laughed the same way he did that night he killed Abe and Glenn. The same night he took Daryl. The night he took everything.

She didn’t register Rosita calling her name, her movements robotic as she took the gun out of her pants and fired.

“Shit! What the shit?!”

It was as if Negan’s anger was a wakeup call. Ava slowly lowered the gun, the weapon now heavy in her hand. There was no way this was happening. It had to be a nightmare. However, it all felt too real when Arat tackled her and Negan came stomping over. Any favoritism Ava feared he had towards her was gone; his face was red, eyes glaring as he stood over her body.

“Did you just try to kill me?!” He raged, “You shot Lucille!”

Ava didn’t speak. Anything she said would only be used against Alexandria. Instead she glared up at him, hoping her trembling body wasn’t noticeable. Negan took a few breaths before bending down and picking up the casing.

“This little bad boy made from scratch?” He examined. “This was homemade. Arat, move that knife up to that girl’s face.” Ava took a breath when she felt the blade weighed on her skin, “A scar for a scar. Unless you can tell me, who made this.”

She had an idea on who could construct a bullet, but even if Ava knew for sure, she wouldn’t reveal the information to Negan. She was the one who made the dumb decision to pull the trigger. It was her punishment to bare. Ava licked her dry lips.

“I'm the one who did it,” She spoke harshly, "It doesn't matter who helped."

Negan chuckled darkly, “It’ll be selfish for you to take all the credit, now wouldn’t it?”

Ava resisted the urge to look at Rosita. It wasn’t like she could. It seemed that the entire community took a step back when she hit the ground.

“It was me,” Ava desperately lied, “It was all me. No one else knew.”

“You’re lying to me, _now_?!”

The rage Negan had just come down from made a brief reappearance. He ran a hand down his face, smearing Spencer’s blood onto his chin.

“That is a shame. I thought we were having a connection earlier, Ava.” He paused, waiting for her to budge.

When it became clear that she wasn’t going to speak anymore, he sighed.

“Arat. Kill somebody.”

Ava’s eyes widened the moment Arat removed the knife from her face.

“Wait, please!”

She went to grab the Savior’s arm, but it was too late. Olivia’s lifeless body dropped onto the Grimes’ porch, Carl diving after her. Ava's body shook in shock. Olivia was gone, all because of her own lack of self-control. She sat up, resting her elbows on her knees and tangled her hands in her hair. Deep breaths.

“We had an agreement!”

Rick’s voice only made Ava want to cry. She couldn’t look at him. Seeing Rick’s horrified expression would only make everything feel more real. Ava failed him. She failed all of them.

“...And this little one, here?” Ava tuned back into the conversation just in time to watch Negan gesture down to her, “ _She_ shot Lucille trying to kill me so I gave you one less mouth to feed!”

Ava peeled her eyes on the pavement and reluctantly met Rick’s gaze. He looked more surprised than disappointed that it was Ava who tried to take out the man. Out of everyone in Alexandria, she was probably the last person he expected to pull such a stupid move. Ava couldn’t blame him. She thought the same.

Rick turned back to Negan, leveling a glare at him. Ava held her breath as Negan smirked. He was waiting for Rick to give him another reason to kill, and all Ava could do was pray that the leader wouldn’t fall for it. He let out a harsh breath.

“Your shit is waiting for you at the gate,” He hissed, “Just go.”

“Sure thing, Rick.” Negan spoke with a breezy tone before holding up the bullet, “Right after I find the guy or gal that made this bullet. Arat?”

Ava shivered when Arat pointed the gun at Eric and Aaron. She didn’t want anyone else to die because of her mistake.

“It was me!”

Ava turned to see Rosita stepping forward. Tara gently grabbed her arm as Arat trained her gun on the pair. Rosita wasn’t afraid. She looked at Ava, pity in her eyes. Maybe Rosita thought she owed her for their earlier conversation. However, the intervention was ignored due to Eugene’s immediate confession. All Ava could do was stare as he listed off the materials needed to make the bullet. She had a feeling it was Eugene—no one else had that kind of mind, and if they did, they wouldn’t have cracked under the pressure Rosita delivered the way Eugene did.

Despite her fear, Ava could feel a slight swell of pride in her chest. It would’ve been easy for Eugene to let Rosita take the blame, or to have Ava continue to be on the receiving end of punishments, but he stepped up. That took a lot of courage, especially for someone like him.  

“I’m going to be relieving you of your bullet-maker, Rick,” Negan’s words took Ava off guard. “And however much you scavenged it’s not good enough, because you’re still in a serious hole after today.”

The burning in Ava’s eyes returned and she fixed her gaze to the ground. Eugene may have made the bullet, but it was all her fault that he was going to be taken. She should have brought the gun home, hid it in the closet. None of this would have happened. The surrounding Saviors began making their way towards the gate, Arat dragging Eugene along. Negan’s boots came into her view. He hesitated beside her.

“Oh!” He feigned a casual tone. “I almost forgot…”

It was then Ava felt a firm grip around her arm, pulling her to her feet. Negan glared down at her with a stone-cold expression. It made a shiver run up her spine.

“I’m going to be taking the Sharpshooter, too.” His words were to Rick, but his eyes never left Ava’s. “She and I need to discuss why this shit won’t fly.”

Ava tore her gaze away from him and looked to Rick. The leader had a panicked expression on his face; he couldn’t lose anymore people today.

“You don’t have to,” Rick tried to reason, “I’ll…I’ll come up with a punishment--.”

The word sounded foreign on his lips and Negan could tell.

“And what is a ‘Rick Grimes Punishment’?” He interrupted with a scoff, “Babysitting duty? I got better ideas.”

He looked back down at Ava, but she couldn’t look at him. She didn’t want him to see how afraid she was. The minute Negan noticed was the moment he gained all the power. Instead she focused on Rick; the tears in his blue eyes as he looked at her with sympathy. They knew better than to waste their time with fighting. Negan made his choice and Rick lowered his head in submission.

“Let’s move out!”

Ava tripped over herself as Negan began walking, dragging her along as if she was a doll. To him she was—a new plaything to ruin. She could hear Rosita begging to be taken, but Negan never hesitated. Ava didn’t look back either. If she did, she would never be able to leave. When they got to the gates, Negan whistled. In response, a man handed him a black bag.

His grip on her arm grew tighter and Ava had to swallow a whimper. His breath tickled her skin as he leaned in close to her ear. 

“Let’s see how strong you _really_ are.”

She could hear the underscore of a threat. A promise of horrible things to come; a promise of a punishment she deserved. He leaned away from her ear with a dark smirk. It was the last sight she took in before the bag was pulled over her head, embedding her in darkness.

* * *

 

Today was a good day.

Not only was Enid learning about Hilltop, but she was also getting to know the people. Besides Gregory, they were open to her presence, even giving her a few free gifts. One of these gifts was a knife from Earl, the community’s blacksmith. After showing the weapon to Sasha, the woman took out her own knife and began to show Enid a few moves.

It was during this practice session when Maggie yelled for Enid and Sasha to come to the gates. The pair ran as quickly as they could, worried that Maggie was in some sort of danger. However, Enid’s fear faded the moment she saw Rick, Michonne, Tara, Rosita, and Carl walking through the gates.

She smiled as the groups greeted one another; Carl gave her a tight hug, his way of apologizing for leaving her in the dust. Enid fought back tears as Daryl embraced Rick. Seeing Daryl walk through the gates with Jesus was a shock, but she was thrilled as the man wrapped her into a hug.

_“I’m staying here to help Maggie.” Enid informed him._

_She smirked as Daryl peeked over her head, “Is…Ava here?”_

_“She’s coming later.”_

It was then Enid realized someone was missing. Ava wouldn’t miss a chance to go to the Hilltop, especially now that Enid was here, and Rick was ready to fight. Maybe she needed to stay on watch.

“Did Ava stay behind?” Enid asked the group.

The air shifted from one of greetings and high morale to solemnness. She looked towards Carl, the boy frowning as he avoided her eyes. Enid’s heart sank to her stomach. Something was wrong. Why was no one telling her where her sister was? It was as if Daryl channeled her frustration as he turned to the leader.

“Rick?” Daryl looked at him, awaiting an explanation.

He looked between Daryl and Enid, hating that he had to be the one to break the news. He opened his mouth, but Rosita stopped him. She felt that Ava and Eugene got taken because of her—because she just couldn’t sit and wait for their moment. Now the moment was here, and they weren’t. If she was the reason this happened, she felt that she had to be the one to break the news.

“Negan took Ava.”

Rosita continued, explaining why she was taken, but Enid couldn’t hear her. Her sister was in the hands of madman, and there wasn’t anything they could do to stop it. Enid put a hand to her forehead, trying to control herself. She couldn’t burst into tears. Ava wouldn’t want that. Ava would want her to stay focused.

It was then she felt a hand on her shoulder, and Enid looked up to see Daryl behind her. His jaw was clenched, and Enid was sure he was just as upset. He had broken out of his cell just to find out that Ava was about to be put in one herself. Daryl leveled a stare on the group in front of him, his family.

“We’ll get her back.”

And after seeing the flash of rage in Daryl’s eyes, Enid knew it was only a matter of time until Ava was in her arms again. 


	33. Locked

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava is welcomed to the Sanctuary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The timeline is weird but so is the show's so don't @ me. :P
> 
> Also, I'm heading out of town until July so this will be the last update for awhile. Have a great month, ya'll!

Enid sat alone on the steps of Barrington House, ignoring the hustle of the residents as they completed their daily chores. She should’ve been helping them, trying to create her own routine at the colony, but Enid couldn’t get herself up. All she could do was stare at the gate across the way and wait.

The optimistic—foolish—side of her was waiting for Ava to walk through those doors with a huge grin on her face. Enid smiled as she thought of Ava hugging her, explaining how she got away from the Saviors. However, the truthful side of her knew that she wasn’t going to see Ava for a long time.

_“We’ll get her back.”_

Daryl’s words rang in Enid’s ears. Sure, she believed in him, but Enid wasn’t an idiot. Ava and Eugene were not just prisoners of Negan, but they were now leverage. After Negan realizes that Daryl escaped, Enid had no doubt he would keep a constant watch on them. To make sure they were around when he had to remind Rick on who was in charge.

Enid saw Daryl’s condition. Would Negan do that to a woman? 

“What’s going on in there?”

Enid welcomed the distraction as a group of four came walking up to her. She recognized one of the women as Birdie. Enid hoped she didn’t look as bad as she felt as she took a breath.

“Maggie is trying to convince Gregory to stand with Alexandria.” She decided to be honest, “The leader wants to fight the Saviors.”

Birdie looked to her friends and Enid noticed the nervous expressions. It was unspoken, but they all knew what the meeting was truly about; if Gregory agreed, they would all have to fight. It was the only way they could get the numbers.  Birdie looked back to Enid, a sheepish look on her face.

“We only know how to fight the dead,” She let out a nervous laugh, “Some of us barely that.”

Enid took a moment to examine the group that was beginning to assemble around her. They were inexperienced, most of them only had skills meant for farming, but they were willing to learn. Enid could tell they wanted to fight, they just needed a proper teacher. Lucky for them, there was one inside.

“Maggie will show you the way,” Enid stood up on one of the stairs. “She and Sasha know how to fight. You all saw what they did the other night, right? They can teach you.”

They were quiet, but Enid didn’t miss the small smiles forming. They wanted to do this, and Enid smiled herself when she realized they could.

* * *

 

The convoy drove down the road, each bump amplified due to the silence within the vehicle and the darkness surrounding Ava. She swallowed a yelp of pain as she felt a Savior next to her tighten the rope around her wrists—she then had to bury her angry when she heard him chuckle. She had to keep herself in check, to show the Saviors that their fear tactics wouldn’t work on her.

It seemed that Eugene had a different strategy.

A muffled sob broke through and Ava rolled her eyes. Eugene had been crying since they pulled out of Alexandria. As annoyed as Ava was with the outpouring of emotion, she couldn’t be too hard on him. She was on the verge of tears herself, but Ava wasn’t about to start weeping in front of the Saviors. Ava needed to show them that she wasn’t afraid. That she was ready to fight for those she left behind.

And for the man waiting for her. With Daryl’s help, Ava was confident they could find a way to get out.

Ava was calm when the truck lurched to a stop, her breathing even despite the rough hands that pulled her out of her seat and walked her to the back. The bag heated up at the contact with the late afternoon sun, and Ava found herself sweating profusely again as she was pushed down from the vehicle.

“Hope Negan doesn’t want this one,” She heard one of the men whisper behind her as her feet connected with the dirt. “That ass is too good not to be shared.”

Ava’s blood boiled as she listened to the men chuckle. She swallowed her pride; maybe it was better to keep quiet, to stay in line. However, when she felt one of the men graze her bottom, Ava couldn’t resist.

The moment the bag came off her head, Ava made the back of her head collide with the man’s nose.

She ignored the shouts and sounds of guns being drawn as she started to kick him in the dirt, letting out her aggression until a pair of arms wrapped around her waist and forced her away from the Savior.

“You’re just asking for trouble.” Arat sneered in her ear.

As much as Ava hated to admit it, she knew the female Savior was right. All she was doing was making life harder for herself. Ava just couldn’t bring herself to care. The punishment was worth getting to watch that man slither away with a bloody nose.

At least it was until Negan came strolling up to her, offering a dramatic slow clap.

“ _You_ are such a badass!” He cheered before moving close to her. “The problem is, I only like badasses when they answer to me. Guess we’ll have to get you there, huh?”

Ava froze as he lightly traced the curve of her jaw. She knew better than to take another shot at the big man, especially when they were on his turf, but it was tempting. Instead, she glared as he grinned, his eyes studying her.

“See how long it takes to break you,” He let his fingers rest on her jaw. “I wonder if it’ll take as long lover boy in there.”

Ava huffed out air at the mention of Daryl. Negan was clearly satisfied with the reaction as he removed his hand and chuckled. Still looking at Ava, he spoke to Arat.

“Put her in the hole.”

* * *

 

“You really don’t want to come?”

Enid couldn’t help but smile as Carl asked her if she wanted to come to the Kingdom for the millionth time. Although he would never say it outright, Enid knew he was worried about her. Worried that she would drive herself crazy thinking of what could be happening to Ava. Enid handed Carl a box of supplies to be loaded into one of the cars they were taking.

“I’m going to stay here, help Maggie rally the troops.”

Although Gregory refused to be apart of the rebellion, the residents of Hilltop were ready to fight. They just needed to learn how first. Maggie was staying behind to form a training schedule and she wanted to help. The fact that it would be a welcomed distraction was only a plus.

“It’ll be good to focus on something else.” 

Carl nodded but then frowned, “I’m sorry.”

A small part of Carl blamed himself for Ava and Eugene's kidnapping. If he hadn’t tried to take Negan out himself, the leader would have never went back to Alexandria. Ava would have never had the chance to pull the trigger and Olivia would still be alive. Enid sighed. She was tired of people apologizing for Ava being taken.

“You don’t need to apologize, no one does,” Enid added as she looked over to Rosita, “The only person to blame is Negan.”

Carl merely nodded, and Enid knew her words weren’t enough for him. She hoped it was at least a start. Enid watched as he closed the trunk, saying goodbye before heading to meet up with Michonne and Rick. Enid was about to go find Maggie when Daryl came walking up to her. They stared at one another in silence for a bit, and Enid wondered if he expected her to talk first. Thankfully, he didn’t.

“You okay?”

 “No,” She admitted, letting out a humorless laugh, “You?”

“I will be, once we get her back.” He nodded to her, “You will, too.”

Enid nodded, wishing she could feel better now. As if sensing her frustration, Daryl continued.

“Let me know if you need anything, alright?”

She grinned, “Same to you, Daryl.”

With a pat on her shoulder, Daryl left Enid to meet up with the rest of the group. Enid watched as he left with a smile. It was nice not to feel alone.

* * *

 

“Shut up.”

Ava whispered the words through chapped lips, knowing that saying them any louder would be futile. The music was muffled, no doubt meant for another prisoner, but it was enough to make Ava want to break her skull against the brick wall she was resting upon. Ava felt like a child, maybe that was the point. 

She wasn’t sure how long she had been locked away. Ava had watched the light from underneath the door turn on and off at least four times—did that mean four days? Were they messing with her? Did they _want_ her to think that they were messing with her?

Ava let out a dry laugh. She was being ridiculous. Speculating only made things worse, it only made Negan win. She needed to focus on what she knew.

She knew that her hands were beginning to feel numb thanks to the rope around her wrists and that she would kill for a drink of water. She also knew that Enid was worried sick about her. Ava hoped that her little sister didn’t know—Enid didn’t need to add more weight to her baggage. However, knowing Carl, he most likely traveled to Hilltop to fill her in on Negan's visit.

Just thinking of Enid reminded Ava why she needed to stand her ground. Ava could survive this, get home, and see her again. She just needed to be as strong as her little sister.

Ava’s internal pep talk was interrupted when she heard the lock on her door turn. She adjusted herself until she was sitting upright against the wall, as if that would help her look put together. Ava squinted, her eyes struggling to adjust to the light, but she could make out the silhouette of a burly man.

“Remember me?”

It wasn’t Negan but taking in the sight of a bandaged nose and wicked smile, Ava did recognize him. She glared up at him.

“The guy who can’t keep his hands to himself.”

Ava tried to sound nonchalant, but her voice was weak from disuse. The man simply chuckled.

“Name’s David.” He walked more into the cell, “And you owe me.”

It was then it all clicked for Ava. He was one of the men who ransacked the Infirmary on Negan’s first visit. Ava decided to keep that information to herself; she didn’t want his ego to get even more inflated due to her rememberance.

“Another beating?” Ava asked, sarcasm dripping from her tone. “Because, no offense, it doesn’t look like you can take much more.”

“You’re funny,” He drawled as he crouched down to the ground in front of Ava’s feet. “Let’s see if that mouth is good at something else.”

Before Ava could react, David grabbed her ankles and pulled. The tug sent her sliding away from the wall and onto the floor, her head hitting the concrete with a thud. With blurred vision and ringing ears, Ava could feel David straddle her hips, his butt resting on her knees.

When his fingers went for the button of her jeans, Ava let out a scream and began hitting him with her bind hands. She contacted his face once. It _only_ happened once due to David grabbing the binds and pinning her wrists above her head. Ava squirmed, hating how weak she was as she watched him use his free hand to begin unbuckling his belt.  

“Yeah, keep fighting.” He growled, “More fun for me.”

And Ava did keep fighting. Even when she felt the cold air of the cell hit her bare thighs, she thrashed her body from side to side, trying to get him off her. If this was going to happen she was going to make it as difficult as possible for him. Ava kept fighting until David was pulled off her.

“I’m…sorry, sir.”

David’s stuttering made Ava lift her head. From her vantage point, she could see her attacker on the hallway floor, practically curling into himself as she looked up at the looming figure of Negan. Ava could only see his back, but from the tension carried in his shoulders, she could tell the leader was far from happy.

“Why are you apologizing to me?” Negan crouched to David’s level before pointing Lucille in Ava’s direction, “It’s her that you should be groveling to.”

 David took the hint, his eyes settling on Ava, “I’m sorry.”

Ava only glared. The last thing he deserved was forgiveness. Negan let out a breath as he stood back to his full height.

“Well, now that that’s settled…”

Without warning, Negan brought Lucille down onto David’s skull. The man’s screams were silenced instantly, but that didn’t stop the leader as he continued to bring the bat down repeatedly. Ava noticed that Negan’s face was vacant of joy—he was angry and unleashing his wrath on David. If she suspected that he was in on the attack, Ava was currently proving to be incorrect.

The scene was gruesome, and Ava wanted to close her eyes, but she couldn’t bring herself to look away. In the back of her mind, she knew she needed to see this. Not just for herself, but for the other women he had no doubt attempted to disrespect. She wondered if Negan thought the same as he finally heeded his attack, the leader taking a moment to observe his work before finally turning to Ava.

Even though he had just saved her, Ava felt her blood run cold as Negan walked into her cell and couched down next to her body. His eyes were cold when he brandished a knife, and Ava mentally prepared herself for another fight. She could take him—maybe.

Her planning appeared moot as Negan used the knife to cut off her ropes.

“Sorry you had to see that.” He began as he cut the ties, “Sorry about the rope, too. But you _did_ try to kill me.”

He let out a low chuckle, the sound making Ava raise a brow in confusion. Negan was ready to kill her in Alexandria for wielding a gun, and here he was laughing about the incident as if it was a joke among friends. Standing to his full height, Negan gestured down to her exposed thighs.

“Make yourself decent.”

He turned towards the hallway. The permission of privacy was unexpected, but Ava counted her blessings as she stood up with shaking legs, pulling her jeans along. She leaned against the wall, clearing her throat. Negan took that as a sign as he turned around—the anger on his face now replaced by a familiar expression of cockiness. 

“I didn’t come down here to correct the behavior of some asshole.” He picked up Lucille, pointing the weapon at Ava. “I have some questions, sweetheart.”

Ava rubbed her wrists, not making eye contact. She thought about going silent, but she knew that wouldn’t stop a talker like Negan. She looked up at him, raising her eyebrows impatiently as Negan licked his bottom lip.

“You know what? I’ll be right back.”

Ava waited until she heard the click of the lock before sliding down to the concrete floor. It was a few moments later when she threw up in the corner of the cell.

* * *

 

The creak of the door and the light from the hall was enough to wake Ava up from her slumber. She lifted her head from her hands, taking in the sight of a mustached man.

“Rise and shine!” He clapped as he wandered into the room, “You got places to go, people to see.”

He extended a hand down to Ava, waiting for her to take it. Hesitantly, Ava accepted the hand and she was soon pulled to her feet. 

"Name's Simon, I'll be your escort for the day."

She blinked, "Why?"

"Because, little lady," Simon grinned. "You have a date with the man tonight." 

 


	34. Everyone's Alright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl and Enid get ready to fight while Ava prepares for a battle of her own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooo, it's been a minute! 
> 
> Seriously, I'm so sorry for the lack of updates. I was battling mono and literally had NO ENERGY. And, when I did get some energy back, it had to all be used for work--eh, adulting. 
> 
> But I'm back, and I hope you can forgive me enough to enjoy this chapter :).

Daryl was pissed.

Not about ‘King’ Ezekiel’s refusal to fight the Saviors--he expected to be disappointed the moment the man invited them to stay overnight to give him time to ‘think’. No, Daryl was ticked because it has been two days and they were still no closer to getting Ava back. A part of him blamed himself. If he had only waited a few hours, they could have gotten out together.  

Ava would fight with them, hell, she probably would have been able to convince Ezekiel to join the cause. She could make any man do anything with those eyes, and Daryl couldn’t help but smile to himself as he thought of the deep brown orbs.

God. He hated this.

Daryl aimed his frustrations at the Kingdom’s gatekeepers, “We’re gone!”

The gates creaked open, and Daryl was about to follow his group out when Rick gently grabbed his bicep. Daryl didn’t need him to speak to know what he was thinking.

“I’m not stayin’ here.”

“It’s the smartest play, you know it is.” Rick’s gentle voice reasoned.

Daryl hated that the leader was right. The Saviors were probably on their way back to Alexandria right now to look for him. He had worked so hard to get back to his home only to be banished from it.

“If Ava’s with them, you have to try to get her back.”

Rick’s eyes softened, recalling how he groveled to Negan to let Daryl stay after his first visit. If the Saviors did bring Ava along, Rick couldn’t repeat his request. They needed to keep up the airs of submission while they prepared for war.

“For Enid,” Daryl added when Rick opened his mouth to oppose the request. “At least try for her.”

Rick raised a brow in amusement, “Just for her?”

The hunter scoffed. Rick—well, more like the entirety of Alexandria—suspected that Daryl and Ava had something more than a friendship. Sure, they kissed, but they weren’t together. After dealing with Dwight, he had planned to come home and ask Ava on a proper date. Then, Negan happened.

Daryl missed Ava, that much was clear, but he couldn’t deny the love between sisters. Especially sisters that have been inseparable for years. Daryl thought about how terrified he was when Merle wasn’t on the rooftop in Atlanta. If he felt that way about his insane brother, Daryl couldn’t imagine the pain Enid was in. He wanted nothing more than for the teen to get her happiness back. Even more so than he wanted his own.

“She needs her older sister, man.”

“I’ll…see what I can do.” Rick hesitated, but Daryl figured it was better than nothing. “We’ll be back soon.”

Daryl watched him walk away until the gates closed off his view and cut him off from his family for good. 

* * *

 

It felt like they had been walking for hours.

Or, more accurately, that Simon had been walking while Ava stumbled next to him.

She considered fighting him off and booking it down a hallway, but her logic got the better of her. She wouldn’t know where to go for a quick escape. The building was nothing more than a maze of hallways and splotches of grey to her.

The only true landmark she remembered was the fence of walkers right outside—a perfect way to keep people in.  

Eventually, they stopped in front of a pair of double doors and Simon shot Ava a knowing smile before pushing them open with a flourish. Ava tripped over herself as he pushed her inside the room. Her jaw clenched as she resisted the urge to turn around and push him right back; fighting would only make things worse for her…and Daryl.

To clear her mind of her locked-up friend, Ava took in her surroundings. The room was intricately designed, and it reminded Ava of the days before the end. However, it wasn’t the fully stocked bar or lavish chandelier that took her breath away—it was the group of beautiful women clad in black dresses and stilettos, staring at her with wide eyes.

“Alright ladies, your dear husband has a job for you.” Simon addressed the group, gesturing to Ava with disinterest, “Make her decent then send her his way. Chop-chop.”

The closing of the doors echoed throughout the room. Ava never cared much about her looks, but she became painfully aware of her sweaty form and dirt-stained skin as most of the women turned their back on her. It was like high school all over again.

“Don’t worry about them.” A red-head approached Ava with a kind smile, “They’re just over being a part of Negan’s games.”

Ava narrowed her eyes, “And you’re not?”

“Of course, he’s exhausting.” She breathed before offering a small smile, “I’m Frankie, by the way.”

Ava got a little comfort from seeing that not everyone in Negan’s community was drinking the Kool-Aid, but she needed to keep her guard up. Being annoyed by a man’s antics wasn’t the same as getting ready for a revolt.

She nodded at Frankie before introducing herself. 

“Ava.”

“I figured.” Frankie admitted, “Eugene told us about you, how you guys ended up here. That was brave.”

Ava stopped listening the moment Frankie mentioned Eugene. After they got separated, Ava didn’t spend much time wondering what happened to him. She assumed he got thrown in a cell as well and that the music drowned out the sound of his sobs. With all the scenarios swimming through her mind, Ava could only think of one question to ask. 

“Is he okay?”

“I think so.” Frankie answered with a sheepish smile, “Negan wants us to hang out with him tonight.”

Ava frowned. Getting to spend time with beautiful women sounded like a reward; maybe not in Eugene’s mind, but certainly for a man like Negan. As if sensing her confusion, Frankie placed a gentle hand on Ava’s shoulder before nodding towards a closed door; a silent promise of a longer conversation. 

“He doesn’t like it when we’re late.”

* * *

 

_Ava couldn’t help but let out a sigh of satisfaction when she stepped into the hot water of Frankie’s shower. If she started to enjoy the warmth too much, Ava reminded herself that she wasn’t doing this for Negan. This was for her own cleanliness after being stuck in a shit-stained prison; her own desire to wash off David’s stench._

_However, after talking to Frankie, Ava shouldn’t feel guilty for anything. While she was locked away, Eugene was given the title of ‘Lead Engineer,’ a job that he seemed to be enjoying. Ava silently prayed it was all an act. She didn’t know him too well, but Ava saw enough of Eugene to understand that he was a man who let fear control him. Ava figured she would have to talk to him herself before jumping to any sort of conclusion._

_Ava hoped that she would have a chance to see him again after going into the lion’s den._

As the sun disappeared behind the horizon, the Hilltop community grew silent. The only prominent sounds were the crickets and the scraping of Enid’s knife as she lazily rubbed it against the wood that made up the walls. Noticing that the guards didn’t have proper shift changes, she offered to take over so that the guys could eat.

She tried to tell herself that it was out of the goodness of her heart. When Enid couldn’t convince herself of that, she decided it was because she knew Maggie would’ve done it if she noticed. Despite her love for Maggie, Enid was still lying. This wasn’t for Hilltop or Maggie, this was for herself.

“Thought you’d be hungry.”

Enid was so engrossed with her own thoughts that she didn’t hear Maggie climbing up to the tower. A kind smile dawned her lips as she held out a sandwich wrapped in a paper towel. Enid glanced at the food before turning back to the outside world.

“I’m not.”

Maggie frowned, but didn’t take the dismissal to heart. She was used to teens pretending to be hard when all they wanted to do was break—Beth shared the same habit. 

“Not eating isn’t going to bring her back quicker.” Maggie’s voice was low and warm, “Neither is staying up here all night without sleep.”

Enid knew Maggie had a point. The only thing that could bring Ava back was fighting—and she needed her strength for that. However, that didn’t change the fact that she didn’t have an appetite. Enid had only been able to drink water ever since Rick and the group walked through the gates. Since she found out Ava was gone.

“I can’t.”

She didn’t mean for her voice to shake, but Maggie caught it. The woman didn’t speak, only setting the food down before wrapping an arm around her. It was all the contact needed for Enid to breakdown, to finally let out all the sadness she had been hording for the last two days.

“Let me tell you what we’re going to do.” Maggie’s tone was gentle, “We’re going to cry tonight and get back to work tomorrow. Deal?”

Right now, Enid didn’t know if she would ever be able to stop crying. Then she thought about the woman comforting her. Maggie lost everything, and yet she was ready to prepare for a war. Enid still had a chance of seeing Ava again—she could be strong. She could be ready to fight.

“Deal.”

* * *

 

_Spending the evening with Negan’s wives reminded Ava of the sleepovers she used to have with her friends. After her shower, Frankie, and another woman—Tanya, Ava reminded herself of the woman’s name—were waiting to dry her hair, curl it, and do her makeup. It would’ve been fun if she was getting ‘dolled up’ for someone else._

_Instead of focusing on the negative, Ava decided to use the time to find out more about the workings of the ‘Sanctuary.’ She was able to decipher the points system and the ‘perks’ of being a wife before being fitted into a dress and heels and marched down the dark hallway._

_“He’ll be here soon,” Frankie smiled kindly. “Take a breath.”_

_“Thank you,"  Ava meant it genuinely._

_Frankie only gave one last nod before closing the door, leaving Ava alone in the spacious bedroom.  Ava surveyed the area. Like the wives’ lounge, it had a touch of elegance Ava thought was long gone after the end of the world. Each item only proved to Ava that he had a big ego._

_She had only laid eyes on a table set for two for a split second when the sound of a doorknob twisting made her turn towards the entrance._

“Oh, shit!” Negan stood in the doorway, excitement radiating off of him. “Look at you!”

Ava didn’t say a word, silently watching as Negan closed the door before setting Lucille against the wall. Once he appeared to be relatively settled, he stood back and drank her in. The ogling made Ava cringe, and she looked down to pull at her dress, hoping to get the hemline to cover more of her thighs.

Frankie picked out a strapless black cocktail dress from her closet for Ava to borrow, along with a pair of black pumps that were already giving her blisters. The pain in her feet was nothing compared to the discomfort she felt as Negan circled her—a predator licking his chops.

“You look good enough to eat,” He stopped in front of her, once again taking in her form. “And I’m fucking starving!”

He leaned forward, and Ava flinched backwards only to have Negan walk around her to get to the table. She crossed her arms over her chest; he hadn’t even laid a finger on her and yet Ava felt violated.

“Well?” He asked, gesturing to the meal in front of him with a huge smile. “The cells don’t have five-star dining. I _know_ you’re hungry.”

Ava eyed the food on the table; steak, green beans, and mashed potatoes. It made her sick that she watched Rick skip meals in favor of his kids to eat while the Saviors were feasting every night. However, Negan was right. She hadn’t eaten in two days and she was sure her mouth was watering. He poured two glasses of wine, glancing up at Ava for a moment. Was her hunger that obvious?

“What’cha waiting for, sweetheart?”

Maybe Ava was waiting for a reason to not feel guilty about eyeing this food. Maybe she was waiting for Negan to spontaneously combust--an easy solution to the colossal problems he created.

“Why?”

Ava concluded that it was all she wanted to know. Why did Negan want her to eat with him?  What would he gain from sharing a meal? She may not get an honest answer, but she had to try. At least for her own conscience. Negan placed the bottle back on the table, leaning back in his chair as he ran a hand over his clean shaven face.

 “I need you to know that what that sack of shit did down there does not fly at the Sanctuary,” His once gleeful expression melted into hardness. “We’re not monsters. And I’m truly sorry that Rapey Davey laid a finger on you.”

“So, that’s what this is?” Ava nodded towards the table, “A peace offering?”

“An apology _mixed_ with a peace offering.”

“I tried to kill you.”

Ava couldn’t understand why Negan wanted her forgiveness—or why he would think she would accept a ‘peace offering’—when the reason she was here was for an assassination attempt. The corner of his mouth quirked up.

“I’m still here aren’t I?” He gestured to his own body, “No harm, no foul. Besides, I told you that that’s the kind of badassery I love to see in people.”   

Ava remembered when Negan told her that—it was right before he threw her in a cell with the goal to break her. Her mind went to Daryl and how Negan ‘loved’ the attitude he saw in him. She wondered if Daryl was a woman if he would be getting offered this treatment. He pointed to the empty chair.

“Sit.”

His tone was light, but Ava didn’t miss the command laced within the word. He was growing impatient. She didn’t understand why it was important to him, and she would probably only find out by accepting his invitation. However, Ava couldn’t bring herself to eat when Alexandria was going hungry—when Daryl was downstairs, starving.

“It’s…not fair.”

A slow smile came over his features, amused by her allegiance to her community, “I won’t tell.”

Ava pursed her lips. Not partaking in one meal wouldn’t put food on the table for the Alexandrians—for Enid. Besides, Ava would need her strength if she wanted to get out of here, and food was the way to get it back. Hesitantly, Ava walked over to the table and took a seat, earning a chuckle from Negan. She put a finger up.

“This doesn’t mean anything.”

“Whatever you say.”

Negan began cutting into his own food, the man shoveling down the contents. Ava was the exact opposite. She picked up her fork, but she couldn’t bring herself to stab the already chopped pieces. Noticing her pause, Negan lowered his own fork, annoyance dancing in his eyes.

“What’s the problem _now_?”  

It wasn’t a problem that was making Ava pause, it was an idea. An idea that she was sure would get shot down, but it was worth a try while Negan was in a giving mood.

“If I eat half of this, can Daryl have the rest?”

She couldn’t feed Alexandria, but she could help Daryl. Ava knew Negan wouldn’t accept her giving her whole meal to the man, and she hoped her anticipation of his character would pay off. However, upon seeing the frown forming on Negan’s face, Ava prepared herself for rejection. 

“Sweetheart, Daryl isn’t here.” He broke the news with a sympathetic tone, “He vamoosed a few hours before we got back. Took off with my favorite wife—well, _one_ of my favorites.”

Ava deflated. She was glad to hear that Daryl was free, but he was the only one she had left. The only one she could count on—especially if Frankie was right about Eugene. The realization that she was going to be trapped here much longer than anticipated made Ava pick up her wine glass.

She hadn’t realized she had drank all of the contents until the sound of Negan refilling her glass reached her ears.

“I have plans for the asshat who opened the door for them.”

He said it as if Ava would be thrilled to hear that someone would be punished for freeing her friend. He narrowed his eyes.

“Don’t suppose you know where he took off to.”

Ava scoffed, “If I did I wouldn’t tell you.”

“Even if it meant catching him with his pants around his ankles?”

It took Ava a moment to register what Negan was implying, but once she did, she had to swallow her laughter. Negan didn’t know a thing about Daryl. He wasn’t the type of guy to just hook up with anyone. Even if that person was someone who saved his life. But Ava wasn’t about to reveal more about Daryl than Negan needed to know.

“It doesn’t matter what I think because I don’t know where he is.”

“You know, Sherry always had a soft spot for him. Begged me to go easy on him.” He spoke between bites, ignoring Ava’s words, “It’s going to be so much worse when I get ‘im back.”

A shiver ran down Ava’s spine. Finding Daryl wouldn’t be easy; he wasn’t foolish enough to go back to Alexandria. However, if anyone could find him, it would be Negan and the leader wouldn’t let him out of his sight.  Wherever Daryl was, there was not a doubt in Ava’s mind that he was getting ready to fight. He needed to be out there, and Ava could take care of herself in here.

She just hated that ‘taking care of herself’ in the Sanctuary meant playing right into Negan’s hand.  

“You don’t need him—at least, not anymore.” Ava noticed Negan’s expression of interest, “You have me to take his place as prisoner.”

That was the point of this, wasn’t it? To not only punish Ava for her attempt at assassination, but to also discourage an uprising. By taking Ava—and Daryl—Negan showed Rick that he wasn’t afraid to not only kill his friends for stepping out of line, but to also make them pay on his terms.

“You are an effective piece of collateral, I’ll give you that. Rick looked like he was about to sob when I took you and the Bullet maker away.” Ava resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the glee in Negan’s voice as he continued, “But your time in the box is done. I haven’t decided what to do with you just yet.”

His voice was low, and he leaned back in his chair to survey Ava’s form as if he was deciding her fate. No matter what he decided, she would always be a prisoner. He tapped a finger against the table.

“Like I said, you’re a badass, but I can’t trust you with my guns or men.” He let out a disgusted scoff, “Too much of a risk—for them and you. I could give you a grunt job, but even that is pushing it…”

Ava bit the inside of her cheek. She knew where this was going, and the destination had everything to do with the black dress that she was dawning. Negan was stalling, the curl of his lip as he rambled reminded Ava how much he enjoyed his own theatrics.

“How about we skip to what you really want.”

“Eager, I like it.” Negan chuckled, his smile growing wider. “You can marry me.”

Even though Ava was expecting the proposition ever since she was pushed into the wives’ quarters, hearing it spoken aloud was a whole different ballgame. Her head was spinning, and her dizziness only got worse as Negan dug deeper into the option.

“Now, I know we won’t be knocking boots, but a marriage isn’t all about sex.” He chuckled, “You’ll get a bed, a hot shower….some new friends.”

She blinked in confusion. Confusion over the fact that Negan was listing the ways their ‘union’ would benefit her, and not focusing on himself.

“What do you get out of it?” Ava crossed her arms, shrugging, “Like you said, we’ll never have sex.”

“I don’t know what kind of boys you’ve been with but a man desires more than sex,” Negan feigned an expression of hurt. “All I want is your company, sweetheart.”

“And a way to keep a close eye on me.”

“Bingo.”

Ava nodded knowingly. It was a smart play—what do you do with someone you can’t trust? You keep them in your line of sight, or in this case, right down the hall.

“We’ll have meals together, entertain each other. Maybe I’ll break out the Monopoly.” He smirked, “Who knows? Maybe the more you keep me happy, the more I’ll ease up on Alexandria.”

There it was—the way Negan was planning to coerce her into accepting his proposal. Ava thought of the bare shelves back in the Inventory, the dwindling medical supplies. She thought of Olivia’s corpse on the Grimes' porch, Rosita’s sobs as she was dragged away, Rick standing in the middle of the street, utterly broken.

Ava thought of Enid and Daryl.

“Well?” The familiar voice rumbled with anticipation.

Ava picked up her full glass of wine and downed it in one gulp.

* * *

 

_“Did anyone get hurt?” Carol needed to know, “Did the Saviors…”_

_A lump grew in Daryl’s throat as he watched Carol cover her mouth, tears threatening to spill over. She couldn’t fathom the loss he had seen firsthand, and for that he was grateful. Carol wasn’t the monster she labeled herself. Yes, she was tough and more than capable to handle herself, but her heart was still as big as it was the day Daryl decided to let her in._

_“Is everyone back home okay?” She asked after collecting herself, "Daryl?"_

_Daryl stared at her tear streaked face. Who was he to shatter that beautiful heart? To make his friend, who wanted nothing more than to live in peace, fight?_

_“We made a deal with them, like Ezekiel.” Daryl lied, “Everyone’s alright.”_

_A sob of relief left Carol’s mouth, and Daryl watched as she wiped away her tears. He swallowed the lump in his throat. He repeated the words in a whisper, as if for himself._

_“Everyone’s alright.”_

The Savior didn’t spare Ava a glance as he escorted her back to the wives’ den. He didn’t offer a hand when she almost tripped in her heels or utter a ‘goodnight’ when he closed the door behind her. Ava let out the breath she didn't know she was holding.

The once full living space was now empty, devoid of life. It would’ve fit perfectly with the isolation Ava was feeling if it wasn’t for the dim light of a lamp in the corner.

Her tired eyes landed on Frankie, the redhead illuminated by the light as she put her book down. The seasoned wife stared at Ava, taking in her appearance; her face flushed from the wine, eyes half-lidded and curls now frizzed over. Frankie didn’t flinch when Ava took off her heels and threw them across the room, both hitting the bookcase with a thunk. Frankie had seen that kind of frustration before. 

“You did what you had to do.”

Ava noticed that Frankie’s tone wasn’t one of comfort. It was a hard fact. Ava did what she had to do, but it wasn’t for herself. It was for her family. A better chance for them to truly live.

And that’s why Ava had to say yes.


	35. Loyalty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava learns the way of the Saviors while Enid and Daryl learn a bit more about each other.

_Despite the sleep in her eyes, Enid kept her focus on Maggie as she talked the Hilltop residents through the proper way to throw a knife. It was hard not to be enthralled by the lesson and Enid felt a surge of pride watching Maggie slide easily into the role of leader._

_She reminded Enid of Ava, and how her older sister had no other choice than to take the physical, and emotional, lead after their parents died. At the time, Enid didn’t think of the toll it must’ve taken on her. She didn’t appreciate her enough, and Enid wondered if she would ever get the chance to truly thank her face-to-face._

_Maggie’s voice broke Enid out of her spiral, “Want to give it a try?”_

_Hungry for a distraction, Enid took her spot next to Maggie. Unsheathing her knife from its’ holster, she copied the stance taught to her before throwing the blade towards the upturned tree stump. Much to her surprise, the knife embedded itself into the center of the target. A slow smile crept onto her face, and Maggie patted her back with pride._

_“I wish Ava was here,” Enid turned to Maggie, humor dancing in her eyes. “She’s not going to believe that I got it on the first try.”_

_Maggie let out a small laugh, “Well, you have a lot of witnesses.”_

_The residents buzzed with impressed murmurs, and Enid grinned as they all clamored to be next to try. Enid was a bit surprised when one man came up to her, asking for tips. However, before she could offer any help, an announcement by the guard sent her running towards the gate._

_“Daryl’s back!”_

The ceiling fan rotated lazily, Ava watching the blades with disinterest as she sank down on the grey bedspread. She didn’t sleep the night before—how could she when the evening was already a nightmare? After her outburst in the den, Ava grabbed a bottle of wine from the bar and allowed Frankie to point her in the direction of her new room. She was grateful that the redhead didn’t follow her in. Ava didn’t want to talk about her bad decision, she wanted to drink it away.

Despite hearing the wives rise and the delivery of breakfast, Ava still didn’t leave the confines of her room. She wasn’t ready to face the stares or to get asked questions she didn’t have answers to. However, Ava was pleasantly surprised when Tanya brought her a bowl of oatmeal.

_“You’ll need it.” She had said as she placed it on the bedside table, “There’s a meeting later today.”_

_“About what?” Ava asked, her voice rough with exhaustion._

_Tanya shrugged, “Nothing good, probably.”_

Ava’s heart dropped, remembering what Negan had said the night before. Was this meeting part of the ‘plans’ he had for the person who freed Daryl and his wife? Was Daryl humiliated in front of the Sanctuary for his transgressions? Ava closed her eyes, trying to remember the man with a soft smile on his face, but all she could think of was him in pain.

She took a few deep breaths. Daryl was free, he was safe. Ava could see him now; a new crossbow in his hands, crouching in the grass. Ava saw him with Enid at his side; he was teaching her how to track and she listened with more interest than she had ever shown Ava. The thought made Ava smile, but the warm feeling left when a heavy knock on the door made her eyes ping open.

“Rise and shine, sweetheart!” The unmistakable voice of Negan boomed through the door, “Time to crack some eggs!”

Ava rolled her eyes. Through her morning of moping, Ava forgot that Tanya told her that Negan wanted to ‘escort her’ down to her first Savior meeting. Apparently, he wasn’t thrilled about Ava’s decision to hole up in her room for the morning.

Climbing out of bed, Ava slipped on a pair of heels before opening the door to be greeted by a beaming Negan.  Ava wondered if his cheeks ever got sore from smiling so much.

“You look just as beautiful as the day I met you.”

Ava’s jaw clenched. The day she met Negan was the day she lost her two friends, the day she lost Daryl. She heard the underline mocking in his tone, a confirmation that he was trying to get under her skin. Trying to get her to say the wrong thing that would put Alexandria in jeopardy. Ava wouldn’t let him.

“You’ve looked better.” 

The smile never wavered from Negan’s face as he breathed out a short chuckle. It was then Ava truly understood what he wanted from her; he may enjoy breaking people, but he also loved a challenge. Negan said it himself, he loved a badass.

“Yeah, well, I did even get a kiss goodnight last night.”  He nodded to the exit, “Come on, I got people waiting.”

Before Ava could comment, Negan grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the room. His grip was tight, as if worried that Ava would try something while they were alone in the hallways of the Factory. She would be lying if she said she didn’t think about it, but Ava was in heels and Negan was the man holding the barb-wired baseball bat. The pair stopped in front of a pair of metal doors, and Negan looked down at her with a smirk.

“Check this out.”

Ava flinched when Negan kicked the door open, knocking the metal against the brick of the building before going inside, pulling her along with him. The sound acted as a calling card, and Ava couldn’t help but turn her nose up in disgust as the Saviors dropped to their knees. The weight of their gaze was heavy on Ava, and it made her realize why Negan wanted to take her to the meeting himself.

He wanted everyone to see the girl from Alexandria—the girl who tried to _kill_ him—under his thumb. Ava was an example, a lesson on what will happen if you try to go against the big man. Ava swallowed her anger when she felt his hand move to her lower back, gently pushing her towards the wives.

When everyone rose to their feet, Ava caught sight of Eugene on the balcony above. If he was disappointed over her new status, she couldn’t tell through his shaking. All Ava could make out was his terrified expression as he looked between herself and Negan. The leader followed her gaze and pointed Lucille up at him.

“You are gonna want to pay close attention to this.”

Ava didn’t have time to register what Negan said before he swung Lucille with a flourish, the barbwire connecting with the side of the Sanctuary’s doctor. Her eyes widened as the man fell to his knees, withering in pain as two Saviors picked him up to keep him on his feet. Negan seemed unmoved as he pulled out a ripped piece of paper from his jacket pocket.

“I found this little souvenir tucked away in your desk, Carson.” 

Carson shook his head vigorously, “I…I don’t know what that is!”

Negan let out an annoyed sigh as he jammed the tip of his bat into the Doctor’s stomach. The grunt of pain went right through Ava, a chill running down her spine.

“ _You_ left the door opened and let my puppy out,” Negan began as he pulled on a large black glove. “You knew Sherry hated Daryl being here, so you let him out for her, be the hero. Then you could move right in!”

“But I didn’t,” He tried to reason, his voice still twisted with pain. “She’s the one who ran.”

“Oh, she ran? You know why she ran?!” Negan’s voice boomed, and Ava was sure she was the only one who didn’t jump. “Because she knew I would blame her, which…I did. But see, Sherry told Dwighty boy the whole story…”

Ava glanced over to Dwight, his eyes focus on the fire dancing in the furnace. From what Daryl had told her, and what she had seen firsthand, Ava wouldn’t believe a word out of his mouth. Her anger rose higher as Dwight’s silence grew. He was guilty and was about to let an innocent man take his punishment.

She waited for Dwight to prove her wrong—to prove himself—but it never came as he took an iron out of the fire and handed it over to Negan. Carson began to beg for his life, and Ava had to swallow the bile that threatened to raise from her throat. She knew Negan led with fear, but she had no idea just how much.

“Now you know I hate this shit.” Negan chided as he did his best to hold the Doctor still, “Just tell me you did it and that you’re sorry and I don’t have to do this.”

Ava checked on Eugene to see a Savior holding his head, making sure he didn’t miss the burning. She wanted nothing more than to push the woman off him. Not to coddle Eugene, but to make sure Negan’s fear tactic didn’t work.

“Yes. Yes, I did it.” Carson sobbed, “All of it. I’m so sorry.”

Much to Ava’s surprise, Negan backed away from the man. He dropped the iron on the ground, the clatter echoing throughout the room.

“That’s all you had to say!” He grinned, “That is all you had to say.”

He placed a hand on Carson’s shoulder, the Doctor looking more than a little relieved to be out of the woods with the leader. However, something didn’t feel right to Ava. She didn’t know if it was the deafening silence, or the way Negan’s eyes danced between her and Eugene, but she knew he wasn’t done.

Her suspicions were confirmed when Negan grabbed Carson by his two shoulders and ran him over to furnace, pushing him into the fire. Ava’s eyes widened, her jaw unhinged as Carson wailed. A yelp came from her right, and Ava turned to see Frankie holding one of the younger wives in her arms, the young girl weeping. Ava looked up at Eugene, his hands covering his face as he shook.

For once, Ava felt the way Eugene looked.

“A good thing we got a spare Dr. Carson!” Negan chuckled as he patted Dwight’s back.

Ava didn’t know if it was the smell of burning flesh in the air or if it was the wink Negan sent her way that made her place her hands on her knees and vomit on the concrete floor.

* * *

 

_“Feeling any better?”_

_Ava removed the cold wash cloth—courtesy of Amber—from her eyes to see Frankie and Tanya standing in the doorway of her bedroom. Honestly, she felt better the moment she vomited. It was as if the bile was holding all the disgust she felt for the Saviors. It was nice to let it go—and to disgust Negan. Luckily, her sickness made him want to get distance from her for the evening._

_“Yeah, I am.” Ava did her best to smile as she sat up in the bed, “I’m sorry I didn’t warn you guys to get out of the splash zone. It happened so fast.”_

_Frankie gave a sympathetic smile while Tanya waved her off before saying, “You’re fine. It was a lot, even for him.”_

_Ava pursed her lips. She had to remind herself that they didn’t see their husband gut Spencer like a fish._

_“Is there something else?” Ava asked when the wives didn’t leave._

_Ava watched as the two shared a look, Tanya even shifting from one foot to the other. There was obviously something they needed, and Ava wondered why they thought she could give it to them._

_“It’s about Eugene.” Frankie was the first to speak, “We asked him to make…suicide pills for Amber, but we’re really going to use them on Negan.”_

_Ava’s eyes went wide, and she couldn’t stop the sadistic smile that crossed her features. Now she knew she wasn’t alone—now she knew that Alexandria wasn’t alone. They had the best possible ‘in.’ Hell, they could end it tonight._

_“Okay, so, what’s the problem?” Ava lightly asked as she got out of bed, adrenaline running through her._

_Tanya’s fist clenched, trying to control her anger as she thought of the only person truly standing in their way._

_"It's him."_

Daryl wouldn’t look at Maggie.

Enid first noticed this when Maggie and Jesus were dealing with Gregory. The ‘leader’ of Hilltop was concerned over Daryl’s presence at the community—more like he was concerned for his own well-being if the ex-prisoner was found in their midst. Luckily, Maggie shut down his unease by making sure the gatekeepers would announce the Saviors’ arrival the moment their armored trucks came into view.

Daryl mumbled a ‘thanks’, his eyes focused on his boots until he left the Barrington House. Maggie turned to Enid, silently asking if the interaction was as weird as she thought. Enid merely shrugged. Daryl always was the silent type, but never around those he was close to.

The isolation only escalated in the evening. As Enid served Sasha and Jesus their dinner, she watched as Maggie brought out a plate to Daryl. The man didn’t move as Maggie placed a hand on his shoulder before heading back towards their trailer.

“Not a word, huh.” Jesus’ question came out as a statement.

Maggie sighed, taking her seat next to Sasha. “I don’t know how long he expects to keep this up. He’s probably going to be here for a long time.”

“He’ll come around.” Sasha reassured, “Give him time.”

Enid was only half-listening, her eyes still on Daryl as she came to a decision. With her plate in one hand and a water in the other, she made her way towards the open door.

“Oh no, are we that boring?” Jesus joked, pausing in the ‘shop-talk.’

Enid grinned, “I’m just going to give him some company.”

“He’ll like that.” Maggie smiled.

Enid smiled back before taking a breath and heading outside. The night air was warm, the chirping of crickets only adding to the feeling of summer comfort that Hilltop seemed to radiate. Daryl was perched on the stairs leading up to the trailer he was sharing with Jesus, the man balancing the plate of meat on his knees as he took large bites. She didn’t miss the way Daryl tensed when she stepped up towards him, immediately relaxing when he saw it was only her. She held out the bottle of water.

“Figured you’d get thirsty.”

Daryl looked up at her, accepting the water. “Thanks.”

She didn’t miss how he made eye contact with her. A confirmation that his aversion was only to Maggie. Enid raised her leg, bumping her foot to the side of Daryl’s leg.

“Scoot.”

Daryl huffed, but Enid caught the ghost of a smile on his face as he made room for the girl. Enid let out a relieved sigh as she took her seat, digging into her own food.

“Why are ya out here?” Daryl asked, his tone curious.

Enid fired back, “Why are you?”  

He whipped his head to face her, and Enid couldn’t help but feel successful for catching Daryl off guard. She wasn’t expecting to have a ‘heart-to-heart’ with the man, but Enid knew firsthand how dangerous it could be to leave everything bottled up. Maybe she could peek through the cracks. Daryl shifted in his seat.

“She doesn’t need me around.” His voice was low, “Doesn’t need the reminder.”

Enid frowned. She had a feeling his distance from Maggie had everything to do with Glenn’s death. She hated that she was right—hated that Daryl blamed himself for a death none of them could stop. Although Enid wanted to tell him that it wasn’t his fault, she knew it would fall on deaf ears. Instead, she focused on Maggie.

“Maybe you’re right.” Enid spoke, “But she does need you. Maggie’s a part of your family, and if Ava were here…she would be pissed at you.”

Enid could see Ava reading Daryl the riot act to go talk to Maggie, and she was sure Daryl would fight back. They wouldn’t stay mad for long, Ava was never one for lasting anger among people she loved. Daryl looked down at Enid, his eyes softening when he took in her far away expression.

“Ava would drag me into that trailer if she was here.”

Daryl felt his chest warm as his attempt at lightening the mood succeeded, the corner of Enid’s lips rising for a moment. However, it didn’t last as Enid looked down at her plate, picking at the styrofoam. Ava could be suffering right now and here they were, taking their freedom for granted. She had no idea what happened behind Negan’s walls, what he did to prisoners.

But she was sitting next to a man who did.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“What…happened to you?” Enid asked, looking up at Daryl. “I mean…what did Negan do to you?”

Daryl blinked. He wasn’t expecting that, but he understood why she wanted to know. Unlike the few residents of Hilltop that came up to him, Enid wasn’t looking for gossip. She wanted to know what Ava may be going through—a reminder of why they were fighting.

“It’s probably not the same as Ava.” Daryl reassured, “I didn’t see many women in the prisoner yard.”

“Maybe it’s not, but it could be.”

Daryl looked down, and Enid knew that he had already thought the same thing. Perhaps he went through his own punishments, wondering if Negan was cruel enough to do the same to Ava. The silence stretched between the pair, and Enid was about to call it when Daryl opened his mouth.

“A guy named Dwight was in charge of me…”

* * *

 

_It was late into the evening when Negan made an appearance in the wives’ lounge. Although Ava put on the air of annoyance from her seat on the couch, she was pleased to see him surveying the lounge. The quicker he picked a wife for the evening; the faster Ava could talk to Eugene. What she didn’t expect was for him to make his way over to her._

_“That was one hell of a display back there,” He chuckled as he sat next to her. “You alright?”_

_Despite his laughter, Ava was surprised to see Negan looking at her with concern. He almost looked handsome. Almost._

_“Getting there.” Ava nodded up at Tanya as she put on a grateful smile, “Tanya was a big help.”_

_Negan followed her gaze, and Ava swallowed a laugh as Tanya went from smiling at her to smirking at her husband. He turned back to Ava._

_“Well, I guess I owe her a thank you.” He patted Ava on the knee before standing up, “Get some rest.”_

_Ava nodded, watching as Negan wrapped an arm around Tanya’s waist, leading her out of the room. The woman looked over her shoulder, sending Ava a wink—a promise that she would keep Negan occupied all night._

Ava knocked softly on the red door, eyeing up and down the dark corridor as she waited for an answer. The halls were vacant, the building silent, but that didn’t ease Ava’s troubled mind. She couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched. Her paranoia got the better of her and Ava banged on the door once more, louder than the first but still muffled enough not to the alert any onlookers. 

A moment later, Eugene opened the door. From his mussed-up hair, Ava could tell she woke him up and she couldn’t help but feel a swell of anger over the fact that he was able to sleep. His tired eyes widened with surprise, but before he could say a word, Ava pushed him into the room as she walked in herself.

“What are you doing out at this hour?” Eugene asked in his usual formal candor, “Does Negan know you’re here? As you know, the man enforces a strict curfew.”

Ava only blinked in response. He didn’t sound frightened over what would happen if Negan caught wind of her presence, instead, Eugene’s words held a warning that he would be the one to report her. She crossed her arms.

“No, I didn’t know that because I spent my first few days here in a cell.” Ava pretended to look over the room, “Nice digs, by the way.”

Eugene’s face fell, and Ava was sure she caught a glimpse of guilt in his eyes. However, her eyes must’ve been playing tricks on her due to the next words that came out of his mouth.

“If you’re intention was to make me feel remorse, you failed.” He raised his chin, “You paid the price for your transgression, and from where I’m standing, I see no difference between our place here.”

Eugene gestured to the black dress she was dawning, a well-known symbol of high status in Negan’s hierarchy. She hoped that Frankie and Tanya were exaggerating when they told her about their own conversation with Eugene, but they clearly weren’t. Eugene was under the Saviors’ spell. Ava wasn’t ready to give up.

“You know that’s not why I’m here.”

He clenched his jaw. Eugene knew exactly why Ava was here, what she wanted from him. Everyone always wanted something from him.

“I’m not changing my mind.”

“After everything he’s done…” Ava trailed off, running a hand through her hair to calm herself down. “You were there when he bashed Abraham’s brains in--.”

“Yes, he killed a few of our…companions.” Eugene cut her off, “But I imagine we killed more of his.”

The back of Ava’s eyes began to burn. The tears weren’t of sadness, they were anger. Angry that Eugene didn’t see the difference between killing to survive and killing to instill fear. Yes, the area was grey, but Ava still felt that they were more in the right.

“Why?”

Her voice was quiet, emotional. If he wasn’t going to help her, Ava felt that she deserved to know the reason.

“Negan values me in a way the Alexandrians never have.” Eugene continued, “Not only has he given me safety, he has given me a purpose.”

There was a lot of things Ava wanted to say. She wanted to yell at Eugene for demoting his family to ‘Alexandrians.’ Ava wanted to slap him for disrespecting Abraham and Glenn. She wanted to remind him of all the times Rick protected him and never asked for anything in return. Ava wanted to scream all of this, but she decided to not waste her breath.

None of it mattered now. Eugene had made his choice and Ava couldn’t sway him.

“You’re a sucker, Eugene.” Ava settled on an insult as she made her way to the door, “A sucker and a coward.”

He didn’t turn around to look at her, “I’m surviving.”

Ava put her hand on the doorknob, ready to leave. However, she needed to make one thing clear before she walked out the door.

“And you’re wrong, there is a difference between us.” Ava began, “I’m doing this for my family, you’re doing it for yourself.”

With that, Ava left the room, closing the door harder than necessary. She let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding as she leaned against the wall. Ava didn’t care if someone spotted her, she needed to collect herself before going back to Frankie. 

Ava was back at square one, but she didn’t pity herself. If anything, Ava felt more for the women back in the lounge. Frankie and Tanya had hope for the first time in years only for Eugene’s selfishness to extinguish the flame.

As she walked back towards her room, Ava made a silent promise to herself that she would get the wives the freedom they desired. They were no longer alone, and Ava would make sure they knew that. __

* * *

_“One condition.” Sasha’s gaze was hard as she looked at Rosita, “I get to take the shot.”_

_“Fine.”_

Daryl was enjoying his morning.

He sat on a stump, the sun warming his skin while Enid made him chuckle with stories of her childhood—stories of Ava. The younger girl talked animatedly as she picked the vegetables in the garden, laughing and smiling as she jumped from tale to tale. For the first time since escaping the Sanctuary, Daryl was smiling too. 

Enid noticed how good it felt to talk about Ava before everything happened—to talk about her older sister without wanting to cry. Daryl provided good company, chiming in every few moments to ask questions. She realized that he needed this time just as much as she did.

Enid hoped Ava would come back soon. Not just for her sake, but for Daryl to create a few memories and stories of his own.

“So, anyway, Ava had the bright idea to hide the wrecked car behind our neighbor’s house--.”

Before she could continue, Enid was interrupted by the sound of chimes at the gate. Her smile fell as the guard confirmed her fears.

“The Saviors are coming!”

Enid quickly got to her feet as chaos broke out around her. The residents were quick to disband their practice sessions and to hide their weapons. All Enid could think about was hiding two people. She turned to Daryl, the man already off the stump and holding his knife. She spoke hurriedly.

“Come on, we got to get Maggie!”

She took off running, knowing Daryl would be close behind. Maggie was already jogging towards them, knowing that they wouldn’t be able to reach the escape route. Enid already knew they wouldn’t be able to get to the edge of Hilltop, her mind already equipped with a backup plan.

“I have an idea, come on.” She gestured for the pair to follow.

They ran to the side of the Barrington House, an underground cellar at their feet. Enid whipped the doors open, moving out of the way for Maggie and Daryl to go downstairs.

“There’s only one way in and out.” She informed them, “Stay down there, I’ll keep them away.”

Maggie nodded as she hustled down the steps. Daryl was about to follow, but he stopped himself, turning to Enid. He thought of what Ava would say to her.

“Don’t fight ‘em.” He warned, “Be smart, alright?”

Enid quickly nodded, “Yeah, got it. Get down there!”

Daryl obliged, and the moment his head was clear, Enid shut the doors. 

She panted, hoping to get her breathing even before a Savior came her way. The easy part was over, now came the challenge of acting like she wasn’t a bundle of nerves. She decided to head back to the garden to finish her task; the Saviors would want the vegetables, and luckily, the cellar could be seen from her spot on the ground.

As she worked, Enid could feel the Saviors walking around her. They paid her no mind, allowing her to continue her work as she loaded the vegetables into a basket. For once, Enid was grateful for the chore. It kept her hands busy and mind occupied.

Luckily, not occupied enough that she didn’t notice a Savior walking towards the cellar. Letting out a curse under her breath, Enid quickly gathered the basket in her arms and hurried towards the man.

“Hi!” Enid called as she slid to a stop, “Uh, I’ve got fresh veggies--.”

“Stop.” The man held up his hand, silencing her. “Vegetables. Use the whole word, we have time.”

Enid blinked. That wasn’t the response she was expecting, but it still made her blood boil. She was sick of all these men looking down at her.

“Okay.” She drawled before thrusting the basket into his arms, “I have these _vegetables_ …you can load them in the truck and then head to the garden where I can get you the rest.”

She hated how small she sounded, so afraid. He seemed unmoved by her words.

“Load ‘em yourself, I’m busy.”

He lazily passed the basket over to Enid, allowing the contents to fall to the ground. Enid quickly dropped to her knees, doing her best to hide her anger has she loaded the veggies back into the basket. The man kneeled to the ground and for a fleeting moment Enid thought he was going to help her.

“I’ll take that.”

Enid followed his point to the knife attached to her belt. Her mom’s knife. It was one of the last mementos she had of her parent, and the thought of this man holding it in his grubby hands made her feel sick.

“Don’t make me cut it off you, girly.”

She pursed her lips, Daryl’s words ringing through her mind—be smart. Words that sounded as if they could come out of Ava’s mouth. Hell, she probably had said to her in the past. Enid then thought of her mom, and how she wouldn’t want her to get punished for a flimsy knife.

Enid swallowed her pride and unhooked the holster from her pants. He didn’t waste anytime snatching the knife away and adding it to his own collection of weapons before walking away. Enid clenched her jaw as she finished cleaning up the mess, willing herself not to throw the basket at him.

Her anger was quickly replaced with dread when she saw him open the cellar door. Enid opened her mouth to distract him but stopped herself. It would only add a level of suspicion that would send him down there faster.

Feeling useless, Enid made her way back to the garden, absentmindedly completing her chores. Her eyes never left the open door.

 


	36. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava seizes an opportunity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of a filler, but ya'll know where this is heading ;)

_“Penny for your thoughts, doll?”_

_Ava looked away from the window and towards Negan. The man was watching her from the couch opposite the one she was reading on. Well, that was until Ava got lost in her thoughts of home—of Enid. For the first time in Ava’s whole life, she didn’t know how her little sister was doing. And that terrified her._

_“I’m just…thinking of Enid.” Negan shot her a confused look and Ava rolled her eyes, “My sister.”_

_Although he was the last person Ava wanted to talk to about her feelings, she didn’t see the harm in talking about Enid. She needed to keep quiet about Enid being in Hilltop. Negan nodded, remembering the young girl he defended from one of his men during his first visit to Alexandria. She was out when he brought back Carl, missing her older sister’s dumb move to kill him. Ava never had a chance to say goodbye—not like he gave her much of chance to say it to anyone else._

_“I could tell Simon to pick her up, bring her here.”_

_Ava blinked, surprised by his care. “Like a visit?”_

_“…A long-term one.”_

_She knew what he meant. Enid could come, but she wouldn’t be able to leave after seeing the Sanctuary. Negan would rather trap her than risk her spilling knowledge to Rick. Ava simply shook her head and went back to her book._

The sun was low in the sky by the time the Saviors departed Hilltop. Enid crossed her arms, an unimpressed look on her face as she watched Doctor Harlan Carson disappear in the distance. The only person who could truly help Maggie was being taken to Negan, and all any of them could do was watch.

She waited until all the trucks disappeared before heading to the cellar. Enid was relieved when the Savior walked out without Daryl and Maggie in tow. She was happy to see him walk out at all—she knew that Daryl was probably itching to take him out the moment he appeared. The less they interfered, the better chance they had to get the jump on Negan.

“All clear!” Enid called down the stairs.

Daryl’s footsteps could be heard coming up the stairs, “About time.”

“Oh, come on.” Maggie teased as she appeared in front of Enid, “It wasn’t too bad.”

“You’re just saying that ‘cause you had more room.”

Enid watched as the two went back and forth, a small smile on her face as she listened to the light tones. Perhaps being trapped down there gave Daryl a chance to air his guilt and for the pair to talk. Enid was sure Daryl still hadn’t forgiven himself, but it sounded as if Maggie forgave him. Knowing Maggie, there was nothing he needed to apologize for.

“How much they take?” Maggie asked, turning to Enid.

She scoffed, “More than half.” Enid frowned, “They took Carson.”

“Negan already has a Doctor,” Daryl trailed off, trying to make sense of the situation.

Enid shrugged, “Or maybe _now_ he does.”

Something happened to the Saviors’ doctor, and considering the solemn expression on Carson’s face, Enid had a feeling it wasn’t an injury his brother could recover from. Maggie ran a hand through her short hair, expression hard as she looked towards the Barrington House. Enid wasn’t shocked that Gregory gave up his people’s health so quickly, and she wasn’t the only one.

“I’ll start asking around, see if anyone has any skills in patching up injuries.” Maggie spoke, thinking of how she was in a Community of inexperienced fighters with a war approaching.

Enid was quick to help, “I can head to Alexandria tomorrow, get a few of those books Ava hid.”

“As long as someone drives you,” Maggie smiled.

Enid hesitantly nodded, knowing that Maggie didn’t want her to be out there on her own, especially with the Saviors appearing more frequently than usual. She turned to Daryl, a sheepish grin on her face.

“Don’t suppose you’re free to take me?”

“I want to,” Daryl was genuine. “But it’s too risky.”

The last thing Enid wanted was to put Daryl in any danger. She patted him on the arm before heading towards one of the busier parts of Hilltop. However, before she could get too far, Daryl gently grabbed her wrist. He looked down at her with concern.

“Did somethin’ happen?”

She blinked, “Yeah, they took Carson.”

“I meant to you.” Daryl explained, “Did that piece of shit hurt you?”

The emptiness on her hip suddenly felt heavy. Losing her knife felt small compared to everything else the Saviors had taken, she felt silly even bringing it up, but it looked as if Daryl wouldn’t let her go until he got an answer. She sighed.

“He took my knife.” Enid sheepishly admitted, “It was one of the last things I had from my mom.”

Daryl’s gaze softened, but Enid didn’t see any pity. It was a relief. Enid was tired of people looking at her as if she was about to break. He nodded, letting her small wrist go.

“I guess we’ll have to get it back then.”

It was the first time Enid felt hope in a long time. She mirrored his nod with a small smile and was about to say her own peace when Maggie came walking back over. Daryl and Enid walked to meet her.

“Find someone?” He asked.

“No, but I’ll worry about that while you guys are gone.” Maggie grinned at Enid and Daryl’s shared confusion before explaining further, “The whole group’s here, and Tara knows where to find more guns.”

* * *

 

_Daryl kept his steps quiet as he made his way to the Barrington House. They were to leave for Oceanside at dawn, everyone already turned in for the evening. They would need their rest if they wanted the plan to work, and Daryl was about to go to sleep himself, when he realized they were still missing two people. Two people Jesus had said to Maggie that they were on a run. Daryl didn’t buy it for a minute._

_He walked through the door, coming face-to-face with an annoyed looking Jesus. However, after seeing Daryl’s hard expression, the annoyance faded._

_“What’s wrong?”_

_Daryl didn’t waste any time, “Where’s Sasha and Rosita?”_

Ava jolted awake to the sound of a fire alarm, her eyes squinting in reaction to one of the flashing lights in her room.  She was quick to get out of bed, pulling her worn boots over her plaid pajama bottoms. If something was going wrong in the Sanctuary, this could be her only chance to slip out without anyone noticing. Without Negan noticing.

She slipped into the main lounge, heading to the bar. Ava figured she would be pushing her luck by trying to find the armory for a weapon. She hoped that she could find a discarded knife somewhere.

“You have to get out of here.”

A hushed whisper made Ava stand to her full height. She was more than a little surprised to see Amber standing in front of the bar, her eyes wide.

“Way ahead of you,” Ava continued to search. “But I need...something.”

She heard Amber leave only for the young girl to come back with a butter knife.

“It’s not much, but it’s all we’re allowed to have.”

Ava grinned, “Thank you.” She took the knife, “Where is everyone?”

“Frankie’s with Negan and the rest are confined to their rooms during emergencies.” Amber blinked, “Do you think it’s one of your people?”

Ava hadn’t even thought of that possibility. Of course, it wouldn’t be a walker loose, Negan was too smart to have any blind spots for the dead. However, she couldn’t imagine Rick giving permission for an attack. Then again, Ava didn’t exactly wait for him to tell her to pull the trigger.

“I don’t know,” Ava answered honestly. “All I know is that I’ll head to Alexandria and tell Rick about you guys…if you’re still willing to help--.”

“Yes.” Amber quickly interrupted, “Whatever you need.”

Ava smiled, and with one last touch of Amber’s shoulder, she left the lounge. Once Ava entered the corridor, she could hear the chaos erupting around her. It sounded as if the main attack was happening below her—of course, it was where she needed to go. With her knife at the ready, Ava went to the stairwell. She went down one flight, turning the corner only to meet the eye of another Savior. The burly man recognized her.

“Hey! You can’t be out here!”

As he spoke, Ava quietly nodded, putting on the airs of being timid. She turned around, acting as if she was walking up the stairs. At the last moment, Ava whipped around, using the butter knife to slash the man’s throat. He dropped to his knees, his mouth gurgling up blood. She closed her eyes, her mind taking her back to the Outpost attack.

 _I’m doing this to get by…_  

“Ava!”

Ava opened her eyes, her heart fluttering at the sight of Sasha. The woman lowered her gun, chest heaving as she wrapped Ava into a short hug. She melted against her, Ava feeling more than relieved to see her friend. However, they didn’t have time for pleasantries.

“Are you alone?” Ava asked, placing a hand on her arm as they separated.

“Rosita came with me, but…only one of us could get in.” Sasha explained, and Ava could tell there was more to the story, “Look, we don’t have time. I cut a whole in the gate, Alexandria is a straight shot from there.”

“And what about you?”

Although, Ava knew the answer. This was a one-way ticket for Sasha, but it didn’t have to be. Sasha’s features softened as she squeezed Ava’s hand.

“I’ll be fine.” A sad smile appeared, “Now go. Enid and Daryl need you.”

Ava watched as Sasha disappeared up the stairs, letting out a shaky breath before descending her own way. Despite saying goodbye to a friend, Ava felt a surge of hope. Daryl and Enid were alive, the Saviors haven’t taken everything from Ava yet.

However, one of them did stop her from making it to the door at the end of the hall. Ava yelped as she was lifted off the ground, her feet kicking as her captor backed into a dark adjacent hall. In a vain attempt to escape, Ava brandished her knife only for the man to catch her wrist.

“Really?!”

Ava recognized that voice, and it only made her try to get out of his grip more. Negan was unmoved, only squeezing Ava’s wrist until the pain made her let go of the knife. Once it clattered to the ground, Negan kicked it away.

“Trying to leave without saying goodbye?” Negan laughed, clinging Ava’s back to his chest. “You really know how to bruise a man’s ego, doll.”

“I think you have bigger problems than me right now.”

 “My ‘bigger problem’ ran right past me,” He scoffed, and Ava could feel the rumble in his chest. “She’ll be dealt with, don’t you worry.”

A shiver went down Ava’s spine. Sasha ran into the Factory expecting to die, but in Negan’s world, there was always something worse. She swallowed.

“Don’t hurt her.”

“Oh, come on.” Ava could practically feel his eye roll, “You know better than anyone that I don’t kill useful people.”

“I’m not talking about killing.”

Silence enveloped the pair until Negan clicked his tongue. The sound vibrated within Ava, and she wondered if it was a noise of thought or if Negan was truly disappointed in her for thinking little of him. The man sighed.

“That’s up to her, just like it was up to you,” He explained, quietly and slowly.  “You are so going to regret your little escape plan.”

Ava didn’t answer, knowing her words would only make Negan talk more. She lost her chance to get out undetected—and Ava knew the leader was going to make sure she didn’t get another. Ava stayed silent, only clenching her jaw when Negan summoned one of the Saviors to take her to his room.    

* * *

_"She’s alive, so you can put that glare away for the day.”_

_Relief flooded Ava’s body. Although Negan had made it clear that he didn’t want Sasha to die, Ava worried about what would happen if one of his men didn’t get the message. Luckily, it was no longer a concern. Now Ava could move on._

_“Can I see her?”_

_The moment the question left her mouth, Ava knew she made a mistake. Negan raised a brow in her direction as he shrugged off his leather jacket._

_“Oh, Ava.” A small smile crept on his face, “You’re not leaving my sight for a long time.”_

Enid looked out into the water, closing her eyes as she felt the soft breeze blow through her hair. Oceanside was located on the edge of nowhere, and Enid had never been more jealous. It was always a dream of hers to live close by the water; Ava always joked that if she were to get one she might as well let her move in since Ava would never plan to leave.

The fantasy in Enid’s mind faded when she heard Carl cock a gun next to her. She was reminded why they were here—and why she wouldn’t be jealous of the Oceansiders much longer. 

“Do you ever think about who you’ve killed?”

Enid had been thinking of the question for a while now. They weren’t here to kill the Oceanside community, but by taking away their guns, they were allowing something—or someone—else to. Silence enveloped the pair, and Enid was about to tell Carl to forget it when he answered.

“All the time.”

She pursed her lips. Enid figured her apprehension was visible when Carl spoke up.  

“We’re going to bring them back.”

She nodded, “I’ll make sure of it.”

“I know you will.” He smiled. 

Enid felt that same flutter in her stomach. They hadn’t spoken about their kiss—both of their first kisses. She had a feeling they never would. Carl expected to die that day, and Enid thought she would never see him again. Neither planned for the discussion to come up, and she had a feeling it never would.

“Hey.” Romance was erased from Enid’s mind as Daryl came walking up to her, “You ready for this?”

She shrugged, “It has to be done.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

Enid raised a brow, the tone and words reminding her of why she was doing this—or, more accurately, who she was doing this for.

“Wow.” Enid laughed, “You and Ava really do belong together.”

Daryl rolled her eyes, but Enid could see signs of blushing on his features. Before he could retaliate, Rick came marching over. The look of determination on his face made Enid’s heart sank—Tara ran out of time.

“The minute those explosions go off, we need to go in.” Rick instructed, his eyes darting between Daryl and the teens. “We do this quick and clean. Don’t hurt them.”

“Wasn’t planning on it.” Daryl mumbled.

Enid noticed how the last instruction was pointed at Daryl. It wasn’t a secret that Daryl was ready to take the Saviors down, and Rick wanted to make sure he wasn’t blinded by his hatred of Negan. Oceanside was just another community trying to get by, and Enid had a feeling that they wouldn’t be too keen on giving up their guns if they brought pain to their residents.

 As if on cue, an explosion sounded in the distance. Rick and Carl took off running, ready to commence the plan. Daryl was about to follow, but he was stopped by Enid’s hesitation. She needed to know that she wasn’t alone in this. Daryl would make sure she never felt alone while Ava was gone.

“Hey,” He gently patted her shoulder. “We got this.”

Although Enid didn’t believe him, she followed him anyway.

* * *

Ava hoped that being locked in Negan’s room for the day would present an opportunity for her to find a way to end him. However, after wandering around the apartment, Ava found that most of the drawers and cabinets were locked. The ones that weren’t housed clothing and towels—and sadly, Ava hadn’t reached that level of deadliness yet to turn those items into a weapon.

She ended up falling asleep on the couch, the exhaustion of being up all night finally catching up to Ava until the sound of the door opening and closing roused her from her slumber. Ava kept her eyes closed, but she knew who it was from the familiar chuckle in the air.

“Making yourself comfortable, I see.”

Eyes still closed, Ava decided to skip the uncomfortable small talk. She only cared about one thing, after all.

“How’s Sasha?”

“Open those pretty eyes and I’ll tell you.”

Ava clenched her jaw. She wanted nothing more than to keep them closed, if just to spite him. However, after trying to escape last night, Alexandria was on thin ice. With a sigh, Ava followed his order and was greeted by Negan looking down at her. With her position on the couch, his face was upside down, the smirk ever pleasant.

“There she is.” He raised his brows, “Your girl is fine. Had to break the news that you didn’t get out though, took it hard.”

Ava sat up on the couch, watching as Negan made his way over to the bar. She wondered if it was his first drink of the day—considering that he was dealing with another assassination attempt, Ava doubted it.

“Let me talk to her.”

She wanted to check if Sasha was okay. Negan may not have harmed her physically, but Ava was all too familiar with the games he liked to play. He turned to face Ava, rattling the ice in his glass.

“You’re in no position to be making demands.” He took a sip of whiskey before making his way over to her, “Hell. Maybe I was too lenient, gave you too much freedom.”

Ava swallowed a scoff. Forcing her into a marriage and squeezing into a black dress was too much freedom. She looked up at him.

“What are you going to do?”

Negan sat on the coffee table in front of the couch and Ava found herself shifting her legs away from his.

“It’s what you’re going to do.” He smirked, “We gotta earn some trust back, doll. And I think taking a trip to Alexandria is the best way to start.”

 Ava felt her body go cold. Negan was going to use her to keep her friends in line and the worst part was she didn’t know what he was planning. However, taking in the smirk and darkness in his eyes, Ava knew it was going to be worst than anything she could imagine. Negan chuckled and patted her knee before getting up.

“Enjoy the couch, kid.”

With that, he left her. Ava sat up straight all night, her stomach doing flips.


	37. The First Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle begins, and Ava seizes an opportunity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Sorry for the delay - work has been crazy.  
> But tonight, this story is ending! After this chapter, I will be posting an epilogue later tonight.
> 
> More information about the next installment in this series will be in the epilogue. Stay tuned :).

The streets of Alexandria were vacant, everyone either asleep or in the house Enid was desperately trying not to stare at. She couldn’t help herself as she passed the makeshift jail on the way to load Hilltop’s cut of the Oceanside’s guns into Jesus’ car. Like the rest of the group, Enid didn’t expect to see Rosita waiting for them at the gate, her whole body growing cold when she noticed Sasha’s absence.

The dread was replaced with a whole other feeling when Rosita informed them that she brought Dwight back with her.

While the rest of the group went to interrogate, Enid stayed behind. When Daryl asked why, she quickly came up with the excuse that she needed to start packing away the guns. Granted, it was a valid lie—it was late, and Jesus would want to get on the road the moment he was finished.

 “Hey.”

Enid looked up from her boots to see Carl walking towards her.

“Hi.” She nodded towards the house, “I’m surprised you’re not in there.”

“I wanted to check on Judith.” He glanced at the box in her hands, “Need help?”

 She shook her head, “I’m done.”

Carl raised a brow as Enid closed the trunk with a bang. She was holding something back, he could tell.

“Why aren’t you in there?”

She patted the trunk, “Busy.”

Enid bent down, picking up her backpack as she made her way to the front of the car. She didn’t want to get psychoanalyzed by Carl. However, much like most things in Enid’s life that involved Carl, she didn’t have a choice.

“You’re scared.” He followed her to the hood, the pair standing in front of the off taillights. “You’re worried that Dwight came with bad news.”

Enid didn’t answer, not seeing a need since Carl clearly knew her. There was not a doubt in her mind Dwight came to Alexandria to convince Rick that he was on their side and, after hearing Daryl talk about how Negan needled the man, Enid believed him. Sort of. She would have to wait and see how Daryl responds to the news. If he can trust Dwight, Enid could too. 

It wasn’t Dwight’s supposed alliance that was eating her up inside. Carl was right. Enid had been believing that Ava was still alive, but Dwight had the power to burst that bubble. If Ava was alive, Enid could fight. If her sister was gone, she would self-destruct.

“He’s the only one who can tell you what’s going on with Ava.” Carl pointed out, “Why does your mind go to the worst?”

“Because that’s all I’ve ever been dealt.” Enid’s voice rose before going quiet, “I…can’t lose someone again. Especially not her.”

She closed her eyes, trying to fend off the tears that threatened to fall. However, she opened them instantly when she felt a gentle touch on her cheek, Carl staring at her with a look Enid could only describe as love. Love.

“You need to give yourself more credit.” He whispered, “You’re one of the strongest people I know.”

Enid blinked, her own voice in a whisper. “I kissed you.”

“I know.” Carl chuckled, “I was there.”

“You never told me if you liked it.”

He twisted his features in feign thought. “Can you give me a reminder?”

Enid rolled her eyes but fulfilled his request. She planted a gentle kiss to his lips, Carl instantly kissing back. Unlike their first, this carried a bit more passion. Enid’s heart fluttered, and she thought it ended too soon as Carl pulled away.

“Yep.” He spoke, breathless. “Still like it.”

Enid smiled, taking his hands in hers. “So…what does this mean?”

“How about we take it slow?”

Relief washed through Enid. She liked Carl, that much was sure, but with everything going on, they couldn’t worry about romance. All of their energy had to go into the pending war. She didn’t expect any less from Carl Grimes. Enid nodded.

“Good plan.”

His eyes slightly widened, “We can still kiss though, right?”

Instead of answering his questions with words, Enid went in for another lip lock. However, just as their lips brushed, a booming voice cut through the quiet night.

“Hey!” Daryl chided, Rick and Dwight in tow. “What’s goin’ on out here?”

 Carl jerked away from Enid as if she was burning hot. Enid rolled her eyes, arms crossed as Daryl inspected the pair with judging eyes. It was almost like Ava never left.

“We were just loading up the car, Daryl.” Enid explained.

“Yeah,” Daryl scoffed. “Sure looks like it.”

“Enough.” Rick spoke before Enid could fire back, a look of amusement in his eyes, “We don’t have time for this. Dwight needs to head back before Negan notices.”

“What’s keeping him?” Carl glared at the man.

Despite Carl’s hostility, Dwight paid him no mind. Instead, he focused on Enid, a sheepish expression on his face. She knew what was coming, and she wished he wouldn’t say it.

“Ava’s fine.” He slowly reassured, and Enid tried not to get too excited as she waited for him to continue, “But Negan…forced her into a marriage with him.”

Enid’s heart sank. Carl told them all about the wives Negan had when he came back from his visit at the Sanctuary. She never thought that Ava would fall into the trap.

“Why?” Enid asked, needing to know. “How?”

“He told her that he’d go easier on Alexandria during pickups.” He explained, “She did it for you, all of you.”

Enid understood. Negan knew how much Ava cared about Alexandria, and he played right into her hand to get what he wanted. She noticed how Dwight glanced over at Daryl, the man’s fist clenching with rage. Like Enid, he hated to even think of Ava being in the same room as Negan, let alone married to him.

Which is why she had to ask her next question, no matter how much it made her want to vomit.

“Have they…”

“No, god no.” Dwight interrupted, not wanting to get a punch from Daryl. “That wouldn’t be something Negan would keep to himself. Trust me.”

Since it sounded as if Dwight was speaking from experience, Enid nodded. She shared a look with Daryl, the man still possessing a sour expression on his face. Rick sighed, looking between the pair before turning to Dwight.

“I guess we have to.” 

* * *

_Negan was already gone when Ava woke up early the next morning. She was sure she had only gotten a few minutes of sleep, her head foggy and the sun not even out yet. It was hard to sleep when she didn’t know what was coming today—all she knew was that Alexandria was on the agenda. Ava sat up on the couch, rubbing her eyes when a note on the coffee table caught her attention._

**_We leave at 7. Wear what I laid out for you. Don’t be too much of a pain in the ass today. –N_ **

_Out of pure rage, Ava crumbled the note before getting up and walking to Negan’s made bed. When she saw what laid on top of it, her anger only grew._

_“Oh, hell no.”_

Ava kept her eyes straight ahead as she walked through the halls of the factory. The minute she made eye contact with the people staring was when everything would fall apart. She couldn’t blame them. If she saw a woman wearing a backless black lace dress in the apocalypse, she wouldn’t stop staring either.

Despite her hatred towards the garment, the dress offered a great distraction. No one asked her where she was going, or if Negan knew she was out. Ava needed to talk to Sasha before they left for Alexandria. Maybe she knew more about the plan.

Plus, Ava just needed to know that her friend was okay.

The cells were unguarded, no doubt Negan needing the extra manpower for today. Ava didn’t know how many prisoners the Sanctuary had, or if there was an order of how they put people away, but she decided to head to her old cell first.

Stopping in front of the door, Ava pursed her lips. She hoped Sasha was in here, the last thing Ava needed was to give someone false hope that she was going to get them out of here. She took a leap of faith.

“Sasha?”  

“Oh god, Ava?” Sasha’s voice was filled with sadness, “I thought you got out.”

“I tried, but Negan caught me.” Ava glanced down the hall, making sure they were still alone before pressing further into the door. “We’re going to Alexandria today…do you know why?”

“He wants to lay down the law again—somehow, he found out that Rick is trying to stage an uprising.” Sasha shakily sighed, “He’s going to use us, Ava. We can’t let that happen.”

Ava put her hand to the cold metal. Before the group even made a move, Negan was ready to take out another person from their family. It wouldn’t be either of them, he was smart enough to know that he needed to keep two people as collateral—as proof that subjugation from Negan didn’t have to mean death.

It could be so much worse.

“We won’t.” Ava promised, her tone hard. “Once we get there, we need to try to cut loose from the Saviors. We can’t trust Eugene, but maybe I can scrounge up weapons for us--.”

“There’s no time, Ava.” Sasha interrupted, “I…I know what to do.”

“What?” Ava asked, and when Sasha didn’t respond, Ava pressed her forehead to the door. “Sasha, what are you--.”

“Ah, perfect!” Negan’s booming voice bounced down the corridor. “Just the two gals I needed to see.”

When Ava was sure Sasha wasn’t going to answer her question, she stepped away from the cell door. She tried to make herself look as unappealing as possible, but from the way Negan’s eyes lit up and his smile grew wolfish, Ava had a feeling it didn’t matter.

“You, my dear, look fantastic.” He ran a hand down Ava’s arm, making her shiver. He chuckled, “You’re going to make all your friends stop in their tracks.”

“So, that’s the big plan?” Ava asked, annoyed. “Hope the community gets distracted by a black dress?”

He scoffed, “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

Without a word, Negan lifted Lucille to Ava, waiting for her to take it. Rolling her eyes, Ava obliged as he brandished a key and went to open the door. Ava held onto the weapon tightly, considering lifting the bat and bringing it down on the back of Negan’s neck. Then, she thought of all the Saviors outside and how they would take their anger out on her family.

She swallowed her pride and instead focused on Sasha slowly walking out of the cell. Overcome with relief at seeing her friend unharmed, Ava enveloped Sasha in a hug. The woman hugged back just as tightly, and Ava wondered if there was more to the embrace that she wasn’t understanding.

“Don’t worry, you two will be seeing each other a lot after today.” Negan grinned as the two separated, “Now, come on. Daylight’s burnin’.”

He took Lucille back from Ava before striding down the hallway, Sasha and Ava in tow. Sasha blinked, taking in Ava’s appearance.

“What the hell are you wearing?”

Ava shook her head, “Don’t ask.”

* * *

 

_“You don’t have to take the trip in the…thing.”_

_Ava couldn’t hide her look of disgust as Negan gestured to the casket. He had told the pair a little of his plan, enough for them to know their roles. From Eugene tensing beside her, Ava could tell she wasn’t the only one uncomfortable as Sasha shook her head._

_“I could use the rest.” Her tone was casual, “Just need a bottle of water and I’ll be fine.”_

_Before climbing into the casket, Sasha spare one last look to Ava, offering a single nod. Ava nodded back, a sudden knot in her stomach as she watched Negan close the door._

Daryl wished he was surprised to hear Eugene using an air horn to bat for Negan, but he knew the man too well to be disappointed in him. While it was in his nature to fight, to take the hard path to get back to his family, it was in Eugene’s to think of himself - to fold.

Daryl looked over to Rosita, frowning. He wished he was wrong about Eugene—if only for her sake.

“Where’s Negan?” Rick asked, annoyance in his tone.

Eugene lowered the horn, his words powerful enough to send a shock to the community. “I’m Negan.”

From his spot on the ground, it looked as if Rick was considering not going through with the plan. However, after hearing those two words, the leader made up his mind and nodded at Rosita. Daryl braced himself as the woman pressed the button, waiting for the explosion. Waiting for all of this to be over.

It never came.

* * *

 

Dread shot through Ava’s body as she watched her friends get guns pulled on them by a mysterious group. A group that she assumed Rick thought was on his side. Ava shook her head in disgust—Negan was truly always a step ahead when it came to Rick. Negan merely chuckled, leaning over in his seat to whisper to her.

“Never trust garbage people, doll.” He hit the roof of the truck, “Dwight! Let’s get it.”

Before Ava could say anything, Dwight gripped onto Ava’s forearm, pulling her out of the truck behind him. Ava met Rick gaze, the man looking down at her from his place on the scaffolding with anger.

However, after seeing the way she was being dragged to the side, his anger melted into concern. It was abundantly clear that Ava wasn’t like Eugene, not when she was trying to fight her way out of Dwight’s grasp.

“You’re going to make things worse,” The scarred man hissed in her ear.

 The sharp edge in Dwight’s voice made Ava stop squirming. There was another note in his voice that Ava couldn’t make out. She didn’t have time to decipher the tone, instead deciding to glare at the man before turning back to her friends.

“You just tried to blow us up, right?” Negan spoke, a tinge of amusement in his tone. “I mean…I get me, my people, but Eugene? He’s one of yours!” He then turned to Ava, gesturing towards her with Lucille. “Would you have blown dear Ava up? You don’t even know what she’s done for you. You people are animals!”

Ava could feel eyes on her, knowing that her group was trying to decipher what exactly Negan meant. She didn’t care what they thought – well, Ava did care about what one person thought. Her eyes instantly landed on Daryl, the man surrounded by guns but only looking at her with concern and confusion. Ava wanted nothing more than to run to him, hold him as she explained that the black dress had no meaning for her.

However, Dwight was right. Making a wrong move would only make things worse for her friends – and herself.

“Dwight, Simon, chop-chop.”

On command, Dwight handed Ava over to Eugene before following Simon onto the platform. Ava held her breath as they took the cover off Sasha’s casket, the pair standing the item upright as Negan stood next to it.

“So, you don’t like Eugene anymore – you guys gotta like Sasha.” He began, “I do too, got her packaged right here for your convenience. I brought her so I wouldn’t have to kill all of you, and not killing all of you could get complicated.”

Ava clenched her jaw as Negan began listing his demands. She could feel Eugene shaking as he held her arms. Maybe she could slip out of his grip, cause a distraction—

“Let me see her.” Rick growled.

 “Oh. Just give me a second. I might have to get her up to speed, you can’t hear shit inside this thing.” Negan chuckled as he went to crack open the door, “Sash, you’re not going to believe this shit!”

The tension in the air cracked as a growl echoed through the area. Ava looked up just in time to see Sasha’s reanimated corpse bursting out of the casket, her teeth chomping as she pushed a shocked Negan off the truck bed. It only took a moment for the bullets to begin flying, Alexandria taking advantage of the surprise attack.

Letting his fear get the better of him, Eugene pushed Ava down to the ground. She let the air escape her lungs, looking over with blurred vision as Eugene ran for cover. Ava rolled her eyes – well, at least she didn’t have to hurt him.

For once, Ava followed his lead, and she stayed on her stomach as she crawled underneath the truck bed. She needed to get inside Alexandria, but with the bullets that were pelting the vehicles around her, Ava needed a weapon.

After a moment, a Savior’s boots came into view. Ava seized the opportunity and clenched a hand around his ankle, pulling him down to the ground. His head met the concrete with a sickening crack, knocking him out cold.

Ava didn’t feel an ounce of guilt as she grabbed his gun and unsheathed his knife before running through the gates of her home.

* * *

 

_“It’s all about to happen.”_

_Enid nodded along with Jesus’ words. The war was going to start – today. And Rick wanted the Hilltop to stay where they were. If things went south for Alexandria, their people would be a secret weapon. However, as Enid took in Maggie’s expression, she knew that wouldn’t fly._

_“Do you think we should lead the Hilltop over there to fight?”_

_Maggie glanced at Enid, “They’re going to need help, even with the Scavengers on their side.”_

_Enid agreed – Negan needed to realize that everyone was going against him. It was a bonus that Ava could be there. Enid would do anything to break her out, or she would die trying._

Ava abandoned her high heels a long time ago as she ran through Alexandria. She had taken out a couple of Saviors, helped a few Alexandrians find cover, but still couldn’t find anyone from her own family. Ava leaned her back against a van, catching her breath and trying to clear her mind.

She reassured herself that just because she hadn’t run into anyone, didn’t mean the worst. They all had their own battles to face. Ava did recognize the people of Alexandria – and just Alexandria. Hilltop was nowhere to be seen, which meant Enid was back at the community. At least that gave Ava relief.

Her calm didn’t last long – Ava’s eyes were still closed when her body was suddenly slammed into the van. Her eyes shot open to see a male Savior lifting a knife towards her face – her mother’s knife. The knife she gave Enid.  Her heart rate instantly sped up as she dodged the blade, sliding underneath his legs before getting back to her feet and stabbing him in the back.

“Where the fuck did you get that?!” She yelled over his wail of pain.

The man didn’t answer, only groaning as he kicked his foot behind him, nailing Ava in the abdomen and sending her to the ground. Before she could get up, he got on top of her, knife aimed right at her eye. Ava caught his wrist, trying to keep him from shoving it in her socket. She wasn’t going to die – not by a Savior and not by her mother’s knife.

Not when she didn’t know where Enid was.

“You’re…all going to die.” He bit out, the pain from the blade in his back making him weak, “He’ll kill you all-.”

His threat – and life – was cut short when a stick came through his chest. Ava let out a sharp breath at the sight of the end of the staff right in front of her face. It moved to the side, throwing the Savior off her and revealing Morgan, the man twirling the staff before resting it on his side.

He held out his hand, waiting to help her up. “You alright?”

“Never better.” Ava ignored the fire in her legs as Morgan pulled her up, “Thanks for the save.”

She was grateful, if not a little confused. The last time she saw Morgan – before he disappeared to find Carol – he was against killing the Saviors. Well, more like against killing anyone. She wondered what changed.

“There was no way you were going out like that.” He eyed her tattered dress before continuing, “Especially after all you’ve been through.”

Life at the Sanctuary wasn’t easy, but Ava could only assume what Morgan was really thinking – the sympathetic gaze was enough to make her want to fade away. She didn’t respond to his words, instead merely sighing before bending down to pick up the knife that belonged to their family – that belongs to Enid. The thought of her sister made Ava pause. If Morgan was here, that meant more than Alexandria was fight today. And Enid was never one to pass on a fight.

“Enid.” Was all Ava could say, eyes wide. “Is she here?”

“I saw her with Maggie.” Morgan was quick to answer, knowing how lost she felt. “They were going to help Rick.”

“What happened to—”

Before Ava could ask about Rick, she was cut off by a roar. An animal roaring. All her questions suddenly seemed so unimportant as she looked around, trying to locate the sound.

“Was…was that a lion?”

“Eh, close enough.” Morgan couldn’t help but give a small smile as he nodded in a direction, his feet already moving. “Come on, we have to finish this!”

Ava couldn’t agree more as the pair took off running towards the front of Alexandria.

* * *

 

Rick and Carl Grimes were the luckiest men alive.

That’s what Enid thought as she ran next to Maggie, guns raised as they took out the surrounding Saviors. Just when it looked like Negan was going to end it, a tiger swooped in to spare Carl’s life. Enid remembered Jesus mentioning that the Kingdom’s leader had an “interesting” pet, but she didn’t expect that.

Enid cursed to herself as she fired towards a caravan, Negan holding up his middle finger out the window. He was a pretty lucky guy, too. Enid hoped that Ava wasn’t in that truck – but she didn’t spot her sister in the Community. Her heart sank at the prospect of Ava being stuck at the Sanctuary – not knowing what was happening. That would be pure torture for her.

The smoke began to fade in Alexandria, and Enid noticed how quiet it became as the Saviors drove out of view. She looked up, noticing a tired Daryl on top of a truck – he looked down at her, having the same thought: the battle today was over, but the war was just beginning.

Daryl’s gaze then shifted to behind Enid, his mouth slightly opening in surprise. Her mind instantly went to ‘danger,’ and Enid turned around, gun raised and finger on the trigger. As quickly as she raised the weapon, Enid put it down – her eyes blinking away tears as she took in the sight of her older sister.

Ava stood a fair distance away, a gun and knife at her sides. She was wearing a black dress, the garment ripped at the side of her legs, no doubt by Ava so that she could have more movement. Dirt covered her legs, her feet bare and cut from running on the blacktop.

She hadn’t seen her sister in so long – she almost looked like a different person. She looked exhausted, but that didn’t stop her from jogging towards Enid, the younger girl putting her gun safely away just in time to get enveloped into a hug from her elder.

“You’re here.”

Enid’s voice was quiet, still unable to believe Ava was holding her. She got all the proof she needed from Ava’s next words.

“Did your eyesight get worse while I was gone?”    

The younger girl let out a small laugh that morphed into a tearful cry of relief, “Jerk.”  

Ava giggled against her hair as she rubbed Enid’s back, trying to hide her own tears. Her gaze locked on Daryl’s, the man offering a small smile and nod. She could see the tears glistening in his eyes, and he wanted nothing more than to hold her – but he knew how much Enid needed to be with Ava, and vice versa.

That didn’t stop Ava from smiling back before giving Enid her full focus again – a silent promise of things to come.

And, for the first time in a while, Ava couldn’t wait for tomorrow. 

 

 

 


	38. Epilogue: The Rest of Your Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A moment of peace.

_“You think Sasha did that herself?”_

_“I don’t know how, but I know she did.”_

_“She gave us a chance.”_

The orange hue of sunset added a layer of hope as the residents worked to clean up the streets – and each other. Ava couldn’t help but grin at the sight of everyone helping. The last time she saw this many people in one place was before the end, and now here they were, getting along and getting ready to fight for a common goal: a brighter future.

She greeted everyone as she walked – a hug from Aaron and Eric, an embrace from Carol, and a wave and smile to Rosita. Ava was glad to see so many of her friends alive – and in one place – but she had places to be. And the quicker she was done with her task, the quicker she could get home to Enid.

Rick and Maggie were waiting for her on the Grimes’ porch. Ava ascended the stairs and was immediately wrapped into a hug by Rick, the gesture both surprising and moving to her. Ava felt her eyes begin to burn with tears as his low voice spoke.

“I’m so glad you made it home.”

It became clear to Ava that he was worried about losing her to Negan– and he couldn’t lose anyone else to him. Ava offered his back a pat before separating, a small smile on her face.

“Well, I want to be here when we win.”

“And we will.”

Maggie spoke up, and Ava instantly hugged her, the woman accepting the embrace. Ava would be sure that they win – if only for Maggie. Ava owed her more than she could say.

“Thank you for watching after Enid.”

She playfully scoffed as they ended the hug, “She’s looking after me.”

Ava smiled, knowing she was right. Enid wouldn’t be staying in Alexandria for long – she had her place back at Hilltop, taking care of Maggie. Unlike the first time she was leaving, Ava wasn’t worried. Enid proved she could be myself – just like she proved she could care about more than herself.

They moved inside the house, and Ava raised her brows in surprise at the sight of an unfamiliar man. However, taking in the staff he carried and the way he carried himself, Ava had a guess.

“Ava, this is Ezekiel – _King_ Ezekiel.” Rick smoothly corrected himself, “He leads the Kingdom.”

She nodded, “It’s nice to meet you.”

“And it’s lovely to meet the famous Ava.” The King grinned as they shook hands, “Your friends speak highly of you.”

“I’m pretty fond of them, too.”

Ava was so fond of them that she was ready to fight on the front lines for them – and they felt the same. Maggie placed a gentle hand on her back as she addressed the group.

“Let’s get started.” 

It was a gentle command, but Ava appreciated it. Maggie knew how much Ava wanted to go home, but she was willing to play her part for the bigger picture as they all took their seats in the living room. From his spot across from Ava, Rick leaned forward.

“Tell us everything you can.”

* * *

 

_"We mean everything to each other."_

Ava leaned against her front door and took a breath. She needed a moment – Ava didn’t realize how much being taken by Negan affected her until she started talking about it. She kept it together throughout the conversation, not wanting to appear shaken in front of the leaders.

They needed to know how the Saviors worked, if any of them would be willing to turn against Negan. Besides the wives – and Dwight – Ava didn’t know who would be willing to defect. She thought about how they all got to one knee in front of him, like a God.

Ava closed her eyes and shook her head. She didn’t need to think about that. Not right now. Instead, she decided to focus on the one person who mattered.

She climbed the stairs, hoping Enid didn’t decide to turn in for the night just yet. The residents of Hilltop weren’t heading back to the community bright and early – Maggie knew her people needed to rest, especially since long days and nights were ahead.  

Ava slowly opened Enid’s door, a small grin on her face as a gentle breeze hit her. Enid had her back to her, the younger sister sitting on the roof as she surveyed the night sky. She wondered what she was thinking back – if she was worried about the impending war. Ava supposed there was only one way to find out.

“Want some company?” Ava poked her head out the window.

Enid turned to face her, smiling. “Duh.” Ava let out a small laugh as she climbed up, Enid watching her with interest, “How did the meeting go?”

“Some information was valuable, some wasn’t.” Ava shrugged it off as she adjusted herself.  “I told them as much as I could.”

She didn’t want to talk about Negan anymore – sadly, it seemed that it was all Enid wanted to talk about.

“Think you’ll tell me one day?”

Ava looked down at her feet hanging off the side of the roof. She wasn’t planning to keep her time at the Sanctuary a secret from Enid, but she couldn’t find the words to tell her. At least, not right now.

“I will.” Ava promised, “Just not tonight. I’d rather hear about Hilltop.”

Luckily, Enid didn’t fight her, instead diving into her new life at the Community. Ava smiled and chimed in at the proper points – her heart warmed as she saw how Enid lit up with each word. She mentioned a visit from the Saviors, and that reminded Ava of what was attached to her belt.

“I bet you were missing this.”

Enid looked down at the knife in Ava’s hand, a breath of relief coming out of her mouth before taking it and hugging Ava so hard that she was afraid she was going to fall off the roof.

“Where did you find it?”

“Doesn’t matter.” Ava decided to keep her near-death experience to herself, “You want to tell me what happened?”

She watched as Enid held the knife, a tender look on her face. “They’re just all jerks.”

Ava scoffed, “You’re not wrong.” 

“I’m going to help them fight.” Enid quickly confirmed what Ava already knew, “Hilltop isn’t like us – Maggie is going to need all the help she can get.”

A small part of Ava wanted to argue. She doubted the Saviors were going to be taking prisoners, and the thought of losing Enid to those scumbags made her want to vomit. She knew enough that Enid wouldn’t take no for an answer – maybe Ava could work out something with Maggie to make sure she was protected.

“Okay, okay.” Ava nodded before putting a finger up, “One condition-.”

“Oh god.”

“Listen.” She warned, “You can fight, but not on the front lines, alright?”

Enid was quiet for a moment, but she surprised Ava when she nodded. Enid wanted to fight, and she was willing to do that in anyway she can.

“Deal.” She agreed as she leaned back on her hands, “Only as long as you don’t take anymore stupid shots.”

Ava shot Enid a look, making the younger girl smirk. After what happened, Ava had no plans for a rogue assassination attempt. She offered Enid a small grin.

“Deal.”

Ava lifted her arm, and Enid accepted the invite as she nestled into her sister’s side. The pair sat in silence – enjoying each other’s company and the calm silence of the night. A calm before the storm.

* * *

 

_"Not as strangers, but as family."_

Ava quietly closed the door to the bedroom, not wanting to stir Enid awake. The two stayed up way longer than they should have – just talking, not about the war or the Saviors, but about their lives. The past. It was nice to reminisce before getting to work.

She descended the stairs, making sure every light was off. When she got to the living room, Ava paused when she spotted a figure in the window. She peeked out the curtains, a small smile forming on her features when she realized who was sitting on her porch steps. Ava wasted no time going out the door.

“Hey.”

 Daryl turned around, quickly getting to his feet when he saw Ava in front of him. It was surreal to see him – he looked more alive than the last time she saw him under Negan’s boot. She did notice that he kept his eyes low to the ground – as if afraid to look at her.

“Hey.” He spoke shyly, “It’s late.”

“Too late to be waiting outside.” Ava voiced with an edge of humor as she tried to capture his gaze, “You could’ve knocked.”

“You and Enid needed to time.”

And that’s why Ava liked Daryl. He cared about Enid, more than any other guy in Ava’s life did. She slowly walked towards him.

“Enid told me how you were there for her.” She spoke slowly, “Thank you.”

“It was nothin’.”

“Daryl.” Ava’s voice was firm, “Look at me.”

He obliged, and it was then Ava saw his eyes glistening with unshed tears. After a day of gaining a victory in the fight against the Saviors, it wasn’t the sight Ava was expecting. It broke her heart. She walked closer to him, resting a hand on his cheek, her eyes searching his for answers.

“Did he…”

Daryl couldn’t finish his sentence and Ava didn’t need him to.

“No, never.” Ava promised, “He killed someone who tried.”

“Wow.” Daryl wiped his eyes, “What a stand-up guy.”

She let out a small laugh at that, and Daryl smiled at the sound. He put his hand on top of her own, lowering it from his cheek and to his lips for a soft kiss. The gesture was gentle enough to make Ava want to cry.

“What happens now?” Ava whispered.

“Whatever we want.”

Without a second thought, Ava planted a kiss on his lips. Daryl instantly went along, his mouth moving against hers as if it was always meant to – like fitting a puzzle piece she didn’t know she was missing. They separated, but Ava wanted more. From the way Daryl was looking at her, she knew she wasn’t alone.  

“Want to come in?” She nodded towards the door, “Enid’s out like a light and I could use some company.”

“I do.” Daryl’s smile faltered slightly, “But…you should know this is new to me. All of it.”

Ava figured that a guy like Daryl wouldn’t be too experienced and she was fine with that. For the first time in a long while, Ava didn’t want a man just for their physically companionship. She wasn’t in love with his body, she was in love with his soul.

“We’ll take it slow.” Ava kept her hands in his, “We have all the time in the world.”

Daryl didn’t respond, only giving her one last kiss before allowing Ava to lead him into her home.

The fight for tomorrow would begin in the morning. For now, Ava just wanted to focus on tonight – and not on surviving.  

Life was good – and she was ready to fight to keep it that way.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! Thank you so much for staying with this story and all the lovely comments - even with my update schedule sucking.
> 
> Okay, so obviously, this is not really the end. There will be more from Ava in the upcoming second story of this series - which will be out by the end of this week! 
> 
> I hope you plan on continuing the journey <3


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